夜间法庭（2023）

Night Court S01E09

Part 4 April 28, 2023, 11:21 a.m.

不不是诱饵用词错误
No, bait-- Wrong word. Bad word.
不是诱饵应该是...
Not bait, but...
不是诱饵没错
No, bait's the right word.
我要用善意感化雷米卡
I wanted to kill Remecca with kindness,
而不是冷战射线武器
not Cold War radiation.
我的雷雷叔叔就是被感化的
My Uncle Ray-Ray was killed with kindness.
这是条很艰难的路
It's a rough way to go.
什么...?
What...?
哦不用管我
Oh, don't mind me.
回去继续你们扼杀言论自♥由♥的计划吧
Go back to your plan to stifle free speech.
一个在只有一扇门的房♥间...
A plan that would have worked better...
能更好执行的计划
in a room with one door.
好吧雷米卡我知道着看上去非常糟
Okay, Remecca, I know this looks bad.
你的播客是用来鼓舞人们的而如果你搞垮了我们
Your podcast is about inspiring people, and if you tear us down,
你真的会后悔的
I really think you're gonna regret this.
我从来不会后悔
I regret nothing.
-你说什么？ -他们不管这叫播友
- I'm sorry? - They don't call it pod-friends.
他们管这叫生意
They call it pod-business.
他们也这么叫？
Do they call it either?
嘿雷米卡...
Hey, Remecca...
这一节里你漏掉了个非常重要的环节
one very important thing you're missing for this episode.
一个全盘解密的访谈
A tell-all interview.
我会把所有事情都说清楚只有一个条件
I'll come clean about everything, under one condition.
你要让艾比置身事外
You leave Abby out of it.
还有你要给我们那种能装在小盒子里的大垫子
And you get us all giant mattresses that somehow come in tiny boxes.
成交
You have a deal.
对你也是
And so do you.
但顺便说一句你没法把它装回盒子里
But FYI, you can't put it back in the box
然后看着它再次展开来
and watch it unfold again.
你可以试试但不会有好结果的
You can try, but it will only end in madness.
丹我不能让你这么做
Dan, I can't let you do that.
你会丢掉你的工作的
You would lose your job.
你要知道当我提出那个条件的时候
You know, when I made that offer,
我没看到什么好的方面
I-I didn't see a bright side.
谢谢你帮我找到了
Thank you for finding it.
嘿我一直在给你发消息
Hey, I've been texting you.
是啊太奇怪了...我的手♥机♥罢♥工♥了
Yeah, it's weird-- my phone isn't working.
我所有的信♥用♥卡♥都消磁了
All my credit cards are erased,
而当我拿起勺子时它们都这样
and when I pick up spoons, they do this now.
所以我们不适合做假情侣是吗？
So, we don't really make the best fake couple, huh?
更可怕的是这算是我最健康的一段感情了
Scary thing is, this was actually one of my healthier relationships.
我也许真有些责任
I might have some real commitment issues.
你知道吗我留意你们俩有段时间了
You know, I have been watching the two of you,
你们绝对是一团乱麻
and you're an absolute trainwreck.
你们很适合我的新约会播客节目
You would be perfect for my new dating podcast,
"一团乱麻"
"Absolute Trainwreck."
事实上我们不是...
Actually, we're not--
会错过这样机会的人对吧宝贝?
Gonna pass up on an opportunity like this, right, babe?
但是有个条件
But there's one condition.
你不能播关于丹的事情
You can't run that story on Dan.
我拒绝
No.
额看来我们还是做不了英雄了
Eh, guess we're not all gonna be heroes.
好吧我想那期播客很快就会播出了
Well, I guess that episode of the podcast will be on soon.
这将是丹.菲尔丁辉煌事业的终点
The end of the illustrious career of Dan Fielding.
我们还有时间解决这事
We still have time to fix this.
我们只要能切断因特网在一分钟内
We just have to break the Internet, in one minute.
看来你们的确是没见识过社♥会♥主♥义♥的铁拳
这个麦芬看上去像耶稣吗？
Does this muffin look anything like Jesus?
雷米卡节目被取消了！
Remecca was canceled!
她失去了所有的赞助商
She lost all her sponsors,
并且平台封掉了她的播客
and her platforms dropped the podcast.
-什么? 发生了甚么事？ -有人深挖了她的底
- What? What happened? - Someone excavated her
发现她曾经是州北部某个广播台里
and found out she used to be a crazy sketchy shock jock
Shock jock是指美国近十多年来出现的一种杂谈广播节目主持人
吸引听众的手段是故意使用在广播中前所未闻的侮辱性的、粗俗不雅的语言，让听众感到震惊
疯狂并且声名狼藉的杂谈秀主持人
on a radio station upstate.
这里是锐捷特广播电台的贝基.莫尔森
This is Becky Molson for Reject Radio，
我从来不会后悔
and I regret nothing.
又到了玩蛋的星期三了小伙子们
It's Whirl 'Em Out Wednesday, boys,
所以揭开你们的包袱一起玩那些蛋吧！
so unwrap your package and whirl those balls!
哦哦！
Ooh!
那是性幻想库存之一
That's one for the Spank Bank.
Spank Bank是个网络俚语，大概就是说那种心里面存着的用来打飞机的图库
你都忘记了这城市之外还有多少种文化了
You forget how much culture there is outside of the cities.
-我猜这事传出去了 -你知道？
- I guess it got out. - You knew?
当雷米卡说 "我从来不会后悔"
When Remecca said, "I regret nothing,"
我怎么听怎么觉得耳熟所以我就深挖了下
I thought it sounded familiar, so I did some digging,
而事实证明她也有不怎么光彩的过去
and turns out, she also has a past that she's not proud of.
我也想着用这来说服她放丹一马
I thought I could use it to convince her to go easy on Dan,
但是她大笑着就离开了房♥间
but she laughed me out of the room.
好吧肯定是有人曝光了这事
Well, someone must have leaked it.
是我♥干♥的
I did.
你是谁？
Who are you?
现在...认出我了吗？
Recognize me... now?
是那个录音的伙计
The microphone guy.
所以是你搞垮雷米卡的？
So, you took Remecca down?
嗯我受够了生活在她的阴影下了
Well, I was tired of living in her shadow.
坐在家里一夜又一夜的
Sitting at home, night after night,
去除她那奇怪的口音
removing her weird mouth sounds.
但是你斯通法官你让我觉得...有在被倾听
But you, Judge Stone, you made me feel...heard.
-你干了什么？ -我也不知道
- What did you do? - I don't know.
我...我只是问过他是不是要坐下
I-I asked him if he wanted to sit down once.
大胆的家伙
The nerve of that guy.
你知道我是为你挡枪了
You know, I-I took a bullet for you.
帮助你身边人的唯一理由
The only reason to help your fellow man
就是让他们欠你人情
is to have them in your debt.
那是种永不贬值的货币
That is a currency that never tanks.
嗯太糟了
Well, too bad.
你别想那么简单就摆脱这里
You're not getting out of here that easy.
总有一天我会鼓起勇气拥抱你
One of these days, I'm gonna work up the courage to hug you.
乡亲们我刚从法国回来
Folks, I just got back from France,
在那我感受到了"屁的熏陶"
where I had "fart blanche."
你知道的我会第一个这么说...
You know, I'll be the first to say it...
她很不错啊
She pretty good. [ Laughs ]