杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl S01E18
Part 1
Nov. 20, 2020, 12:20 p.m.
Nick! Your house guest is urinating in the bathroom
尼克 你的客人正在厕所里撒尿
Tony the Tiger style.
还一身托尼虎的装扮[美国经典卡♥通♥人物]
Naked with a kerchief? What?
全♥裸♥只戴了方巾吗 什么
Naked with a kerchief.
全身赤♥裸♥ 只戴一块方巾吗
No, what do you call top, no pants?
不 上身穿衣 下面光光该怎么形容
Oh ,that's like a Winnie the Pooh or a Paddington.
就像维尼小熊 或是帕丁顿熊
Honey the Smacks Frog.
美味脆上的那只青蛙
There's a Donald the Duck.
还有唐老鸭
I guess pretty much any kind of bear except for Yogi
几乎所有熊都这身打扮 除了瑜伽熊
'cause that's naked with a tie.
它是全♥裸♥只系了条领带
Alvin, Simon, Theodore.
阿尔文 西蒙 西奥多[均为卡♥通♥熊的名字]
I saw his entire butt.
他的屁♥股♥一览无遗
Look, Dirk's a good guy.
听着 迪克是个好人
He was my roommate when I was in law school.
他是我读法学院时的室友
Smartest guy I know.
我所知的头号♥智者
So, he's a lawyer?
这么说 他是个律师咯
No, he's not a lawyer, but he does have a law degree,
不 他不是 但他有法学学位
a business degree, and a master's in agriculture.
有商学学位 甚至还是农学硕士
He's kind of like a degree collector.
他就像个文凭收藏家似的
He's got his PhD in poetry, so...
他还是个诗歌♥博士呢
That sucks for poems.
诗歌♥界真是倒霉催的
How'd it go with Fancyman?
你和那高富帅进展如何
It was an amazing first date,
初次约会可理想了
except for one awkward part at the end.
虽然最后有点小尴尬
I don't go on dates very often.
我不常约会的
Guys my age always want to skip the date
我这年龄段的男人都一心只想跳过约会
and just go right for the gold,
直接伸手捞金
which I don't give them
我可不轻易让他们得逞
because I'm stingy with my gold.
我守着金子一毛不拔
Unless they dig for it.
除非他们亲自动手挖
I haven't even gotten to the awkward part yet.
我都还没说到尴尬的部分呢
Black sedan?
黑色轿车吗
Uh, yeah.
是
What?
搞什么
So, he patted me on the back.
他就这么拍了拍我的背
I thought I'd at least get a front pat.
我还觉得好歹袭个胸呢
What?
啥
Look, he probably just got nervous.
听着 他可能只是太紧张
No, Russell's never nervous.
不 拉塞尔从来不紧张
That's the worst answer.
这是最不可能的答案
Winston, what do you think?
温斯顿 你怎么看
Oh, thank God.
谢天谢地
Hey, what's up, baby?
什么事 宝贝
Hey, is that Shelby?
是不是谢尔比的电♥话♥
What was that? That was a cat sound.
你这是干啥 学猫叫
Oh, because you did the whip, we should've...
你模仿抽鞭子的声音 我们配合
Guys! It should have been the other way around.
伙计们 大概还有其他配合方法
Okay, I'm just gonna ask Cece.
好吧 我去问希希
But next time you guys want advice about girls,
下次你们要是想征求关于泡妞的建议
don't come crawling to me.
可别来求我
You got it. That sounds good.
没问题 听上去可行
No, that was a joke.
不 我开玩笑的
I love it when you guys ask me stuff.
我超享受你们问我事情
It makes me feel really important.
让我觉得自己很有分量
And I love it...
我可享受了
"One shade the more, One ray the less."
"光明消逝 暗影蔓延"
"Had half impaired the nameless grace."
"逐渐侵蚀这难言的美"
Are you wearing a ladies' scarf?
你系的是女式围巾吗
Come to my lecture tomorrow night.
明晚来听我的讲座吧
Absolutely not.
绝对不去
She's missing out, my man.
她不会去的 兄弟
Hey, Schmidt? Yeah?
施密特 什么事
Mind if I borrow your car to take Shelby to the airport?
我能借下你的车送谢尔比去机场吗
I don't have a car, Winston.
我可没有"车" 温斯顿
Hey, Schmidt, uh, you mind if I use the, uh,
施密特 我能借下你的
"Man-bulance"?
"兄护车"吗
The man-bulance is resting.
兄护车正处在保养期呢
He needs to get ready for the corporate team-building retreat on Monday.
为周一那场团队合作修行作准备
That's cool. I'm sure the man-bulance couldn't handle
没关系 反正你那兄护车也装不下
all of Shelby's luggage anyway.
谢尔比的行李
What the hell is wrong with you, Winston?
你脑子还正常吗 温斯顿
The man-bulance could fit the luggage of nine Shelbys.
就算谢尔比的行李翻个九倍也装得下
It has the towing capacity of a thousand Shelbys.
装下一千个谢尔比都没问题
You know what? Here you go, Winston.
你拿去用吧 温斯顿
There you go.
给你
Enjoy luxury.
享受这奢侈品吧
All good, man. I got your second set, so thank you.
不用 伙计 我有你的备份钥匙 谢了
How'd you get my second set of keys?
你怎么会有我的备份钥匙
Hey, someone left your door open.
是谁忘了关门
Someone left your face beautiful.
是谁造就你容颜倾城
Who is that?
这是谁
Apparently, his name is Dirk.
他叫迪克
Sorry, Dirk, I'm seeing somebody.
抱歉 迪克 我名花有主了
But should that stop you from seeing this?
但你仍有幸一睹这个
Yeah! That's awesome.
是啊 帅爆了
Does he keep you happy?
和他一起开心吗
He does what he's told.
他唯命是从
So you're the boss and he's your little secretary?
这么说 你是老板 他是你的小秘书咯
You're a sex-cretary?
你是"咪书"还差不多
I am definitely the boss.
我毫无疑问 绝对老板型
Sex-cretary, he just made that up.
"咪书" 这词是他刚即兴编的
I hate bachelorette parties.
我讨厌参加单身告别派对
I have, like 50 different penis items in my carry-on.
我行李里装了大概50种鸡鸡
This plane goes down,
要是坠机了
there's gonna be some sharks doing some really weird stuff.
海里的鲨鱼就要做一些奇怪的事了
Sharks? I thought you were going to Vegas?
鲨鱼 你不是去维加斯嘛
No, I'm going to Mexico. I thought I told you that.
不 我去墨西哥 我记得跟你讲过
Well, if you don't want me to go,
如果你不希望我去
I don't have to go.
我就不去
No, no, no, no, no, no, I want you to go.
不不不 不不 我希望你去
It'll be good, you know?
这样很好 懂吗
We spent the last five nights together.
我们在一起黏乎了五个晚上
I mean, you know, we both could use some space.
我是说 分开点好 距离产生美嘛
Right.
是啊
Did I say something wrong? What?
我是不是说错啥了 你说什么
I'm sorry. I couldn't hear you across all the space.
抱歉 你离得太远我听不见
Great news, um, Jess is taking a shower.
好消息 杰茜在洗澡
Okay, I just need, like, a good, solid ten minutes.
听着 我只需要 十分钟的私密好时光
Eat this granola bar first.
先把这麦片能量棒吃了
I want to try something called the horse trough.
我们玩点新花样 "卧♥槽♥立马"式
No, Cece.
不 希希
I'm not having sex with you right now.
我现在没法跟你滚床单
I have to get everybody in the company's name
我要把公♥司♥所有员工的名字
into a version of "We Didn't Start the Fire."
输进"不是我放的火"的名录里
Totally fine. What do you need, like, 20 minutes?
没事你忙 需要多久 二十分钟够吗
Cece, this... Okay, this is real work
希希 这可是正经工作
for my real boss who is not you.
是我正经的上司派给我的
Oh, I get what's happening here.
我知道你在闹什么脾气了
It's 'cause Ponytail called you a "sex receptionist."
就因为马尾男管你叫"情欲招待"
A sex receptionist answers calls all day.
"情欲招待"一整天就只管接电♥话♥
A sex-cretary does scheduling, light filing,
"咪书"至少能安排行程 整理文件
basically runs the office.
基本上是管整个办公室了
So, first of all,
所以首先呢
thank you for the demotion.
感谢你给我降职
And second of all, I quit.
其次 老子不干了
So, I'll see you tonight.
那行 晚上见
Did you not hear anything I just said?
你是把我说的当耳旁风吗
Oh, no, I totally heard you loud and clear, but
没啊 你说的每个字我都听得清清楚楚
do you know who didn't happen to hear you?
不过有俩小淘气碰巧没听到呢
What are you doing?
你这是在干嘛
杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl
剧集 | 杰茜驾到（2011） | 导航列表