尖叫皇后（2015）

Scream Queens S01E13

Part 3 Sept. 10, 2020, 10:52 a.m.

现在还有电椅吗
Do they still use those?
好
Okay.
谢谢你通知我
Well, thank you for letting me know.
哎呀呀
Well, well, well.
消息来了
This just in.
警♥察♥局长迪尼斯·亨普希儿刚接了个电♥话♥
Police Chief Denise Hemphill just got a call.
有人发现了一个腹肌分明
A decomposing male body was found
长得跟小基佬
with rippling abs and a possible gay face
布恩·克莱门斯
that appears to be a match
一模一样的腐烂尸体
for one Boone Clemens.
没错
That's right, y'all!
真是见鬼
Hot damn, shazam!
布恩死了
Boone is dead.
我说完了别人也没啥好说了
Excuse me for a second while I drop the mic.
我们知道布恩死了
We already knew Boone was dead.
皮特承认他杀了布恩
Pete admitted to killing him.
那还是让我
Okay, well, excuse me
重申一下
for trying to reiterate the facts
同步一下我们已知的消息
and get us all on the same page.
毕竟我只是区区
I mean, after all, I am just the chief
一介警♥察♥局长而已
of the whole damn police department.
好吧这些都太疯狂了
Okay, look, this is all so insane.
我们的确可以说五号♥是有些古怪
Look, we can all freely admit that Number Five is fairly odd,
但是凶手不是她
but she is not the killer.
海丝特才是凶手
The killer is Hester.
证据就在她的档案里
Yes, and the proof is in her files.
你们需要的唯一证据就是我脑袋上这个洞
The only proof you need is this hole in my head.
好消息是
Good news.
香奈儿五号♥用的力气不大
Chanel #5 didn't insert the heel hard enough
没有刺穿我的眼窝
to pierce my orbital socket.
医生们保住了我的眼球
The doctors were able to save my eyeball,
他们说我将会痊愈
and they said that I'm gonna make a full recovery.
不这不是真的
No, that can't be true.
你就是凶手
You're the killer!
你的整个人生就是一个谎言
Your entire life story is totally fabricated.
看看她那疯狂的假到不能再假的
Just look at her insane, obviously made-up,
高中成绩单
high school transcript.
我为此也很是尴尬
I'm very embarrassed about that.
是的我伪造了我的高中成绩单
Yes, it's true, I falsified my high school transcripts,
但是只是为了掩盖其实我是自学的
but only to cover up the fact that I was homeschooled.
我怕别人知道了
I-I was afraid that if people found out,
就不会叫我参加联谊会了
they wouldn't ask me to join a sorority.
骗子你就是浴缸里的孩子
Liar! You are the baby in the bathtub.
你和布恩太像了
You look just like Boone.
皮特说你的DNA和布恩以及我爸爸相符
And Pete told us that your DNA matched Boone and my dad.
你说的是那个
Are you talking about the same Pete
承认自己杀人的皮特吗
who admitted to being one of the killers?
他编造了这些
He's just making that all up
来掩护他真正的犯罪伙伴
to cover for his real partner in crime,
香奈儿五号♥
Chanel #5!
不是的
No.
那你怎么解释你父母
Well, then how do you explain the fact
完全没有任何
that there's absolutely no records
记录存在的事实
on your parents anywhere?
我想答案就在门口了
I think the answer to that is at the door.
什么
What?
亲爱的
Sweetheart.
海丝特
Hester?
亲爱的你没事吧
Oh, sweetheart, are you okay?
继父
Stepfather.
我们一听说就赶过来了
We came as soon as we heard.
妈妈
Oh, Mother.
抱抱熊
Cuddlebear.
各位这是我父母克拉克和迪莱特
Everyone, these are my parents, Clark and Delight.
海丝特是我们的亲生女儿
Hester is our biological daughter.
她绝对不是被收养的
She definitely was not adopted.
我有妊娠纹来证明
I have the stretch marks to prove it.
是的我们就是来证实
That's right, we're prepared to corroborate
我的继女海丝特所说的一切的
everything my stepdaughter, Hester, has just said.
我认识你吗
Do I know you?
等等我们没查到海丝特父母的任何记录啊
Wait, hold on, there's no record of Hester's parents anywhere.
这是因为直到最近
That's because, until recently,
我们夫妇俩都在为中♥央♥情报局工作
my husband and I worked for the CIA.
我们必须要保持身份的隐秘
We were forced to remain deep undercover
来保护海丝特和抱抱熊
to protect Hester and Cuddlebear
以及爱她们的人们
and the people who love them.
等等我认识你我知道你打哪来的
Wait, I do know! I know where I know you from.
我在前列腺广♥告♥里见过你
You're from that prostate commercial.
你再说一遍我超爱的那句台词呗
Can you say that line I love so much?
"谢谢强大力
"Thanks, MaxFlow,
我的清流从未这么有力"
my stream's never been stronger."
"从未这么有力" 对我超爱这句
"Never been stronger," Yes! I love that line!
为了掩饰他们的中情局超级特工身份
Well, in order to not blow their super-secret CIA covers,
我父母有时候会去拍拍广♥告♥
my parents sometimes work as actors in commercials.
是的是的
Oh, yeah, yeah.
我要跟我父母谈
Well, I want to talk to my parents,
他们就可以告诉你们
so they can explain to you
为什么我不是连环杀手了
how I am not a serial killer,
也不是什么浴缸里的婴儿
nor am I the baby in the bathtub.
不用急我已经把你父母叫来了
Don't worry, I already called your parents.
什么
Wha...?
妈妈爸爸
Mom and Dad!
请你们告诉大家我不是被收养的
Can you please tell everybody how I wasn't adopted,
也不是连环杀手
nor am I a serial killer?
我们并不是香奈儿五号♥的亲生父母
So, we're not Chanel #5's real parents.
一个叫琪琪的女人
A woman named Gigi
在精神病院缩减开支后把她交给了我们
gave her to us after a sizable stint in a mental institution.
什么
What?!
我们接受了她
We took her in
因为我们内心充满善意
out of the kindness of our hearts.
也是因为能减税
And also for the tax deduction.
这不是真的
That's not true!
琪琪只要求我们到时候
All Gigi asked was that when the time came
要让她读华♥莱♥士♥大学
that we enroll our daughter at Wallace University
并鼓励她加入KKT姐妹会
and encourage her to pledge Kappa Kappa Tau.
我们想要爱她如己出
We tried to love her like our own,
但我想说她不够好
but, I mean... she's not great.
现在她更是有可能成为凶手
And now that the truth is out that she's probably a murderer,
我们不想和她扯上任何关系
we don't want to have anything to do with her.
不
No!
你怎么能这么对我
How could you do this to me?!
两周前
老实说我们也考虑过
I have to be honest, we've actually discussed doing
你建议的这些事
exactly what you're proposing.
她刚开始学说话我就不想要她了
As soon as she learned to talk, I wanted to disown her.
她可能是校园杀手也可能不是
I mean, maybe she's the killer on campus, maybe she's not,
-但她应该就是了吧 -是啊
- but she probably is, right? - Yeah.
我想说她真的烂透了
I mean, she just sucks.
我们的女儿烂透了
Our daughter sucks.
你们怎么可以这样说
I can't believe what I'm hearing!
快告诉她们真♥相♥
Please tell them the truth.
这就是真♥相♥ 你个土鳖
It is the truth, you frumpy monster.
心理学家说
The psychologists said
你可能会记不起精神病院的事
you probably wouldn't remember the asylum
因为它带来的心理创伤过大
on account of it being so traumatic.
你的心中充满着臆想出来的
Your mind filled in the gaps with imagined memories
在我家成长的回忆
of growing up in our house.
可亲爱的你就一祸害
But, sweetie, you're toxic,
很招我俩烦所以你该走了
and you're bumming us out, so it's time for you to go.
好了好了我听够了
Okay, okay, I have heard enough.
现在我依然坚信扎丹·威廉姆斯是凶手