说唱王戴夫

Dave S01E09

Part 1 July 4, 2020, 2:02 p.m.

戴夫我们没时间了
Dave, we don't have time.
♪慢一点来到我身边♪
♪ Slow down, come be with me... ♪
我把你需要的所有东西都收拾到这里了
Okay, I've got everything you need right here.
♪你是最好的♪
♪ You're the best... ♪
戴夫你还要唱多久
Dave, how much longer are you gonna be doing this?
♪很久我停不下来♪
♪ So long, I can't stop... ♪
-戴夫 -来和我一起唱
- Dave. - Do it with me.
我要走了
I'm leaving.
♪随你便♪
♪ Have it your way ♪
♪我知道我迟到了♪
♪ I know I'm late ♪
♪但没关系♪
♪ But it's okay... ♪
不
No.
♪我们不能再耽搁了♪
♪ We don't have time to wait... ♪
♪我们会玩得很开心的♪
♪ We're gonna have the best time... ♪
戴夫你得换衣服了
Dave, you have to change.
♪你还记不记得你生气♪
♪ Do you remember when you got all mad ♪
♪就因为我扔了那张传♥单♥♪
♪ 'Cause I threw out that flyer? ♪
那不是张传♥单♥ 我告诉过你了
That was not a flyer. I told you.
♪不它就是♪
♪ Yes, it was ♪
♪不那是张婚礼请柬♪
♪ No, it was a save the date ♪
♪都一样反正最后都会被♪
♪ It's the same thing, it's gonna end up ♪
♪贴在冰箱上♪
♪ On a fridge either way... ♪
好吧
Fine.
♪这周末♪
♪ This weekend ♪
♪你要和我一起跳舞♪
♪ You're gonna dance with me ♪
♪是的当然我爱你♪
♪ Yes, of course, I love you ♪
♪但我们现在真的得走了♪
♪ But we really got to go right now ♪
♪好吧虽然短暂还挺有趣的♪
♪ Fine, it was fun while it lasted ♪
我得把这个导出来
I got to export this.
这就是高雅艺术我的天啊
That was high art. Oh, my God.
-唱得太好了 -是啊
- Great work. - Yeah.
我们得走了
Okay. We got to go.
-我能把这个用做我专辑里的插曲吗 -戴夫
- Can I use this on my album as an interlude? - Dave.
♪你好我是戴夫♪
♪ Hi, I'm Dave ♪
♪我是利尔·迪基♪
♪ I'm Lil Dicky ♪
♪你好我是戴夫♪
♪ Hi, I'm Dave ♪
♪谁是戴夫♪
♪ Who's Dave? ♪
说唱王戴夫
第一季第八集
♪你好我是戴夫♪
♪ Hi, I'm Dave. ♪
如果我能用一个词来形容我姐姐
"If there was one word I would use to describe my big sister,
那就是"搞笑"
it would be 'hilarious.'"
当我想邀请安东尼·特纳来参加八年级舞会时
"When I wanted to invite Anthony Turner to my eighth grade dance,
朱莉说 "艾丽他会跳舞吗"
Julie was all, 'But, Ally, how will he dance?'"
-为什么 -因为安东尼·特纳其实...
- Why? - Because Anthony Turner had actually--
他在一次滑雪事故中把两条腿都摔断了
He broke both of his legs in, like, a really bad skiing accident.
但我觉得人们不会... 我应该在
But I-I guess people don't-- Should I say that
-笑话开头还是结尾说这句 -等一下
- at the beginning or at the end of the joke? - Wait a minute.
我以为你在做演讲现在...
I'm very-- Like, I thought you were giving the speech, and now,
你却说... 我只是...
like, you're talking t-- I'm like, just--
戏剧术语指面向观众方向的"透明"的墙
我不知道第四面墙是什么时候倒塌的
I don't know when the fourth wall broke,
不知道你什么时候开始和我说话一切都...
when you started talking to me, it's all very...
我在问你你觉得
I'm asking if you think it's, if that's...
大家会笑吗
Well, that's like-- people are gonna laugh.
我不知道我不会取笑一个孩子残废
You know, I don't know, I wouldn't make fun of a kid
或是你刚说的这些
for being crippled or whatever you just spoke about.
我都不知道我为什么当伴娘
I don't know how I'm expected to give, like,
我怎么能给出一个
an even okay maid of honor speech,
像样的伴娘发言呢
when I have no idea why I'm the maid of honor.
我们压根都不是朋友
Like, we-we're not even friends.
就用这句用这句开头这就是真情实感
Use that. Start with that-- that's raw.
这句话有情感很真诚
There's, like, emotion there. There's, like, earnestness.
有一种真实的热情
There's a real, you know, zeal.
不管我做什么我的家人都会评头论足
No matter what I do, my family's gonna judge it.
你知道我的父母都是天秤座
You know both of my parents are Libras? Both of them.
我不明白人们为什么说"别评判我"
Uh, I never understand why people say "Don't judge me."
人们就会受到评判
That-- I mean, we human beings judge.
这就是我们的禀性
That's, like, our total predisposition.
我们就是这样选择的
That's how we select.
或许不该用"选择" 但是...
Or-or not "Select," But...
麦克
Mike.
-老兄 -你好麦克
- Hey, man. - Hi, Mike.
你好艾丽
Yes, hi, Ally. Whatever.
戴夫听好了
Dave, heads up.
明日之星的吉姆·莫雷诺打电♥话♥来
Uh, Jim Moreno from Random Gem called, and, uh,
他说今天之前他们会准备好签约文件
he says they're gonna have a deal memo by the end of the day.
太好了这是什么意思
All right. Um, and that-- What does that mean?
你懂的真实意思
Like, you know, for real.
老兄这是预签合同
Dude, it is a precontract, right?
和你建立关系
It's establishing a relationship with you
把你当做他们的艺人
as an artist without, you know,
但不跟你签正式合同
getting fully into a contract.
我喜欢你说骚话的时候
I love it when you talk dirty.
这是迄今为止我们收到的最好条件了
It's the best thing that's come across our desk so far.
我的天啊
Oh, my gosh! Oh!
什么情况
What the f-- Uh...
喂
Hello?
无所谓了
Whatever.
我的天
Oh, my God.
我的天戴夫是只兔子
Oh, my God, Dave. It's a little bunny.
它倒下了
Man down.
我的天
Oh, my God.
该死它还活着
Fuck! He's still alive.
它的脚在抽搐
His little foot is twitching.
太悲哀了
Very sad.
戴夫
Dave.
-怎么了 -我们不能把它留在这里
- What? - We can't leave him.
它在痛苦挣扎
He's, u-uh, suffering.
我们得打给宠物医院之类的
We got to, like, call a vet or something, right?
你觉得附近有宠物医院吗
Do you think there's, like, a vet nearby, or...?
我不知道宠物医院在哪儿
I don't know where vets are. And, no.
宠物医院不会接收有寄生虫的这东西是野生的
Like, vets don't apply to vermin. This thing's wild.
这是只自♥由♥放养的野兔
This is a free-range rabbit. I mean...
-我的天 -我觉得你没有它的所有权
- Oh, my God. - I don't think you can call a vet
所以你不能打给宠物医院
when you don't have ownership of the cr-- you know, the creature.
它很痛苦戴夫
He's in pain, Dave.
它看起来... 确实很...
He looks like he's-- Yeah, it looks...
我觉得它要死了
I think he's fucking dying.
-我们要杀了它 -什么
- Okay, well, we have to kill it. - What?
它在痛苦挣扎
It-It's suffering. It's, like,
-慢慢死去 -你想让我...
- slowly dying. What are you-- - You want me to...?
我们要把它从痛苦之中解救出来
We got to put him out of his misery.
-就像是... -你想让我杀了它吗
- That's like... - You want me to kill it?
你想让我怎么做踩烂它的头吗
Like, uh, what do you want me to do? Stomp its head?
掐它的脖子... 我不会杀了它的
Smother-- Like, I'm not gonna kill this thing.
你要开车再碾压它一次
You-you got to get back in the car and then run him over.
再来一遍你想让我再压它一次吗我又不是苏吉·尼特
Again? You want me to run it over twice? I'm not Suge Knight.
-直接压过去 -这怎么就对它好了呢
- Run him over, but directly. - How is that better for him?
直接压过去我已经把它杀了
Direct? Uh, he's fucking-- I nailed him. I mean...
-你没有否则它已经死了 -我杀了
- No, you didn't! Or else he'd be dead! - I did.
换位思考一下
Put yourself in his shoes.
你想躺在马路中间流血而死吗
You want to be lying in the middle of the road, bleeding, dying?
这不是换位思考的问题它身上有寄生虫
This thing isn't wearing shoes, Al! This is vermin.
戴夫它还活着而且在痛苦死去
Dave! It's a living thing and it's suffering.
你得杀了它
You have to kill it.
你得往这边打方向
You have to cut more this-this way.
-往左吗 -你得往我右边一点
- Left? - You have to go on my right.
-戴夫你得往右边一点你这样不会... -好吧
- Dave, you have to go more right. You're not gonna... - All right,
我又不是技艺精湛的司机别喊了
I'm not a precision fucking driver. Stop yelling.
戴夫你得压上那只兔子
Dave, you just have to hit the fucking bunny.
不