糟心的我（2018）
I Feel Bad
第一季
剧集 | 糟心的我（2018） | 导航列表
糟心的我（2018）
I Feel Bad S01E01
Part 2
May 11, 2021, 9:14 a.m.
It's more like pizza that's stale and fallen between the sofa cushions
和新鲜滚烫的披萨
versus pizza that's hot and fresh.
你是这个意思对吧 我们想要
That's what you mean, right? Do we want, like,
沙发上放久了的
older sofa pizza
家里还有三个孩子的披萨吗
that has three kids at home?
我突然很想吃披萨 我是一个人吗
Is it just me, or does pizza sound really good right now?
不是指你
Not talking about you.
会议室
算了 不谈长相了
Okay, you know what? Forget looks.
你们成天画胸大得跟保龄球一样的辣妹
We all know that your minds are warped
审美都扭曲了
from drawing chicks with giant bowling ball boobs all day.
再说要有女人真长成那样 早折成两半了
By the way, if I woman had those proportions, she'd snap in half.
左右对折还是上下对折
Bilaterally or top to bottom?
不确定 楚易
I don't know, Chewey.
我的意思是 沉着幽默的性格更重要
All I'm saying is having a cool, fun personality is way more important.
-没错 -谢谢你
- True. - Thank you.
-你有时候唠唠叨叨的 -没错
- You kind of nag sometimes. - Oh, yeah.
-什么 -而且你很爱挑刺
- What? - And you're critical,
这也是我不愿意「上」你的原因
which is why I, hypothetically, wouldn't do it with you.
我整天听你念叨
I mean, I can just hear it:
楚易 你嘟嘟囔囔像个娘们儿
"Chewey, your grunts are too feminine."
楚易 你肚子的形状怎么这么奇怪
"Chewey, how come your belly's shaped weird?"
楚易 你怎么满身大汗
"Chewey, how can you be this sweaty already?"
楚易 你恶心到我了
Chewey, you're grossing me out.
是的 你也说过这个
Yeah, that would be another one.
行吧 我也许有些缺点
Okay, fine. Maybe I have some flaws.
但是你们哥几个看看你们自己
Well, you guys could stand to take a look at yourselves.
什么时候书呆子也开始吹毛求疵了
I mean, when did nerds get so damn picky?
书呆子现在很酷 我们和模特约会呢
Nerds are cool now. We date models.
是吧 霍金
Right, Hawking?
-没错 -好孩子
- Yeah. - Good boy.
好孩子
Good boy. Yeah.
一开始 我在想
You know, at first I was like,
谁会在意这些书呆子的想法
"Who cares what those nerds think?"
但是我突然发现 他们好像说得对
But then I thought, "those guys have a point.
我有时候确实唠唠叨叨 爱挑刺
I can be critical and naggy."
莉莉跟我说她参加了舞蹈队的时候
I mean, when Lily told me she's joining dance team
我对她就像我妈当年对我一样
I treated her exactly the way my mom treated me when I was her age.
天呐 你拿鞋砸她啦
Crap. You threw your shoe at her.
才没有 我妈才会扔鞋砸我
No! My mother's the shoe-thrower.
但我的确没有支持她 打击了她的积极性
But I did kind of crush her spirit and act unsupportive.
我决定了 我要支持她
You know what? I'm gonna support her.
我不必变得像我妈一样
I don't have to turn into my mother.
我是不好惹的女人 拥有钢铁般的意志
I'm a badass woman with a will of iron.
你在出租车里分娩时都能自己中止
You stopped yourself giving birth to a baby in a taxi,
当时孩子头都露出来了
and you were crowning.
是 我是这么做了
Yeah, you're damn right I did,
如果我希望在生孩子时
because if I wanted an Indian person to yell at me
被印度人♥大♥吼大叫 我就让我妈进产房♥了
while I was giving birth I would have let my mom into the delivery room.
玛雅
Maya.
你看上去很迷人 你的美貌打动了我的心
You look fetching. I'm smitten by your appearance this evening.
你怎么了小伙子
What's wrong with you, man?
不要逼我跟你抢她哦
Don't make me fight you for her.
你要干嘛
What are you doing?
我正在解决你之前担心的问题
I'm addressing your concern from earlier.
别这么做行吗 太奇怪了
Don't do it like that. It's weird.
好啦大家 莉莉很激动
All right, everyone, Lily is very excited.
她想给我们跳一支舞
She wants to show us her dance routine.
什么舞
What dance?
你应该说服她退出舞蹈队
You were supposed to talk her out of it.
不 老妈 不像你
No, Mom. Unlike you,
我百分之百支持我的女儿
I'm actually supporting my daughter 100%.
也许有一天她吸毒了
Oh, maybe one day she'll do crystal meth.
全家倾力支持 一家子犯毒瘾啥的
We can all support her. Tweaked out as a family.
我为莉莉而骄傲
I am proud of Lily.
她是一个坚强的小姑娘 懂得自己想要什么
She's a strong young lady who knows her mind
-会做出正确选择 -你们准备好了吗
- and makes good choices. - Are you guys ready?
-是的 我们准备好了 -准备好啦
- Yes, yes! We're so ready! - We're ready!
BGM: My Humps by Black Eyed Peas
* Don't pull on my hand boy *
* You ain't my man boy *
* I'm just trying a dance boy *
* And move my hump *
* My hump, my hump, *
这 行吧
Uh, okay.
* My lovely lady lumps *
* My lovely lady lumps *
* My lovely lady lumps *
* In the back and in the front *
这我怎么支持啊
How am I supposed to support that?
这他♥娘♥的♥是个啥
What the hell was that?
我哪里做错了
Where did I go wrong?
是因为那次我让她看了
Is this because I let her watch five minutes
五分钟的「艳舞♥女♥郎」吗
of "Showgirls" that one time?
大家别慌 我在「日界线」里看过
Nobody panic. I saw on "Dateline"
有个野营项目可以解决这种问题
that there's a camp for this.
说是大半夜把孩子带走
They take the child away in the middle of the night
等孩子回来 完全改过自新
and bring them back completely reformed.
我觉得莉莉跳得挺好的
I thought Lily was amazing.
我想听听这个野营项目
I would like to hear more about this camp.
野营很贵的啊
Camp is very expensive these days.
亲爱的 要么帮我们 要么上车等着
Sweetie, either help me or wait in the car.
-车上见 -莉莉很有天赋 不是吗
- Car. - Lily is such a natural, right?
她跳的时候 我真觉得蛮性感的
I mean, when she dropped it I really believed it was hot.
是我听错了 还是这首歌♥里
Was it me, or did it seem like the word "booty"
到处都是「屁♥股♥」这个词
was thrown around a lot in that song?
我不认为「屁♥股♥」代表臀部
I don't think "booty" meant booty.
我认为这是暗示 阴♥道♥
I think it was code-- for vagina.
我也这么觉得
I thought that too.
我真的很欣赏她有自我表达能力
You know what? I guess I just really appreciate self-expression.
我要回家洗个热水澡
I'm going home to take a hot bath.
不要太激动 小伙子
Don't get too excited, man.
啥
What?
我的天呐 她跳的是什么
Oh, my God, what was that dance?
我就知道你刚刚在撒谎
Oh, my God, I knew you were lying.
-当然了 -这个舞简直
- Of course I was. - That dance was very...
-这个舞真的 -太成熟了
- If it's... - Advanced.
我知道现在女孩儿成熟的早
I know! Girls mature faster these days.
和鸡肉里的荷尔蒙什么的有关联
It's something to do with the hormones in chicken or something.
这正是有些女孩年纪轻轻胸就大的原因
It's why some of them get boobs so young.
吃鸡肉能丰胸吗 我天天吃鸡肉
Chicken gives you boobs? I eat chicken every day.
我会有鸡胸吗
Am I gonna get chicken boobs?
也许我应该多吃些海鲜
Maybe I can eat more seafood.
好了 戴维 跑题了
Okay, David, focus.
我没跑题啊 我们要告诉莉莉
I am focused. We're telling Lily
她不能参加舞蹈队
that she cannot be on the dance team.
不 绝对不行 我们不能这么做
No, no, we can't do that.
我不能用她喜爱的东西羞辱她
No, I refuse to shame her over something
我不能用她喜爱的东西羞辱她
that she loves and she's excited about.
我妈就这么干的 所以我现在很怨恨她
That is what my mom did to me and it made me resent her.
将来她生孩子的时候 我想在产房♥里
I wanna be in the delivery room when she gives birth.
-你不想吗 -不想
- Don't you? - Um, no.
听着 如果莉莉很想参加舞蹈队
Look, if Lily is passionate about dance team,
我们不能像这样一本正经 大惊小怪
we cannot be so-- so uptight and prudish.
我们要试着理解她 支持她
We have to try to understand and support her.
说到海鲜
Oh, and seafood?
里面全是汞 会使你的睾丸萎缩
Full of mercury. Shrinks your testicles.
你也听到你妈说「阴♥道♥」这个词了
So does hearing your mom say "vagina."
你知道吗 我能做到的
You know what? I can do this.
我不用像我妈一样
I don't have to be like my mom.
我能成为一个讲道理的
I can be reasonable...
合理的 公平的母亲
rational, and even-handed.
我要阻止我女儿
I think I need to sabotage my daughter.
你打算怎么做
Well, how do you want to do it?
心理操纵 心理战 还是闪电突袭
Gaslighting, Mind Games, Coup de Main acts?
恶作剧 欺诈 把生活弄的一团糟
Shenanigans, skullduggery, gumming up the works.
糟心的我（2018）
I Feel Bad
剧集 | 糟心的我（2018） | 导航列表