黑色星期一

Black Monday S03E03

Part 1 June 23, 2021, 12:22 p.m.

《黑色星期一》前情提要
Previously on Black Monday...
我以为共和党全国委员会恨我
I thought you said the RNC hated me.
之前是直到你遭到了暗♥杀♥
They did, until your assassination attempt,
现在你的民调高过天际了
and now you are polling through the roof.
斯沃福德牧师你还是个禽兽
Pastor Swafford. You're still a monster.
我会毁了你
I will hang you out to dry.
老基斯现在终于掌管一切了
Old Keithy is finally in charge now.
你听命于我
You answer to me.
公♥司♥少了一百万美元我们知道是你
$1 million went missing. We know it was you.
我需要一份工作需要一个公♥司♥名
I need a job. I just need a company name
科科莫唱片公♥司♥
告诉我的假释官
to satisfy my parole officer.
他们现在告我证券欺诈
They're charging me with securities fraud.
我能解决这事
I can fix this.
你永远也解决不了这件事
You can never fix this.
我们应该把重心放到
We should just be focused on being
-情侣[一对] -朋友
- a couple... - Friends.
朋友
...of friends.
小道恩道恩道恩
Dawny, Dawn, Dawn.
我想出狱后的这个周末你一定又
So I'm pretty sure you spent another post-prison weekend
参加派对直到喝断片
partying till the break of you
你喝得太醉不吐就没法接电♥话♥
and are too hungover to pick up without throwing up.
但我真的需要告诉你件事
but I really need to tell you something,
大事
big,
比大事还要大重大消息
bigger than big, fucking huge.
接电♥话♥ 快接
Pick up. Pick up.
快接快接快接快接
Pick up. Pick up. Pick up. Pick up.
快接快接快接快接该死的
Pick up. Pick up. Pick up. Pick up. Fuck!
这个消息太重要不能留在你的答录机里
This news is way too big to leave on your machine,
但你真的应该第一个知道
but you really should be the first to know.
但我真的想当面告诉你
But I really wanna see your face when I tell you.
但我真的不希望你从别人那里听到
But I really don't want you to hear it from someone else.
该怎么办怎么办怎么办怎么办
Ooh, what to do, what to do, what to do, what to do,
怎么办怎么办我该怎么办
what to do, what to do. What should I do?
别再占用录音带了
Stop eating the whole fucking tape!
尊重一下录音带吧
Respect the fucking tape.
我想你来这里时我再告诉你吧
I guess I'll just tell you when you get here.
你最好快点来这里
Oh, and you better fucking get here fast
因为你的假释官来电说
'cause your parole officer called,
她现在要过来跟着你一整天
and she's coming by right now to shadow you all day.
-该死 -抱歉
- Fuck! - Sorry.
我可能该先说这个的
Probably should've led with that.
她听起来
She sounded like
真像个"臭婊♥子♥"
a real "See you next Tuesday, you fucking cunt."
See (C) you (U) next Tuesday
首字母缩写即为CUNT
等等我我做错了吗
Wait, did I... did I do that wrong?
不了谢谢
No, thanks.
该死
Shit.
-我 -来了[高♥潮♥]- I'm... - Coming!
消防出口楼梯
如果有人问我在这里工作好吗
If anybody asks, I work here, okay?
等等你现在在这里工作吗
Wait, you work here now?
把那句话的问号♥去掉混♥蛋♥
You take the question mark off that sentence, motherfucker.
我的假释官随时会到
My parole officer will be here any minute.
先生众议院筹款委员会主席
Uh, chairman of Ways and Means, sir,
-三点与您会面 -该死
- three o'clock. - Fuck.
你在跟谁打电♥话♥
Who are you talking to?
我只是在假装打电♥话♥ 白♥痴♥
Idiot, I'm just pretending.
-我是道恩·达西 -我是法夫议员
- Dawn Darcy. - Congressman Pfaff.
好吧
All right.
-那么 -我有什么可以帮你的
- Now... - How can I help you?
黑色星期一
第三季第三集
姐妹很高兴我的假释官是位亨莉埃塔
Girl, I am so glad my PO is a Henrietta
而不是亨莉你懂我意思吧
and not a Henry, if you know what I mean.
-我更喜欢亨莉这个名字 -当然
- I prefer Henry. - Totally.
没错不我是说你明白
Yeah, no, I just mean that you understand
女性在职场中会遇到怎样的困难
the struggle that the ladies face in the workplace.
所以我当首席执行官时只雇佣女性
That's why when I was CEO, I employed only women.
-除了我和韦恩 -没错雇佣少数族群
- Except for me and Wayne. - Ahh, yes, diversity hires.
在她从前的犯罪企业里
Takes great pride in her work
以她的工作为荣
at her prior criminal enterprise.
好吧你的工作区在哪里
Okay, now, where is your workstation?
对是的没错我实际上在这里
Oh, yes, yes, yes. I am actually right over here.
是我的雇员米茜
It is my girl, Missy.
米茜是我办公室的好闺蜜
Missy is my office BFF.
你在跟我说话吗
Are you talking to me?
贱♥人♥ 我就知道你不会有反应
Bitch, I know you not gonna act.
你知道我在跟你说话天啊她可真疯狂
You know I'm talking to you. Oh, my God, she is so crazy.
你可真疯狂你这个性感的小贱♥人♥
You are crazy, you sexy bitch, you.
好吧那这是你的桌子吗
Okay, so is this your desk?
是的这是我的桌子是我另一个家
Yes, this is my, well, my home away from home.
这是你的刺绣吗
So this is your needlepoint?
亚西尔之家
这是你的奖杯吗
And this is your trophy?
年度最佳混血炮♥友♥
这些都是你的避孕套吗
And these are your condoms?
米茜小贱♥人♥ 我对天发誓
Missy, bitch, I swear to God,
我会再次用空气♥枪♥打中你的眼睛
I'ma shoot you in your eye with a fucking BB gun again.
你玩得太过了
You play too much.
我说过我会揍爆你的胸
I told you I'ma punch you in your titties.
你又这样做我说过她很疯狂
You're at it again. I told you she was crazy.
不在科科莫公♥司♥ 我们有个传统
No, here at KokoMo Co, we have this thing we do
叫做"星期一团糟"
called Mix Up Mondays
在这天我们会互换彼此桌上的东西
where we switch everybody's shit off each other's desk,
而这个贱♥人♥就是罪魁祸首
and this bitch is the ringleader.
不这是有趣的星期一
No, it's Monday fun day.
实际上老蒙我的老板蒙罗就是这样叫的
That's what Mo, Mr. Monroe, my boss, calls it, actually.
-你们好 -香槟吗
- Hey, hey! - Oh, champagne?
不我从不碰这东西不是给我准备的
No, I-I never touch this stuff. Not for me.
这只是"星期一酩悦香槟" 你还能怎么办
It's just Moet Mondays. You know, what can you do?
所以这是"星期一团糟"和"星期一酩悦香槟"
So it's Mix Up Monday and Moet Monday
因为这是有趣的星期一
'cause it's Monday fun day.
-对 -尽管今天是星期二吗
- Yes. - Even though today is Tuesday?
这是我认为的那个人吗
Is that who I think it is?
是的这位是蒙罗先生
Yes. This is Mr. Monroe.
这位是我的假释官亨莉
And this is my parole officer, Henry.
-你好亨莉吗 -亨莉
- Hello. Henry? - Henry.
好吧亨莉
Okay, Henry.
-一字不差地记下这个 -好的
- Write this shit down verbatim. - Mm-hmm.
道恩·达西女士是最刻苦
Ms. Dawn Darcy is the most hardworking,
最诚实最"本垒打"的员工
honest, home run employee
我非常荣幸能和她一起工作
that I have ever had the honor to work with.
懂吗她是最棒的
Okay? She's the best.
最棒的员工最好的朋友
Best employee, but best friend ...
再说就奇怪了
Making it weird.
谢谢谢谢
Oh, thank you. Thank you.
我还要向你们介绍
And I also have to introduce you all
诺米·麦当娜女士
to Ms. Nomi Maldona.
她是轰动一时的歌♥唱巨星
She is a supernova singing sensation.
而且她刚刚
And she also happens to be
签约到科科莫唱片公♥司♥
our latest signing to KokoMo Co Records, so...
没错所以才开香槟
Yes, which explains the champagne better.
怪不得有香槟喝
Yeah, it explains the champagne.
还是你的未婚妻小蒙蒙
And, oh, I don't know, your fiancée, Momo.
哎呀忘记说了
Whoops, left something out.
我们要结婚了
We're getting hitched, y'all.
是啊快看
Yeah, look at that.
真美对吧
Beautiful, isn't it?
很不错对吧
It's nice, right?
-对恭喜 -谢谢
- Yes, congratulations. - Yeah.
好消息小拉
Good news, Lar.
将法夫时尚的厕纸减少到单层
By reducing Pfaffashions' toilet paper to single ply,
我们就能省下一笔钱