废柴联盟（2009）

Community S04E12

Part 1 Oct. 20, 2020, 9:51 a.m.

Shirley, did you ever date Roger Ebert?
雪瑞你和罗杰·埃伯特约过会吗
Excuse me? Nothing.
你说什么没事
Britta, did you ever take pictures of your feet
布雷塔你有没有拍过自己的脚
and post them on the internet for money?
然后传到网上来赚钱
Sha-ha! No.
切木有
Guys, this history final is going to be killer.
同学们这次历史课期末考试会很难
We have to study.
我们得好好学
It's no fair professor Cornwallis
康沃利斯教授又变得这么死板
turned all hard-assed again.
真不公平
Lucky Pierce.
皮尔斯真走运
Donating his kidney to Gilbert to get out of it.
捐了个肾给吉尔伯特然后就脱离苦海了
I never thought he'd be that generous.
我从没想过他会那么大方
Although, he did seem disappointed
不过他似乎挺失望
that the operation didn't involve sleeping with a Russian woman,
因为手术不包括上俄♥罗♥斯♥妹子
then waking up in a bathtub full of ice.
醒来后躺在满是冰块的浴缸里
Guys!
同学们
History!
历史
I am studying history.
我在学习历史
I'm studying our history.
我在学习我们的历史
Abed! Nobody bite.
阿布蒂都闭嘴
We agreed no biting.
我们说好了不准闲聊
But, Jeff, it's a graduation gift.
但是杰夫这可是毕业礼物
You see, on the surface we seem like just a group of people
表面上我们只是一群有着不同人生背景
from diverse backgrounds who have become unlikely friends.
不太可能成为朋友的人
But according to my research,
但根据我的研究
our paths have crossed many times.
我们有过很多交集
We were destined to meet.
我们注定要遇见彼此
Like a team of superheroes.
就像是超级英雄大组队
This is our origin story.
而这就是我们的缘起故事
And here...We...Go.
又...来...了
Abed, we don't have origin stories.
阿布蒂我们没有什么缘起故事
We have lives.
我们有正经日子过
Well, at least...
至少
Yep, just me.
就我一个人有
So you're saying we're all connected
所以你是说我们之间的联♥系♥
like the classic french film trilogy
就像经典的法国电影三部曲
Bleu, Blanc, Rouge?
《蓝》《白》《红》一样吗
No, like something more accessible.
不比那个更容易
Like Unbreakable.
就像《惊心动魄》
Abed, I know it's disappointing to you,
阿布蒂我知道这会让你失望
but we're not superheroes.
但我们都不是超级英雄
This is the real world, not some comic book adventure.
这是现实世界而不是某本漫画书里的冒险
I've done it. I've infiltrated the school.
我做到了我已经成功渗入了学校
I've learned its secrets.
我发现了其中的秘密
I've gained everyone's trust.
我取得了所有人的信任
And now, on the anniversary of my empire's destruction,
现在在我帝国覆灭一周年之际
Vengeance will be mine.
静待我的逆袭吧
No, vengeance will be ours.
不是我俩的逆袭
Okay, can you stop that? It really creeps me out.
你能别这样了吗吓死人了
I'm sorry. Just really love this thing.
抱歉只是我真的很喜欢这玩意
Skymall.
天猫
I've been doing exhaustive research
我一直努力调查清楚
into origin of our lives.
我们各自人生的缘起
Once I find the last one or two missing pieces,
只要找到最后一两块遗失的碎片
I'll have conclusive proof that we were all destined to meet.
我就有证据证明我们注定要遇见彼此
This is how we're all connected.
这是我们怎样和彼此产生联♥系♥的
I call it the crazy quilt of destiny
我称之为“命运碎片拼图”
mainly because the loom of fate was already taken.
主要是因为"命运织布机"已经被用过了
Really?
嘛
Look.I don't care what tricks or nonsense you have
听着我不管你剪贴簿里有什么花样
in your scrapbook, Martha Stewart,
或鬼东西玛莎·斯图尔特[美国富商]
But there's no way you're gonna get me to believe
但你绝不可能让我相信
there's some outside force controlling my destiny.
会有某股外力控制着我的命运
And I think you used that particular phrasing
我觉得你用那种独特的措辞
because I know you've seen Star Wars.
是因为我知道你看过《星球大战》
Everybody's seen Star Wars.
大家都看过《星球大战》
Yes, but you first saw it when it was re-released in 1982
没错但你第一次看是在1982年
at the Greendale Palladium at 4:15 in the afternoon.
下午4点15在格林德尔女神影院的重播
And it was the best time you ever had with your father.
那是你和你♥爸♥度过的最美好的时光
How did you know that?
你是怎么知道的
You keep this ticket stub in your wallet.
你在钱包里留着这张票根
Abed, you can't...
阿布蒂你不可以
Give it back!
快还我
Our story begins in the distant mists of a lost era:
我们的故事发生在迷失时代的遥远迷雾中
2008.
2008年
I know you're all wondering how I do it.
我知道你们都想知道我是怎么做到的
How do I balance straight As, extracurriculars,
我是怎样做到三好学生课外活动
and Israeli folk dancing every Friday night?
每周五晚的以色列民族舞
It's a simple matter of organization,
这不过是简单的组织能力
dedication, and...
奉献和
and we're back!
继续来
Then I drink your milkshake.
那我就喝你的奶昔
Ah, that will never get old.
这句话永不过时
You guys gotta see my Juno.
记得去看我在朱诺网的个人主页
Hey, Troy.
你好特洛伊
So I heard you weren't doing that great in Algebra,
我听说你代数没考好
and you know, if you need a tutor for math,
如果你想找人辅♥导♥数学
I'd be happy to help.
我很乐意帮忙
I'm being recruited by colleges to play football.
已经有大学录我去打橄榄球了
I don't have time for math.
我没空学数学
The only thing that matters to me are statistics.
对我来说只有统计数据才有意义
That's also a type of math.
那也算数学的一种
But we already knew I went to high school with Troy,
但我们都知道我和特洛伊读同一所高中
and it's not like he even remembered I existed.
但他对我根本没印象
Yeah, I don't remember her at all.
对我完全不记得她
We should probably drop this.
我们还是换个话题吧
Wait, where's Pierce on this chart?
等等皮尔斯在表上的什么地方
His contribution to the group has already been noted.
他对学习小组的贡献已经为人所知
Pierce Hawthorne. Fixture at Greendale. Unavoidable.
皮尔斯·霍桑格林德尔NPC 避无可避
Hey, is that a sad face? I wouldn't know.
这是个哭脸吗我不知道
You have to look deeper. Here. Take this, for example.
你得继续看给比如这个
It's a receipt I found in the back
这是我在感恩节时
of Shirley's sock drawer on Thanksgiving.
在雪瑞放袜子的抽屉后面发现的收据
You went in my bedroom for some comic book thing?
你为了漫画书什么的还进过我房♥间
Oh, no, my feet were cold. Ah, here.
不当时是我脚太冷给
You should probably wash those.
你最好把它们洗洗
Discovering the receipt was dumb luck,
发现收据纯属运气
but it proves that we were at the mall
但这证明我们同一天
on the exact same day.
都去过商场
Shirley, do remember what you bought for $54
雪瑞你还记得你在爱情小屋
at the love hut?
花了54刀吗
What? Hmm? No.
什么不记得
So excited about tonight, honey.
我对今晚很兴奋亲爱的
Uh-huh. It's been too long
对我们好久没有
since we had adult time without the kids.
抛下孩子自己享受成人时光了
Well, I may have an anniversary surprise for you too.
我也给你准备了一份周年纪念惊喜
Well, I'm in public, but, uh...
我在公共场合不过
You know you gonna get it, right?
你懂的吧
You gonna get it!
你懂的
So we were at the mall on the same day.
这么说我们那天都在商场
Unbreakable.
《惊心动魄》
Mail call.
送信了
That's all right. Won't be needing it today.
没关系的今天不用了
But Kevin always takes the mail.
但每次都是凯文送信
Well, today's mail's kind of important.
今天的信件很重要
It's the day that I send in Greendale's lease renewal.
今天是我递交格林德尔续租文件的日子
Lease re-new-al?
续租
It's a critical document.
是很重要的文件
See, Greendale sublets our land from the Arapaho nation.
格林德尔是阿♥拉♥巴霍族转租过来的
Miss a renewal and faster than you can say "Wounded knee,"
要是忘记续租一眨眼