闺蜜离婚指南（2014）

Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce S03E01

Part 2 April 5, 2021, 5:35 p.m.

天哪没有没有没有的事
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
我们可没有这么说不过好吧
Well, we didn't say it like that, but yeah.
没事的
It's fine.
我们没关系的孩子们都很喜欢JD
We're all fine. I mean, the kids adore JD.
不
No
我真的一点也不需要你们那些新婚蜜汁
I really just don't need any of your newlywed juice
喷得我浑身都是
just spewing all over me.
无意冒犯
No offense.
我想借这个浪漫的诗意的神圣的机会说
I'd like to say on this romantic, poetic, sacred occasion
爱情...
that love...
就是一场骗局
is a fraud.
-乔 -你听到自己在说什么吗
- Jo. - You hear yourself?
-又来 -你个傻♥逼♥混球酒鬼
- Not again. - You shitfaced, stupid son of a bitch.
是吗你每天都提醒我一次
Oh, yeah. You've been reminding me about it every day.
我会继续每天提醒你一次的
Oh, I will keep reminding you every single day
直到世界末日
until the end of time.
你一秒钟都别想忘记自己干了什么...
I don't want you to forget for one second what you did...
乔你这是在斩信使
Jo, you are shooting the messenger.
信.. 你才不是什么信使
- The me--you're not a messenger.
你就一可悲的酒鬼
You're a miserable lush.
你觉得我还不够难受吗
You don't think I feel bad enough?
只要你还睡在我的沙发上
As long as you're on my couch,
你就得按我的规矩来
you live by my rules,
如果我想强迫你每天看一遍这个视频
and if I want to force you to watch this video
像《发条橙》那样我就一定会这么做
every single day like goddamn "Clockwork Orange," I will.
这样的事不会再发生了
It is never going to happen again.
-天啊 -我以孩子性命发誓没有下次
- Oh, God. - I swear on our kid's life, never again.
他真是满口胡说八道
He's just so full of shit.
他都跟我保证了多少次他会戒酒了
How many times has he promised me he's gonna clean up?
我是怎么会趟这么一摊浑水
How did I get into this mess?
跟我一起去纽约吧摆脱这所有一切
Come to New York with me, just get away from it all.
我真的希望你重新考虑一下
I really wish you would reconsider.
我有个计划
I have a plan.
我先回东海岸六个月
I'm gonna go back east for six months,
等这里的情况稳定之后我再凯♥旋♥而归
let the dust settle here, and then my triumphant return.
-大家好 -你好
- Hello, everyone. - Hello.
我是奎娜
My name is Quinna.
现在让我们一起想想
Now, let's all think of something
今天有什么让我们心存感激的事情吧
that we're grateful for today.
我对今晚的夏至逢满月
I am grateful for the convergence
心存感激
of the summer solstice and the full moon tonight.
-是今晚吗 -是的
- That's tonight? - Yeah,
真正的受天之祜
a true celestial blessing.
我会马上回来为你们点单
I will be back in just a few to take your order.
好的
Okay.
谢谢
Thank you.
这里的菜不错但我有点想烧了她
The food here is good, but I kind of want to set her on fire.
不要这样她说得对
No, she is right.
夏至逢满月
The convergence of the solstice and full moon
是非常难得的
is incredibly rare.
是一个可以打开我们脐轮的强有力的机会
It's a powerful opportunity to access our sacral chakras.
不管那是什么我都不要
No to whatever that is.
我们应该来个女神仪式
We should have a goddess ceremony.
-有红酒吗 -当然没有
- Will there be wine? - No.
不是那样的仪式是灵魂的
No, it is not like that. It's spiritual.
好不好嘛让我为你们做些美好的事嘛
Come on, let me do something nice for you guys.
我的生活现在这么丰富
I mean, my life feels so bountiful right now.
我和JD好极了还有孩子和拉尔夫
Things with JD are great and with the kids and Ralf.
他们正在适应我们已经结婚了的状态
They're just adapting to us being married.
一切都好极了
Everything is great.
不好意思我迟到了
Sorry I'm late, you guys.
告诉我你们已经点单了
Please tell me that you ordered.
这和我想的是同一个东西吗
Is that what I think it is?
是啊杰克本来打算把孩子交到弃婴安全岛
Yeah, Jake was about to safe surrender him,
所以我制止了
so I intervened,
他现在终于安定下来了他太可爱了
and he finally settled down. He's so cute.
炒鸡可爱但你竟然和他一起照看这个孩子
Hella cute, but can I just tell you how screwed up it is
我能说这简直太扭曲了吗
that you are actually co-looking after this kid.
同意
Agreed.
你应该把泰雅和贝卡的照片钉在他的毯子上
You should dump it at the firehouse
然后一起扔去消防站
with Taye and Becca's headshots pinned to its blanket.
-狠 -大伙别这样嘛
- Wow. - Come on, you guys,
宝宝无家可归还有各种工作上的事
this whole free-floating baby thing and all the work stuff,
都让我非常非常焦躁
it has me very, very anxious.
所以我光是能做些什么就很开心了...
I'm just happy to be able to do something about something, so...
好了美女们想要点些什么
Okay, what can I get for you beauties?
我要"有感受的"
I am gonna go "Receptive".
你是
You are?
你要说得像声明一样
You have to say it like a statement,
也就是我是"有感受的"
so I am "Receptive".
我不要说
I'm not gonna do that.
我神经没有大条到可以说这个
I'm not a bowl of seed with nature grains.
我要一杯咖啡因为我是"累的"
I'm gonna have the coffee 'cause I am "Tired".
我是"有希望的"
I am "Hopeful".
我是有"说服力的"
I am "Persuasive".
不好意思
Sorry.
我是艾比
Abby here.
是的今天吗
Yes. Uh, today?
这很快啊
Well, that's very soon.
没关系
That's okay.
好的好的我一定会到的
Yes, yes, I will...I will absolutely be there.
好的再见
Okay. Bye.
好吧你没事乖乖的
Okay. You are okay. You are okay.
-怎么了 -两个小时
- What's going on? - Two hours.
我只有两个小时让自己振作起来
I have two hours to pull myself together
去挽回我唯一的收入来源
and go save the only paying job that I have left.
当初为什么我会答应照顾你
Why did I say that I would take care of you,
你个漂亮的小混♥蛋♥
you beautiful bastard?
谁能搭把手
Who can help me?
爱莫能助啊
I would love to help you with the baby,
我得为女神仪式做准备
but I have to prep for the goddess ceremony.
我得去面包店亲爱的
I have to get to the bakery, honey.
我来带
I'll take him.
迪莉娅你对小孩的厌恶程度
Delia, you loathe children
比对纽约还多
more than you loathe New York.
是啊但我要去纽约了
Yeah, and I'm going to New York.
痛苦是可转化的
Pain is transformational.
菲比不总是这么说吗
Isn't that what Phoebe always says?
别拿我说事
Don't put that on me.
好吧反正你也没得选
Anyway, it doesn't seem like you have a choice.
小宝宝想看迪莉娅阿姨喝酒吗
Hey, little baby, want to watch Auntie Delia drink?
逗你呢
Just kidding.
?Can we get it together?
好
All right.
你可以的女强人
You got this. You are woman.
所以说即便我跟那小白脸好过一段
And that is why my time
也完全不必担心
with the gigolo is nothing to be afraid of.
其实这应该是资本
In fact, it is an asset.
卡尔说我寂寞又绝望的样子
When Carl accused me of loneliness, of desperation,
正是男人在遇到
that's just what men do
独♥立♥成熟的女性之后的嘴脸
when they meet an independent woman of a certain age.
那就是他们的一面之词
That is the story they want to tell.
但我们不就是因为这些错误才成人的吗
But don't we become more human because of our mistakes?
我多真诚一点
My brand becomes more valuable
我的品牌就更有价值一些
as I become more authentic.
就没了
Is that it?
我可以接着讲啊
Uh, well, I could go on.
我最会说了
I mean, I'm a talker.
不问题在这
No, here's the thing.
你一边想着跟你前夫重归旧好
You were trying to get back with your husband
一边又写着离婚多么的骚浪嗨