家有喜旺（2010）

Raising Hope S02E19

Part 1 Nov. 24, 2020, 1:31 p.m.

Give me that thing.
把那个给我
You color like a mental patient.
别跟个神经病似的乱涂
Maw Maw. If you continue to embarrass us,
奶奶你再瞎嚷嚷
we're going to start dropping you off at the Korean church again.
我们就把你扔回韩国教堂
She's a terrible drawer.
她画画真没天赋
She made Joseph all blue.
怎么能把约瑟涂成蓝的呢
And Mary's got furry monkey arms.
还给玛利亚个毛猴一样的手臂
So what?
那又怎样
Maybe she had hairy arms.
讲不定她手臂上真的很多毛
It's probably why she stayed a virgin.
所以才会万年老处♥女♥
Good morning.
各位早安
I'd like to mention
我想说一件事
that one of my Heaven's Helpers volunteers
我们天堂互助会的一名志愿者
did a wonderful job on beautifying
为教堂的景观美化
the church's landscaping.
做出了杰出的贡献
Here it comes.
等的就是这个
Does this face look humble?
你看我这样够谦卑吗
It's all a part of the Spring
这都是我所组织的
into Spring campaign that I organized.
春日有约项目的一部分
I'd like to recognize the parishioner
我想在此表彰这位为项目
who donated his time and talent for this project.
无私奉献时间与心力的教友
But...
但
he doesn't do it for the recognition.
他并非为名为利
None of my volunteers here do.
我们每位志愿者都是如此
They follow the example that I set.
他们以我为榜样
I don't do it for the glory.
而我做的一切不为荣誉
I do it for the Lordy.
只求对得起吾主
No. It's not about me,
掌声不是属于我一个人的
but thank you.
但谢谢各位
So you'll be happy to know
很高兴告诉大家
that I will run for another term
我将参选新一任
as chairperson of Heaven's Helpers.
天堂互助会主席一职
I'll formally accept my nomination next Tuesday,
下周二圣歌♥卡拉OK之后
right after Bible hymn karaoke.
我将正式接受提名
Are those pesos?
这给的是比索吗
Yeah.
没错
I won a bet from a gal at work. It's all she had.
我上班时赢来的这是那姑娘所有财产
Don't worry-- if Jesus turned water into wine,
别担心既然上帝能把水变成酒
I'm sure he can turn pesos into dollars.
把比索变成美钞也是小菜一碟
All right, Jimmy, come on.
好了吉米
It's time to put on your costume.
快换上戏服
Costume for what?
你们这是要干嘛
You'll think it's weird,
你肯定会觉得奇怪
but ever since we stopped getting the Sunday paper,
自从我家收不到周日特刊
we started making up and acting out our own funnies.
我们就自娱自乐
I don't really feel like doing the comics this morning.
我今天不太想玩过家家
Oh, come on, Burt.
别扫兴伯特
You know I've been waiting all week for this.
你知道我一直盼着这个呢
Yeah, I was waiting all week for a little
我也一整周都巴望着
acknowledgment for my church volunteer work.
教会表扬我为教堂做的贡献
I was even practicing all this.
表情我都排练好了
Sarah Louise is running for reelection.
萨拉·露易丝会继续参加改选
You should run against her.
你该参选跟她干一场
Then, when you're in charge,
一旦你当选
you can make sure everybody gets the credit they deserve.
你就能表扬所有的好人好事了
No way. Do not cross Sarah Louise.
别做梦别惹萨拉·露易丝
You remember what happened when Ernie Sawyer
还记得跟她对着干的欧尼·索伊吗
ran against her, and then he fell off the wagon?
戒酒的他后来马失前蹄了
She made him start drinking?
她让他又喝酒了
No, she scared the horses,
没她吓尿了他的马
and he flew off the back of the hayride.
害得他跌下了马车
He was drunk, though.
不过他当时是喝醉了
But they say that's what saved him.
大家都说他因此逃过一劫
Maybe I should run against her.
我要去竞选
It's time someone stood up to Sarah Louise.
是该有人站起来抵抗萨拉·露易丝
Hey. If you run against her,
要是你去竞选
I'll be your campaign manager.
我可以当你竞选经理人
But only if you let me go negative,
但你得让我采取激进手段
'cause I just don't think we can win on your accomplishments.
因为你的胜算实在不大
You know what?
知道吗
I was going to start with Beetle Bailey this week,
我这周本来想演《菜鸟从军记》
but I think you need to learn a very important lesson
但该让美国著名的小屁孩
from some of America's favorite kids.
给你上一堂课
Just give me five minutes to rewrite this week's script.
给我五分钟重写剧本
Okay.
好了
Is everybody ready?
准备好了吗
I really should be Marcie.
我应该演玛茜[史努比里的人物]
I'm the only one with an actual lesbian experience.
我是唯一有拉拉实战经验的
Maw Maw, I've told you before,
奶奶我跟你说了多少次
watching Ellen isn't considered a lesbian experience, okay?
看艾伦[女同主持人]的节目不算
Ready? Go.
准备开始
Come on, Charlie Brown.
快点查理·布朗[史努比的主人]
Do it. You'd be everyone's hero.
放手做吧你会成为全民英雄
Yeah, trust me, Charlie Brown.
没错相信我查理·布朗
You guys are right.
你们说得对
I think I can do it.
我也相信我可以做到
What's the worst thing that can happen?
失败了又怎样
This is exactly what will happen
这就是你跟萨拉·露易丝
if you run against Sarah Louise.
对着干的下场
Good grief.
额滴神啊
Well, I'd like to start the meeting, but, apparently,
其实我也想早点开始
Carl's sister is running late to pick him up.
但卡尔的姐姐还没来接他
Poor blind fellow.
可怜的阿瞎
Music's all he's got.
音乐是他的全部
And he's not as good as most blind musicians
但比起电视上的盲人音乐家
I've seen on TV.
他差远了
Hey, my ears work, okay?
我没聋好吗
As does my middle finger.
我的中指也很灵活
Poor thing.
可怜蛋儿
He's flipping the bird to a poster of Bethlehem.
他在向伯利恒[耶稣降生地]海报竖中指
Thanks, Virginia.
多谢提醒维吉妮亚
Oh, she's in the crosshairs now.
这次她中枪了
All right.
好了
Everybody saw it.
大伙儿都看到了
You can put it down, Carl.
你可以放下了卡尔
Tonight's first order of business
今晚的首要任务
will be to formally nominate candidates
就是正式提名新一任
for chairperson of Heaven's Helpers.
天堂互助会主席候选人
Put it down, Carl.
放下卡尔
Do it. Nominate me.
快提名我
No. It's a suicide mission.
才不这等于是自杀
Since I'm unopposed again...
既然我再次独孤求败
I nominate Burt Chance.
我要提名伯特·吉斯
Thank you, Carl.
够义气卡尔
Okay.
那好
Good for you, Burt.
好样的伯特
In two weeks, at the next meeting,
两周后的会议上
both of us will make brief speeches,
我们将作简短的竞选演讲
and all members in attendance will vote.
之后由出席的教友投出宝贵的一票
Sorry I'm late.
抱歉我来晚了
My mouthwash gave my Breathalyzer a false reading,
我的漱口水误导了酒精测试仪
so my car wouldn't start.
害我没法开车
Bye, Carl.
卡尔再见
He's good.
顺风耳啊
As some of you may have heard,
大家应该听说了
Carl's sister Gwen's moving away.
卡尔的姐姐格温要搬走了
Rehab.
去戒酒
Luckily for him, I stepped in.
他真该庆幸我伸出了援手
Next week, Heaven's Helpers will present Carl
下周天堂互助会将向卡尔赠予
with his very own guide animal.
一只属于他的导盲动物