明迪烦事多（2012）

The Mindy Project S04E12

Part 1 April 29, 2021, 1:59 p.m.

When you're in a serious relationship,
当你在经历一段非常认真的感情时
there's all different kinds of sex.
会体验很多不同种的性♥爱♥
There's the romantic, lovemaking kind
有充满浪漫和爱意的
where two soul mates take care of each other's needs.
两个灵魂伴侣互相照顾彼此的需求
There's the passionate,
有一种是充满激♥情♥的
can't-keep-you-hands- off-each other kind...
根本停不下来
And then there's this new kind I'm finding out about,
还有一种是我新发现的
which feels a lot like procreation.
感觉只是为了繁殖
Oh, Nellie. Oh, Nellie.
哦宝贝儿哦宝贝儿
Whoo.
呼
Okay, so, I'm gonna go watch some Bill O'Reilly.
好了我要去看Bill O'Reilly的节目了
No, no, no, no.
别别别
Let's just look at each other in the eyes.
我们就这样静静地注视着彼此的双眼吧
Look each other in the eyes? Yeah.
注视着彼此的双眼对
'Kay, Jeffrey Dahmer. I don't think so.
呃 "Jeffrey Dahmer" 我拒绝
No, no, no, no.
不要啊
I'm really comfortable right now.
我现在感觉很舒服呢
'Kay. Okay.
好吧好的
Our Father Who art in heaven, hallowed be--
我们在天上的父愿人都尊
Hey, wait, wait, wait. Are you praying?
嘿等一下你是在祈祷吗
What?
啥
Are you, like, praying to God that I get pregnant right now?
你是在向上帝祈祷我立刻怀孕吗
Can't a guy pray inside of his own girlfriend?
难道人就不能在女朋友的身体里祈祷吗
Okay, come on. Just slide out, slide out.
好了快点赶紧出去吧出去
Why would I do that, and if I did, I mean,
我为什么要做这种事情不过就算我真这么做了
would that be the worst thing in the world?
也不至于成了世界上最糟糕的事吧
Kind of. Why?
差不多为什么
Well, my fertility practice is just now starting to succeed.
呃我生育诊所才刚刚开始有起色
Well, there's no perfect time, Min.
完美的时机是不存在的 Min
I mean, Leo didn't come at a perfect time,
我是说 Leo的到来也不是准备好的
and now he's our fantastic little diaper dude.
但现在他成了我们的"神奇尿布侠"
Exactly, so maybe Leo's enough.
对啊或许有Leo一个就足够了
Look, I'm not saying
听着我不是说
we should start trying necessarily,
我们必须马上开始尝试再要孩子
but if it happens, it happens.
但是如果你怀上了就顺其自然
That's the same as trying. It is?
这就是在尝试是吗
I'm extremely fertile, Danny.
我的生育能力好得很 Danny
It's not like India has an underpopulation problem.
印度可没有人口不足的问题
We used to have unprotected sex,
我们以前做♥爱♥都没有做保护措施
like, all the time before Leo.
直到你怀上了Leo
Yeah, I know, because I can never remember
是啊我知道因为我永远也记不住
to take my birth control, and you said that condoms
吃避孕药然后你说避孕套
made your penis feel... sweaty.
让你的丁丁感觉粘糊糊的
Yeah. That's not a real thing.
对根本没有这种问题
It's a real thing for me.
对我来说就有
Look, we're not trying and we're not not trying, okay?
听着我们没有在尝试我们也没有不去尝试好吗
We are not trying to have a baby.
我们没有试着再生孩子
Right. Right.
对好
Business as usual.
一切照旧
Nah, I don't know. Let's go again.
别我不知道我们再来一发啊
Oh, no, it's all right. You're not in the mood?
哦不来也没关系你没感觉了吗
You could, like, go down on me?
那你可以帮我口♥交♥吗
Ah, I'm too tired.
啊我好累
Dr. L, breakfast!
L医生早餐来啦
Ah! God.
啊天啊
I am so sorry. What the hell, Morgan?
我很抱歉搞什么鬼 Morgan
I'm gonna say one thing though, okay?
我有正当理由的好吗
The Dr. L that I used to know would catch that muffin
我以前认识的L医生闭着眼睛用嘴巴都能
in her teeth blindfolded.
接到那个蛋糕
Yeah, that's true. What's going on?
无法反驳最近怎么样了
'Kay, between the two of us,
好吧我只告诉你一个人
I think that Danny's trying to get me pregnant again.
我觉得Danny想让我再怀上一个孩子
No! No, no, no! The business, okay?
不是啦不是我是说正事好吗
I have finally saved up enough money
我终于存够钱
to move out of grandmother's basement,
从我奶奶的地下室搬出来了
not that I want to. I'm sorry, Morgan,
虽然我不想很抱歉 Morgan
but it's just not that simple.
事情没有那么简单
No, it is that simple, okay?
不对事情就这么简单好吧
You just say, "I don't want to have another baby."
你就对他说 "我不想再生一个小孩"
Off the record, no one likes Leo anyways.
私底下说反正也没人喜欢Leo
I don't like when you say things like that.
你这话让人很不爽
He can't even talk!
他连话都说不了
Yeah, he's a little baby. He's not gonna talk for a while.
是他还小啊他需要时间才能学会
When I seven, I was speaking full sentences.
我七岁的时候句子说得可流畅了
I cannot get into another big fight with Danny
我和Danny在婚礼之前不能再
before the wedding.
大吵一架了
I just wanna wait till we're married
我只是想等结婚之后
and then I will bring this up.
再提这件事的
You know, after I bring up the fact
你知道等我告诉他
that his mother needs to go into a home.
他妈妈自己也需要照顾之后
If you're not gonna tell him, you got to go on birth control.
如果你不打算告诉他你就要开始吃避孕药了
Morgan, that's so sneaky.
Morgan 这也太鬼鬼祟祟了
I can give him a vasectomy while he's asleep.
我可以趁他睡觉的时候给他结扎了
He literally would not know.
他完全不会发现的
How would that even work?
这怎么能够办到
Well by we, I mean me and cousin Lou.
我就可以啊再加上我表弟Lou
You would text me, say, "He's asleep,"
你到时就发短♥信♥给我说 "他睡着了"
we'd come in, snip-snip, bandage up.
我们就进来咔擦两下缠上绷带
He's in intense pain for, like, three weeks.
他会有强烈的疼痛不过三周就好了
He'll never know.
他永远不会发现的
Get out.
出去
Think about what I said.
好好考虑我刚刚说的话
Oh, God!
哦天哪
I thought you would have caught that one.
我以为你能接到这个的
I thought after the first one, you'd be expecting it.
我想错过了第一个你会料到这一个的
Everything looks perfect, Diana.
一切都很完美 Diana
Your baby girl is as healthy, and dare I say,
你的小女儿非常健康而且我敢说
as hot as can be.
也会长得非常正点
And don't worry, you know, the baby doesn't come out
还有别担心婴儿真正出生的时候不会是
in black and white,
黑白的
which is my favorite cookie, hint hint.
这可是我最爱的饼干的颜色你懂的
Well, thank you so much.
好的非常感谢你们
I'm just really excited to be a mom.
我非常激动要当妈妈了
Not as excited as us.
那也比不上我们激动
You are the first woman to give birth
你可是第一个选择在我们生育诊所的
with the help of my fertility clinic.
帮助下进行生产的
I'm not a fraud!
我可没有骗人
We'll never forget you, patient zero.
我们永远也不会忘记你零号♥病人
Okay, I've asked you not to call me that.
好的我告诉过你别那样叫我
Please don't forget to bring a camera
请一定要记得带一个相机来
so we can get a shot of the little guy
这样我们才能给小宝宝照相
and put him on our Wall O' Fame!
然后把照片贴在我们的"名婴墙"上
It's a play on "Wall of Fame."
这是学"名人墙"
Thanks so much, Dr. L, for everything.
非常感谢你 L医生谢谢你做的一切
Of course! We're really excited.
不客气我们非常开心
Yeah. Get out of here.
对慢走吧
Bye, Diana. Bye!
拜拜 Diana 拜
Bye.
拜拜
Morgan, why did you pick the biggest wall
Morgan 你怎么选了最大的一面墙
for the Wall of Fame?
来做"名人墙"
Wall O' Fame.
名婴墙
It's gonna take forever to fill this up with photos.
我们永远不可能把这里填满照片
We're gonna have plenty of babies up on that wall,
我们会在这里贴上很多婴儿照的
and in the mean time, why don't we put up
而且再说了我们也可以把自己
a little baby picture of yours truly.
小时候的照片贴上去嘛
Oh, God! That's the cutest one.
哦上帝啊这是最可爱的一张了
That can not go on the wall.
这不准贴上去
Okay, that's a little rude.
好吧你有点不礼貌呢
Oh, God.
哎哟天哪
Hey, babe. Can I ask you something?
嘿亲爱的我能问你点事吗