熟女镇（2009）

Cougar Town S04E13

Part 3 Dec. 8, 2020, 10:49 p.m.

You're stealing food right now.
你现在就在偷食物
That is not true.
这么说可不对
I will not leave the store with any of this.
我不会携带任何一样离开商店
Well, that's airtight bobby cobb logic right there.
这真是无懈可击的科布式逻辑
Hey, you're out of limes.
你这酸橙没了
Whoa, yikes! What the hell is that?
天哪怎么回事
From now on, my customers,
从现在开始我的客人们
I'm gonna have a good-natured smile on my face.
我会一直保持自然的笑容
What do you think?
你看怎么样
"Hi. May I wear your skin suit?"
你好我可以用你的皮套吗
Maybe you'll seem less creepy
也许你心里想点真正让你开心的事
if you think of something that actually makes you happy.
表情就没那么惊悚了
Remember when you were a model?
记得你做模特的时候吗
Good times. I'm still pretty hot.
多美好的时光我还是很火♥辣♥的
Damn it, I'm proud of my body.
我有身材我自豪
I'm proud of my butt. Feel your butt.
还有我的屁♥股♥ 摸摸你的屁♥股♥
That's your property. It's not weird.
这是你的财富摸也不奇怪
I don't know what you're thinking,
我不知道你在想什么
But it's like watching a gay porn with just one dude in it.
感觉就像在看单人的GV
Ah. There's the hate-filled look we've all grown to love.
我们都喜欢的满怀恨意的表情又回来啦
I've got to go. I owe andy an afternoon quickie.
我得走了我欠安迪一个午后的闪电爱爱
He told my cousin I died
他跟我堂兄说我死了
So I wouldn't have to go to the baby shower.
这样我就不用去参加他宝宝的洗礼了
That's sweet.
多贴心
I don't get it. Why isn't it working?
我不懂它怎么歇菜了
Andy quick, what was the b.S. You told trav?
安迪快点你怎么跟小崔说的啊
This happens to every guy. It's no big deal.
每个人都会碰到没什么关系
Huge deal!
关系大了
Don't be upset, boo.
别难过
Don't get me wrong -- this still counts
别理解错了我说话算数
'cause I'm ready and able.
我有空闲情愿奉陪
But if you can't do it, that's on you.
可如果你做不来那就不关我的事了
Come on!
不会吧
Seriously, come on!
不是吧
I have sympotence!
我同痿了
What? Sympotence!
什么同痿
You -- you couldn't get it up, and I'm an empath --
你不能勃起我感同身受
Sympathy impotence -- sympotence!
同情你的阳痿就同痿了
I didn't know you had people over.
我不知道你这有客人
All right, I'm going for the lip balm.
我要去偷唇膏了
I'm going to casually walk over there and take it.
我要和随意地走过去随意地拿起来
Then I'm gonna Tom Cruise-sprint the hell out of here.
然后就像阿汤哥一样飞奔出去
No, honey.I want you to act like you did when travis was born.
宝贝你要表现得像那会崔维斯刚出生时
Remember?
记得吗
You told me that he had a little cough
你跟我说他有点咳嗽
and they wouldn't let you see him right away.
但他们不让你见他
Right.
是的
So you want me to be quiet and stealthy.
你说要安静蹑手蹑脚
No one will know I'm taking my baby.
谁都不知道我把宝宝带走了
Okay. This is a go.
好的我要去了
Can't do it.
做不来
I was so close.
几乎快成功了
My heart was beating so fast, I just panicked.
我的心跳得太厉害了我很恐慌
I have to pee again, worse than ever.
我又想尿尿了超想
Excuse me! Can I look in your purse?
抱歉我能看下你的包吗
Of course you can.
当然了
I tried to steal something, but I couldn't.
我想偷东西来着不过没偷成
I'm gonna try again later. Not here. Maybe.
我会再尝试的不过也许不是在这
Oh, no, no. That's -- that's not mine.
不这不是我的
I told you I needed a new hairdryer.
我跟你说了我需要个吹风机
Right this way, ladies.
女士们这边走
Grocery-store jail? Seriously?
商店里的监狱不是吧
And that's when I knew my life would never be the same.
就在这时我知道我的人生从此与众不同
How can you be so calm? They're calling the cops.
你怎么这么平静他们叫警♥察♥了
They're gonna take us downtown!
他们会带走我们
You know, I can't ride in the backseat. I get carsick.
你知道的我不能坐后座我晕车
Insane, desperate thought coming in three, two, one...
愚蠢绝望的念头马上就来了三二一
How far are you willing to go sexually to get us out of here?
如果要靠出♥卖♥♥♥色相脱身你能卖♥♥到哪步
I say third base is where I draw the line.
我顶多到三垒
High-school third base
高中生的三垒
or naked-backstage-at-coachella third base?
还是柯契拉赤♥裸♥的幕后里的三垒
Well, they both sound horrible.
听起来都很可怕
P.S. -- Mumford is a very classy guy.
顺便说句蒙福是个很不错的人
The "Sons" -- not so much.
不过那个儿子就不怎么样了
come on, Richard, I'm still digesting!
得了吧理查德我还在消化呢
I mean, technically everything is still in the store.
理论上讲那些东西还在商点里
What's she doing?
她在干嘛
if you don't want to be someone's bitch,
如果不想被占便宜
You've got to get ripped.
就得锻炼得强壮点
Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!
加油加油
Look, not all bartenders are well-liked.
听着不是所有的酒保都很讨人喜欢
Why are you even here? Hmm?
你为什么还在这
All I ever wanted was a little place with my name on it
我只想要点属于自己的私人时间
Where people liked to hang out.
没有闲杂人等的私人空间
Is that all you ever wanted?
你就只是要这些
Oh, my god.
上帝啊
If I knew you'd be such a giant wuss about this,
早知道你是个这么懦弱的人
I would have never written that stuff.
我就不会那么写了
You're princess bridezilla?
你就是那个"猩娘公主"
Why? Why -- why would you torture me?
为什么非得折磨我
Eh. Andy needed a break.
总不能老埋汰安迪吧
We're surrounded by a sea of nice people --
我们周围都是好人
Jules, Trav, Andy.
茱尔斯小崔安迪
We're the only ones that hate people for no reason.
我们是唯一无缘无故厌恶别人的人
The gang needs us. We balance them out.
团队需要我们这样才能衬出他们的好
I do feel better about myself when I'm judging others.
找别人茬的时候我确实感觉很好
It works for you. I think it's kind of sexy.
你就是这样的人我觉得很性感
Yeah?
是吗
Yeah. I'd do you.
没错我愿意上你
You know, if Jules and Andy died in a car crash.
如果茱尔斯和安迪车祸死掉的话
Or if just Jules died.
或者茱尔斯死掉就行了
Just be who you are.
做你自己吧
Thanks.
谢了
Excuse me! Those grapes aren't free. Sorry.
不好意思这不是免费葡萄抱歉
Sorry you're a grown man who wears a name tag.
抱歉你个大男人还得带名牌
I didn't mean to go back to your original self that second.
我又没说要你马上变回原形
Shh! There's no talking in grocery-store jail.
肃静商店监狱里不许说话
You haven't stopped since we got here.
从我们进来你就一直没停嘴
I found an old box of old pudding cups.
我找到一盒过期布丁
Anybody want in?
有人想吃吗
I wonder if this is the worst moment of my life this year
这是我今年最囧的时刻呢
or if it's the worst moment ever.
还是我这辈子最囧的时刻
So, let's talk about what's going on with you, sexually.
我们来讨论一下你的性生活吧
Ever.
这辈子的
Okay, we fix you, we fix me, right?
我们先治你再治我好吗
So I called in a doctor.
我找了个医生
Hey, Trav. All right, lose the pants.
小崔脱裤子吧
Let's see the noodle.
来瞧瞧小面条咋样了
I couldn't even steal lip balm. I'm so lame.
连唇膏都不敢偷我真笨
I bet everyone's thinking about what a dork I am.
大家一定都觉得我特傻
I wonder if Trav's butt is more pale
我在想小崔的屁♥股♥
than the rest of his body, but is that even possible?
比他身子还白吗还可能更白吗
Man, I shouldn't have eaten so much of that tuna fish and those puddin' cups,
我真不该吃那么多吞拿鱼和布丁
and then they're to nothing rum-a-tums.
现在它们搅和的稀里呼噜
What the hell did I just think?
我刚在想啥
Wow. I wish I had Bobby's beautiful eyes.
真希望我能有鲍比那双美眼
His eyes with my face and body
他的电眼我的脸蛋和身材
would cause a total panty tsunami.
绝对能让小妞们湿裤
I love all these people so much, but I'll never tell them.
我好爱这群人但我绝不会说的
I love you, too, Ellie.
我也爱你艾莉