糟心的我（2018）

I Feel Bad S01E11

Part 4 May 11, 2021, 9:16 a.m.

可能你才是那个无趣的人
but maybe you're not fun.
你说我们俩没吵架
You said we weren't in a fight.
我骗你呢
I lied.
要是我说错了你就证明给我看吧
And I guess if I'm wrong, you'll prove it.
准备好了姐们儿我们要上去了
So strap in, sister, 'cause we are going on this ride.
我开吧
I got it.
你好弗吉尼亚你好珀尔
Hi, Virginia. Hi, Pearl.
你好莉莉
Hi, Lily.
赛珀尔咱们有什么安排吗
Sai, Pearl, did we have plans?
不是我们有安排
No, we have plans.
我的哥们赛要教我打壁球
My man Sai's gonna teach me how to play racquetball,
然后我们会去社区中心待会儿
and then we're gonna hang in the community center
看看讣告
and read obits.
我呢要教女士们舞步
And I'm teaching the ladies dance moves.
五六七八
Five, six, seven, eight.
不敢相信这群老东西把外孙子孙女给拐跑了
I can't believe those geezers stole our grandkids.
请问小婴儿在家吗
Excuse me, is the baby home?
我想闻闻他
I wanna smell it.
老天啊
Dear God.
把杰克藏好给她找个别的东西闻吧
Hide Jakey and find her something else to smell.
-我说戴维 -什么事
- Excuse me, David. - Yes?
我只是想晚上出去高高兴兴地玩玩
I was just trying to have a nice night out,
如果说有谁需要的话那也是你
which if anyone needs, you do.
你整天听儿歌♥ 还不是陪孩子听的
Um, you listen to Kidz Bop without the kids.
怎么了有节奏还不黄暴
Yeah, it's all the beat and none of the filth.
如果我不再有趣了
And if I'm not fun anymore,
也许是你让我那样的
maybe it's because you made me that way.
我怎么是我
Me? How?
我曾经是个音乐家喜欢旅行
I used to be a musician, I loved to travel,
我去「真实世界」试了那么多次音
I auditioned for the "Real World" so many times,
我放弃了这一切为了能有个稳定的工作
and I gave it all up so I could get a stable job
好让你成为一名艺术家
so that you could be an artist.
你不但不感恩
And instead of appreciating that,
还觉得我让你感到无聊了
you're obviously bored by me.
你怎敢把我们糟糕的生活都怪到我头上
How dare you blame our terrible life on me?
是工作的事
It's work.
我知道你把这当工作婚姻嘛
Yes, I know it's work. It's a marriage.
不这是工作电♥话♥
No, it's work calling.
干什么
What?
-我的天 -不友好
- Whoa. - Hostile.
你很不友好
That was very hostile.
抱歉
Sorry.
我正在吵架
I'm in the middle of a thing.
你们要干什么
Okay, what do you need?
我们正在照顾摔倒的格瑞夫
So we're looking after Griff while he heals from his fall,
问你个问题
and quick question:
我们能给他同时吃扑热息痛和布洛芬吗
can we give Griff both acetaminophen and ibuprofen?
因为我们已经给他吃了
Because we did that.
可以没问题
Yes, it is fine.
他可能会拉一些颜色奇怪的大便
He will probably have some odd-colored poop,
但这有什么新鲜的吗
but what else is new?
听我说在你们给我打电♥话♥之前
Okay, listen, while I have you guys on the phone,
戴维跟我说他为了让我追求我的事业
David just told me that he gave up an exciting life
而放弃了他精彩的生活
so I could pursue my career.
我从来不知道他是这么想的
I never knew he felt that way.
天啊这刀狠啊
Wow, deep cut.
没错一开始我很生气
I know, and at first, I was mad.
但现在我觉得他说得对
But now I think I did do that.
我模糊地记得11年前的一次谈话
And I vaguely remember a conversation 11 years ago
关于弹性工作时间和搁置他的梦想
about flexible hours and putting his dreams on hold.
现在他要尝试一次地狱蹦极
And now he's about to ride this Dive Devil ride
就为了重新感受一下刺♥激♥
just to feel alive again.
地狱蹦极
简直像过年啊
Christmas Day.
你们两个
You guys.
埃梅作为一个温顺随和的人
Emet, as a docile, accommodating human being,
我一眼就看穿了他
I recognize a brethren.
戴维在虚张声势
David's bluffing.
等等你这么觉得吗
Wait, you think so?
肯定的
Uh, for sure.
上次我们去你家的时候
Last time we were at your house,
他点燃烤肉架的时候
he wouldn't even let us stand next to him
甚至不让我们站他旁边
while he lit the barbecue.
所以他不可能去做惊险刺♥激♥的蹦极
There's no way he's going on some thrill plunge.
他只是在表达立场
He's making a point.
我的老天你说的对
Oh, my God, you're right.
他怎么敢用我的成就来对付我
How dare he use my accomplishments against me?
我这就让他摊牌
Okay, you know what? I am calling his bluff.
然后他不得不承认
And then he's gonna have to admit
我不是他无聊的原因他自己才是
I'm not the reason he's boring; he is.
然后我们可以得到一个油炸饼
And then we can get a funnel cake.
伙计们
Hey, guys.
伙计们我的屎是蓝色的
Hey, guys, my poop is blue.
你们快来看看
You gotta see this.
埃梅我们得挂了
Emet, we have to go.
没错我们必须去看看
Yeah, we really have to see this.
好吧
Okay.
借过一下
Pardon me.
-宝贝 -怎么了
- Baby... - Hmm?
你是对的
You were right.
-是吗 -是的
- I was? - Yes.
这些年来我一直在拖你的后腿
I have been holding you back all these years.
我很抱歉
And I'm sorry.
我不再拖你后腿了
You know what? I am done being your anchor.
我们去蹦极吧
Let's go ride the ride.
-真的吗 -真的
- Yeah? - Yes.
-太好了 -好的
- Excellent. - Okay.
我要去趟厕所
Ooh, I gotta go to the bathroom.
你能等我一会儿吗占好位置
Can you hold just one second? Hold our spot.
-我来占着 -好的
- I'll hold it. - Okay.
我不会走的
Not gonna move.
挑战成功他退缩了
Gauntlet thrown. He's backing down.
你的计划是带她去地狱蹦极吗
Your plan was to take her on Dive Devil?
太聪明了兄弟
That's brilliant, my friend.
不她应该向我认怂
No, she's supposed to bail,
然后我就能反败为胜
and then I'm gonna turn the tables on her
向她证明她才是那个无聊的人
and prove to her that she's the one that's not fun anymore.
但是她没有认怂
But she's not bailing.
这太扯了她在虚张声势
That's bullshit. She's bluffing.
就算我没在你旁边我也能看出来
I can tell and I'm not even there.
她不会去冒这个险的她是位母亲
She wouldn't take a risk like that; she's a mother.
不管你去哪儿她都让你坐不同的航♥班♥
She makes you fly on separate planes whenever you go anywhere.
我的老天你说的对
O-M-God, you are right.
兄弟就是这样
Oh, man, it is on.
她可真是挑错了对手
She's playing chicken with the wrong rooster.
我真是烦透那婆娘了
I'm so sick of that woman.
凯文拜托
Okay, Kevin, come on.
我还爱着她别这么说话
I still love her. Take it easy.
我知道对不起
I'm sorry. I know.
我说话太过火了
I came in too hot on that one.
没事的没事的
It's fine. It's fine.
好的排空膀胱信心满满不能输
All right, empty bladder, full heart, can't lose.
来吧
It's go time.
-你说什么 -到你了
- Um, what? - Oh, yeah, we're next.
你激动吗我激动得发麻
Are you tingling? I'm tingling all over.
太麻了
So much tingling.
好吧我说错了
Okay, called that wrong.
戴维不是装的
David wasn't faking.
让我想想
Excuse me for a second.
好吧戴维没有认怂
Okay, David's not taking the bait.
我得狠狠敲打他然后从蹦极架子上下去