加州靡情（2007）

Californication S01E01

Part 4 Dec. 1, 2020, 11:12 a.m.

Perhaps Getting A Blowjob
也许就是让一个精神上
From A Woman Who Is Essentially Married To God.
已经嫁给上帝的修女给你吹♥箫♥
Can't It Just Be That It's Naughty?
承认吧这多淫♥荡♥
What -- What The Fuck Is Going On With You, Man?
你到底怎么了?伙计
How -- How Are You?
你还好吗?
I'm Fine. I'm -- I'm, Uh --
我还好我
I'm Disgusted With My Life And Myself,
我受够了我的妻子和我自己
But I'm Not Unhappy About That.
但我并未为此而沮丧
Excellent.
好吧
Okay, As Your Friend And Agent,
作为你的朋友和经纪人
May I Simply Suggest That You Maybe
我简单地向你提个意见
Try To Start Looking For A Nice Girl?
也许你该试着开始找个好女孩了
What To Say To A Nice Girl At This Point.
一个好女孩说什么
You're About 10 Seconds Away
我能看出来再过10秒钟你就会跟一个好女孩坐下吃晚餐
From Sitting Down To Dinner With One.
你最好想出个好方法
That's Not Cool, Man.
这可不酷伙计
No, You're A Motherfucker.
不你这样很操蛋
So...Hank.
那么 Hank
Meredith.
什么事 Meredith?
You're A Writer?
你是个作家
Once Upon A Time, I Was, Yeah,
很久之前我是
In A Little Place They Like To Call New York City.
在我称之为纽约的地方当作家
I've Heard Of It.
我听说过那个地方
He's Still A Writer.
他仍然是个作家
A Great Writer.
一个伟大的作家
No. See, That's Where You're Wrong.
不不瞧你说错了
Writers Write. That's What They Do.
作家们是要写作的
Me -- Not So Much. Nothing. Nada.
我? 我可不怎么写东西
Have You Written Anything I Might Have Read?
那我可能读过你的作品吗?
Well, That Depends On Whether Or Not You Read, Meredith.
这取决于你到底读不读书 Meredith
I Read, Hank.
我读书 Hank
Excellent.
太好了
Most Recently, I Gave Man-Birth To A Weighty Tome
最近我将已婚男人叫做为
Called "God Hates Us All."
被上帝憎恨的男人
It's A Catchy Title, No?
现在已经成了标题了
Which Was Subsequently Turned Into A Movie Called...
这最后变成了一部电影叫做
Both: "A Crazy Little Thing Called Love."
"有种疯狂的东西叫做-爱"
The One With Tom And Katie? I Loved That.
是Tom和Cady演的那部吗? 我喜欢那部电影
Swell. That Was Such A Sweet Movie.
从未看过那样甜蜜的电影是啊
You Liked It?
你喜欢吗?
Wow. Congrats, Hank. You Must Be Really Proud.
祝贺你 Hank 你一定十分自豪
Like You Wouldn't Believe.
还以为你不会相信呢
Meredith, Tell Me About Yourself.
Meredith跟我说说你自己的情况
What Would You Like To Know?
你都想知道什么?
Well, Just The Cliff Notes Would Be Fine.
从简单的说起好了
Well, I Don't Know, Hank.
我看Hank
You Seem To Have Me All Figured Out.
已经都猜出来了
Why Don't You Give It A Try?
为什么你不来说说呢?
No.
好吧
Why Don't We Order A Little Something?
让我们来点东西吧亲爱的
Trust Me -- Getting Your Asshole Bleached
相信我点红酒也许? 就算给你的屁♥股♥漂白
Would Be Much More Fun.
也比这有意思
Is There A Waiter, Perhaps?
服务员在哪里?
I Don't Think You Want Me To Do That.
我看你并不想让我这样做
Sure, I Do. Tell Me A Little Bit About Myself.
不我想让你这么做告诉我一些关于我自己的事情
That's What Writers Do, Right? They Make Up Stuff.
我是说作家就是有这个能耐对吧? 他们编造故事
Come On. It Will Be Fun.
来吧会有趣的
Okay, I Think You Were Born In The Valley --
好吧我想你是在洛杉矶山谷
Something Like That.
出生的
Your Father Was Middle Management,
你的父亲是中层管理人员
White-Collar Executive.
到也说不上是什么总裁
Stay-At-Home Mom.
你妈妈是家庭主妇
You Didn't Want To Stray Too Far
你不想去远的地方上大学
To Go To College, So You Went To Usc.
所以去了南加州大学
Or Ucla?
还是加州大学洛杉矶校区?
No, No, Sc. Sc.
不不是南加利福尼亚大学
You Had A Serious Boyfriend In College.
你在大学有个认真交往的男朋友
You Got A Low-Maintenance Gig
你却做起了无聊的
In The Human-Resources Industry,
人力资源管理
Had A String Of Bad Relationships.
为了弥补心灵上的创伤
You Put On Some Weight.
你不停的增肥
You Looked Around, And You Saw
你开始看到
All Your Friends Starting To Get Married.
周围的朋友都成双成对
So You Decided You Should Lose The Weight.
于是你决定开始减肥
You Joined A Gym. Maybe Did A Little Running.
你开始盲目约会也许有过几次约会
Say You Want To Work.
可以看出来你想工作
Mmm, Maybe Start Your Own Party-Planning Business.
或许加入派队筹划这一行
But What You Really Want To Do Is Sit At Home
你真正想做的是坐在家里沙发上
On The Couch With Some Poor Sap, Watching Reality Tv
和一些可怜的傻子们一起看真人秀
While He Watches You Get Fat Again.
他会眼睁睁看着你又增肥了
Okay, Hank.
行了 Hank
Now, You're Giving Me That Look Right Now --
你现在看我的眼神就好像
A Look Like I Finger-Banged Your Cat.
我用手指强♥奸♥了你的猫
But What You Really Think Is,
但你实际上想的是
"If I Manage To Get Out Of Here,
如果你能在下15分钟内
"I Can Still Make It Home In Time
离开这里回家
Which I Have Tivo'd, I Swear To God.
我有Tivo 我对天发誓
You're A Real Prick. You Know That?
你真是个混♥蛋♥ 你知道吗?
Guilty. Guilty As Charged.
我有犯罪感很有犯罪感
I Thought She Liked Me.
我以为她喜欢我呢
I Thought It Was Going Well.
我以为进展顺利
Sweet. Get In A Fight --
太好了
She Did Ask For It. She Asked For It.
她自找的
Totally, And She Got It.
是啊她明白了
Go Home, Honey. Sleep It Off.
回家吧亲爱的好好睡
Tomorrow's Another Day.
明天又是崭新的一天
What's Wrong? What's Wrong?
怎么了怎么了?
I Just Thought You Were Gonna Hit Me.
我还以为你要打我
[ Laughs ] Why?
为什么?
Uh, No Reason.
没有原因
As You Were.
因为你...
Defile Me.
你想向我
Right On.
挑战?
Yeah, Hello?
喂?
Not The Best Time, No.
现在可不是好时候不
Oh, Shit.
哇靠
Okay, Okay. I'll Be Right There.
好吧好吧我马上到
Are You Kidding Me?
你在开我玩笑嘛?
Consider Yourself Defiled.
就当是热身
You're An Asshole!
你这个混球!
Where?
她在哪儿?
Somewhere Up In The Palisades.
在Palasace的附近
All Right.
行了
Who Did She Go With? Bill's Daughter.
她和谁一起去的 Bill的女儿
I Didn't Know Bill Had A Daughter. How Old Is She?
我都不知道Bill有女儿多大了?
And You Let Becca Hang Out With Her?
是啊她是个好孩子
She's The One That Called
就是她打电♥话♥给我
To Tell Me That Becca Was In Trouble.
说Beca有麻烦
What?
怎么了?
What?
怎么了?
You Smell Like Pussy.
你身上有股女人屁♥股♥味
Thank You.
谢谢
No. No.
不不
Becca, Becca!
Beca? Beca?
I Hate You.
我恨你
All Right. I Guess I Deserve That.
我想我是自找的
No One Deserves That.
没人自找的
You Want To Come In?
你想进来吗?
What About The, Uh, Lord Of The Manor?
礼貌之尊呢?
He's Out Of Town.
他出城了