糟心的我（2018）

I Feel Bad S01E11

Part 3 May 11, 2021, 9:16 a.m.

If I can't make David feel better about himself,
我们愉快的周末就要玩完了
our fun weekend is screwed.
她看起来挺性感也玩得开
Hmm, she looks hot and crazy.
有主意了
Getting an idea.
打扰了我叫埃梅
Hi, hi, sorry. I'm Emet.
你看起来还想再来一杯莫吉托
You look like you could use another...mojito?
一种鸡尾酒含薄荷
是啊我爱死薄荷了
Oh, my God, yeah. I love mint.
谁不是啊
Who doesn't, right?
-我叫凯莉 -你好凯凯
- I'm Kylie. - Hi, Ky-ky.
看见那个人了吗
Listen, see that guy over there?
那是我丈夫他只是需要
That is my husband, and he just needs
提升一下自尊
a little self-esteem boost.
你今晚的酒我请了
I got your drinks for the night
如果你能和他调调情的话
if you just flirt with him a little bit?
我这辈子从没听过
That is the sweetest thing
这么体贴的事
I've ever heard in my whole life.
谢谢我很爱他
Oh, I'm so glad. See, I love him.
我只是觉得他的生活变得有些乏味了
I just think he's in a little bit of a rut.
你有去过意面洞吗[走过后♥庭♥吗]
You ever been to The Spaghetti Hole?
这个我接受不了
Yeah, I don't do that.
不不不对不起
Oh, no, no, no, no. Sorry.
这只是个餐厅的名字
That's just a restaurant.
总之他是个好男人
Anyway, doesn't matter. He's a great guy,
我们只需让他重新焕发活力
and we just need to pep him back up.
明白了交给我吧妹子
Say no more. I got you, girl.
多谢了妹子
Thank you, girl.
你是我在州立大学经济课上的同学吗
Hey are you in my econ class at State?
我吗
Me?
看来在昏暗的环境下我确实显得挺帅
Wow, I do look good in the dark.
你对最近的政局有什么看法
So what do you think of the recent political climate?
我觉得糟透了
I think it sucks.
说得好年轻人
Whoa, well said, young man.
你就是那种
You know, you're the kind of guy
应当管事的人
that should be running things.
没错
True.
路易该睡觉了
Louie, it's almost bedtime.
-你嘘嘘了吗 -外公别插嘴
- Did you go pee-pee? - Grandpa, please.
我们在讨论世界局势
We're discussing the state of the world.
很抱歉赛我们说到哪了
I'm sorry, Sai, where were we?
那些混♥蛋♥吃光了我的墨西哥玉米片
Those animals ate all my tortilla chips.
现在我得拿每次飞机上顺走的椒盐卷饼来充数
Now I have to dip into my stash of airplane pretzels.
你来陪着珀尔
Keep Pearl company.
你好我叫莉莉
Hi, I'm Lily.
你想知道拴住男人的秘诀吗
You wanna know the secret to keeping a man?
我喜欢小秘密
I love secrets.
等他上班后再去大便
Don't poop until he leaves for work.
多谢分享
Good to know.
天哪随着这节奏跳舞真难
God, it really is hard to dance to this.
换首曲子吧这都已经持续十五分钟了
Drop the beat already. It's been, like, 15 minutes.
不过好在我的计划成功了
On the other hand, my plan is working.
戴维终于找回了自信
David's finally feeling good about himself.
一丝笑容一点触碰
Oh, a little giggle, a little arm touch.
他舒展开了成功了
He's flexing. Yeah, it's working.
现在该和我老公共度一个浪漫愉快的夜晚了
Now it's time to have a sexy, fun night with my man.
-帅哥 -嘿
- Hey, hottie. - Hey.
-你看起来不错啊 -是吗
- You look hot. - Yeah?
我有错过什么吗
Did I miss anything?
没什么但我错过了你这个大美人
I don't know what you missed, but I missed that ass.
我也搞不清不知道怎么
I don't know. I feel alive
我感觉自己充满活力而且魅力四射
and attractive for no particular reason.
你是个天才埃梅
Yes, you're a genius, Emet.
你的迈克尔·乔丹古龙水
By the way, that Michael Jordan cologne
和你自身的雄性味道混合在一起
is combining with your natural musk,
把我迷得不行
and I am vibing it to the moon.
-真的吗 -真的
- Yeah? - Yeah.
-你知道还有谁也喜欢吗 -谁
- You know who else liked it? - Hmm?
被你收买♥♥来跟我调情的那个姑娘
That girl you bribed to flirt with me.
他爸爸也用同样的古龙水
Her dad wears the same cologne.
真讨厌她们怎么都有老爸呢
Damn it, why do they always have to have dads?
埃梅我原本以为今天晚上
You know, Emet, I didn't think
我的心情已经低落到地面了
I could feel worse about tonight,
结果你让我知道还有地下室呢
but somehow you managed to make that happen.
我撤了
I'm done.
等等戴维别这样
Wait, wait, wait. David, come on.
我一头撞倒门上
We got one free weekend
才给我们弄来个自♥由♥的周末
that I ran into a door to get us,
你都不愿意努力过得开心吗
and you can't even try to have a good time?
可能是你不再那么有趣了
Maybe you're just not that fun anymore.
天啊
Wow.
等等戴维我不是那个意思...
David, wait. I didn't mean it like...
真是的现在才换曲子
Oh, great, now you drop the beat.
戴维和我都郁闷地睡觉之后
After David and I both went to sleep mad,
我做好吵架的准备
I was bracing myself.
他生起气来整个人都能表现出来
He has a way of pouting with his whole body.
看着啊我要摸他一下
Watch, I'm gonna touch him,
而他就会使出他泰勒·斯威夫特的扭肩动作来
and he's gonna do his Taylor Swift shoulder roll.
早啊
Hey, morning.
我得为我辩解一下我...
Okay, in my defense, I...
等下我们没吵架吗
Wait, are we not in a fight?
我承认昨晚我确实很不高兴
I will admit, I was pretty upset last night.
昨晚就是一场没完没了地嘶吼般的噩梦
I mean, I had a nightmare that was one long scream.
但是我想过了你说得对
But then I thought about it. You're right.
我最近是变得没有趣味
I have lost my sense of fun lately,
我得把我的趣味找回来
and I wanna get it back.
所以今天我为我们策划了个不得了的事情
So today I have something amazing planned for us.
亲爱的这就是我嫁给你的原因
Oh, honey, this is why I married you.
-那我们要去哪里呢 -这是个惊喜
- Okay, where are we going? - It's a surprise.
-好吧 -穿身适合冒险的衣服
- Okay. - Dress for adventure.
今天你将渡过生命里最棒的一天
Today you're gonna have the best time of your life.
今天她将渡过生命里最糟的一天
Today she's gonna have the worst time of her life.
天啊因为你太无聊
Wow, paying a woman to flirt with you
-就付钱给个女的来跟你调情 -是啊
- 'cause you're too boring. - Mm-hmm.
你老婆实在太过分了
Your wife is off the deep end, man.
就是她说我无趣
Yeah, she says I'm not fun?
她才无趣呢我就要证明这点
She's not fun, and I'm gonna prove it.
我拖也要把她拖过去
I'm gonna hold her feet to the fun fire
直到她求饶为止
until she cries uncle.
你需要我偷偷戴个麦克来录音吗
Hey, do you want me to wear a wire?
我的身体特别适合戴个麦克
'Cause I'm the perfect body type to wear a wire.
你把我全身搜个遍根本觉察不出来
You can pat me down and you don't feel nothing.
不用了
No, I think we're good.
但是感谢你的倾听
Thank you for listening, though.
我们就快到了
Okay, we're almost there.
我的天你会这样安排我真不敢相信
Oh, my God, i can't believe you did this.
-好了站住 -好
- Okay, stop, stop, stop. Okay. - Yeah.
-准备好摘掉它了吗 -好了
- Ready to take it off? - Yeah.
眼罩摘掉请...
And blindfold coming off, and..
准备好了
I am. I am. I am. I am. I am.
看地狱蹦极
Behold, the Dive Devil.
你说了你想要冒险
You said you wanted adventures.
我们以前老是做这样的事
We used to do this kind of thing all the time.
确实亲爱的不过那时候我们还是小屁孩呢
I mean, yeah, babe, when we were stupid kids,
我们现在是成年人了
but we're adults now.
我们为什么还要这么对待自己
Why would we do that to ourselves?
哎呦有意思了啊
W-well, that's interesting,
我在夜店里觉得不合拍的时候
'cause when I felt out of place at the nightclub,
你就说我无趣
I was not fun.
而当你对我想做的事情泼冷水时
But when you're a total buzzkill at my thing,
你就是成年人了
you're an "Adult."
怎么说都是你的理你说我无趣
How convenient, 'cause you said I was not fun,