极品老妈

Mom S01E12

Part 3 Jan. 4, 2020, 1:28 p.m.

Can't have a Russian hooker every night.
简直难以置信
I don't believe this.
你是什么人啊
What kind of a man are you?
自私自恋
Well, selfish, narcissistic,
被一个冷酷而冷淡的老妈摧残得无力去爱
emotionally crippled by a cold and distant mother.
就是平常那种人啦
You know, the usual.
她会难受死的
She's gonna be devastated.
那你最好温柔点告诉她
Well, then you better break it to her gently.
我才不告诉她
I'm not gonna tell her.
真残忍♥
Wow, that seems cruel.
但由你决定啦
But your call.
怎么回事
What's going on?
那头猪上了我妈妈
That pig slept with my mother.
感同身受
Welcome to the club.
-罗斯科睡了吗 -睡了
- Roscoe asleep? - Yup.
你今晚做了什么
What'd you do tonight?
关你啥事
What do you care?
别这样嘛
Oh, come on.
今早的事我很抱歉
I'm sorry about this morning.
真的吗所以你承认鲁迪和我
Really? So, you admit that Rudy and I
可以有一段认真的感情咯
are capable of having a meaningful relationship?
我承认我爱你
I admit that I love you.
好吧怎么回事
All right, what's going on?
鲁迪和你分手了
Rudy's done with you.
为什么是你告诉我而不是他
Well, why are you telling me instead of him?
因为
Because...
他被他妈摧残得无力去爱了
he was emotionally crippled by his mother.
而且
And, you know...
他是个大傻♥逼♥
he's a giant douche.
所以我完全看错他了
Wow, so I completely misread him.
真抱歉
I'm so sorry.
不你警告过我
No, you warned me.
我是个大姑娘了
I'm a big girl.
该更了解的
I should have known better.
瞧瞧我还在美甲
Look at me, giving myself a pedicure
好让那个混♥蛋♥可以吮吸我漂亮的红脚趾
so that jerk could suckle on a pretty red toe.
他喜欢这样吗
Is that his thing?
是啊他那张嘴简直和中国指套一样
Oh, yeah, he's got a mouth like a Chinese finger trap.
我不该问的
My fault, I asked.
好吧我要去冲个澡了
All right, I'm gonna take a quick shower.
帮我跟你男友问好
Say hi to your boyfriend.
问题是他看到你赤身裸体后我们就分手了啊
I would, but after he saw you naked, we broke up.
-你会没事吧 -没事
- Are you gonna be all right? - Oh, yeah.
不会做什么疯狂的事吧
Not gonna do anything crazy?
快去洗澡吧
Oh, come on, go take a shower.
她真是一点也不了解我啊
It's like she doesn't know me at all.
对我要一个中号♥的肉食匹萨
Yes, I want a medium meat lover's pizza
外壳上加奶酪
with cheese in the crust.
是的还要一些疯狂面包
Yes, and some crazy bread.
你好啊鲁道夫
Hello, Rudolph.
邦妮
Bonnie.
你怎么进来的
How'd you get in my house?
拜托谁和男人上♥床♥后
Oh, please. Who sleeps with a man
不偷走他的备用钥匙啊
and doesn't steal his spare keys?
好吧你想怎么样
Okay. What do you want?
我想伤害你
What I want is to hurt you.
但不是伤害你的身体因为
But not physically, because...
你可能会喜欢那样
you might like that.
我打算在精神层面伤害你就像你伤了我的心一样
But on an emotional level, like you hurt me.
你可是找错了对象啊姐妹
No, you are barking up the wrong tree, sister,
多年前我就没有感情了
because I stopped feeling years ago.
真的吗
Really?
走着瞧吧
We'll see.
1957年拉图酒庄
"1957 Chateau Latour."
听起来不错啊
Ooh, sounds fancy.
谢谢你
Thank you.
我的下一个把戏
And for my next trick,
我会试着边抛边接三瓶
I will attempt to juggle three bottles of...
梦拉榭葡萄酒
ooh, Montrachet.
看来我水平不到家啊
I'm not very good.
好吧我撒谎了我在浴室里还干了别的
Okay, I lied. I didn't just get clean.
妈
Mom?
妈
Mom?
该死
Oh, damn it!
不
No.
这瓶木桐庄献给小吉米
And this Mouton Rothschild is for little Jimmy,
他生病住院了
who's sick in the hospital.
求你不要了
Please, no more.
这瓶蒙特雷纳酒献给所有红酒"行家"
And this Chateau Montelena is for all the wine snobs
和他们果仁味的前调
and their nutty top notes.
够了
Enough!
住手
Stop!
我接受不了了
I can't take it anymore.
太棒了
Good.
过来吧
Come to me.
天啊你太霸气了
Oh, my God, you're magnificent.
现在怎么办
Now what?
给老娘舔
Suckle.
有人吗
Hello?
天啊我来得太晚了
Oh, my God, I'm too late.
好棒邦妮
Ah, ah, oh, yeah, Bonnie,
就这样抽得再重点
right there, wicked hard!
那到底是谁啊
Who the hell is that?
天啊
Oh, my God.
鸭肝头比腌牛肉好吃多了
This duck pate is so much better than corned beef.
是啊而且家里也不会闻起来像是
Yeah, and the house won't smell like
一千只臭鸡蛋放屁的味道
a thousand egg farts.
喂
Hello.
你好鲁迪主厨
Oh, hi, Chef Rudy.
谢谢你的野餐篮
Thanks for the picnic basket.
我知道不是给我的
Yeah, I know it's not for me.
怎么了
What's up?
等等让我看看她在不在这里
Hang on, let me see if she's here.
她不在
She's not here.
要我转达什么吗
Can I take a message?
慢点我拿只笔
Oh, s-slow down, let me grab a pen.
说吧
Go ahead.
昨晚我们的性♥爱♥游戏
"The... the dark, violent turn
变得黑暗且暴♥力♥ 这吓坏我了
our love play took last night haunts me."
等等再说一遍
Wait, say again.
酒瓶塞会留在那个地方
"The wine cork will remain where it is
作为我承诺的象征
as a sign of my commitment."
好吧我会转告给她的
All right, I'll be sure she gets the message.
我当然不会告诉餐厅的人啦
Of course I won't tell anyone at the restaurant.
拜拜
Bye-bye.
看来某人很喜欢你哦
I think someone's sweet on you.