明迪烦事多（2012）
The Mindy Project S04E15
Part 1
April 29, 2021, 2 p.m.
So, I've never been set up by my Postmates before,
我还是第一次让同城快递员做媒
but it makes sense because I see Carlos F. Almost every night.
不过也说得通啦 毕竟几乎每晚都能看到Carlos F
Yeah, Carlos is cool.
是啊 Carlos人很好
Hey, man, the show is down here.
嘿 老兄 你要关注的对象在下面
Right, right. So Carlos mentioned that you--
对对对 Carlos说你
Yes! And one! I'm gonna go.
太好了 进了 我还是走吧
If I wanted to be treated badly at a wings place,
要是我想在啃鸡翅的地方找罪受
I'd go by the one by my house where I don't tip.
我就去我家旁边那家了 还不用付小费
Well, wait, I-I-I'm sorry.
等下 我很抱歉
Truth is, I haven't been on a date in a while.
其实 我已经很久没和人约会了
I'm a bit rusty, and right now,
有点生硬 这会儿
we are in the middle of a category five Sportz-icane.
正好是5类体育比赛大放送
What's a Sportz-icane?
什么体育比赛大放送
It's a day when a bunch of great sporting events happen at the same time,
在这天很多体育比赛都发生了大事件
and we've got a game seven in the NHL,
像国家冰球联盟七连赛的最后一场
Lebron versus Kobe, and the biggest MMA fight of all time,
还有Lebron对战Kobe 和史上最激烈的综合格斗赛事
Kobe科比 指Kobe Bryant 前美国男子职业篮球运动员 曾效力湖人队
Lebron 指Lebron James 美国男子职业篮球运动员 效力骑士队
Soto Diaz versus Diaz Soto.
Soto Diaz对战Diaz Soto
I actually kind of like MMA.
其实我还挺喜欢综合格斗的
I think it's cute when those guys 69 each other.
把自己和对手弄成69式的时候还挺萌的
Here. Come over here and sit on my side.
来吧 坐我边上
I'll explain everything, and, uh,
我给你做讲解
I'll be so busy yammering away
而且 我会光顾着捶胸顿足
that you can have all the wings.
鸡翅就都归你了
Okay. Okay.
好吧好吧
Oh, that was very interesting.
真有意思啊
I did not know that they held sporting events at Madison Square Garden.
我都不知道麦迪逊广场花♥园♥还能办体育比赛
I thought that's just where Billy Joel lived, so...
我以为那儿只是Billy Joel住的地方
Um, well, this is me.
到我家啦
You know, it started off bad, but I had a really nice time.
虽然一开始有点糟 但是我过得很开心
I had a really nice time too. It was fun, right?
我也是 还挺有趣儿的 对吧
I mean, even though you choked on a wing
虽然你被鸡翅卡了
and I had to give you the Heimlich maneuver.
我不得不给你做海姆立克急救法
Yeah, sorry about that. I'm just such a foodie.
是哦 真是不好意思 我太能吃了
No, I liked it.
别这么说 我喜欢
I mean, I got to cop a feel on the first date, you know?
第一次约会就占了点小便宜
Well, I have delivered you safely to your apartment.
我已经把你安全送到家了
I'm not gonna make it weird and ask to come in.
我也不想搞得太尴尬 要求进你家
You can come in. I'd love for you to come in.
你可以进来啊 热烈欢迎
Easy, tiger.
别太猴急了
Maybe I've earned myself a nighttime date?
我可以再约你晚上出来吗
Definitely. Well...
当然 那就好
Morgan, I had the best date.
Morgan 今天的约会太完美了
He's cute, he made sports tolerable,
他超可爱 有他在 体育比赛都变得能看了
he paid for three figures' worth of chicken wings.
他还付了三位数的鸡翅钱
See, I told you, it's not impossible to date as a single mother.
我就讲吧 单身妈妈也是可以约会的
Oh, my God, I'm a mom.
老天啊 我是个当妈的
I didn't tell him I have a kid.
我忘告诉他我有个娃了
Did you tell him about me?
你有和他说到我吗
No, of course not.
当然没有
Okay. Don't cry. Come on, that's not--
拜托 别哭 别这样 没什么
Don't encourage him.
别煽动他
Hey, guys. How do I tell a man that I am dating that I have a kid?
各位 我要怎么和约会对象说 我有个娃
How many children does he have? None.
对方有几个娃 一个都没
Well, then it doesn't matter how you tell him, because it's over.
那你怎么说都无所谓了 反正都得分
What? I don't know.
什么 不好说哦
I think I would date a woman with a child.
我倒是愿意和有孩子的女性约会
Thank you.
多谢支持
A female child, though. What?
不过得是个女娃 什么
Well, if it was a boy, it would only be a matter of time
如果是个男孩儿的话 等他长大
before he was big enough to kill me.
迟早有天会把我♥干♥掉的
Yeah, I could totally see a little boy killing Dr. Reed.
我眼前已经浮现出一个小男孩干掉Reed医生的画面了
Right? Yeah, for sure.
对吧 没错儿
Oh, my God, you guys don't know what you're talking about.
天哪 你们别胡说八道了
Kurt Russell got with Goldie Hawn when she had two kids.
Goldie Hawn有俩孩子 Kurt Russell还是和她在一起了
Goldie Hawn 美国著名女演员 导演 监制 曾获奥斯卡最佳女配角和金球奖最佳女配角
Kurt Russell 美国好莱坞知名一线电影演员 动作片演员
Well, with all due respect, Mindy is no Goldie Hawn in "Overboard."
没别的意思啊 不过Mindy可不是<落水情缘>里的Goldie Hawn
How dare you? I have fallen off of several ships.
瞎说 我从好几条船上掉下去过呢
Hey, man, you're out of line.
你说得有点过了
Yeah, this one has a child, all right?
咱们这位有孩子 是吧
But, maybe there's something wrong with this guy.
但也许那位也不是什么好东西
He could be ugly or deformed or have a scarred penis.
说不定他长得丑 畸形 丁丁上有伤疤
No, stop. I thought you were going to say that
别说了 我还以为你会说
it didn't matter because Leo's such a great kid
我有孩子也没关系 因为我儿子Leo特别棒
and anyone would be lucky to be around him.
任何人都应该为能接近他而感到三生有幸
Leo's okay.
也就那样吧
All right, that sucked. Honest. Just honest.
你好烦 实话实说
Colette, you need to get your ass in there and fix this.
Colette 你必须得进去 把话说明咯
I am all in. If you bail on me, I'm ruined.
我把自己搭进去了 你要是放弃 我就废了
Hey! What the hell's going on in here?
嘿 你们在里面吵什么玩意儿
Beverly's trying to sleep out there.
Beverly在外面睡觉啊
Sorry. Okay, okay, listen.
对不起 听我说
Colette and I have decided to move in together,
我和Colette本来决定同居了
and now this one is bailing.
现在这货想临阵逃跑
I know, I just--I have a hard time telling my brother that I got to move out
我知道 但我就是没法儿告诉我哥我要搬出去
'cause he's really protective of me.
他真的对我保护过度
Okay, okay, I'm sorry.
好吧 怪我
I didn't realize that you were gonna have to have
我没想到你和你哥说这个事儿
a difficult conversation with your bother.
会这么困难
Thank you. I'm so sorry.
多谢理解 全怪我
I mean, 'cause I went to see my grandmother,
要知道 我去见了我奶奶
the woman who saw me through prison and my soda addiction,
那位看着我出狱 戒掉碳酸饮料的女士
and I told her I'm out of here, yo, bitch.
我却告诉她 老子要搬走了 贱♥人♥
Why would you do that?
你为什么要这么做
'Cause I was hopped up on Sprite. 'Cause I'm using again.
因为我喝雪碧喝上瘾了 又上瘾了
Hey, Colette. Yes.
嘿 Colette 怎么了
Forget Jody. Where do you want to live?
撇开Jody不谈 你想住哪儿
With Morgan. With all my heart.
一心一意想和Morgan一起住
He's my friend, and we wear the same Croc size.
他是我的好朋友 我们连洞洞鞋都穿一个码
Okay, I was trying to give you a way out,
好吧 本来想给你个台阶下的
but if that's really how you feel,
但既然这就是你的想法
and again, I find that very hard to believe,
尽管再说一次 我真的不敢相信
then you need to talk to your brother.
那你就该和你哥谈谈
You're right.
你说得对
Hey, I need to talk to you about something.
我得和你说个事儿
I have a kid, and I know that it's a deal-breaker,
我有个孩子 我知道这意味着咱俩要完
so I'm just gonna take my food
所以我打算拿着吃的
and eat in the ladies' room on the toilet.
去女厕所坐马桶上吃
Whoa. Hold--hold on, hold on. Wait, wait, wait.
慢着慢着 等下等下
Can we maybe sit down? We've got, like, 30 more plates of tapas coming.
咱能不能先坐下 还有30多盘点心没上呢
I Please?
我 求你啦
Okay. Okay. All right.
好吧 好 行吧
Guess what? I like kids. Really?
跟你说 我超喜欢小孩子的 骗谁呢
Look, we're both in our 30s, we have our histories.
你看咱们也都30多岁了 谁还没有过去
I mean, I was... engaged once.
我还订过一次婚
Didn't work out.
最后没成
My God, I was engaged too.
天哪 我也是
That's where my kid is from.
就是为了孩子订婚的
It's actually kind of a sexy story.
其实这事儿说起来挺撩人的
We were in the alley next to a Dumpster
当时我俩在阿甘虾餐厅后面
behind the Bubba Gump just kind of going at it.
垃圾站边上的小巷子里 性致突然来了就做了
Cool, yeah, do you maybe have any stories
厉害 你有没有其它故事
that don't involve you having unprotected sex with another man?
和不加保护措施的性行为没关的
Yes. Once, I got a turtleneck caught over my head in a changing room,
有啊 有次我在更衣室穿高领套头衫的时候头卡住了
and, uh, they had to call the fire department.
他们不得不叫消防车来救我
Made national news.
还上了全国新闻呢
Good morning, co-workers.
早啊 同事们
Look out. Here she comes.
小心 她来了
Everybody be nice. She just got dumped.
大家都和善一点 她刚被甩了
Uh, would a guy who's dumping me
要是这个男的打算甩了我
明迪烦事多（2012）
The Mindy Project
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