杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl S01E22
Part 4
Nov. 20, 2020, 12:21 p.m.
- You want me to tell you? - Not really, actually.
你为什么放弃
Okay, why are you giving up?
有什么解决不了的问题 你怎么办
If something doesn't work out, what do you do?
改变一下自己 然后再试一试
You make an adjustment, you give it one more shot.
我就是这么对我的...
I mean, that's what I did with...
没事儿 说吧
Okay, just say it.
-我可人的谢尔比 -谢尔比
- ...my beautiful Shelby. - Shelby.
看吧 你干嘛说可人儿谢尔比
See, why did you say, "My beautiful Shelby"?
实在是太怪了
It's so weird.
听我说 我突然给她打了个电♥话♥
Look, man, I just called her out of the blue, okay?
然后 我重头来过
And then... I was a different person,
她也重头来过 看看我们
and she was a different person. Now look at us, man.
我们吃着三明治滚床单
We're eating sandwiches and making love to one another.
饭到爱
Sandwiches and sex?
梦寐以求啊
I want that.
那个 你昨天约会咋样啦
How, um... how was your date last night?
很简短 小男人跑医院去了
Brief. Small man go to hospital.
医院
The hospital?
-他没事儿吧 -不知道
- Is he okay? -I don't know.
我把他扔在那里打保龄球去了
I leave him there, I go make bowling.
娜迪亚 说实话 你到底干什么了
Nadia... like, honestly, what did you do to him?
他哭了个没完 太好玩了
Well, he cry and cry. It was so funny.
天呐
Oh, my God.
这不是我吗
There's me!
我很喜欢我们的关系 我以为你也是
I really like what we have. I thought you did, too.
没错 我是 只是 拉塞尔
I do. I did. It's just, Russell...
这下好 算了吧
Great. Just forget it.
你每次坐车都会这样
Yeah, that seems to happen every time you're in this car.
这上面按钮实在太多了
But there's so many buttons. It's like...
蝙蝠侠的座驾也没这么多钮吧
The Batmobile doesn't have so many buttons.
杰茜 我已经疯狂过了
Look, Jess, I've already done the crazy,
也激♥情♥燃烧过了
explosive passion thing.
当我和乌丽在一起的时候 感觉像是越来越靠近
When I was with Ouli, it was like edging closer and closer
木材切碎机的边缘那么刺♥激♥
to a wood chipper.
而我并不想再寻求这种感觉了
I'm not looking for that anymore.
我明白
I understand.
但我想要这种感觉
But I am.
而且
And...
我想要激♥情♥
I want passion...
即使会很艰难 会让我受伤
even if it's harder and hurts more.
那就这样了
So that's it.
再见
Good-bye, Russell.
天哪
Oh, my God.
你不是吧
Are you serious?
为嘛你在荧光灯下还能这么漂亮
How do you look this good under fluorescent lights?
我真的 真的抱歉
I am so, so sorry.
好吗 都怪我 我还以为...
Okay? This is all my fault. I thought...
到底发生啥了
What happened?
说起来有些丢人
Yeah, um... this is embarrassing.
我伤到老二了
I broke my penis.
-你啥 -我伤到老二了
- You what? - I broke my penis.
昨晚和娜迪亚在一起 完全失控了
Things got... I mean, just out of control with Nadia last night.
有那么一小会儿
And there was like this one moment
我疼得脑子里一片空白
where it was just blinding pain.
然后又有那么一会儿 我好像
And then there was another moment where I was like
看着自己 看着自己
watching myself watch myself...
我想我终于明白了《生命之树》的真正含义
I think I finally understand what The Tree of Life is about.
布拉德·皮特主演的美国电影 讲述一个孩子成年后 迷失了自己 他寻觅生命的原初以及意义的答案 拷问信仰的存在 最终明白了生命的真谛
虽然我不太确定
And I can't be certain of this,
但我相信
but I'm almost positive
娜迪亚的阴♥道♥是往右边拐了个弯的
that Nadia's vagina contains a right angle.
我走了 真不敢相信我居然会来看你
I'm leaving. I cannot believe I came here.
你在生什么气
How are you upset right now?
希希 是你结束我们之间的
Cece, you ended this.
你到底想让我怎么做
I don't know what you want from me!
我不想你跟娜迪亚睡
I don't want you sleeping with Nadia.
你疯了吗 我不想你跟任何女人睡一起
Are you crazy? I don't want you sleeping with anyone.
因为我喜欢你
Because I like you.
我做不到把心里的感觉统统说出来 好吗
I can't just always say what I feel, okay?
只是
It's just...
随便吧 施密特
Just, whatever, Schmidt.
你喜欢我
You like me.
你喜欢我这人
You like my personality?
我也很惊讶
I was surprised, too.
过来
Come here.
-怎么了 -天哪 为啥要这样对我
- What happened? - Oh, my God, why?
怎么了
Oh, what?
天哪 我的老二犯了心脏病
Oh, my God, my penis is having a heart attack.
-别碰我 别碰我 -好的 我...
- Don't touch me, don't touch me. - Okay. I...
-你走吧 -好的
- You gotta get out of here. - All right.
我是说 我想... 别弯腰
I mean, I'd-I'd like... don't bend over!
别哭 你傻了吗
For crying out loud! What are you, nuts?
抱歉 只是因为你的瑜伽裤
I'm sorry, it's the yoga pants.
抱歉 我...
I'm sorry for this, but I...
-我喜欢你 -我也是 好喜欢你
- I like you. - And I like you, too, so much.
叫护士来 叫个男护士
Call a nurse, call a male nurse.
最好是个大块头男护士 拜拜
Probably a heavy-set male nurse would be nice. Bye.
跟他形容成一个 撞坏了的高速公路圆锥
Describe it to them as like a... as a battered highway cone.
你好
Oh, hey.
你好
Hey...
卡洛琳 近来可好
Caroline, how you doing?
挺好
Good.
我去上个厕所
Just... going to use the bathroom.
-卡洛琳 -我懂
- Caroline? - Yeah, I know.
我打给了她 然后 我也不知道
I just called her, and then... I don't know, it's...
你这是在干嘛 你俩谈恋爱谈崩了
What are you doing? You guys had such a terrible relationship.
你疯了吗
Are you crazy?
你还熏了香
Are you burning incense?
是的 为了创造气氛 她喜欢
Yes, I am, for ambiance. She digs it.
她喜欢
She digs it?
你开什么玩笑 尼克 发生什么了
Are you kidding, Nick? What happened?
你发过誓远离女人 专注种西红柿
What happened to swearing off women
都忘到爪哇国去啦
and focusing on tomatoes?
我不会种西红柿
I can't grow tomatoes, Jess.
我觉得事情就该这么发展下去的
I think this is what was supposed to happen all along.
我和卡洛琳之间 我也接受这个事实了
Me and Caroline. And I'm okay with it.
我很幸福
I'm happy.
这也太可悲了 尼克 你之所以这么说
That is pathetic, Nick. You're just saying that
是因为你根本没有
'cause you don't have the patience
忍♥受寂寞的耐心和勇气
or the courage to be alone.
我永远都不会习惯用小便器
I will never get used to those urinals.
给我点时间好吗 我得单独和谈谈
Hey, would you give me a second? I have to talk to Jess for...
好的
Oh. Sure.
-好的 -没问题
- Great. - Okay.
-再见 卡洛琳 -再见
- Bye, Caroline. - Bye.
待会见 你这是啥毛病
See you in one second. What is your problem?
你就慢慢享受自己这些烂摊子吧
Have fun making terrible life decisions!
你就是无所不知 对吗
Oh, you just know everything, don't you?
-不 我才没... -我真的是受够你了
- No, I don't... - I'm actually so sick of you.
我对你真是太失望了
I'm just really disappointed in you.
也许我该更像你的方式
You know, maybe I'll be more like you, Jess,
去厨房♥做些甜点
and I'll go run into the kitchen and make pastries
-再撒上些巧克力屑 -我才没这样
- with sprinklies on them. - That isn't what I do.
在穿上几件傻了吧唧的睡衣外套
then throw some dumb pajama outfit on,
再口若悬河地教育别人该怎样生活
and then tell other people how to live their lives!
那才不叫什么睡衣外套
It's not a pajama outfit!
-那叫睡衣 -我就是这么说的
- They're called pajamas! - That's what I said!
尼克 你为啥不直接回你房♥间里
Nick, why don't you go back in your room
穿上你那二♥逼♥的法兰绒衣
and put on your stupid flannel
然后一直这么窝囊下去
and keep not living up to your potential!
-你真是个疯子 -我才不是
- You're a crazy person, Jess! - I am not,
杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl
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