公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation S05E09
Part 2
Jan. 27, 2024, 11:50 a.m.
嘿 你肯定有啊
Hey, you most certainly do.
他们不选你才奇怪呢
They'd be crazy not to vote for you.
哪个是Ron的啊 - 我也不知道
Which one is Ron's? - I don't know.
聪明 有趣 独♥立♥ 还性感啊
Smart, funny, independent, and sexy?
Diane Sawyer ABC电视台新闻主播
Diane Lewis吗 更像是Diane Sawyer
Diane Lewis? More like Diane Sawyer.
哇 Gergich家在干啥啊
Whoa! What is going on at the Gergiches?
哦天啊 Jerry在开圣诞派对
Oh, my God! Jerry's having a Christmas party!
不敢相信他居然没邀请我们
I can't believe he didn't invite us.
他怎么敢 我们对他做了什么啊
How dare he! What'd we ever do to him?
可能只请了家人吧
It's probably just family.
还有Ben和Chris
And Ben and Chris.
还有Ann 我都不知道她还认识Jerry的
And Ann. I didn't even know she knew Jerry.
哇 Gergich一家真的是全力以赴啊
Wow. The Gergiches really go all out.
这也太棒了
This is incredible.
嗯 这 真的 是我喝过最好的脱脂蛋奶酒
Mmm! This is literally the best non-fat eggnog I've ever had.
保持冷静 但我觉得你喝的就是普通的 全脂的蛋奶酒
Remain calm, but I think you just drank some of the regular, full-fat eggnog.
普通蛋奶酒
Chris 一杯不会要你命的
Chris, one cup won't kill you.
不会 但会正好增加440大卡
No, but it will add exactly 440 calories.
但你知道吗 我没事
But you know what? I'm fine.
你只活一次
You only live once.
嗯
Mmm!
我不知道你知不知道
I don't know if you know this,
但全脂的东西尝起来比脱脂的好太多了
but things with fat in them taste way better than things with no fat.
是啊 Chris-- 所有人都知道的
Yeah, Chris-- everybody knows that.
Ron 猜猜为啥我竖着大拇指 - 不
Ron, guess why my thumbs are up. - No.
因为我要给你我对Diane100%的认可
Because I'm giving you my 100% approval about Diane.
她对你很完美 她理解你
She is perfect for you. She gets you.
她现在正在吧台为你点了一杯纯的Lagavulin给你
She is at the bar right now ordering a Lagavulin neat for you.
我是说 她甚至忍♥受了这一切愚蠢无聊的木工玩艺儿
I mean, she's even putting up with all this stupid, boring woodworking stuff.
很抱歉 但 你们知道的 这也不是超级碗啊 伙计们
I'm sorry, but, you know, it's not the Super Bowl, guys.
我们消停一点
Let's take it down a notch.
无论如何 你得到我的批准了
Anyway, you have my approval.
我不需要你的批准
I don't need your approval.
但你得到了 - 不需要
But you have it. - Don't need it.
但你有了
But you got it.
这可能会变成
This could end up being
Ron Swanson这辈子最好的一晚
the best night in Ron Swanson's life.
我太 太为他高兴了--
I am so, so happy for him--
你们好啊 美丽的手工艺人们
Hello, you gorgeous craftsmen.
哇 看看这个房♥间啊
Wow, look at this room.
这么多木材 准备好被加工呢
So much wood, ready to be worked.
"这么多阴♥茎♥ 准备好被搞了"
见我娘的鬼了
Fuck me!
警报...警报 警报 警报
Alert... alert, alert, alert.
她来了 是吧
She's here, isn't she?
哦 嘿 Ron 真是巧合啊
Oh, hey, Ron. What a coincidence.
糟糕啊 我做梦都没想到你在这里啊
Gosh, I never dreamed you'd be here.
Tammy 这位是Diane
Tammy, this is Diane.
Diane 这块人形垃圾名叫Tammy
Diane, this is a piece of human garbage named Tammy,
也是我的前妻
who is also my ex-wife.
两次的前妻 我们结过两次婚
Twice ex-wife. We were married twice.
也离了两次
And divorced twice.
一切都结束了 他俩完全结束了
Everything is done. They are totally done.
Tammy 你在这干什么呢
Tammy, what are you doing here?
哦 我只是有点点东西需要被"钻"
Oh, I just have a little something I need to get drilled.
我能跟你聊会儿吗
Can I speak with you for a moment?
一切都好 我们就是聊会儿天
Everything's fine, we're just gonna chat.
你不是应该在图书馆 强迫别人借书吗
Shouldn't you be at the library, forcing people to borrow books?
Leslie 你和我都知道图书馆下午3点就关门了
Leslie, you and I both know that the library closes at 3:00 p.m.
当然是这样
Of course it does.
此外 我喜欢密切关注Ron
Besides, I like to keep tabs on Ron.
所以你能毁了他的生活吗
So you can ruin his life?
所以我可以和他玩耍
So I can have fun with him,
而有时候毁了他的生活也是一部分的话 当然
and sometimes ruining his life can be a part of that, sure.
这可能是情感护卫Leslie Knope迄今为止最艰难的挑战了
This may be the hardest challenge yet for Leslie Knope, emotional guardian.
我需要保护一对甜蜜情侣不受一个性♥爱♥狂魔图书馆员的侵害
I need to protect a sweet couple from a sex-crazed demon librarian
而她让我质疑自己不用"婊"字的立场
who makes me question my stance on using the "B" word.
我不知道 或许就这一次吧
I don't know, maybe just this once.
不 Leslie 忍♥住 忍♥住
No, Leslie, fight it. Fight it.
里面看起来好暖和啊
It looks warm in there!
暖和又开心
Warm and happy.
嗯 看看那个姜饼人啊
Mm, look at that gingerbread man.
啥 我没看到姜饼啊
What? I don't see any gingerbread cookies.
我说的是那个白皮健身哥们
I'm talking about that jacked-up, light-skinned dude.
NBA底特律活塞队球员
看起来像Blake Griffin
Look like Blake Griffin.
你们啊
You guys!
居然有自助餐 室内的
There's a buffet-- in the house!
我甚至不知道能那么做啊
I didn't even know you could do that!
我们需要闯进这个派对
We need to crash this party.
Ann 放我们进去
Ann, let us in.
我们走
Let's go.
哎呀 哎呀 哎呀
Well, well, well.
你们想来Jerry的聚会是吧
You want to come into Jerry's party?
为什么呢
And why is that?
我需要一个地方来生这个孩子 Ann
I need a place to deliver this baby, Ann.
它现在就出来了 我怀孕了
It's coming out of me right now. I'm pregnant.
这是个有爱的男人和有爱的家庭举办的有爱聚会
This is a lovely party thrown by a lovely man and his lovely family.
没给刻薄鬼留位置
There's no place for meanies.
哦 算了 我直接上
Aw, forget it, I'm coming in.
嗷
Ow!
别碰我啊 - 等等
Get off me. - Wait.
你也太弱了吧 真的吗
You're so weak, really?
我是说 我几乎啥都还没做呢
I mean, I'm barely even doing anything.
你缺铁吗 我来看看你的手掌
Are you iron-deficient? Let me look at your palm.
嗷 是因为你的男力量
Ow. It's because of your man strength,
男Perkins
Man Perkins.
放我们进去吧 Ann 外面太冷
Let us in, Ann. It's cold outside,
我又不能戴手套因为它们戴我手上没有吸引力了
and I can't wear mittens 'cause they're unflattering to my hands.
抱歉 伙计们 这是你们忏悔的时刻
Sorry, guys. This is your penance.
你们要是给Jerry做了好事才能进来
You can come in if you do something nice for Jerry.
嘿 我已经对Jerry做了好事了
Hey, I already did something nice for Jerry.
我开车来接他去Jerry晚餐的
I drove here to take him to Jerry Dinner.
哦 Donna 你能进来
Oh, Donna. You can come in.
好吧
Okay.
啥 那我们呢
What? What about us?
怎么 Donna - 圣诞婊♥子♥啦 婊♥子♥们 - Donna 别丢下我们啊 Donna
What? Donna! - Merry critches, bitches! - Donna, don't leave us! Donna?
哦 嗯 无所谓啦
Oh, well, whatever.
是Jerry的聚会 能有多酷呢
It's Jerry's party. How cool could it be?
圣诞老人
Santa!
他们有个圣诞老人
They have a Santa!
啥 - 嗷
What? - Aw!
欢迎来到印第安纳精致木工协会颁奖礼
Welcome to the Indiana Fine Woodworking Association Awards.
我是你们的主持人 Martin Housely
I'm your host, Martin Housely,
而 哇 会是场精彩的节目呢
and wow, it's gonna be a great show--
拭"木"以待
knock on wood.
"敲木头"
哦 我的天哪
Oh, my gosh.
真是巧了个合啊 看 我们坐在同一张桌子上哦
What a coinky-dinky. Look, we're sitting at the same table!
Tammy 这张桌子是预留的
Tammy, this table is reserved.
一个男的用一瞥和一捏跟我换了这个位置
A guy traded me his seat for a peek and a squeeze.
那分别是我的胸和我的屁
That's my boob and my butt, respectively.
记得吗 Ron
Remember that, Ron?
绝了
Subtle.
嗯 你们知道 他们问我愿不愿意主持这个活动
Well, you know, they asked me if I would host this event,
然后我说 "木问题"
and I said, "Would I?"
"木头的'I'"
Ben 来见见Jerry的老婆
Ben, come meet Jerry's wife.
Gayle
Gayle?
节日快乐啊 Chris - 能见到你太好了
Happy holidays, Chris. - It's so good to see you.
我有个人想带你见见
I have someone I'd like you to meet.
公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation
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