辛普森一家
The Simpsons S28E18
Part 2
Feb. 2, 2020, 12:10 p.m.
没有什么比来自奖杯乐园的奖杯
Nothing but a genuine Trophyland trophy says
对孩子们而言...
to your kids that...
*你是最棒的*
*You're the best around*
*没有什么能打倒你*
*Nothing's gonna ever keep you down*
*你是最棒的*
*You're the best around*
*没有什么能打倒你*
*Nothing's gonna ever keep you down*
*你是最棒的*
*You're the best around*
*没有什么能打倒你*
*Nothing's gonna ever keep you down*
*你是最棒的*
*You're the best around*
奖杯
*没有什么能打倒你*
*Nothing's gonna ever keep you down*
真正成就的流失
丽莎·辛普森
*你是最棒的*
*You're the best around*
*没有什么能打倒你*
*Nothing's gonna ever keep you down*
*你是最棒*
*You're the best.*
无论孩子做什么这些愚蠢的盲爱的家长们
These stupid, loving parents will buy trophies
都会买♥♥奖杯给他们
for any accomplishment.
没有尿床奖 不大声喧哗奖
Not wetting the bed, using your inside voice,
甚至还有"去别的房♥间看电视奖"
even "Go watch TV in the other room."
我仍认为这些东西对他们建立自尊心有帮助
I still think these things are good for their self-esteem.
更别提一沓钞票建立的自尊心了
Not to mention the self-esteem that comes from wad riffling.
看啊 我甚至能支使巴仔工作了
Look, I even put the boy to work.
好吧 他应该为此得到一个奖杯
Well, then he should get a trophy for that.
在我们奖杯行业有句老话
We have a saying in the participation trophy business.
想建立高度自尊心
"Don't get high-- self-esteem--
别拿自家奖杯垫脚
on your own supply-- of self-esteem."
我不在乎 我要把这个给他
I don't care. I'm giving him this.
什么情况 怎么断了
What? Why did it break?
这些部件都是质量最好的
The parts are of the highest quality.
来自比中国还中国的 印度
They come from the China of China: India.
儿子 你是用泡泡糖粘合得奖杯吗
Boy, did you glue this trophy together with bubblegum?
黏糊糊的不好整 我去休息了
Eh, sticky is sticky. I'm taking my break.
看到没 给他奖杯根本没效果
See? Giving him trophies did nothing.
你用鼓励赞美沐浴他
You've showered him with praise,
而他还是和以前一样懒
and he's just as lazy as ever.
嘘 万一他听到了怎么办
Shh! What if he heard you say that?
如果巴仔偷听的水平和他做别的事
Hey, if Bart is as bad at eavesdropping
一样差劲
as he is at everything else,
那我们没什么可担心的
we've got nothing to worry about.
要我说我们继续高谈阔论
I say we keep talking loudly.
那他的自信心怎么办
But what about his confidence?
面对现实吧 我们儿子就是个渣渣
Face it. Our son is a screw-up.
他生来就是渣渣 无论他再怎么努力
He was born a screw-up, and no matter how hard he tries--
他永远不会努力的
which he never will--
巴仔永远都只是个渣渣
Bart will always be a screw-up.
你听到过他难过时候发出的那种声音吗
And have you ever heard that sound he makes when he's sad?
真可悲
Pathetic.
春田退休老人城♥堡♥
皇后的象"止泻宁"吃掉国王的"安定文"
Queen's bishop Lomotil takes king's Ativan.
看来晚上我要在厕所
Oh, looks like I'll be having a panic attack
惊恐发作了
on the toilet tonight.
看那个呜咽的小哭包
Look at that whimpering little crybaby.
亚伯 那是你孙子
Abe, that's your grandson.
过来看看我吧
Come visit me!
我多么孤单啊
I'm so lonely!
你怎么这么沮丧 孩子
What's got you down, kiddo?
我老爸说我什么都做不好
My dad says I'm terrible at everything.
他只是在重复小时候我对他说的话
Oh, he's just repeating what he heard as a boy from me.
我是个糟糕的父亲 和我老爸一样
Oh, I was an awful father, just like my old man.
你♥爸♥爸也不相信你吗
Your dad didn't believe in you, either?
那不是他的错
It wasn't his fault.
他只是专注在事业上
He was just focused on his career
他是名揍小孩专家
as a professional child-beater.
人们会穿过五个镇子
Men would come from five towns over
辛普森教授对付熊孩子们的灵丹妙药
前来学习我父亲的技巧
to study my father's technique.
但无论他注册了多少项掐脖子专利
But no matter how many strangles he patented,
都没能获得他父亲的认可
his father never approved.
尽管只有极少次是我确实搞砸了
Even if only a little bit of that really happened,
但我永远都逃不出失败者的命运了
I'll never escape being a loser.
这是失败者的借口
That's loser talk!
你是个很棒的孩子 我证明给你看
You're a great kid, and I'm gonna prove it to you.
孩子 这是枚真奖杯
Boy, this here's a real trophy.
我们家族最珍贵的资产
Our family's most prized possession:
鲍蒙特卓越精准计时器
a Baumont Chrono-master Elite.
这是辛普森家族的传家宝
It's been a Simpson heirloom
从1982年在葛底斯堡的一具尸体上被偷走开始
ever since it was stolen off a dead body at Gettysburg.
一直都是
In 1982.
等等 这是在用另一个金光闪闪的东西
Wait. Is this just another gold shiny thing
愚弄我吗 让我误以为自己很特别
to trick me into feeling special when I'm not?
你就是很特别
You are special!
你就像我的前列腺一样
You're like my prostate--
一个易怒的麻烦制♥造♥精 自行其是
a spiky little troublemaker who plays by his own rules.
出自音乐剧《Over Here》
歌♥曲《Don't Shoot the Hooey to Me, Louie》
不要听信路易的胡言乱语
You don't take hooey from Louie.
过去不会 将来也不会
Never have, never will.
我感受到了
I feel something.
像是体内有烈火一般
It's like a sunburn on the inside.
那是"自豪"
It's called "Pride."
每一次的滴答声都提醒着你
Every tick will remind you
你拥有着爷爷对你的信任
you've got a grandpa who believes in you.
就像我相信
The same way I believe
养老院已经被机器人占领了
the retirement home has been taken over by robots.
我不是机器人
I am not a robot.
我只是穿了双会闪光的运动鞋
I just have light-up sneakers.
2年级数学竞赛
为什么我的奖杯最小
Why is my trophy the smallest?
我把你们都打败了
You all lost-- to me!
丽莎 你是在说我们歧视优秀的人吗
Lisa, are you suggesting we engage in excellence bias?
她在嘲讽我弱智
She's loser-shaming me.
人人都是赢家
你为什么总是惹麻烦 你个小女妖
Why do you always have to make trouble, ya wee harpy?
家长们都在盲目跟风
How am I supposed to stay silent
我要如何安之若素
when parents are just blindly chasing the latest trend?
家长
Ugh, parents.
都是些懒惰的饭桶
Those lazy lunch-packers.
他们只会人云亦云
They just want to be told what to do.
偏偏愿意发表意见的专家又很多
And there's no shortage of experts who want to tell 'em.
怎么那么多专家
No shortage of experts.
专家 专家 专家
Experts. Experts. Experts.
好主意
另一个育儿专家
Another parenting expert, eh?
今晚 芬顿·普托埃博士 退化 美国儿童的弱化
显然这是一个被奖杯
Clearly, this is a community in the grip
沉迷症所控制的社区
of an addiction to trophies.
现在 家长们
Now, parents,
警告你们 太多的赞扬造就了千禧一代
I warn you, too much praise creates millennials--
一代软弱 自恋
a generation of soft, entitled narcissists,
退学去当打碟师的孩子
who drop out of college to become deejays.
那玩意只有打得非常棒才能挣到大钱
That only pays well at the very highest levels.
不要再给你们的孩子送礼物了
Instead of showering your kids with gifts,
你们应该通过磨砺来激励他们走向成功
you should prod them to greatness with GRIT.
站起来 再试一次
Get up. Retry.
我不管你是不是
I don't care if you're...
累了
Tired.
他用一堆别的词组了个新词
He's got a word made of other words.
他一定是个专家
He must know what he's talking about.
终于不用再整天赞美了
Oh, it is an end to praise.
赞美毗湿奴
Praise Vishnu.
记住 磨砺也代表着
Remember, GRIT also stands for:
丢掉那些愚蠢的奖杯
Get Rid of Idiotic Trophies.
又一个词中词 他太牛了
Another word word! He did it again!
为什么首字母缩略词有时候带"的"
Why does the word "Of" Sometimes count in the acronym
有时候不带
辛普森一家
The Simpsons
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