公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation S05E20
Part 1
Jan. 27, 2024, 11:51 a.m.
嘿 我没找到那篇你教老年人性教育的文章
Hey. I didn't find the article about you teaching sex-ed to seniors,
但我找到了这个标着"老年性教育感谢便条"的文件夹
but I did find this folder labeled "Senior sex-ed thank you notes."
哦 别打开 里面有照片
Oh, don't open that. There's pictures in there.
哦 真的有照片
Oh! There are pictures.
有好多照片啊
There are lots of pictures.
你为啥没扔掉或者烧成灰啊
Why would you not throw these away or incinerate them?
因为所有的记忆都值得被记进编年史
Because every memory deserves to be chronicled.
即使是下垂的
Even the saggy ones.
我在整理一本剪贴簿
I am putting together a scrapbook
纪念我在市议会的第一年
commemorating my first year on the city council.
今年的时光飞驰得太快
This year whizzed by so fast.
还有太多我想做的事情了
There was so much more I wanted to do.
但时间对专注的人♥民♥公仆来说是无情而残忍♥的敌人
But time is the relentless and cruel enemy of the devoted civil servant.
实际上是我剪贴簿副标题中的一个
It's actually one of the sub-titles of my scrapbook.
Leslie Knope市议员 第一年 一本回忆的剪贴簿 旅程开始 或 时间对专注的人♥民♥公仆来说是无情而残忍♥的敌人
可能可以多完成点事情吧
Probably would've got more stuff done
要是没花那么多时间头脑风暴剪贴簿标题的话
if I hadn't spent so much time brainstorming scrapbook titles.
Ben和Leslie的休息日 我们去放松
Ben and Leslie's day off. Let's go relax.
等不及开始我们的休息了
I cannot wait for our day off.
但如果我们再多干一天
But what if we took a day on
呆在这然后搞点项目呢
and stayed here and worked on some projects?
听起来挺性感的 对吧 - 不
That sounds pretty sexy, right? - No.
Leslie 你一直不停工作 假日和周末也是
Leslie, you've worked nonstop. Holidays and weekends.
你就只是休一天而已 会对你有好处的
You're just gonna take a day off. It'll be good for you.
好吧 你很可爱 你也是对的
All right. You're cute. And you're right.
来吧 - 我们放松
Come on. - Let's relax.
嘿 April
Hey, April.
我接下来的19个半小时都不在
I'll be gone for the next 19 1/2 hours,
所以你能给我办公室里的植物浇水吗
so can you water my plants in my office?
实际上 我们都停水了
We are all out of water, actually.
我只能用滚烫的热牛奶了
I'll have to use boiling hot milk.
你真要那么做吗 - 是的
Are you really gonna do that? - Yes.
嗯 各位 呃 哇
Well, everybody. Um, wow.
和你们所有人共事是我的荣幸和快乐
It has been an honor and a pleasure to work with you all.
我在公园娱乐部度过的时间
The time I have spent at Parks and Rec
是我在政♥府♥这的工作中最开心的日子
have been the happiest days of my life here in the government.
我知道所有人都这么说 我真心希望我们能保持联♥系♥
And I know everyone says it, but I sincerely hope that we stay in touch.
现在他妈发生了啥啊
What the fuck is happening right now?
今天是我的最后一天了 Leslie
Today's my last day, Leslie.
我要退休了
I'm retiring.
啥 你为啥没告诉我们啊
What? Why didn't you tell us?
嗯 我不想小题大做
Well, I didn't want to make a big fuss.
虽然 天啊 我很肯定我提到过几次
Although, gosh, I'm pretty sure I mentioned it a few times.
S02E23 The Master Plan
2年前
哦天 他们要开始开人了 对吧
Oh, God. They're going to fire people, aren't they?
我只有两年就能拿到养老金了
Yeah, I am two years from my pension.
6个月前
你敢相信吗
Can you believe it?
离我退休只有六个月了
Only six months left until I retire.
哦
Ooh.
Jerry说了啥
What did Jerry say?
Jerry来过啊
Jerry was here?
一周前
嗯 这是我最后一"邹"了 哎唷
Well, this is my last weep. Oops.
我是说 "邹"
I mean, "weep."
"周"
Week.
哎呀
Jeez.
等等等等等等等 就等等
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Just wait.
所有人等等 好吧
Everybody wait. Okay.
虽然我们很想让这事儿发生
As much as we want this to happen,
我们不能让Jerry就此消失啊
we can't let Jerry just disappear.
我们总得怎么纪念一下
We have to commemorate this somehow.
说得没错
You're right.
Jerry 感谢你的付出
Jerry, thank you for your service.
再见
Good-bye.
谢了 Ron 那段演讲意义重大
Thanks, Ron. That speech means a lot.
好吧 嗯 我要走了 和其他老乡们告别
Okay, well, I am going to go and say good-bye to some other folks.
好 明天见了 Jerry
Okay, see you tomorrow, Jerry.
公园
与
游憩
公园
与
游憩
第5季 第20集
第5季 第20集
所以我们做完了你们所有的检查 一切看起来都很棒
So we ran all your tests, and everything looks great.
你可能是我们见过最健康的人类了
You might be the healthiest human being we've ever seen.
你的静息心率和百岁的乌龟一样
You have the resting heart rate of a 100-year-old tortoise.
是的 我经常听到这句
Yes, I get that a lot.
所以我童年的疾病--
So my childhood illness--
不可能传下去吧
there's no chance I would pass that on?
不是基因疾病 所以你完全不用担心
It wasn't genetic, so you shouldn't worry at all.
你完全有理由期待一个健康的孩子
You have every reason to expect a healthy child.
实际上 如果你想 你今天就可以提供样本
In fact, if you'd like, you can provide your sample today.
今天吗
Today?
就 今天的今天
Like, today, today?
这个今天 - 嗯 是的
This today? - Well, yes.
我是说 根据Ann的排卵日程表 时间没问题
I mean, the timing is right according to Ann's ovulation schedule.
除非有你必须等到下个月的理由
Unless there's a reason you'd like to wait till next month.
不
No.
没有
None.
另一个问题
One other question.
完全不相关的
Completely off topic.
我提供样本的日子是...
Would I be providing this sample...
今天吗
today?
我还在这里想着在市议会的第一年过得有多快
Here I am thinking about how fast my first year in city council has gone,
而Jerry已经被40年擦身而过而没有能展示的成就了
and Jerry has had 40 years whiz past him with nothing to show for it.
这是他档案里所有的东西--
This is everything in his file--
一张他得痛风的时候用的残疾人停车位贴纸
a handicapped parking sticker from when he got gout,
一次公园娱乐高尔夫车驾驶考试
a Parks and Rec golf cart driving exam
他还没过
which he failed,
一篇严厉的业绩审查
a scathing performance review.
我是说 为啥会有人这么刻薄啊
I mean, why would anyone be so mean?
哦 等等 是我写的
Oh, wait. I wrote this.
我坚持这个结论
I stand by it.
嗯 Jerry真不是那种高于或者等于平庸的人
Well, Jerry was never really the type to rise above mediocrity or to it.
我也是这么想的啊 但他开始的时候
That's what I thought, but when he started,
他也有很多梦想和目标的啊
he had a lot of dreams and goals.
我是说 看看他原来的入职表格
I mean, look at his original entry paperwork.
他想见到市长
He wanted to meet the mayor,
有一栋以他命名的楼
have a building named after him.
我就不能让Jerry一无所有地回家 回到空虚的生活
I just can't let Jerry leave here with nothing and go home to an empty life.
嗯 任何事我都可以帮忙
Well, I'll help with anything.
就保证我们做快点
Just promise we'll do it quickly.
我要做个通心粉奶酪披萨--
I'm making us a mac and cheese pizza for--
通心粉奶酪披萨吗 - 是啊
Mac and cheese pizza? - Yeah.
你要做那个啊 - 是啊
You're making that? - Yeah.
折磨Jerry是我在世界上最喜欢的事了
Torturing Jerry was my favorite thing in the world.
除了跟你亲热之外
After making out with you.
记得我们同时做这两件事吗
Remember when we did both at the same time?
真是让他不舒服啊
It made him so uncomfortable.
这是悲伤的一天
This is a sad day.
我们现在要开谁的玩笑了呢
Who are we gonna make fun of now?
不用担心
No need to worry.
我工作过的每一个地方都有过一个"Jerry"
Every place I've ever worked in has had a "Jerry."
当一个Jerry离开时
When one Jerry leaves,
办公室会自然选择一个新的Jerry来填补空缺
the office naturally selects a new Jerry to fill that role.
这是社会达尔文主义
It's Social Darwinism.
强者捕食弱者
The strong prey on the weak.
很快 你们中的一位会被无情地嘲弄
Soon, one of you will be ridiculed mercilessly.
啊 自然
Ah, nature.
好的 我的调任批准了
Okay. My transfer was approved.
所以现在开始 我是郡卫生局的一位雇员
So starting now, I am an employee of the County Health Board.
你不再是我的老板
You are no longer my boss,
我们可以在没有利益冲突的情况下生一个孩子了
公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation
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