杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl S05E16
Part 4
Nov. 20, 2020, 3:19 p.m.
Schmidt threw it away.
施密特把披萨扔掉了
What is going on here?
你们这是在做什么
Okay, um...
好吧 呃...
I had a sex dream about Nick.
我做了个关于尼克的春梦
Let me back up.
容我倒带一下
Last night, you asked me about this helmet.
昨晚 你问过我关于这个头盔的事
Sorry. Let me fast forward.
抱歉 再往前说
The helmet's stuck on my head.
这头盔卡在我头上了
Look, I know this is a lot to ask,
听着 我知道你满肚子疑惑
but is there any way, you could just trust me
但当我告诉你那只是个愚蠢的春梦的时候
when I tell you that it was just a stupid sex dream.
我只希望你能够相信我
Okay, yes. Yeah, no. I trust you.
好吧 没问题 我相信你
Thank you.
谢谢
But right now, my parents are expecting us.
但现在 我的父母正等着见我们
So, you know, a lot of kids come into the hospital
有很多小孩因为头上卡了东西
with stuff stuck on their head.
被送到医院
Do you guys have a screwdriver or a hammer?
你们有螺丝刀或是锤子吗
Oh, uh, we can't break it 'cause...
我们不能把头盔弄坏 因为...
Nick's dad gave it to him.
这头盔是尼克爸爸送他的
Right. Uh, well...
好吧 那算了
I have to go meet my parents, so I'll call you tomorrow.
我得去见我父母了 明天我打电♥话♥给你
What are you doing out here, man?
你在待在外面做什么
I'm sorry I got us into this, Winston.
抱歉把你卷进来了 温斯顿
That frickin' cat's a genius. Yeah.
那喵星人真是个天才 没错
I don't want to humiliate your cat.
我不想让你的猫受辱
I care about Furguson. I don't want...
我关心弗格森 我不想...
I don't want that poor thing to be humiliated.
我不想那可怜的小东西被羞辱
I can't imagine his self-esteem level already.
我无法想象他的自尊心该受伤到什么地步
It's got to be very low.
一定低到谷底了
Through the frickin' roof, the self-esteem.
去他妈的自尊心
Don't worry about Furguson, okay?
别担心弗格森 好吗
Okay, I can't do this anymore.
我没法再继续下去了
Are we talking about Furguson, or are we talking about you?
我们是在讨论弗格森 还是在讨论你
We're talking about me, okay? I knew it.
我们是在讨论我 好吗 我就知道
Furguson is me. Patches is Tripp, all right?
弗格森是我 小补丁是崔普 好吗
I knew... we've been dancing around that all day.
我知道 哑谜都打一天了
Can we please go? I haven't eaten anything in six hours.
我们能走了吗 我已经六小时没吃东西了
You know what? No.
你知道吗 不行
Patches may know a lot of tricks,
小补丁也许会许多小把戏
but you know how Furguson's gonna get Aly?
但你知道弗格森是如何追到艾丽的吗
I think you're getting lost, Winston, but keep going.
我觉得你跑偏了 温斯顿 但继续说
He's gonna keep trying, okay?
他坚持不懈 好吗
He's never gonna give up.
他从不轻易放弃
That's his trick.
这才是他的小把戏
Now come on, man. Let's get back in there.
现在 我们进去吧
Come on.
来吧
Come on. All right.
来嘛 好吧
Let's go. Yeah, no. Let's do this.
我们走吧 没错 我们要这么做
Let's go.
我们走吧
What are you guys doing here?
你们来这做什么
Wait a second.
等一下
You're not auditioning that housecat, are you?
你们不会是来给家猫试镜的吧
Oh, that is exactly what I'm doing.
那正是我们来此的原因
Tripp, can I borrow that catnip oil just for a sec?
崔普 能借下你的猫薄荷精油吗
Sure, but I think you know very well
没问题 但我想你一定明白
it's not going to help you in there.
这不会对你有什么帮助的
We'll see about that.
我们等着瞧
Oh, my God.
我的老天
That stuff is so concentrated. What are you doing?
那精油是高度浓缩的 你搞什么
It looks like Patches is gonna have a little trouble
看来小补丁遇到麻烦
concentrating on her audition.
不能集中注意力试镜了
God save me.
神啊救我
Furguson, avenge me!
弗格森 记得替我报仇
Avenge me!
替我报仇
I need a straw.
我需要吸管
Ugh, I should be charming the pants off
此刻我本该用我的魅力
Sam's parents right now.
彻底征服萨姆的父母
Jess.
杰茜
We're gonna break it.
我们要把头盔撬开
But what about your dad?
但这是你♥爸♥爸送你的啊
Look, it sucks to admit,
听着 虽然很难承认
but Sam's a really good guy with above average handsomeness.
但萨姆确实是个好人 他颜值高于平均水平
And he's above six feet tall, which I know means a lot to you.
而且身高一米八 我知道那对你而言很重要
And he makes you happy, and so...
而且他让你很快乐 所以...
...I think it's time for me to
我想我是时候
stop coming in between you guys.
不再阻挠你们俩了
Let's do this. Let's have a little bit of fun, huh?
来吧 我们来找点乐子吧
I will be going on the count of three.
倒数三下
Okay.
好吗
One, two, three, four, fi...
一二三四五...
What are you doing?
你干嘛呢
You never go on three.
不能在数到三的时候动手
You want to catch the patient off guard.
得趁着病人放松警惕
It's less scary that way.
这样就没那么吓人
Everybody knows it. It's just a doctor trick.
这谁都知道 医生的小窍门
Nick. So this time I am going on three.
尼克 这次我会数到三的时候动手
One, two, three, four... Do it!
一二三四... 锤吧
So this is the famous Patches.
这位是有名的小补丁
No. I am...
不 我是...
Winston L'andre Bishop
温斯顿·安德烈·毕夏普
and this is:
这位是
the king of cats.
众猫之王
Lover of mats.
地毯之主
No friend of rats.
老鼠劲敌
The kitty from Angel City,
来自天使之城的小猫
Furguson Michael Jordan...
弗格森·迈克尔·乔丹...
Bishop.
毕夏普
He just, poof...
他就那么...噗...
I'm gonna try to settle him down. And disappeared.
我来安稳他一下 ...消失了
Oh, my God, he's singing to the cat.
我的天哪 他在对猫唱歌♥
Come on. He's singing to the cat.
来 他在对着猫唱歌♥
Let's get out of here.
我们走吧
It's okay. We're here. We're here.
没事的 我们到了 我们到了
Okay, Patches is here.
小补丁到了
I was four steps away from freedom
就差四步之遥我就自♥由♥了
and I fell.
然后我摔倒了
Oh, they were on me, and they traversed me.
他们都扑上来了 遍布全身
It was like I was their city
我就像是他们的城市
and they were all rushing to work.
全都在我身上忙活着
May I just please take a moment with Patches?
请我容跟小补丁缓一缓
She needs a, a moment to center herself.
她需要一点时间集中精神
She almost OD'd on catnip.
她差点吸猫薄荷过量致死
Forget about Patches.
别管小补丁了
You should represent more cats like Furguson.
你应该推荐更多像弗格森这样的猫
What? What? You were laughing at him.
什么 什么 你刚刚还嘲笑他来着
He's an original.
他可独特了
Makes Patches look like a Culkin brother.
小补丁看起来就跟卡尔金兄弟一样
What?!
什么
It's hard to celebrate this moment
有这么多猫毛在嘴里
with so much cat hair in my mouth.
真是很难庆祝这一刻啊
You did it, buddy.
你成功了 伙计
Really? Really? Now you're gloating?
不是吧 这就开始膨胀了
Huh? Winston? Ah.
温斯顿
Do you have to be such a dick?
你非得这么混♥蛋♥吗
I mean, you're already so intimidating.
你已经这么有威胁了
Do you have to go out of your way to actually get at me?
你还非得出格地针对我吗
Intimidating?
有威胁
Aly talks about you all the time, obviously.
艾丽总是一个劲地说你
You're a cop. You're a hero.
你是个警♥察♥ 是个英雄
Last weekend, I went to a turtle's birthday party.
上个周末 我去参加了一只乌龟的生日派对
杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl
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