糟心的我（2018）

I Feel Bad S01E09

Part 4 May 11, 2021, 9:16 a.m.

Ah! I did not want to go to that wedding.
托比这人简直有毒
Toby has a toxic personality.
而且婚礼在图森举办
And it's in Tucson.
-所以你不想去 -没错
- No thank you. - Yeah.
-看我多了解你 -谢谢你
- Okay. Well I'm here for you. - Thank you.
好的很好
Okay. So good.
接下来要做的就是诬陷保姆犯罪
I knew what I had to do: frame the nanny for a felony.
好吧就算是我也做不到我做不到
Okay, even for me that's a low. I can't, I can't--
让我来把它拿开
Oh, let me get that out of your way.
路易的平板电脑
Louie's iPad?
它怎么会在我包里
How did that get in my bag?
我也在想这个问题
I was wondering the same thing.
是我♥干♥的我把平板电脑放包里的
It was me. I did it. I put the iPad in the bag.
我不觉得事实是这样
I don't think that's what happened.
事实就是如此我看见了
It is what happened. I saw.
安娜·梅对我们很好我想送她一件礼物
I wanted to give Anna Mae a present for being the best.
路易
Louie.
我很感动但我不能收下它
That's very sweet but I couldn't accept that.
但我能收下你的拥抱
You know what I do take? Hugs.
-过来 -拥抱她好好拥抱她
- Come here. - Get her. Get her good.
他们在保护她我的保姆虽然不是小偷
God, they're protecting her. My nanny's not a thief
但我的孩子们是骗子
but my kids are frickin' liars.
我得干票大的我要摧毁她的形象
I need something big. I will break her.
老家伙我们再生个孩子吧
Googaloo, shall we have a baby?
我就知道我应该把止痛药切一半
I knew I should have cut those pain pills in half.
印度有一个72岁的女人
There was a 72 year old in India
把别的女人的受精卵放到自己体内
who stuck some other woman's eggs inside her
然后生出了孩子
and plopped out a baby.
我为什么不能
Why can't I?
我知道你想你的孙子孙女了
Okay, look. I know you miss the grandchildren
但是你会适应的有点耐心
but you'll get better soon. Just be patient.
你说的对老家伙我很想他们
You're right, Googaloo. I miss my grandkids so much.
你能给我拿一个既硬又软的枕头吗
Can you get me a pillow that's as firm as it is soft?
如果我要把这个招人喜欢的吸血鬼赶出家门
If I was going to get this loveable leech out of the way
我需要戴维站在我这边
I needed David on my side.
我要戳他的痛处他的老式吉他
I was gonna hit him where it hurts--his vintage guitar,
名字叫黄油
which he named Butter.
对不起了黄油
Sorry, Butter.
我很抱歉我就一会儿没看着杰克
I'm so sorry. I took my eyes off Jake for a second.
他肯定想办法拧开了颜料的盖子
He must have found a way to reach and unscrew the cap
抹到了他手上
to the paint and then he got it on his fingers
然后涂得吉他满身都是
and got it all over the guitar
同时又没有滴落到地上
without getting a drop anywhere else, somehow?
好了细节并不重要
Okay, you know what, the details actually don't really matter.
对我来说比起你毁掉的这个
What concerns me more than the very, very,
极其特别非常珍贵的吉他来说更重要的是
very special guitar that you ruined
为什么你没照看好我们的孩子
is why were you not watching our child?
这上面写着食用有毒
I mean, this says toxic if swallowed.
宝宝并没有碰到有毒的颜料
Okay, the baby didn't touch toxic paint.
我把它们调包了
I switched them out.
他也许还会摸到药
You know, he could have gotten into pills,
老鼠药浴盐
rat poison, bath salts.
这件事情很严重安娜·梅
I mean, this is serious, Anna Mae.
麻烦你向我们解释一下
Can you just please explain to us
在你把我们的宝宝一个人扔在这里的时候
what you could have possibly been doing
你去干什么了
that made you leave our baby alone?
我是在打电♥话♥
I was on my phone
但是我在给孩子们做表情包
but I was making Bitmojis of the kids.
好吧不知道那是什么
Okay, don't know what that means.
是很有趣的卡♥通♥画
Super fun cartoon.
虽然不想这么说但是你被开除了
I can't believe I'm saying this but we have to let you go.
我明白我去拿一下我的东西
I understand. I'll get my things.
谁干的埃梅干的
Who did that? Emet did that.
好吧亲爱的我知道这很难
Okay, honey, look. I know that that was hard,
但是你做了正确的事
but you did the right thing.
-真的 -是我会想她的
- You really did. - Yeah. I'm gonna miss her.
不过好消息是我妈马上要回来了
Okay, but the good news is my mom will be back soon.
感觉好奇怪啊她对孩子太有一套了
It's just so weird. She was so good with the kids.
她那么上心你的指甲为什么是蓝的
She was so, so, so attentive. Why are your nail beds blue?
你知道吗
Oh, you know what?
这是最新的凯莉·詹娜指甲油
That's the new Kylie Jenner nail polish.
看起来就应该这么蠢
It's supposed to look stupid.
老天你被我抓了个正着
God, I caught you blue handed.
你陷害了那女的
You--you set that woman up?
戴维她不适合我们好吗
Look, David, she just wasn't the right fit for us, okay?
我只是我在说实话
That's just--I'm being honest.
你那天说应该让她
That's not what you said the other day
取代你♥妈♥的♥时候可不是这么说的
when you said we should ask her to replace your mother.
哦不所以你在那多久了
Oh, no. So how long have you been there?
足够久了兄弟
Long enough, man.
我是想过来告诉你们我好多了
I was stopping by to show you that I'm better.
我本来要做一个戏剧化的情景
I was going to do one of those dramatic moments
我看上去很绝望
where I look hopeless but then
但之后我从轮椅里站起来开始走动
I get up from my chair and walk.
好了我们很开心你好多了妈妈
Okay, well, we're really glad that you're better, Mom.
我的背本来好多了直到你给了我一刀
My back was better until you stabbed me in it.
你们俩既不诚实也不知道感恩
You two are dishonest and ungrateful
你狠狠地伤了我
and you have hurt me deeply.
我不干了我不会继续照看你的孩子了
So I quit. I'm not going to look after your children.
祝你好运
Good luck.
事儿是埃梅做的孩子也是我的孩子
Okay, Emet did this and they're my kids too
所以这不公平
so this seems unfair.
你也在这太好了
Wow, you're here, too. Great.
好吧很高兴见到你爱你
Okie-dokie. Good to see you. Love you.
我的人生完了
My life is over.
我觉得我们应该谈谈
I think we should talk.
老天我妈永远不会原谅我了
Oh, God. My mom's never gonna forgive me.
我是说我不知道你有没有明白
I mean, I don't know if you picked up on this--
她记起仇来比财迷还厉害
she holds grudges tighter than a handbag.
还担心你妈呢我都不知道我会不会原谅你
Oh, your mom? I mean, I don't know if I'm gonna forgive you.
你赶走了安娜·梅
You chased away Anna Mae--
我们遇到的最好的人
the best thing that ever happened to us.
亲爱的你看了路易写的故事了
Honey, you read Louie's story, okay?
我是想让她取代我妈
I--I thought I was replacing my mom.
而不是取代我自己
I didn't want to replace myself.
亲爱的这只是个故事
Sweetie, it's just a story.
是啊是我人生的故事
Yeah, it's a story of my life.
我和孩子们相处的时间已经由于工作
Look, my time with the kids is already cut in half
被减半了好吗
because of work, okay?
我很爱我的工作真的
And I love my job. I do.
我只是有时候有点内疚
I just feel a little guilty sometimes but at least
但至少我回到家能看到他们兴奋地说
I get to come home and see their excited faces saying,
耶妈妈回来了
"Yay, Mommy's home!"
我想做那个魔法仙女
I wanted to be the magic fairy.
你是他们的妈妈你永远是他们的魔法仙女
You're their mother. You'll always be their magic fairy
不过你是个有全职工作的仙女
but you are a magic fairy with a full time job
我也是所以我们得现实点
and so am I and we have to get real.
因为嫉妒你把让我们家庭幸福的人
Because of your jealousy, you pushed away someone
赶走了
who made our family happier.
-你还赶走了菜肉馅饼 -你说的对
- And you pushed away pot pie. - You're right.
我们得把她找回来
We gotta get her back.
当你让你生命中最棒的东西
When you let the greatest thing
离开你的时候
that's ever happened to you walk out of your life,
你只有一个选择
there's only one thing to do.
把孩子丢在游乐场里再把她找回来
Dump your kids at a play date and get her back.
我希望还来得及
I just hope it wasn't too late.
你好我知道我做错了真的知道了
Hi. Look, I know what I did was wrong. I do.
不仅如此我还意识到在失去某人之前
And even more than that, I realize you don't know
你并不知道你有多需要他们
how much you need someone until you lose them.
埃梅想说的是
What Emet is trying to say is,
我们需要你是的你