你走吧
You can go.
好的
Okay.
他的生命体征很好
His-- His vitals look good.
我就不打扰你们俩了
I'll-- I'll let you two have some time,
我在附近,有需要叫我
but I'll be close in case you need anything.
谢谢你带着我过来
Thank you for getting me here.
谢谢你听我说话,给我支持
And for listening to me. And being there for me.
如果可以,我会做更多
You know I would do more if I could.
我真的没事
I really am fine.
我当然很想他,我…
I mean, of course I miss him. I--
只是当孩子们在半夜醒来的时候
It's-- It's just really only when the kids wake up in the middle of the night.
我也没人可以倾诉…
And I don't have anyone to talk to. And--
总之,你帮了我很多
Anyway, you helped me more than you know.
我很乐意帮忙
Aw, I was glad to do it.
不过你也知道除了我,你还需要跟别人谈谈
But, uh, you know I wasn't the only one you had to talk with.
妈
-Mom? -Hi.
你感觉怎样?
How do you feel?
尼克呢?
Where's Nick?
已经接近软脑膜
Pia mater has been approximated.
请剪
Cut please.
等等,有出血
Wait. There's bleeding.
抽吸
Suction.
别抽吸,太脆弱了
Wait, no suction. No, it's too friable.
如果抽吸,脊椎神经组织可能会损失
If we suction, we could lose spinal nerve tissue.
-必须止血 -可以冲洗
-We need to stop the bleeding. -We can irrigate
然后用浸泡迪皮质醇的胶质绵
and then use Gelfoam soaked in dexamethasone.
安静点
Let's keep it quiet.
虽然今晚很累,但我们快收尾了
We know it's been a long night, but we're on the homestretch, okay?
-血止住了,请给我胶质绵 -需要硬膜贴片吗?
- Bleeding has stopped. Gelfoam, please. - Do you need a dural patch?
不用
No, I'm good.
我自己都不敢相信,可以准备闭合了
I can't believe I'm saying this, but we can prep to close.
-你办到了 -我们一起办到
-You did it. -We did.
好了,等结束后再开心还不迟
All right, wait to see that work before you start gloating up there.
好的,冲洗
- Hmm. - Okay. Irrigation.
顺利吗?
How'd it go?
很顺利,他醒来后会脱胎换骨
Good. Yeah. He's gonna wake up a new person.
这次能送他进手术室
I don't think we would have gotten him into the OR
全靠你上病床安抚他
if you hadn't jumped on the gurney when you did.
老实说,我平常是不会这么做的
Yeah, well, gotta be honest, it's not my usual strategy.
杜古医生
Uh-- Dr. Ndugu.
真的很抱歉,我稍早对你说了那些话
Um, I wanted to say that I am really sorry for what I said earlier.
那不只不恰当、不尊重,而且…
Not only was it inappropriate and disrespectful, but--
而且没说错
It was right.
我最近的工作表现确实不够好
I haven't been bringing my best self to work lately.
我的个人生活出了点状况,但那不是借口
Things in my personal life are complicated, but it's no excuse.
你无须跟我解释的
You-- You don't have to explain yourself to me.
我知道,但我是最酷的主治医生
No, I know. But I'm the coolest attending.
你今天做得很好
You did good work today.
你饿了吗?
You hungry?
餐厅的薯条挺好吃的
Cafeteria has pretty good fries.
你什么时候觉得自己是医生的?
When did you feel like you were a doctor?
不知道,也许住院实习两周后吧
I don't know. Maybe a couple of weeks into residency.
有人今晚叫我医生
Someone called me doctor tonight.
搭电梯的病人
Patient in the elevator.
他大概看到白袍就没多想
Guess he just saw the coat and assumed.
我没纠正他
I didn't correct him.
没关系
That's okay.
这叫鱼目混珠
It's a sham.
我都不知道自己算什么
Not even sure what I am anymore.
我这人只是…
I'm a guy just…
活得像行尸走肉
just going through the motions.
我搭轻轨上学
I take light-rail to school.
我每天早上都想着…
And every morning, I think…
如果我跌落在轨道上呢?
what if I just fell onto the tracks?
其他人都找到自己的路
Everyone else has it all figured out.
但我没找到
But I don't.
我不知道怎么承受这种生活,充满了…
I-I don't know how to live with all of the, um…
压力和痛苦?
Pressure and all the pain?
我也不知道
I didn't either.
很多人都不知道
A lot of people don't.
他们表现得怎样并不重要
Doesn't matter how they make it look.
你不孤单
You're not alone.
多数的时候
And on most days,
我仍不觉得自己像医生
I still don't feel like a doctor.
但我依然在这里
But I'm still here.
让我们帮你吧
Let us get you some help.
你有空吗?
Do you have a minute?
两天
Two days.
-什么?-我陪你的孩子两天
-Excuse me? -I've been with your kids for two days.
我带他们去学校、去练球和排演
I got them to school. I got them to practice and rehearsal.
照料他们吃跟睡
I made sure they ate, they slept.
有一个生病时
And when one of them felt sick,
我非常谨慎地带他过来
out of an abundance of caution, I brought him here.
我是可以在路上打给你
Now, yes, I guess I could have called on the way,
但我忙着安排你的保母
but I was busy making arrangements with your nanny
去照顾佐拉和艾莉丝
to take care of Zola and Ellis.
我的孩子生病,我不在现场
- My kid was sick, and I wasn't here. - Mm-hmm.
因此我感到很内疚
And I feel really guilty about that.
他们只有我了
I'm all they have.
不只有你
But you're not.
你当然是他们的母亲
I mean, yes, you're their mom. Of course.
但还有很多人爱着他们
But they have so many people that love them.
我不是他们的生父
Look, I know I'm not their father.
这我知道,但我很关心他们
I know that, but I care about them a lot.
-希望你能相信我这点 -我相信你
-And I want you to trust me with them. -I do trust you.
我感觉不像
It doesn't feel like it.
对不起
I'm sorry.
我慌了
I panicked.
我其实是来跟你道歉的
I actually came here to say I'm sorry.
因为我知道我慌了
Because I know I panic.
我也累了
And I was tired.
但我知道我说了一些
But I know that I said some things
可能没必要说出口的话
that were probably pretty unnecessary to say.
-所以… -有一两句
-So… -A few things.
好,我已经独自带小孩很久了
Okay. I've been doing this a long time alone,
所以我可能需要一点时间来调整
so it may just take me a minute to adjust.
过来
Hey, come here.
我有时间等你
Look, I got a minute.
好吗?
Okay?
好的
Okay.
我没怀孕
I'm not pregnant.
你会失望吗?
Are you disappointed?
我还想要一个孩子
I think I want another kid.
你不是说不想再生了吗?
I thought you said you didn't want biological kids.
本来不想,但这是跟你生的
I didn't, but this would be with you.
你不用现在决定
And you don't have to decide right now,
我也想等露娜大一点再说
and I wouldn't want to do it until Luna is a little bit older.
但我想把这件事做好
But I wanna do this right.
我们一起
Us.
所以我想让你知道我所有的想法
Which means I want you to know everything that's in my head.
不管那有多可怕
No matter how terrifying it might be.
如果你想一起生孩子,那…
If you want to have a baby together, then…
我愿意
I can get there.
但要给我一些时间
It's just gonna take me some time.
好的
Okay.
还得去接我们现有的孩子
We still have to pick up the babies we do have.
对
Right.
急诊
我满身呕吐味,还没空换衣服
I smell like puke and I haven't had time to change.
太累,没注意到
Mmm. Too tired to notice.
你派我去快速通道时
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