夜间法庭（2023）

Night Court S01E06

Part 2 April 28, 2023, 11:20 a.m.

And he's coming to this court?
哦是吗？
-Oh, is he?
哦这...这太奇怪了
Oh, that's -- that's weird.
-我没有... -别装了
I never -- -Don't play.
你来这是想和他合影的吗？
Are you here to get a picture with him?
好吧我会带你偷偷去排队的
Alright, I'll sneak you into the lineup,
但如果有人指认你是罪犯你就只能靠自己了
but if someone identifies you as the perp, you're on your own.
我本来没打算告诉你因为我觉得你不会明白的
I wasn't going to tell you because I didn't think you'd get it,
但我们来这是看庭审的
but we're here to see the trial
这样当政♥府♥迫♥害♥Malcolm FX的时候我们就能采取行动
so when the system screws Malcolm FX, we can take action.
采取行动？在我的法庭上？
-Take action? In my courtroom?
酷酷酷
Cool, cool, cool.
额这可是大♥麻♥烦
Uh, that is fire.
法官我有个有趣的新主意
-Judge, fun new idea.
哦我喜欢有趣的新主意
-Ooh, I love fun new ideas.
你觉得把法槌的声音改成“噗铃噗铃”怎么样？
What do you think about a gavel that goes "boi-oi-oing"?
我就是不确定这该用某种音效
I'm not sure if it should be a sound effect
还是一个超响的弹簧
or a superloud spring.
嗯我在想不如我们送孩子们回家怎么样？
-Well, I was thinking what if we send the kids home?
解散正义伙伴？
-Disband the Justice Buddies?
是啊他们已经接受了足够的鼓舞
-Yeah, they've already been plenty inspired by
“由艾比.斯通呈现的法律大启蒙”
"Abby Stone presents Law-zzle Daw-zzle."
啊好吧那只是个预演
-Aw, well, that was just the previews.
接下来该特色表演了
It's time for the feature presentation.
嗯嗯预演才是最好的部分
-Mnh-mnh. The previews are the best part.
我甚至都不看电影
I don't even stay for the movie.
每次当影院灯光渐渐暗下来的时候我就已经起身了
When the lights go all the way down, I get all the way up.
相信我没有什么比看到司法系统运作更好的事情了
-Trust me, there is nothing better than seeing this justice system in action.
-你该要.... -嗯嗯好吧
-You want to... -Mm-hmm, yeah.
好吧
Okay.
额全体起立
Uh, all rise.
尊敬的艾比.斯通法官将主持
The Honorable Judge Abby Stone presiding
一个安稳而受人尊重的法庭
over a very calm and respectful court.
首先是对马尔科姆.理查森的公诉
-First up, the City vs. Malcolm Richardson,
又称Malcolm FX.
aka Malcolm FX.
法官阁下被告因丑♥化♥在中♥央♥公园的
-Your Honor, the defendant was caught defacing the statue
克里斯多弗.哥伦布雕像而被捕
of Christopher Columbus in Central Park
他用这个盖住了他的头
by covering his head with this.
克里斯多弗哥伦-屁♥股♥
我只是想冲洗那块...
-I was trying to flush that piece of --
哦！有孩子在呢
-Oh! Children.
他还是在浴盆里干的
-He also works in bidets.
哦！我喜欢艺术带给我的惊喜
Oh! I love it when art surprises me.
法官阁下我的司法助理让我了解了
Your Honor, my justice associate has familiarized me
FX先生的工作
with Mr. FX's work.
他并没有犯罪
He is no criminal.
他是个引发社会变革的艺术家
He is an artist who provokes social change,
一个能运用自己媒介
a man who uses his medium
为无法为自己发声的群体说话的人
to speak for those who cannot speak for themselves.
就和菲尔丁先生一样
-Just like Mr. Fielding.
啊小嘴真甜
-Ah, kiddo.
没有人说克里斯多弗.哥伦布是个好人
-No one is saying that Christopher Columbus is good.
他和我在你初来乍到的时候
He and I have very different opinions
该如何交朋友有着截然不同的观点
on how you should make friends when you're new in town.
难道你不觉得你可以在不触犯法律的前提下
Don't you think you could contribute to the debate
为这争论做出贡献吗？
without breaking the law?
我们已经争论了400多年了
-We've been debating for 400 years.
还有什么好多说的？
What more is there left to say?
没有伙计们事实胜于雄辩
Nah, man, actions speak louder than words.
没错！
-Yeah!
没错言论自♥由♥ 这是宪法第一修正案
-Yeah, freedom of speech, a right guaranteed to every citizen
赋予每一位公民的权力
by the First Amendment of the Constitution.
而这是史上最伟大的文件
And that document is the GOAT.
（GOAT，Greatest Of All Time）
而我将竭尽全力
And I will fight tooth and nail
为了我们的子孙后代确保它的存续
to make sure it exists for future generations.
好了好了保持安静
-Okay, okay, order.
古尔斯我能和你说句话吗？
Gurgs, can I talk to you a minute?
我是对的是吧？
I was right, huh?
旁观真实的庭审让他们都燃起来了对吧？
Watching the court in action got them real fired up, huh?
是啊燃起来了没错
-Yeah, fired up, alright.
你能让他们稍微冷静点吗？
-Think you can get them just to calm down a little bit?
好的
-Sure.
额但要我来说
Uh, but while I'm up here,
我认为这个指控对一个
I just think the charges seem a little harsh
想要表达自己的人来说有点过于严厉了
for someone who's trying to express himself.
如果克里斯多弗.哥伦布见到一个现代马桶
If Christopher Columbus would've seen a modern toilet,
他会搞不清那是什么东西
he wouldn't know what to do with it.
所以他有可能会把它戴在头上
He might have put it on his head.
我们都不知道会不会这样
We just don't know.
不幸的是我对此无能为力
-Unfortunately, my hands are tied.
这和言论自♥由♥无关
This isn't about freedom of speech.
他承认故意毁坏公共财产
He confessed to vandalizing public property.
我判处被告三♥级♥毁坏财物罪成立
I find the defendant guilty of third-degree criminal mischief.
反对！这个判决是不公正的！
-Objection! This system is rigged!
举起标语！
-Unleash the signs!
-我们想要的是什么？ -公正！
-What do we want? -Justice!
-我们何时想要？ -公正！
-When do we want it? -Justice!
我就说我们该多练练的
-I said we should get one more practice in,
但是没人听麦克斯的
but no one listens to Max.
这到底是怎么回事？
-What is going on?
我们在反抗这个不公正的体制
-We're protesting an unjust system
Malcolm FX除了说真话
that will find Malcolm FX guilty of anything
没有犯其他任何罪
except speaking the truth.
他们的横幅可比你做的好
-And they got a better banner than you.
听着你也许是个不错的魔术师
-Look, you seem like a nice magician,
但你也不过是一个崩坏体系的一部分
but you're a cog in a broken system.
你们充满激♥情♥ 这我很高兴
-There is a lot of passion here, which I love.
无论昼夜法庭都是错的！
-Day or night, court's not right!
无论昼夜法庭都是错的！
Day or night, court's not right!
可我不喜欢这样
-Don't love that.
尼尔能请你把法庭清空吗？
Neil, can you clear the court out, please?
还有嗯其他人我们能到大厅外边
And, um, everyone else, can I talk to you
没那么吵的地方谈谈吗？
out in the hall, where there's less chants?
什么没“机会”？
-Less "chance" of what?!
不是是没那么吵！
-No, less chants!
这里太吵了我根本听不清你在说什么！
-There's no chance we're gonna hear you over all these chants!
我们到外边去说！
Let's go out in the hall!
无论昼夜法庭都是错的！
-Day or night, court's not right!
无论昼夜法庭都是错的！
Day or night, court's not right!
-里边到底是怎么会是？ -好吧听着这都是我的错
-What is going on in there? -Okay, look, this is my fault.
-我应该... -这不是你的问题
-I should have -- -It's not your fault.
丹在他们面前大谈第一修正案
Dan's the one who got them all riled up, talking about
这才把他们兴头给惹起来的
the First Amendment for his little fan club.
我只是为我的委托人进行了激烈的辩护
-I was just making a passionate defense for my client.
事实上让整间房♥间的孩子反对你只是个有趣的小彩头
The fact that it turned a roomful of children against you is just a fun bonus.
不有趣的彩头是像比如你看
-No, a fun bonus is when you're watching
“与凯莉和瑞安一起生活”
"Live with Kelly and Ryan"
（与凯莉和瑞安一起生活是凯莉·里帕和瑞安·西克雷斯特联合主持的美国早间脱口秀节目）
但是瑞安·西克雷斯特今天缺席了
but Ryan Seacrest has the day off,
所以凯莉的老公顶上了
so Kelly's husband fills in
而你得以看他们整整一小时的秀恩爱
and you get to see their sexual tension for a full hour.
也许梦想破灭是件好事
-Maybe some disillusionment is a good thing.
现在克莱尔不会再进法律行业而我们能睡个好觉了
Now Claire doesn't go into law and we all sleep easier.
克莱尔我的小正义复仇女神
Claire, my little justice nemesis.
怎么能不知道克莱尔呢？她正试图毁了我
How do not know Claire? She's trying to destroy me!
我觉得你们都跑题了
-I think y'all are missing the point.
当泽维尔来找我并告诉我他们想要干什么...
When Xavier came to me and told me what they were going to do --
等等你知道他们要这么做？
-Wait, you knew they were going to do this?
-嗯我也是刚刚发现... -那你为什么不告诉我？
-Well, I only found out -- -Why didn't you tell me?
说实话我能明白这些孩子是什么情况
-If I'm being honest, I can see where the kids are coming from.
哦那太好了所以你可以和他们去谈谈
-Oh, that's great, so you can talk to them.