公园与游憩（2009）

Parks and Recreation S05E19

Part 2 Jan. 27, 2024, 11:51 a.m.

I now realize that I was wrong,
是时候清楚这个镇上很多过时和晦涩的法规了
and it's time that we purged the books of many of our town's outdated and obscure laws.
我写的这条法案得到了整个市议会的支持会废止110条过时法规
The bill that I have written with the full support of the city council will repeal 110 obsolete laws
例如所有经期女性应被紧闭在她们的浴缸里
such as all menstruating women shall be confined to their bathtubs
以及第二条又名 Ted聚会日
and Article Two, aka, Ted Party Day.
现在开始开放公众评论
The floor is now open for public comments.
哦开始吧
Oh, here we go.
谢谢我叫Garth Blundin
Thank you. My name is Garth Blundin,
我反对你这个可笑的提议
and I object to your ridiculous proposal.
Pawnee宪♥章♥不能被改变
The Pawnee Charter shall not be changed.
今天不行以后也不行
Not today, not ever!
哇很有激♥情♥ Blundin先生非常感谢
Wow, a lot of passion, Mr. Blundin. Thank you so much.
你的反对已被记录在案了
Your objection is noted and officially in the record.
我们要继续进行投票了吗 - 不不我们不要
Shall we proceed to a vote? - No. No, we shall not.
第三章第七条允许"市民阻挠"
Article Seven, Section Three allows for a "Citizen filibuster."
如果我站在这里拒绝放弃发言
If I stand here and refuse to yield my time,
就能妨碍你们对这个法案投票
you are prohibited from voting on the bill.
那个部分是把"水牛肉"定义为可流通货币
That section defines "Buffalo meat" as acceptable currency.
那是水牛肉那条吗 - 嗯哼
Is that the Buffalo meat one? - Mm-hmm.
我是说第七章第三条
I meant Article Three, Section Seven.
那让阻挠开始吧
Let the filibustering begin.
我现在想分享
I would now like to share
我对J.J. Abrams的《星球大战》长篇第七部的设想
some ideas I have for J.J. Abrams' seventh chapter in the Star Wars' saga.
镜头从塔图因的双子太阳垂直下降
Pan down from the twin suns of Tatooine.
我们现在接近沙拉克大坑之口
We are now close on the mouth of the Sarlacc Pit.
在被打败之后 Boba Fett的曼达洛装甲手套
After a beat, the gloved Mandalorian armor gauntlet of Boba Fett
抓住了沙拉克大坑的外沿
grabs onto the sand outside of the Sarlacc Pit
受惊的赏金猎人自己把自己从沙兽之口拖了上去
and the feared bounty hunter pulls himself from the maw of the sand beast.
恶他是对的啊他真能这么做
Ugh, he's right. He can do this.
这正是我们需要把这些法律现代化的原因啊
This is exactly why we need to modernize these laws.
这种事情还合理的时候是我们在谷仓里建市议会
This kind of thing made sense when we had council in a barn
然后镇上总共只有80个人的时候
and there were 80 people in the town,
但现在这样真是疯了
but now this is nuts.
漫威宇宙里的物品
如果他拿着现实之石
If he holds the reality gem,
那就意味着他可以在不同现实之间跳跃
that means he can jump from different realities.
这就会是连接
This will be our link
漫威宇宙和星战宇宙之间的那条线索
to the Marvel Universe from the Star Wars Universe.
想象一下和楚巴卡针锋相对的人
Imagine those who were up against Chewbacca
因为那肯定会发生的被打败之后 Luke说
'cause that's gonna happen. After a beat, Luke says,
"达斯维达是我的父亲但欧比旺是我的主人"
"Darth Vader was my father, but Ben Kenobi was my master."
《沉默的羔羊》角色
然后他把汉尼拔·莱克特切成了两半
And he cuts Hannibal Lecter in half.
Blundin先生
Mr. Blundin,
你看我试图摆脱的法律
look, the laws I'm trying to get rid of
跟现代社会已经没有关联
have no more relevance in modern society
对Pawnee来说已经很尴尬了
and they're embarrassing to Pawnee.
废止它们会显示出我们能顺应时代而改变
Repealing them would show that we're changing with the times.
你不能就乱糟糟地改掉宪♥章♥啊
You can't just change the charter willy-nilly.
你一开始只是随意废止了一些"老法律"
You start by casually repealing a couple of "old laws,"
接下来你们就有穿长筒靴的风暴兵
the next thing you know, your jack-booted storm troopers
踢开我的门没理由地逮捕我的老婆要是我结了婚的话
are kicking in my door and arresting my wife for no reason if I were married.
你说的"长筒靴的风暴兵"
By "jack-booted storm troopers,"
指的是Pawnee警局吗
do you mean the Pawnee Police Department?
嘿 Clyde - 嗨 Leslie
Hey, Clyde. - Hi, Leslie.
今天丹麦酥不错
Good Danish today.
Pawnee宪♥章♥可不是个"动态文件" Knope女士
The Pawnee charter is not a "living document," Ms. Knope.
你对这个镇的传统毫无敬意
You have no respect for the traditions of this town.
我当然有
I absolutely do.
我曾经在Pawnee历史小屋当讲解员呢
I used to give tours at the Pawnee Historical House.
得了三次"半月最佳雇员"
Three times, "Employee Of The Fortnight."
哦大事哦你穿几个小时的演出服
Oh, big deal, you put on a costume for a couple hours.
以那个逻辑的话每天晚上我睡觉的时候
By that logic, every time I go to bed at night,
我就是金刚狼
I am Wolverine.
你买♥♥了X战警的睡衣啊
You bought X-Men pajamas?
我是赢的女士在抽奖里
I won them, madam, in a raffle.
重点是我们的开镇元老们杰出而勇敢
The point is is that our Founding Fathers were brilliant and they were courageous,
但他们也有木制的假牙还在地里挖洞拉屎
but they also had wooden teeth and pooped in holes in the ground.
那是个更原始的时代 - 是个更好的时代
It was a more primitive time. - It was a better time.
你在他们的日子里活不了两个星期
You wouldn't have survived two weeks in their day.
哦是么那打个小赌吧
Oh, really? How about a little wager?
要不你和我去住在那个历史小屋里
How about you and I go live in that historical house,
没有现代科技 1817年规则
no modern technology, 1817 rules.
如果你坚持更久我撤回我的法案
If you last longer, I withdraw my bill.
我赢了你停下这些胡言乱语
I win, you stop this nonsense.
你达成了一个协议
You have yourself a deal.
请写下你想从研讨会中希望收获的
Please write down what you hope to gain from the seminar,
封在信封里然后结束时我们再打开
seal it in the envelope, and then we'll open it when it's over.
什么时候结束
When is this over?
直到你们学会接受正面动机的力量为止
As soon as you learn to embrace the power of positive motivation.
是为期两天的九小时研讨会
It's a nine-hour seminar over two days.
哇 - 哦好啊
Whoa! - Oh, good.
好吧我们开始
All right, let's begin.
请登上"管理号♥列车"
Hop on board "The Management Train."
第一站动机站
First stop-- Motivation Station.
请上车
All aboard!
别对我的华夫饼模具开价了
Stop bidding on my waffle iron.
你是"未来老虎伍兹夫人"啊
You're FutureMrsTigerWoods?
我就十年前注册的我不知道怎么改掉
I made that profile, like, ten years ago. I don't know how to change it.
重点是我要搞到那个华夫饼模具送给Leslie作早餐日礼物
The point is I'm getting that waffle iron for Leslie for breakfast day.
呃不你不能我要搞到给她做华夫饼日礼物
Uh, no, you're not. I'm getting it for her for waffle day.
等等你也有个早餐日吗
Wait, you have a breakfast day too?
我的在六月呢 - 拜托了 Ben
Mine's in June. - Please, Ben.
这是为了庆祝我们第一次去JJ's的周年纪念
This is the celebration of the anniversary of the first time we hung out at JJ's,
她把这个看作是我们友谊的开始
which she considers the beginning of our friendship.
嗯想象一下跟她结婚是什么感觉
Well, imagine being married to her.
就像是被装满珍藏记忆手工缝制的枕头给闷死
It's like being smothered with a hand-quilted pillow filled with cherished memories.
不敢相信我居然在抱怨我的老婆有多体贴
I can't believe I'm complaining about how thoughtful my wife is.
抱歉亲爱的我爱你
Sorry, honey. I love you.
你看我认识她更久了
Look, I have known her for longer,
我有五年份的纪念日所以我有先来的特权
I have five years' worth of anniversaries, so I have seniority.
哦天啊哦不
Oh, God. Oh, no.
我们拍卖♥♥输掉了 - 啥-不
We've lost the auction. - What-no.
有人最后一秒趁虚而入
Somebody swooped in at the last second,
然后我们都完蛋了 - 不
and now we're both screwed. - No.
好吧 Tyrion Lannister 你为啥不使个咒语
Okay, Tyrion Lannister, why don't you just cast a spell
给我们把华夫饼模具搞回来呢 - 哦好吧
and get us the waffle iron back? - Oh, okay.
我甚至没时间告诉你你错得多离谱
I don't even have time to tell you how wrong you are.
实际上不说的话我会很膈应的
Actually, it's gonna bug me if I don't.
Lannister一家虽然很富有
The Lannisters, while very wealthy,
并不具有比如像Qarth的术士那样的魔法能力
do not possess the magical abilities of, say, the warlocks of Qarth for example.
所以我们才没怎么打交道呢
This is why we don't hang out.
想象你们自己是火车司机
Think of yourselves as engineers
驾驶一辆由团队力量供能的积极性的火车头
steering a locomotive of positivity that runs on team power.
首先火车头不是你"驾驶"的
First of all, you don't "steer" a locomotive.
而是轨道
The tracks do.
第二只有三种方式能激发人-- 金钱恐惧和饥饿
Second, there are only three ways to motivate people-- money, fear, and hunger.
哦我不同意
Oh, I disagree.
那鼓励和赏识呢
What about encouragement, appreciation,
还有微笑
and smiles.
当人们感觉受到支持
When people feel supported,
他们真的会爆发出生产力
they will literally explode with productivity.
你们能就想出那种方式更好
Can you guys just figure out which way is better
然后告诉我放我走吗
and tell me so we can leave?
感谢你的投入 April
Thank you for your input, April,
但CTMTS要求我们遵循一个明确的大纲
but the ka-tumts requires that we follow a very specific syllabus.
你没有表现得很包容 Chris
You're not being very inclusive, Chris.
我感觉我的投入没有受到赏识
I feel like my input isn't being appreciated.
你杀掉了我的振作
You've killed my spirit.
我振作的血在你的手上
My spirit blood is on your hands.
天啊我已经教会你太多了
My God, I've taught you so much already.
Ron 我提议一个挑战