神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S08E08

Part 2 Sept. 5, 2021, 12:03 p.m.

多亏他在油管上痛骂美国冰球联盟
thanks to his YouTube rants about the NHL.
这里是《纽约岛人队杂谈》
This is "Islanders Talk,"
今天的主题是"冰球可以有女粉丝吗"
and today's topic: can hockey have female fans?
总之他不是什么好东西
Yeah, he's not a good person.
总之这些视频是在他的"男人窝"
Anyway, those videos are taken in the "Man cave"
也就是奥沙利文的地下室拍的
in O'Sullivan's basement,
所以他的电脑应该在那
so that's gotta be where his laptop is.
我和霍特会潜入他的房♥子把它拿出来
Holt and I will be infiltrating his house and retrieving it.
怎么才能不被他发现呢
How are you gonna get past him?
他不会在家
He won't be home.
我们会利用他的一个弱点把他引出来
We're gonna lure him out using his one weakness.
比利·乔尔稀有纪念品拍卖♥♥会
Rare Billy Joel memorabilia sale?
听着还不错
Oh, that's nice, dear.
奥沙利文会遇到一位前巡回乐队管♥理♥员♥
O'Sullivan will meet with an ex-roadie
名叫杰罗尼莫·罗德里格斯
named Geronimo Rodriguez,
是泰瑞·杰弗兹的卧底身份
who will actually be an undercover Terry Jeffords,
也是我们这方的比利·乔尔超级粉丝
our resident Billy Joel superfan.
就那一次
It was one time.
你只看到过一次我对口型唱《上城女孩》
You caught me lip-synching to "Uptown Girl" One time.
不他就是你最爱的歌♥手大家都知道
Nope, he's your favorite singer; everybody knows it.
你也是唯一一个
And you're the only one
没和奥沙利文打过交道的人
O'Sullivan hasn't interacted with.
如果他把你问住了桑迪亚哥会在附近
If he stumps you, Santiago will be nearby,
用耳麦告诉你比利·乔尔的知识
feeding you Billy Joel facts into your ear.
你们要让他抽不开身
You guys need to keep him busy
然后用一个假的纪念品取他的指纹
and then use a piece of fake memorabilia to get a fingerprint
这样我们就能解锁他的电脑了
we can use to unlock his laptop.
-我♥干♥什么 -你查尔斯还有斯卡利留在这
- What am I doing? - You, Charles, and Scully will be here,
分散凯文的注意力确保他不知道霍特在工作
distracting Kevin and making sure he doesn't know Holt's working.
谁来负责切达呢
And who will be on Cheddar duty?
我们不能用骨头吸引它的注意力吗
I mean, can't we just distract him with a bone?
用骨头
Bone?
-你说骨头 -是啊
- Bone? - Yeah.
竟然说用骨头
Bone?
切达又不是街上的老鼠
Cheddar's not some street rat.
-这办法肯定行不通 -行得通
- This is never gonna work. - Yes, it will.
给我90分钟我保证
Just give me 90 minutes, and I promise
我会让你及时赶回来说结婚誓词的
I will get you back in time for your vows.
好吧但只要出了一点状况我就终止行动
Fine, but if there are any complications, I pull the plug.
这场婚礼太重要了
The ceremony is too important.
不能让凯文发现我们的行动
Kevin cannot find out what we're up to.
他不会的我保证
He won't, I promise.
雷蒙德
Raymond?
你们在这里干嘛
What are you all doing in here?
帕拉塔在看黄♥片♥
Peralta's watching porn.
-什么 -什么
- What? - What?
帕拉塔在看一部叫
Peralta's watching a handyman
"杂务工修好老旧门后狂♥操♥客人"的片子
repair a squeaky door and then fuck his customer.
这是真的吗杰克
Is that true, Jake?
是的
Yes.
我只能说我不意外
I wish I could say I was surprised.
-我就说拿这个作掩护很好吧 -对我不好啊
- Told you it was a great cover. - Not for me.
好了如果我们想不被奥沙利文的妈妈发现
Okay, if we wanna get past O'Sullivan's ma,
我们需要卧底用的身份
we need undercover personas.
你就是麦克斯韦·麦克斯韦
I'm thinking you will be Maxwell Maxwell,
一个花♥花♥公♥子♥ 秘密行动专员
international playboy and black ops specialist.
风流韵事遍布全球各地
He'd had affairs on every continent,
但真正与他相伴的只有危机
but his true mistress is danger.
我以为你已经吸取教训
I thought you learned your lesson
不把工作变成拍电影了
about turning police work into movies.
是啊但这是一部关于改革的电影
Yeah, I did, but this is a movie about reform.
这不是你会想看的电影吗
I mean, isn't that a movie you'd wanna see?
我唯一想看的电影
The only movie I wanna see
叫《苔藓的世界》
is called "The World of Mosses."
是一部讲世界各地苔藓的纪录片
It's a documentary about the world of mosses.
听着就难看
It sounds bad.
我们要扮成
Now, we will go in dressed
燃气公♥司♥的雇员米奇和亨利进去
as gas company employees named Mitch and Henry.
至少让我当亨利吧
Ugh. At least tell me I'm Henry.
你好女士我们是燃气公♥司♥的
Hello, ma'am. We're from the gas company.
我叫...
My name is...
米奇
Mitch.
好了我们就用这个取奥沙利文的指纹
Okay, this is how we'll get O'Sullivan's print.
速干型牙科用树脂
fast-drying dental resin.
奥沙利文摸到之后
O'Sullivan touches this,
留下指纹我们用模具
leaves an imprint, and we have a mold,
做一根假的手指
Which we use to make a fake finger
可以骗过99%的生物扫描仪
that will fool 99% of biometric scanners.
-还不错吧 -不得不说
- Pretty sweet, right? - I gotta say,
我本以为霍特退休会击垮你但你没事耶
I thought Holt retiring would crush your mood, but it hasn't.
等等
Wait.
-霍特要退休了吗 -你应该知道了吧
- Holt's retiring? - You knew that.
他说过等你把改革方案交了就告诉你
He said he would tell you when you handed in your reform proposal,
你已经交了所以他告诉你了
and you handed it in, and he told you.
不他没有
No, he didn't.
好吧那我刚告诉你了
Okay, well, then I just told you.
但你还是接受得很好啊
But you're still taking it well.
艾米
Amy?
艾米
Amy!
奥沙利文刚发了信息
O'Sullivan just texted.
他马上就到了你得藏起来
He'll be here in three. You gotta hide!
我要像抬家具一样把你抬走了可以吗
I'm just gonna pick you up and carry you like furniture, okay?
注意凯文在你六点钟方向
Look alive. Kevin's on your six.
-你知道雷蒙德在哪吗 -我知道
- Do you know where Raymond is? - Yes, I do.
他在...
He's, um...
拜托斯卡利想点说辞
Come on, Scully. Think of something.
想点说辞这是什么意思
Think of something. What does that mean?
是切达干的
Cheddar did it.
切达我知道你想让我们选另一款花瓶
Cheddar, I know you wanted us to go with the other vase.
我和你的审美观不同
I have a different aesthetic sense than you,
但今天是我的大喜之日
and it's my day.
不好意思让你们见笑了我去拿扫帚
Sorry you had to witness that. I will get a broom.
斯卡利跟着他
Scully, tail him.
这应该够他忙一会了
Well, that should keep him busy for a bit.
干得漂亮
That was smart,
但我觉得不能对切达太过分
but I don't think we should mess with Cheddar too much.
为什么它是只动物
Why not? He's an animal.
动物报复心很强的罗莎
Animals can be very vengeful, Rosa.
-你是在说警督 -我说的就是
- Is this about Lieutenant-- - Of course it's about
-花生酱警督 -我就知道
- Lieutenant Peanut Butter. - Yeah.
这就是主管道的开关
So here's the shutoff to the main line.
非常感谢女士
Thank you very much, ma'am.
好了要去地下室
Okay, to get into the basement,
我们就得吸引她的注意
we're gonna have to distract her,
我是这么想的
so here's what I'm thinking.
让麦克斯韦·麦克斯韦施展魅力
Maxwell Maxwell turns on the charm.
解开你的衣服然后说
Unbutton your jumper and say,
"煤气管道最大的问题就是...
"The thing about gas lines is,
气压会不断累积又累积
The pressure builds and builds
只需要一点... 释放"
and it just needs a little...release."
你不需要发出那种声音
You don't have to make that sound,
但如果我是你的话就一定会
but if I were you, I definitely would.
我们不会讨论什么释放
No one will be talking about release
或者发出鼠类分娩时的叫声
or making the sound of a rodent in labor.
明明是性感的呻♥吟♥ 但是你说得对
It was a sensuous moan, but fair enough.
我们只需要拿到电脑
We just have to get the laptop
然后我就可以回到凯文身边
so I can get back to Kevin.
你只要接近她然后说...
You will simply approach her and say...
女士我需要检查一下地下室的热水器
Ma'am, I need to check your water heater in the basement
确保煤气管道没有发生泄露或堵塞
to make sure there's no leaks or blockages to the gas line.