大嘴巴（2017）

Big Mouth S02E02

Part 1 Oct. 9, 2020, 11 a.m.

All right, my lady dudes. Time for soccer.
姐♥妹♥们♥ 该踢球了
I love working with you, Miss Whistle.
我好喜欢跟你合作哨子小姐
I blow into your mouth, and you scream out your keister.
朝你嘴吹气小屁♥股♥就开始叫了
Banter. Go Jesse!
开玩笑啦杰西加油
Love you, Jelly Bean. Guys! We're just warming up!
爱你宝贝我们在热身呢
So your parents are here together.
你父母和好了
That's probably a good sign, right?
这是好迹象吧
Oh, please. It's bullshit.
拜托扯呢
My dad's living in the basement, my mom's dating a woman.
我爸住地下室我妈跟女人好上了
Oh, okay.
好吧
I am playing it cool, but some of that is new information.
我很淡定但这信息量好大
This isn't even real soccer. What? 'Cause they're girls?
这哪算足球啊怎么因为是女子的吗
Yeah, sports are played by men, starving dogs,
对啊运动是男人饿狗
and juiced up horses.
和发♥情♥的马玩的
I can't believe Jesse dumped you. Oh no. That's fake news.
杰西居然把你甩了才不是
What? She didn't dump me. I dumped her.
什么她没有甩我是我甩了她
Nick?
尼克
Where did those come from?
这是从哪来的
Below the neck... above the waist. Boobs!
脖子以下腰部以上胸部
It's definitely them. They're looking right at me.
肯定是它们正看着我呢
Boys are so gross.
男孩太恶心了
That uniform is doing something different.
那制♥服♥好不一样啊
You're just doing exactly what they're doing.
你跟他们一样呢
You're objectifying her.
你在客观化她
But she looks really good, right? Yeah.
但她好美呀对吧是的
Those boobs! They're too awesome.
胸部也太棒了吧
Watch out! I'm coming in hard.
当心我硬着陆啦
Real hard! I'm going down!
非常硬我坠机啦
I can't feel my legs.
我感觉不到腿了
I have to go to the bathroom right now.
我要去下洗手间
Kill me. Somebody kill me.
杀了我杀了我吧
I don't want to live my life in a chair.
我不想在轮椅上过活
It's not all bad. You can do Disney world in an hour and a half.
也不全是坏事你能一个半小时玩完迪士尼呢
Breaking news:
突发新闻
Boob fever, which is not breast cancer,
胸热不是乳腺癌
is sweeping Bridgeton Middle School.
正在扫荡布里奇顿中学
Patient zero is Gena Alvarez.
初始病人是吉娜·阿尔瓦雷斯
Gena has tested positive for big tits.
吉娜的大奶检测呈阳性
I took to the hallways to get some uninformed opinions.
我去走廊做了一些暗中采访
I wonder what the new girl's nipples look like.
新女孩的乳♥头♥长什么样呢
Um, she's not new.
她不是新来的
She's been going to school with us since first grade.
她一年级就和我们一起上学了
They're probably the same color as her mouth, right?
可能和她的嘴颜色一样对吧
Nips match lips. That's what my brothers always say.
我兄弟常说它俩一样
This might be controversial, but I'm gonna come out as pro boobs.
虽然可能有争议但我支持大胸
They're a beautiful paradox,
它们是一个美丽的悖论
both weightless and heavy at the same time.
可重于泰山亦可轻于鸿毛
I heard she has to wear two sports bras.
我听说她必须穿两件运动胸罩
I would literally kill a man, a decent hard-working family man
我愿意杀人一个体面勤劳的家庭男人
for the chance to touch those big mushy breasts.
来摸那个大胸
When does this air? Why is everybody so obsessed with boobs?
什么时候播为什么每个人都如此痴迷
I love them. I love them so much,
我爱它们非常爱
'cause whistles, they're on strings,
因为哨子有绳子
so when you accidentally swallow 'em,
万一不小心吞了
you can yank 'em right back out.
你可以直接拽出来
My boobs don't even bounce when I run.
我跑步时胸部都不动的
And your taters are growing in uneven.
你的左右还不一样大
One's a Yukon Gold,
一个马铃薯
one's a little fing-a-ling.
一个小馒头
Oh my God! You guys! DeVon broke up with me.
天啊德文和我分手了
Oh, holy heck. Another broken heart. That really stinks.
天啊又一个人失恋了太惨了
I'll bet he dumped me for Gina and her slutty boobs.
他肯定是因为吉娜和她的骚奶才甩了我
Big boobs aren't even that great.
大胸也没那么好啊
Right, Lola? Yeah.
对吧洛拉是的
You know, my mom wrote me a check to get a breast reduction,
我妈给我一张支票去做缩胸手术
but, I spent it on a Pretty Little Liars meet and greet.
但我去参加《美少女的谎言》的见面会了
That sounds like a good investment.
这钱花得不错
Look, you should all calm down.
你们都冷静下来
We already live in a society
现在这个社会
that fixates on the female form, and a psychologically--
就关注女性身材心理上
Listen, decimating way to many young women.
给很多年轻女人让路
Boo, feminism. I am not with her.
女权主义我不同意
Okay, well, anyway Magga.
好吧不管怎样啰嗦
I read somewhere that no one likes their boobs.
我读过一篇文章说没人喜欢她们的胸
I don't mind my boobs. What boobs?
我不介意我的胸什么胸
You're flatter than the earth, flat-so.
你的比地球还平
What? Lola!
什么洛拉
Actually, the earth is not flat. Tell my pastor that.
其实地球不平告诉我的牧师吧
Missy, I wish I didn't have to wear a bra.
米西我也不想戴胸罩
What is that? An undershirt?
这是什么汗衫
It's Kirkland Signature. They also make water.
这是柯克兰签名衫他们也会制♥造♥水
That's sweet.
太棒了
You're actually very lucky to be totally completely flat.
你真的很幸运完全是平的
Boys will never bother you,
男孩永远也不会打扰你
'cause you know, there's nothing there, right?
因为那里什么也没有对吧
Yeah. I guess I am lucky.
是啊我想我很幸运
I'm pretty actually lucky too, because, like,
我也很幸运
remember the Pretty Little Liars meet and greet?
还记得《美少女谎言》的见面会吗
Gina? She got such a bangin' body, bro.
吉娜她身材太好了吧
You love her. You want to marry those boobs.
你爱她你想娶那对奶♥子♥
I would 100% marry her boobs.
肯定啊
It would be a tasteful ceremony. Catered, open bar,
来个雅致的仪式提供饮食免费酒吧
but wine and beer only. I'm not made of money.
但只有葡萄酒和啤酒我不是有钱人
I now pronounce you man and boobs.
我宣布你和胸部
You may motorboat the bride.
你可以架新娘了
Mazel tov!
恭喜
I love you so much.
我非常爱你
Hey, look at me! I'm Gina. Jay!
看我我是吉娜杰伊
Huge jags.
大胸
I'm tucking my penis between my legs.
我把鸡鸡夹在腿间了
I'm definitely not doing this again when I get home.
回家肯定不这样了
You're pinching it so tight.
你夹得太紧了
Just kidding. I'm Jay now, guys.
开玩笑的我是杰伊了伙计们
And my dick, whoo, feels amazing.
我的鸡♥巴♥ 感觉棒极了
All right boys, let's-- Oh no!
孩子们我们不
There's a naked lady in here.
这里有个裸体女人
Did I walk into the triangle body locker room again?
我又走进三角更衣室了吗
Coach Steve, that's Jay. Jay's a naked lady?
史蒂夫教练这是杰伊杰伊是裸体女人
What? No.
什么不
Have you never seen a naked woman before?
你没见过裸体女人吗
It's on my todo list. What?
我以后会的什么
Sorry, let's just fill in some blanks real quick.
抱歉我捋捋
You're 47... Yeah.
你47了是的
...but you never seen a naked woman. No way!
但是你没见过裸体女人不可能
Let's put aside for just a moment that you are our sex ed teacher.
更别说你是我们性启蒙老师了
I'm your guy. Coach Steve...
就是我史蒂夫教练
have you ever had sex? What?
你有过性行为吗什么
Of course not. I'm not a mommy or a daddy.
当然没有我又没当爸妈
Yeah, come on. What do I look like?
怎么了我咋了
You do know you can have sex without having a baby.
你可以做♥爱♥不生孩子啊
Are you messing with me, Matthew?
马修你在耍我吗
Oh, bless your heart, you un-sharpened pencil.
上帝保佑你没削过的铅笔
Speaking of sharpened pencils,
说到削铅笔
Oh, boy. I might have to break off the tip.
天啊我得把笔尖折断了
I'm flat as a cheese board.
我像奶酪板一样平
Missy, if you're a cheese board,
米西如果你是奶酪板
then I'd happily be the Manchego
那我愿意成为上面的
and dried apricots that rest upon you.
奶酪和杏干
Oh, thanks, Nathan Fillion.
谢谢内森·菲利安
That's very sweet of you to say.
嘴真甜