辛普森一家
The Simpsons S28E10
Part 1
Feb. 2, 2020, 12:06 p.m.
《辛普森一家》
第28季 第10集
史密瑟斯 放圣诞猎犬
Smithers, release the Christmas hounds.
*圣诞佳节 有人遭殃*
* All is not well, on this noel *
*提姆神父看起来很糟*
* It's looking grim for Reverend Tim *
春田第一教堂
祝大家安好
停车不放酸奶就拖走
*这个季节他应该很忙*
* This should be his very busy season *
*没有人来 告诉我到底为什么*
* No one's coming, tell me what's the reason *
*他会怎么做 找个座位坐*
* What will he do, pull up a pew * ?
*我们都在道别 盼着迪斯科司徒*
* As we bid adieu, look for Disco Stu. *
一般来说 降临节这里应该挤满了人
Usually, the Fourth Sunday of Advent is packed.
希望神父不会失去原有的水准
I hope the Reverend isn't losing his touch.
跟野兽男孩相比三智者
Comparing the Three Wise Men to the Beastie Boys
野兽男孩 美国说唱组合
看起来绝望要多于时髦 我是说真的
seemed more desperate than hip. I'm serious.
三智者 耶稣出生时从东方前来朝圣送礼的三个贤人
他们的礼物代表了尊贵与圣洁
就连苗浩斯都能投进去
Even Milhouse could've made that.
什么事 海伦
What is it, Helen?
提姆 我想应该告诉你一声
Uh, well, Tim, just thought you should know,
有一个很特殊的粉丝团在等着和你谈话
a very special fan club is waiting to talk to you.
围了半圈 什么情况
A semi-circle? What gives?
内德 爱涅
Ned? Agnes?
梅尔 教区牧师
Mel? The Parson?
没错 你的上级
That's right, your boss.
我来向你介绍一下我的上级
And I'd like to introduce you to my boss,
主教
the Patriarch.
其实 教区牧师 我们的上级是一样的
Actually, Parson, we all have the same boss.
大主教
The Metropolitan.
也是他让我们来此相聚
And it is his will that we come together here for...
进行神圣的干预
a divine intervention.
什么时候黑皮诺里掺维柯丁
Look, since when is it a crime
变成犯罪了
to mix Pinot Noir and Vicodin?
黑比诺 葡萄酒的一种
维柯丁 一种止疼药
我们才不会在乎你会不会因为
Oh, we don't care if you wreck your liver
桑塞尔白葡萄酒和对乙酰氨基酚而爆肝
with Sancerre and acetaminophen.
你可以像吃葡萄干一样嗑药
You can pop pain pills like cran-raisins for all we care.
我们来这是因为你没有让教堂满座
We're here 'cause you're not packing the p-p-p-pews.
这座教堂比做完烤薄饼早餐后
The church is emptier than a syrup bottle
剩下的糖浆瓶还要空
after a pancake breakfast.
大家总有不来聚会的理由
Oh, people have reasons to miss mass.
附近有流感啦 新买♥♥的吉普车还在经销商那里啦
There's flu going around, the new Jeeps are in at the dealership.
有很多新特色 前面竖了一块大屏幕...
Lot of new features, the big screen up front, where...
不仅仅是出席率 神父
It's not just attendance, Reverend.
有时你讲话的时候 我的思维就会开小差
It's that sometimes when you speak, my mind wanders,
飞到非宗教领域
to, uh, non-religious areas.
提姆西 承认吧 你陷入了低潮期
Timothy, admit it. You're in a slump.
今年你自己让多少人改变信仰
How many souls have you personally converted
信我们的教
to our faith this year?
负六人
Negative six.
革命尚未成功
You have some converting to do.
我还没有听说过呢
I haven't been heard from!
你想说什么
And what do you have to say?
没什么
Nothing!
就是提一提
Just pointing it out.
好吧 我只能这样了
Okay, I can do this.
我是个好人
I'm a good man.
而春田镇是个很好的基♥督♥教社区
And Springfield is nothing if not a good Christian community.
异教♥徒♥冬季嘉年华
雕刻画像
立等可取
手♥机♥石阵
僧侣落水机
太阳神诅咒坑
我对这个节日感到担忧
I'm worried about this festival.
就好像在大学城看到那些
It's like something you'd see in a college town. ?
来啊 妈妈
Come on, Mom,
诅咒永恒
非永久纹身
跟上异教♥徒♥的脚步
get with the pagan agenda.
杰克冻人的冰雪花♥园♥
这只狗狗喜欢我
This doggy likes me.
别着急 拉尔菲 我来把你给射下来
Don't worry, Ralphie, I'll shoot you off of there.
快来吧 大伙 我们去看看
Come on guys, let's go check out
今年的特色景点
this year's feature attraction:
沙滩怪人
the Strandbeest.
沙滩怪人
风力发动雕像
这是风力发动的
Powered by the wind!
这是科技还是垃圾
Is this science, or garbage?
荷兰艺术品
Dutch art. ?
这肯定是出于环保意识
And I'll bet it's environmentally conscious.
不 并不是
No. It is not.
是个活的
It's alive!
风有些变大了
The wind is picking up slightly.
这是个灾难
This is a disaster!
这个怪人是在欧洲的微风下建造的
The Beest is built for the polite breezes of Europe.
救救我 奥丁[北欧主神]
Save me, Odin.
瞧 爸爸 我能倒着滑
Look, Dad, I can skate backwards!
真棒 索菲 只是要当心沙滩怪人
Great, Sophie! Just watch out for Strandbeests!
怎么回...
What the...?
春田镇综合医院
最好的圣诞礼物
你的器官
好吧 我得提醒你
Okay, I got to warn ya.
普通的吗♥啡♥对我不管用了
Regular morphine doesn't work on me anymore.
打这个电♥话♥他们会把我需要的东西送来
Call this number and they'll send the stuff I need.
上面会写着 "大象专用" 但是别在意
It'll say "For elephants," but ignore that.
很抱歉 索菲
Sorry about this, Sophie.
这事来得太不凑巧了
Couldn't have come at a worse time.
我每年才有这一个星期的抚养权
I only get one week of custody, once a year.
《阿壳的抚养日历》
没关系 爸爸 我们在这个
It's okay, Dad. We'll get to know each other
半私人的房♥间了解彼此吧
in this semi-private room.
我给你们全私人空间
Oh, I'll give you all the privacy you need.
哈罗德
Harold?
私人房♥间
Private room!
那么
So,
你的表演怎么样了
uh, how's your act coming along?
我不在娱乐圈了
I'm not in show business.
你这熊孩子搞砸什么了
What kind of a screwed-up kid are you?
我没有搞砸 我成绩很好
I'm not screwed up. I get good grades.
我会吹圆号♥
I play the French horn.
很好 很好
Good, good.
你知道 有人边吹裤子边掉
You know, it's funny when someone's playing it
很搞笑
and their pants fall down.
我还没这样过
I haven't had that happen.
不用难过
Well, don't feel bad.
这个梗其实挺难弄的
It's actually a pretty complicated rig.
整个以斯帖记卷轴是个大杂烩
The whole megillah is a big tzimmes.
大杂烩 以斯帖记
Tzimmes? Megillah?
是犹太语
It's Yiddish.
是我们混账人的语言
The language of our fakakta people.
我妈教我信基♥督♥教
Mom raised me Christian.
基♥督♥徒
A Christian?
那个刻薄的非犹太人
That farbissina shiksa.
你怎么能无视这些犹太人的
How can you ignore the sacred traditions
神圣传统
of the Jewish people?
阿壳 这是你的培根龙虾非洁食三明治
Krusty, here's your bacon, lobster and tref sandwich.
这应该挂在骆驼的一侧送来
Hey, it was supposed to come with a side of camel.
特大偶蹄类动物
Extra cloven.
爸 你不用这样逗我开心
Dad, you don't have to be sort of funny with me.
关键在于 我想和你一起庆祝这一时刻
The thing is, I want to celebrate this time with you.
亲爱的 我知道你在拉近我们的关系
Sweetie, I know you're reaching out.
但对我来说 圣诞节就只是普通的一天
But to me, Christmas is just another day.
我通常都是和一个好出版商腻在一起
I usually curl up with a good bookmaker, and...
好吧
Well...
要不你俩和我们一起过圣诞
Why don't the two of you spend Christmas with us?
我家虽然简陋 但也愿意多请俩人
Our home isn't fancy, but we'd love to set a place for two more.
马姬 我们同意了
辛普森一家
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