辛普森一家
The Simpsons S28E05
Part 3
Feb. 2, 2020, 12:05 p.m.
超帅
Impressive!
意大利的吗
Italian?
比那还好
Better.
康涅狄格的
Connecticut!
我要去找老伯恩斯 跟他说
Yeah, I think I'm gonna go into old man Burns and say,
"我才是...领袖"
"Here is a leader of men... and women."
穿成这样了 肯定得这么说
'Cause that's what you have to say now.
五指击掌 哥们
High five, man!
我们就有四根手指 还怎么给人"五"
Why do we call it "High five" when we only have four fingers?
我一直在思考这个问题
You know, I've always wondered that.
让我看看这个样品
Oh, what have we here?
丽莎 这些小瓶子里都是甲醛
Uh, Lisa, these vials are filled with formaldehyde.
甲醛 你们知道那东西吗
Formaldehyde! Do you understand?
千万别吸入
Do not imbibe!
好的 不要吸入
Check. No imbibing.
巴仔 吃就是吸入 甲醛是有毒的
Bart! Imbibing is eating, and formaldehyde is poison.
你把吃毒的乐趣都搞毁了
Oh, you take all the fun out of eating poison.
你就是在维护阿壳
You're just an apologist for Krusty.
阿壳才没花钱让我维护他
I am not a paid apologist for Krusty!
我可没提到"钱"
I didn't say "Paid."
我得走了 未来再见
Got to go. I'll see you in the future.
那只是我的泳衣烘干机
Uh, that's just my bathing suit dryer.
第六频道新闻
派依每天两次与您相见
抱歉 小姑娘 我们对你的故事不感兴趣
Sorry, kid, not interested in your story.
新闻部主任
阿壳是我的们的宠儿
Krusty's our biggest star,
甲醛场是我们最大的赞助商
and formaldehyde's our biggest sponsor.
看来我得用野路子了
I'm gonna have to go off the grid.
网路
被007剧组淘汰的100位演员
唐纳德·特朗普未羞辱过的20个人
有关这六样东西
你所不知道的六件事
当英国女王遇见鳄鱼
结果会让你捧腹大笑
肯特·布罗克曼 欢迎来到网路
All right, Kent Brockman. Welcome to BizzFad.
我们简直敲个不停
We are so crunched.
敲个不停是彼此的
Well, the crunching is mutual.
"敲个不停是彼此的" 这话什么意思
"The crunching is mutual"? What the hell does that mean?
我知道如今媒体已经变样了
Well, I know that the media has changed,
但这传统的播音员嗓音还是很有市场的
but this old newshound can still find his way home.
是...吗
Okay...
我可以给你们读一下如今全部的
I thought I might do a piece on all the crazy ice cream flavors
古怪冰淇淋口味
they have these days.
培根味 真的好吃吗
Bacon? Really?
肯特 我真的很欣赏你
Kent, I like it. I do.
但我们刚刚破产了
But we just went bankrupt.
大伙们 你们都被解雇了
Uh, people, people, you're all fired.
但说真的 这四天过得很美好
But, seriously, it's been a great four days.
谢谢你们
Thank you.
先生们 我提议加大产量
Uh, gentlemen, I suggest we ramp up production.
我口袋里写好了几条建议
I have a few suggestions right here in my pocket.
加油 侯默 加油 加油
Do it, Homer! Yeah, yeah, yeah!
你是欲望吗
Are you Lust?
不 我是狼疮
No. Lupus.
胖子
Hey, fatso,
快把那肥帐篷合上 不然该进蚊子了
I'd close that tent flap before the mosquitoes get in.
罗德·卢因
怎么这样...
What the...?
我以为你能喜欢呢
I thought you would like it.
说真的 快把你偷的这块油布
Actually, I think you should take this tarp
送回到棒球场去吧
back to the baseball stadium you got it from.
以防下雨延迟比赛
In case there's a rain delay.
黑得真棒 先生
I did not see that coming, sir.
滚蛋吧 辛普森
Off you go, Simpson.
别再琢磨着改头换面了
Never seek to better yourself again.
我要朝你后背踹一脚让你记牢
I'm just going to shove my foot on your back for emphasis.
是的 先生 我知道了
Yes, sir. I understand.
但能不能别弄脏我的外套
But could you try not to get my new jacket dirty?
抱歉 不能
Sorry, but no.
干得漂亮 先生
Well done, sir.
轮到你了 史密瑟斯
Now your turn, Smithers.
真没想到你也会赏我一脚
I never thought you'd ask.
你为什么要把这新闻给布罗克曼
So, why do you want to give the story to Brockman?
最美好的做法就是给毫无希望之人
Because the best thing you can do is offer a lifeline
扔出救命的绳索
to a person with no hope.
我在这
Here I am!
不好意思 没说你
Sorry, not you.
谢天谢地
Thank God!
你怎么知道布罗克曼在哪
Well, how do you know where Brockman will be?
要寻找一个堕落之人
To find a fallen man,
就要去他走向人生巅峰的地方找
you must visit the scene of his highest peak.
他报道2009年洪水的地方
When he reported on the flood of '09.
我的事业和洪水曾同时在此达到巅峰
My career and these flood waters crested at the same time.
肯特·布罗克曼在此用啤酒瓶
This is Kent Brockman blowing a sad song
献上一曲哀歌♥
on his beer bottle.
布罗克曼先生 我们发现了一件大事
Mr. Brockman, we've uncovered a huge story!
我们需要一个真正的新闻记者去报道
And we need a real newsman to break it wide open.
5点 6点 11点 肯特·布罗克曼为您播报世界新闻
激光脱毛
真正的新闻记者
A real newsman, eh?
那你们来错地方了
Then you've come to the wrong corner.
什么意思
What do you mean?
我已经过气了
Oh, I'm through.
请让我保留我最后的尊严离开
Now, please, let me just go out with my remaining dignity intact.
肯特·布罗克曼现在充满了黑暗和自杀的想法
This is Kent Brockman thinking dark and suicidal thoughts.
穷困潦倒的角落很安静
It's quiet here in the gutter.
非常安静
Very quiet.
本来很安静
Well, it was.
前主持人互助小组会议
我们稍后不回来
好 今天谁先开始
Okay, who would like to start today?
有吗 有吗
Anyone? Anyone?
拜托
Oh, come on.
3 2...
In three, two...
我身处互助小组会议现场...
I'm here live at the support group...
我们今天主要感觉...
Our top feeling today...
刚收到消息 我很难过
This just in: I'm sad.
你们知道吗 我经常开车兜着风
You know, I'll be tooling around,
结果就变成演讲技巧的练习
and I'll just constantly lapse into my elocution exercises.
"警报过后 洛克希德公♥司♥的L-1011
"A Lockheed L-1011 landed safely
在路易斯安那州波加路撒安全降落"
in Bogalusa, Louisiana, after an alert."
我也是
Oh, I've been there.
-真是 -不错
- Too true. - Courage.
肯特你安静沉思得不像个主持人啊
Kent, you're looking unusually thoughtful and silent for an anchor.
我以为我要接受
You know, I thought I'd come to terms
离开新闻圈的生活 但突然
with life off the news cycle, and then, bang,
我接到了一个独家新闻的机会
I was offered a scoop on a platter.
你有没有直接像猛兽一样逮住线索
Well, did you leap on that lead like a lion on a lemur?
我拒绝了 我说"我是..."
I passed! As in, "I am a thing of the..."
丹拉瑟 除了这个美味的自♥制♥圆环蛋糕
Dan Rather, do you have something to contribute
你有没有什么事情可分享呢
besides this delicious homemade Bundt cake?
肯特 你为什么要做这个
Kent, why are you doing this?
为什么你要加入这一行
Why did you get into this business?
为了钱 女人 免费咖啡 老一套
Money, women, free coffee. The usual.
拜托 现在 这种真实无添加的故事
Sir, if you please, these days, a bona fide uncorrupted story
比穿运动鞋的蛇还少见
is rarer than a snake with sneakers.
比黄额园丁鸟更少见
It's harder to find than a yellow-fronted bowerbird.
抓住线索
Jump on it, hoss,
跟踪线索直到榨出结果
and ride till Gramma churns the buttermilk.
那就到了庆贺的时候
That's when the barn dance starts.
这是什么感觉
What is that feeling?
是正直吗
Is it integrity?
很高兴见到你们 哥们 我加入
Good to see ya, buddy. I'm in!
有谁有眼线和粉饼
Anybody got eyeliner and pancake makeup?
用我的吧 哥们
Take mine, brother.
特别适合地中海人的肌肤
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