明迪烦事多（2012）

The Mindy Project S04E11

Part 1 April 29, 2021, 1:59 p.m.

Hey. Good morning, beautiful.
嘿早上好美人
Hi, baby.
你好亲爱的
I got you a present.
我有个礼物送给你
Oh, my God. Wow.
哦天哪哇
Danny Castellano, good morning. Morning.
Danny Castellano 早上好早上好
Oh, my God! Why did you give me a cockroach?
哦天哪你干嘛送我个蟑螂
No, it's not a cockroach, it's a date.
不这不是蟑螂这是海枣
Oh, fruit! You know I hate fruit! What's wrong with you?
噢水果你知道我最讨厌水果你到底在干嘛
Okay, stop!
好了停
Oh, God, it's my living nightmare.
天哪简直是噩梦成真
Hey. Okay, look look, that was just my way of saying
嘿好了你瞧那只是我想这样表示
I wanna set a date for our wedding.
我想趁"枣"为我们的婚礼定个日期
Oh.
哦
Yeah, I was doing my weekly dry fruit run...
是啊我当时正在吃我的每周水果干
And it just came to me.
突然想到的
I'm tired of living in sin.
我不想再带着罪恶生活了
Oh, please, we're like God's favorite porno.
哦拜托我们俩简直是上帝最爱的小黄♥片♥
Well.
好吧
Okay, well why now?
好吧为什么是现在
Well, when I was taking care of my dad,
我在照顾我爸的时候
the only thing that got me through was
唯一支撑我的就是
thinking about you and Leo.
想到你和Leo
Oh, sweetheart.
哦亲爱的
I love you. I'm so excited.
我爱你我好兴奋
Hey, to celebrate our matrimony,
嘿为了庆祝我们的婚事
how about a little mattress-mony?
稍微滚个床单如何
No, baby. What?
不行亲爱的啥
There's no time. There's not?
没有时间了没了吗
No, we have to find a wedding location.
没有了我们得找个结婚地点
And it can't be anywhere in Central Park,
而且中♥央♥公园里的任何地方都不行
because I fit the description of that flasher they never caught.
因为我符合他们没抓到的那个暴露狂的所有特征
Babe, I'd marry you in a gutter.
亲爱的哪怕是贫民窟里我也娶你
Aw. That is the sweetest and worst thing
哦那是我听过的
that anyone has ever said to me.
最美好也是最糟糕的话了
Now, go get your checkbook,
好了去把你的支票本拿来
'cause this bitch gon' be expensive.
因为这玩意儿会很花钱的
Hey guys, I'm so glad you could join us tonight.
嘿伙计们真高兴你们今晚能来
Um, Richie, congratulations, I have selected you
呃 Richie 恭喜你我选了你
to be one of my bridesmaids at our wedding.
做我们婚礼上的伴娘之一
Yeah, boy.
太棒了小伙子
That's a little offensive, don't you think?
这有点侮辱人啊你不觉得吗
If anything, I should be the Maid of Honor.
就算要当我也应该当首席伴娘啊
It's not like you have any female friends, Mindy.
你又没有什么女性朋友 Mindy
He's right. I don't know.
他说得对我不知道
Come on, Richie, you gotta be a bridesmaid,
拜托 Richie 你一定得当伴娘
'cause Rishi, we'd like you to be a groomsman.
因为 Rishi 我们想让你当伴郎
Oh, no, Mindy, I am not gonna be a groomsman
哦不 Mindy 我不要在白人佬的
at some honky's wedding, all right?
婚礼上当伴郎好吗
Hey! Look, I'm the DJ.
嘿你瞧我是当DJ的
Here comes the bride--ha!
新娘过来了哈
All dressed in cash, church is going crazy
穿的全是钞票教堂为她疯狂
'Cause it's all about that ass
大家都在看翘臀
You know what, I apologize. You need to be doing that.
好吧我道歉你确实应该干这个
You know how I do.
你懂我的
Well, Mindy, I took the liberty of...
那个 Mindy 我擅自
designing your invitations!
设计了你们的婚礼请柬
On my computer, of course.
当然是用我的电脑做的
The theme is: Very Religious.
主题是非常有宗教意义
Cool, okay.
真好好吧
"Annette Luiga Castellano invites you to the union
"Annette Luiga Castellano邀请您参加
of her son Daniel Matthew Mark Luke John Castellano"
她儿子Daniel Matthew Mark Luke John Castellano的婚礼"
Ma, you didn't use all my confirmation names.
妈你怎么没把我的教名全写上
Oh, they wouldn't fit.
哦太多写不下了
Hey, I love this, in theory, but I actually already finished
嘿理论上我喜欢这个不过其实我已经
designing the invitations to the wedding.
设计好我们婚礼的请柬了
They're silk.
是丝质的
Ma, what are you doing? Ma.
妈你在干嘛妈
Okay, you know what, Annette, we can use your invitation,
好吧其实 Annette 我们可以用你的请柬
but, for God's sakes, put my name on it, okay?
只是记得把我的名字也写上好吗
Really, Mindy?
真的吗 Mindy
Yeah. It's fine. I mean, everyone knows
是啊没关系我是说大家都知道
that the wedding is just about the dress, anyway.
反正婚礼只要看婚纱就行了
Exactly! Which is why I made an appointment for us
没错所以我也给我们预约了
at Gretchen's Bridal Pile and Beeper Store.
在Gretchen杂货店的试衣时间
Oh wow, Ma, you're so good at this.
哦哇妈你对这个真是在行
Maybe I should be marrying you.
或许我应该娶你才对
I always thought you two would make a great couple.
我一直觉得你俩挺般配的
Oh We'd be a great couple,
哦我们确实很般配
you and I. Meant to be.
我们两个天生一对
I mean, I'm marrying you, but...
我是说我实际上娶的是你但是
Eh... Yeah!
呃是啊
Goodnight, Ma! Goodnight!
晚安妈晚安
That was great.
真是太棒了
Hey, your mom is ruining this wedding for me,
嘿你妈要把我的婚礼给毁了
and it's not fair, Danny. I'm supposed to be the one
这不公平 Danny 应该是我来把
that ruins it for everybody else.
所有人的这一天毁了才对
Okay, just relax.
好啦别担心
Just be nice and try on a couple dresses.
就好心点试几套婚纱就好
If you don't find one you like, then go get the one you want.
如果你找不到喜欢的就去买♥♥你想要的那件
Oh, really Danny?
哦真的吗 Danny
I can choose my own dress for my wedding?
我可以自己挑婚纱吗
That's so nice, but your mom's gonna come
真是太好了但是你妈会
on the honeymoon with us, right?
跟着我们去度蜜月对吧
So she can tuck you in at night?
这样她就可以晚上哄你睡觉了
I don't know guys, it doesn't feel very me.
我不知道好像不是很适合我
First of all, I did not know that the Vatican
首先我不知道梵蒂冈
even made wedding dresses,
还产婚纱的
you know, and it was always my dream, growing up,
而且这一直是我的梦想长大成人
to wear a beautiful wedding dress that made
穿上一件漂亮的婚纱
all the groomsmen tent their pants.
让所有的伴郎下面都硬了
Have you ever considered that maybe
你有没有想过也许
the dress is not the problem? Huh?
不是婚纱的问题啥
Well, that's the eighth one you didn't like.
那已经是第八套了你还是不喜欢
I guess we should go. I'm sorry, Mindy.
我看我们还是走吧对不起 Mindy
I just really wanted to help you find a winner.
我只是非常想帮你找到一件最漂亮的
I mean, it wasn't unhelpful, Annette,
其实也不是没有帮助 Annette
I definitely know what I don't want at all in a million years.
我确定地知道我永远不想要的是哪种了
It's just that at Danny's first wedding,
只是Danny第一次结婚的时候
Christina and her mom boxed me out.
Christina和她妈当年把我给赶开了
They threw it at their fancy country club.
把婚礼办在她们那高级乡村俱乐部里
I'm sorry, Annette. That's not cool.
真遗憾 Annette 那太糟了
Thank you, Mindy.
谢谢 Mindy
So, that dress is definitely...
那么这件婚纱就完全
I don't know, maybe I was kind of hasty.
我也不知道也许是我有点草率了
I kinda like it. I'll get it.
我有点喜欢我就买♥♥它了
Yes! Ohh!
太棒了噢
Everyone, I present to you, my wedding dress.
大家注意隆重介绍我的婚纱
Oh, yeah!
哦真棒
Wow. Holy God.
哇天哪
Whoa. You know, I get paid
哇你知道在日本
like a thousand dollars for this in Japan.
我♥干♥这个能赚一千美元呢
Wow, that looks amazing... on Tamra.
哇 Tamra穿这个真是太美了
Okay, I'm going to be her weight
好吧等到婚礼的时候
and her height by my wedding.
我会和她一样瘦一样高的
You know, I actually entered
你知道吗其实我
your sexual history into an online wedding dress finder.
把你的性经历输进了一个在线婚纱挑选系统
It said you can just wear a lawn and leaf bag.
它说你就套个装落叶的布袋子就行
Or totally nude with a nun chanting "Shame, shame."
或者什么也不♥穿♥ 后面跟着个修女喊"羞耻羞耻"
Pardon the interruption, Mindy, but would you mind
抱歉打扰了 Mindy 你介不介意
working for a few minutes?
工作几分钟