神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S08E02

Part 2 Aug. 16, 2021, 11:09 a.m.

Oh, Kevin, what a surprise!
你们为什么在我的房♥子里
Why are you all in my house?
雷蒙德
Raymond?
凯文你在这干什么
Kevin? What are you doing here?
我的食用大♥麻♥上劲了
Ha, my edibles just kicked in.
凯文怎么说的一切都还好吗
What did Kevin say? Is everything okay?
不好
No.
我们刚刚吵了个你死我活
We just had a knock-down, drag-out fight.
我的日历上标着湖边小屋是空的
My calendar had the Lake House as free.
奇怪我的写着没被占用
Strange. Mine had it as unoccupied.
看起来我们陷入了僵局
Well, it seems we're at an impasse.
我觉得更像是走进了绝路
I would call it more of a deadlock.
他总能想到这么巧妙的反驳
He gets in such good zingers.
他开车累了
He's tired from driving,
所以他准备在这过一夜然后明天早上回去
so he's staying the night and going back in the morning.
这不是挺好
Well, that could be good.
或许你们两个可以在一起待一会
Maybe you guys can spend some time together.
我们都同意要保持距离
We've agreed to keep our distance
而且我们两个任何人
and issue a verbal warning
进任何区域前都会先口头提醒
anytime one of us is about to enter the room.
雷蒙德·霍特准备进入厨房♥
Raymond Holt entering the kitchen!
杰克这可不妙
Jake, this is bad.
雷蒙德·霍特准备进入第二坐室
Raymond Holt entering the second sitting room.
试试看呗
Okay, just give it a shot.
他们两个已经分开了情况已经不能再糟了
They're already separated, it can't get any worse.
-这是个很好的观点 -谢谢你罗莎
- It's a really good point. - Thank you, Rosa.
她已经嗨到天上去了
She's high as hell.
这也是一个很好的观点
That's also a really good point.
该死罗莎
Damn it, Rosa!
查尔斯你呢你是我最好的朋友
Charles, what about you? You're my best friend.
我♥干♥什么你都会支持我
You support me in everything I do.
或许我没同意你的这个事实
Oh, maybe the fact that I'm not on board
是这个想法很糟糕的一个象征
is a sign that it's a really bad idea.
不你不知道为什么变心了这是唯一的解释
No, you've changed somehow, that's the only explanation.
大家来嘛我这个计划这么棒
Guys, come on, I've got a great plan here.
-没人参与吗 -坚决不会
- No one wants in? - Absolutely not!
53秒之后
告诉我你计划是什么我要参与
Tell me the plan. I want in.
什么认真的吗
What? You do?
当然泰瑞喜欢爱情
Yeah. Terry loves love.
那你刚才为什么不支持我一下
Then why didn't you back me up in there?
因为泰瑞也喜欢骑墙观察
Because Terry also loves hedging.
泰瑞喜欢骑墙观察头一回听说啊
Terry loves hedging? That's new.
不这是经典泰瑞
No, it's classic Terry.
我经常在最后一刻之前两面都讨好
Look, I always play both sides till the last possible minute,
是个人都知道
everyone knows that.
这根本不公平所有人都为难我
That's not fair. Everyone's so hard on me.
你得先公开表示支持我的计划
I want a public show of support for my plan.
做不到怎么说呢
Can't do it. Look, I don't know
这哪有什么难理解的呢
what's so tough for you to understand here.
我喜欢你的奸计我想参与进来
I love the scheme, I wanna be a part of it,
但是我觉得会失败
but I think it's gonna fail,
所以我不想让别人认为我参与过
and I don't want people to think I was a part of it.
好吧有总比没有强
Fine, I'll take what I can get.
太棒了
Yes!
该死这些遮光窗帘
Damn it, these blackout curtains
根本遮不住光
don't keep the light out. Ugh!
母婴用品点的店员我可真是被你骗惨了
You screwed me on this, Shannon from Buy Buy Baby!
你知道吗艾米麦克睡不着觉
You know, Amy, Mac's issues with sleeping
可能不是屋里有光
might not be the light in the room,
可能是你的心中无光
it might be the darkness in your heart.
-你再说一遍 -对不起太狠毒了
- Excuse me? - Sorry, that was mean.
我就是想诗意一点
I was trying to be poetic.
在哄婴儿的时候
It's important to be mindful
一定要注意你周围散发的能量
of your energy when you're with an infant.
相信我我算是一个与生俱来的母亲
Trust me, I'm sort of a natural mother.
与生俱来的母亲去你X的
Yeah, natural mother.
你在那里多久了
How long have you been there?
我一点头绪都没有
Oh, man, I have no idea.
-有人跟踪你吗 -没有
- Hey, were you followed? - Nope.
我保证他们绝对不知道我在跟你合作
I promise, they have no idea I'm working with you.
泰瑞你看见杰克了吗
Terry, have you seen Jake?
没
Uh, no.
那个白♥痴♥估计去搞他愚蠢的奸计去了
That idiot's probably off working his dumb plan.
他是真的蠢
He's so stupid.
你知道吗霍特和我没炒他鱿鱼的唯一原因
You know, the only reason Holt and I haven't fired him
是我们担心他会把自己蠢死
is that we're worried that he'll kill himself.
-听起来有点过了 -我跟你说过
- Seems a little excessive. - I told you.
我不想被人知道与这个计划有牵扯
I don't wanna be tied to this plan.
我现在冒险跟你坐在悬崖边看戏
Look, I'm out on a ledge for you,
而泰瑞讨厌悬崖边
and Terry hates ledges.
等一下所以你喜欢坐墙上但讨厌坐悬崖边吗
Wait, so you love hedges but hate ledges?
你这都是现编的吧
You're just making this up as you go.
不我没有那你举一个
No, I'm not. Name one time
我开心地坐悬崖边看戏的例子
you've ever seen me happy out on a ledge.
我现在想不出例子不代表...
I can't think of an example on the spot--
因为泰瑞讨厌悬崖边看戏
Because Terry hates ledges.
-告诉我你的计划 -好吧
- Now, come on, tell me the plan. - Fine.
第一步是让他们聚一起
Step one was getting them here together.
第二步重燃激♥情♥
Step two, reignite the passion.
你去搞定霍特警监
You'll handle Captain Holt.
长官你裤子上有东西
Sir, you have something on your pants.
我坐在了树液上了像个笨蛋一样
Huh, I've sat in some sap, like a sap.
至少你还能保持幽默
At least you have a sense of humor about it.
不是有意的我本来很生气
Not intentionally. I was upset
然后无意中说出文字游戏
and stumbled into accidental wordplay.
与此同时我来搞定凯文
Meanwhile, I will take care of Kevin.
凯文·柯兹纳正在进入厨房♥
Kevin Cozner, entering the kitchen.
你好啊凯文
Oh, hey there, Kev.
我正准备找点东西吃
I was just grabbing a bite to eat.
-我可以给你做点什么吗 -我不应该吃的
- Can I offer you something? - Well, I shouldn't,
但是今天已经够一团乱了放纵又如何
but today's been a fiasco, so what the hell.
我要喝点水当零食
I'll have a snack of some water.
凯文不知道的是
What Kevin won't know
他会从一个漏杯里喝水
is that he will be drinking from a dribble cup.
天哪
Oh, dear.
你还说我买♥♥斯宾塞礼物店的股票是疯了
And you said I was crazy to buy stock in Spencer's Gifts.
你就买♥♥一个他们家出的整人杯子
How does you buying one novelty cup
是能怎么帮助公♥司♥的股价啊
help the company's stock price?
它会增强市场的信心
It boosts confidence in the marketplace.
你一点也不懂买♥♥卖♥♥ 泰瑞
You just don't know anything about business, Terry!
我们弄脏了他们的外衣
Okay, so we've ruined their outfits.
那为什么会"重燃激♥情♥"
Why will that "Reignite the passion"?
因为这样就能强迫他们去换
Because it will force them to change
我小心翼翼放到他们
into clothes which I will have carefully placed
手提箱最上层的衣服了
at the top of their suitcases.
把他们变成对方眼中的性感尤物
Thus changing them both into a couple of thirst traps.
凯文·柯兹纳准备从主楼梯下楼
Kevin Cozner, preparing to descend the master stairca--
我看见你换上了你的高领针织衫
Oh, I see you've changed into your...mock turtleneck.
你换上了你的运动短裤
And you into your... exercise shorts.
感觉好脏啊你觉得呢
I feel dirty. You feel dirty?
我也感觉到了我爱这种气氛
I do. And I love it.
艾米第三轮比赛开始了
Oh, hey, Amy. Starting round three.
你想试试新墨西哥州辣炒猪肉味薯片吗
You wanna try New Mexico-style Chile Verde?
我现在腾不出手来斯卡利
Uh, my hands are kind of full here, Scully.
-我可以扔你嘴里 -什么
- I can toss it to you. - Wha--
斯卡利别冲我的孩子扔薯片
Scully, don't throw chips at my baby!
真不敢相信我要这么做了
I can't believe what I'm about to do.
-查尔斯我需要你的帮助 -我不会幸灾乐祸
- Charles, I need your help. - I'm not gonna gloat.
我只是为他能得到合适的照顾而高兴
I'm just happy he's getting the care he needs.
好吧在你成功把他哄睡之前
Okay, you might wanna be a little less cocky