尖叫皇后（2015）

Scream Queens S01E03

Part 2 Sept. 10, 2020, 10:49 a.m.

I mean, just like that?
好吧
Okay.
别问我是否想同去
Don't ask me if I want to go.
天哪
Hoes.
还我安宁夜
我不是卡帕成员
这些卡帕的标语是怎么回事
What's with all these Kappa signs?
已经成为一种风气了
It's a thing now.
有传言说杀手的目标是卡帕成员
People are saying that the killer's targeting Kappas
或与卡帕有关的人
or people associated with Kappa.
所以他们想如果杀手知道他们与卡帕无关
So, they figure if he knows they're not,
就不会被杀手开膛破肚了
he won't gut 'em like a fish.
我真是没想到兄弟
It's just blowing my mind, man.
真不敢相信我最好的朋友布恩死了
I can't believe my best friend Boone is dead.
听验尸官说布恩是自杀的
Yeah, I heard the coroner calling Boone's death a suicide.
血淋淋的悲剧
It's a bloody tragedy.
的确是血淋淋
Yeah, well, it was really bloody.
我想说兄弟
I don't know, man.
生活中总会有这种不可避免的事
It's just one of those things in life
让你饱受打击让你不禁会想
that just hits you so hard, and you just think to yourself,
至少得好几周才能真地忘记这个痛苦吧
wow, it's gonna be weeks before I really, truly get over this.
查德
Chad?!
查德我要和你谈谈
Chad, I need to talk to you!
布恩的死真是太令人难过了不是吗
It is so sad about Boone, isn't it?
你还好吗
Oh, are you okay?
你现在心情怎么样
I mean, how are you feeling?
我说不清楚
Uh, I don't know.
你觉得我现在心情如何香奈儿
How do you... how do you think I'm feeling, Chanel?
我世上最好的朋友
My best friend in the world,
过去一直对我称赞有加
who used to compliment me all the time,
他被谋杀了所以简而言之
was murdered, so, news flash,
我非常难过
I'm super sad.
我想成为那个
I want to be the one who tells you
今后称赞你的人
how awesome you are all the time.
我给过你机会香奈儿但是你没抓住
Well, uh, you had your chance, Chanel, and you ruined it
当我说要和你的尸体做♥爱♥时
when you started freaking out when I said
你吓得要命
I want to have sex with your corpse.
我知道我很抱歉
I know, okay, and I am so sorry.
我只是...我想和你在一起
I just... I want us to be together.
我只希望...
I mean, all I ask is that...
或许你能别和太多人发♥生♥关♥系♥
maybe you have sex with a smaller number of people.
什么
What?
你知道自己控制欲有多强吗香奈儿
Do you understand how controlling that is, Chanel?
我知道你不是心理学专业的
Okay, I know you're not a psych major,
所以你无法真正理解
so you're not gonna really process
我刚才那句话的意思
what I'm telling you right now,
但你刚才所说的话简直是病态的
but what you just said is literally pathological.
你为什么介意我睡过多少人
Okay, why do you even care how many people I sleep with?
我每次都戴套
Okay? I always wear protection,
这也不意味着我爱这些妞儿
and it's not like I love these chicks.
那你爱我吗
You... you love me?
我不是这个意思
That is not what I said!
你爱我
You love me.
不要那样说
Stop saying that.
听着香奈儿你是性感
Look, Chanel, you're hot... I guess.
你双峰挺翘对称
I mean, your boobs are symmetrical,
下面也修剪得很性感十足
and you shave your box in a hot way.
对了同时你还是这所大学
All right, but also you're responsible for
有史以来最糟糕的预备会员的负责人
the worst pledge class in the history of the university.
鉴于此我都不知道还能不能和你做♥爱♥了
At this point, I'm not even sure if I could have sex with you.
假如我正和你做♥爱♥
Look, I'd be doing you
我无意中往下看
and all of a sudden look down
就能看见你头的后脑勺
and I'd see the back of your head,
接着你的后脑勺就会令我联想到
and then I'd just, like, picture the back of the head
你某个丑陋的预备会员我就...
of one of your ugly pledges. And I'd...
很抱歉香奈儿我做不到
I'm sorry, Chanel. It's just not gonna happen.
我会再一次跟你分手的
I got to break up with you again.
-查德 -怎么了
- Chad! - Yeah.
求你了我肯定能做些什么来弥补吧
Please. There-there has to be something I can do.
听着那你就祈祷吧
Ew. Look, just pray.
祈祷那些驴脸预备会员们都被杀光
Pray that all those donkey-faced Kappa pledges get murdered
那样你又能受欢迎了
so you can be popular again.
现在恕我失陪
Now, if you'll excuse me,
我和厄尔·格雷要去悼念我们死去的兄弟
Earl Grey and I need to go mourn our fallen brother
然后去喝个酩酊大醉
and get our drink on.
老天你是在挑逗我吗
Omg, are you hitting on me?
美国电影演员制片人
据说迈克尔·道格拉斯就是因为口♥交♥患喉癌的
'Cause I heard munching box is what killed Michael Douglas.
没有我只是想跟你交朋友
No. I'm just trying to make friends.
那天你换衣服的时候
And I was spying on you the other day
我偷♥窥♥你来着
while you were changing.
我看到你后腰有一处纹身
Noticed you have a tattoo on the small of your back?
"8/69" 是什么意思
"8/69." What does it mean?
你人看起来挺酷的
Look, you seem pretty cool,
英国著名DJ 林赛·罗翰前女友
而且很有萨曼莎·罗森的范儿
and you have this whole Samantha Ronson thing
感觉确实挺酷的
going on that's pretty dope,
但别对我问长问短的行吧
but don't ask a lot of questions about me, okay?
好吧
Okay.
欢迎各位同学及教职员工
Welcome, students, faculty and staff
为理智和平静而参加这次集♥会♥
to this rally for sanity and calm,
我们誓要夺回安宁的校园之夜
as we vow to take back the night!
警方仍在调查本校新生
The police are still investigating
蒂芙妮·德·萨尔不幸去世的事件
the tragic passing of freshman Tiffany De Salle...
去世她可是被斩首而死的啊
Passing? She had her head mowed off.
至于近期身亡的大三学生布恩·克莱门斯
And the recent death of junior Boone Clemens
已被郡法医鉴定为自杀
has been ruled a suicide by the county coroner.
什么简直是胡说八道
What? That is insane.
谁会割自己的喉咙
Who slits their own throat?
我们要牢记事实的真♥相♥
Keeping these facts in mind,
我们必须彻底杜绝
we must put to bed wild rumors
存在所谓"红色恶魔"的连环杀手
of a serial killer, a so-called Red Devil,
正潜伏在校园里肆意屠♥杀♥学生的谣言
stalking this campus and murdering students willy-nilly.
我们的学校一如既往很安全
Our university is as safe as ever.
我们拥有一流的安保人员
Our security staff of the highest caliber.
因此我们要禁止某些行为
We must, therefore, resist the temptation
比如说
to, for example,
朝历史系新生尤金·梅尔曼的生殖器开枪
tase freshman history major Eugene Melman in the genitals.
经过长时间的慎重考虑
After many hours of deep soul-searching,
我与学校董事会一致认为
I have, along with the university's board of directors,
考虑到学校的长远发展
decided that the Red Devil mascot that
已承载我校荣誉近80年的
has demonstrated our school's pride for the past 80 years
红衣魔鬼吉祥物
is really no longer appropriate to represent us
已无法继续肩负这一殊荣
as we forge our way into the future.
因此我们决定
Instead, we've decided
选用全新的吉祥物
to highlight this region's proud history
来续写本校荣光
with a new mascot.
女士们先生们
Ladies and gentlemen,
我怀着激动的心情向你们介绍
I am thrilled and honored to introduce to you
本校的新成员...
this university's newest addition...
科尼
Coney!
众所周知 1955年
As you know, in 1955
本地乳品商兰迪·巴夫曼
local dairyman Randy Barfman
在他生产的冰淇淋里注入海藻精华
added kelp extract to his ice cream,
未经冷冻直接从凝冻机取出食用的甜品
从而制♥造♥出世界上第一款"软冰淇淋"creating the world's first soft-serve ice cream!
最后我想再简单说几句
I'd like to say a few words in closing.
让我们彼此敞开心扉畅抒感想
Let's tell each other how we feel about one another.
追逐你心底被压抑已久的基情
Find that tortured gay kid in your life.
今夜与其紧紧拥抱
Hold them close tonight.
最后
And, uh,
要不来一句 "加油蛋卷冰淇淋"
how about a big, "Go, cones!"
各位晚安
Good night.
你简直就是耻辱