说唱王戴夫

Dave S01E04

Part 1 April 5, 2020, 5:35 p.m.

你情愿变瞎而不是变聋吗
You'd rather be blind than deaf?
兄弟我还有什么要看的呢
Bro, what I got to see for?
该看的都看过了没什么好纠结的
I done seen it all. Easy call.
我问了这么多人你是唯一一个选瞎的
You're the only person I've asked this to who's chosen blind.
如果每个人的答案都一样的话
What type of hypothetical is this, bro,
这还叫什么假设
if everybody had the same damn answer?
有道理但是瞎了很糟糕啊
That's a good point, but, like, being blind would suck.
你什么都看不见了
You can't even see anything.
聋了的话至少你...
At least with deaf, you...
生活还是差不多的吧
It's a similar life, I guess.
亲爱的那是...
Honey, it's...
维兹·卡利法亲爱的
W-Wiz Khalifa! Yeah. Honey!
唱《我们就是这么酷》的那个
We dem boyz.
-维兹 -维兹·卡利法你好吗
- Wiz! - Wiz Khalifa, man, what's up?
是他就是他
There he is. That's him.
说唱歌♥手这张网还真是错综复杂
What a tangled web we weave.
说唱王戴夫
第一季第四集
周一
小姐
Mademoiselle?
-谢谢 -给你用来喝冰咖啡的金属吸管
- Thank you. - A metal straw for your ice coffee.
-你不必这么做的 -要这样的
- You didn't have to do that. - I did.
之前那根吸管掉地上了
You put the other straw on the ground.
两秒钟之后我就把它捡起来了
It was on the ground for, like, two seconds.
我可以擦擦干净继续用的
I could have wiped it off.
看看是谁来了
Oh, look what the cat drug in.
来人舔我吧
Somebody suck me!
好吧
Okay.
这个...
Well...
不是我做的是的
No, I mean, I did. It's all in the deck.
不我做的就是你吩咐的事都是我做的
No, I-I did exactly what you asked me... I did all that.
请让我重做吧是我的错
Please let me redo it. It's my mistake.
没错但我不懂这有什么必要让我...
Yeah, but I don't-- I don't understand why that's necessary for me to...
好吧我会刮干净我的脖子
Yeah, I'll shave my neck.
好吧行明天见
Okay, all right. See you tomorrow.
来人舔我吧
Somebody suck me.
你喊这话的时候死气沉沉
What a half-assed "Somebody suck me," Man.
你这么羞辱《变相怪杰》是会倒霉的
You're gonna have bad luck, dishonoring The Mask like that.
我就觉得这份工作没出路了
I just feel like this job is a dead end, man.
全公♥司♥就我账本做得最好你知道吗
It's like, I have the best book at the company, you know?
他们清楚我也清楚我就像他们的吃豆人一样
They know that, I know that. I'm just, like, their Pac-Man.
天天吃屎就像这样
I'm just eating shit, just like...
吃豆人不吃屎
Pac-Man doesn't eat shit.
他吃能用来升级的金币
He eats whatever the coinage is that he levels up with.
-你今晚应该和我们一起出去玩 -没错
- You should come out with us tonight, okay? - You should.
艾玛邀请我们去一个超酷的好莱坞派对
Emma got us into this, like, very cool Hollywood party.
大概是科技行业的人赞助的吧
And tech people are sponsoring it, I guess.
科技行业的人会在场吗
Oh, are-- tech people are gonna be there?
那就算了打死我也不去
Well, then, no. Yeah, there's no chance I would go to that.
-那太蠢了 -也会有名人到场
- That's so stupid. - There's gonna be celebrities there.
真正的名人比戴夫高级的那种
Like real, a-above Dave-level celebrities.
我还听说女人们会
I also, I heard, I heard that the women
用手扶着墙就像这样
are supposed to put their hands against the wall like this
然后回头看着男人们
and then just look back at all the men.
秀一下她们的逼吗
A little toe?
秀一下她们的屁♥眼♥和逼吗
A little backdoor toe?
没错
Yeah, exactly.
-你难道不想来这个派对吗 -她们会...
- Don't you want to come to the party? - And they're gonna...
-有些姑娘把头放在这里 -你难道不想
- Some girls are gonna put their head down here - Don't you wanna
-然后倒着跟你说话 -来参加这么一个派对吗
- and talk to you upside down. - To the party like this?
-真的吗 -是的
- Is that so? - Yeah.
来参加派对吧
Please come to the party.
好吧我来就是了
Okay, I'm coming.
我会去的
All right, I'll come.
真不敢相信你穿得跟个落魄赌鬼一样
Can't believe you're gonna try to talk to girls in the shirt
还打算去搭讪姑娘
that makes you look like you're bad at poker.
我喜欢这些工作服如果你多铲点煤进发动机里
I love these overalls. If you scoop more coal into the engine,
我们是不是会更快到达...
will we get there faster, or...?
-你真逗 -好吧
- You're so funny. - Okay.
我一向讨厌艺术但是
I normally hate art, but...
厉害了艾玛牛逼啊
Damn. Emma, this shit is crazy.
这些玩意你们姑娘家肯定喜欢
This the type of shit your bitch like right here.
这些都是你弄的吗
You did all of this?
这些老掉牙的破玩意儿吗才不是
This cliché bullshit? Hell no.
-我只设计了标语 -好吧
- I did the graphics for the signs. - Oh, okay.
追寻想象力
相同的艺术
挺不错的你挺有天分
It's pretty nice. You got talent, though.
我有微软文字处理软件
I got Microsoft Word.
灯光不错
Lights.
我喜欢这个
I like this.
多谢夸奖
Hey, thank you.
你觉得呢
What do you think?
我不想在艺术家面前谈论我的观点
Oh. I don't want to talk about my opinion in front of the artist.
太奇怪了
That's weird.
没事的完全没关系
Oh, no, I mean, that's totally fine.
艺术本来就是要创造对话
Art is meant to spawn a conversation.
好吧那我就恭敬不如从命了
All right. If you really want to talk about it, I guess,
有一个问题这怎么就算艺术了
one question I have is: how is this art?
好吧那你觉得这是什么呢
Okay, well, what do you think it is?
我觉得你把一束花
I think you took a bushel of flowers
插♥进♥了一个你买♥♥来的面包机里
and you just plopped it in a toaster that you bought somewhere.
-我是这么觉得的 -等等
- That's what I'm interpreting. - Okay, wait.
我明白了你不喜欢昆斯[黑人]I see what's going on here. You don't like Koons.
天哪我完全没有种族歧视的意思
Oh, my God. This is not racial in any way, my man.
不不不他说的是那个艺术家
No, no. He means, like, the artist.
杰夫·昆斯
Jeff Koons.
你是昆... 你名字叫昆斯[黑人]You are Koo-- Your name is Koons?
-不 -不我...
- No. - No, I'm...
不我是马库斯
No, I'm-I'm Marcus.
-给你 -谢谢
- Here you go. - Thank you.
我刚刚想到了一个超棒的点子
I just had an amazing idea.
说吧
Okay.
要是我们用小玉米做爆米花会怎样
What if we made popcorn out of baby corn?
天哪那会很可爱的
Oh, my God. That would be so cute.
-是吧 -没错
- Right? - Yeah.
我想了得有一下下吧
I've been thinking about it for m-- y-- a little bit.
我们应该试试看
We should do it.
哪儿来的"我们"
What's all this "We" Talk?
你是想在我的点子里掺一脚吗
You trying to get in on my idea?
-不我 -你就是想
- No, I... - You are.
-我是说你应该试试 -谢谢
- I mean, you should do it. - Thank you.
多谢你的支持不要剽窃我的想法哦
I appreciate your support. Don't steal my idea.
真的别
Don't.
因为我会起诉你的
'Cause I'll, I'll sue you.
-什么 -我开玩笑的我不会...
- What? - I-I'm kidding. I wouldn't...
我根本不知道那该怎么做
I don't even know how to do that.
但如果你敢剽窃我的主意的话
But I would, I would fucking take you to court, for sure,
我肯定会跟你对簿公堂的认真的
if you took my idea, like dead serious.
这样可不好
That's not cool to do that.
-好吧 -我在开玩笑但我会动手的
- Okay. - I'm joking around. But I did.
我做过我表弟就被我告死了
I did. I-- My cousin, I fucked him up bad in court.
他偷我IP地址我并不喜欢这样
I've had s-- IP stolen from me before and I don't like it.
-好吧 -我开玩笑的
- Okay. - I'm kidding.
-我再去给你拿杯免费的酒 -不用了
- Let me get you another free drink. - I'm good.
-就再喝一杯 -真不用了
- Just one more. Let me get you one more. - No, you know what, I'm good.
-祝你好运真的 -好吧
- Best of luck, really. - Well...
我只是在开玩笑
I was just kidding around.
兄弟那是不是... 你知道那是谁吗
Bro, is that...? Do you know who that is?
-谁特里皮·雷德吗 -是的兄弟
- Who, Trippie Redd? - Yeah, bro.
我超想为他做首歌♥ 兄弟
I want to produce for him so fucking bad, dawg.
那你怎么不直接走上前去告诉他
Well, why don't you just walk your ass up to him and tell him?
我现在嗨得一塌糊涂而且我不想做那种
I'm smacked as fuck right now, and I don't want to be
在美术馆里上前搭讪的奇葩男