大嘴巴（2017）

Big Mouth S02E09

Part 3 Oct. 9, 2020, 11:02 a.m.

Yeah, we'll just put them in a wood chipper, guys suck.
我们把他们扔进碎木机就好男生都很渣
But what about girls, though?
但女生呢
Devin looked me dead in the eye and called me a slut.
德温盯着我叫我婊♥子♥
She let you look her in the eyes? Oh, my God! Lucky Lola.
她让你盯着她天啊洛拉真幸运
Oh, Lola. Devin is so mean to you. No!
洛拉德温对你太刻薄了不
Why are you even friends with her? 'Cause like, she said,
你干嘛还跟她做朋友因为她说
like, she's like a beautiful speedboat
她像艘漂亮的快艇
and I'm like a lumpy barnacle that's stuck on her hull.
我像粘在她甲板上的藤壶
Oh, Lola. You don't have to be Devin's Barnacle.
洛拉你不用当德温的藤壶
Oh, my God. Are you proposing that I become like, your barnacle?
天啊你是让我当你的藤壶吗
Not exactly 'Cause I'll like ruin your paint job,
不是虽然我会弄坏你的油漆
but like, ultimately... Oh, we're hugging.
但最后我们抱在一起了
...become very good company to you.
我会成为你非常好的伴侣的
Well, Jay, I suppose if I had to let any magician butt fudge me,
杰伊如果我要和魔术师肛♥交♥
I guess it would be Teller,
那我选特勒
because he's small and he seems gentle.
因为他很小而且好像很温柔
Wrong answer!
回答错误
It's Chris Angel because his name sounds like anal.
要选克里斯·安琪尔因为这名字听起来就像肛♥交♥
Now, here's how it's done. Smooch.
让你们看看怎么玩亲亲
Come on.
来
Yes, yes, yes. No, no, no, no!
对对对不不不
And there it is. Shit.
我在这呢操
You gotta kiss him.
你要亲他
But it's the rules. Singe his skin with the teacher coffee.
规则就这样用教师咖啡烫他
I know how to play Smooch or Share, okay?
我知道规则好吗
But Matthew isn't even playing!
但没参与啊
No, I'll play, but there's no way
不我参加但杰伊不想亲男孩子
Jay wants to seem gay by kissing a boy.
因为他不想被当成基佬
No, if I didn't want to kiss you
不我不亲你
it'd be because you'd hurt my feelings.
也是因为你伤害了我的感情
That's even gayer. Fuck!
这更基了操
Fine, I'll do it.
好吧亲就亲
And when I win this game,
等我赢了
you guys are going to smooch and share my asshole.
大家都得亲吻和分享我的屁♥眼♥
This kid is a goddamn prodigy.
这孩子是奇才啊
I think he's his own Hormone Monster.
他本身就是个荷尔蒙怪兽吧
Well, then. In your face, Matthew.
来吧操♥你♥妈♥
Jay, Jay. Jay! Am I right? Here we go. Jay, Jay...
杰伊杰伊杰伊对吧来吧
I really should be getting back to those children,
我该回去找那些孩子了
but I can't leave until I'm finished with you.
但跟你没完我不能走
Why? Well, once I begin a task
为什么因为我一旦开始一个任务
I feel I must complete it before I can move on.
就必须完成才能继续下一个
Why? It's just this need inside of me.
为什么我就这样
I crave order, you see.
我喜欢规则
I suppose that's why mommy called me Mr. Bookshelf.
所以我妈叫我书架先生
Why? I don't know why!
为什么不知道
She was the one who told me to organize the books
她让我整理书
and I organized them.
我就整理了
And then she made me feel strange about how I organized.
然后她又因为我的方式感到不安
Who? Mommy!
谁妈妈
Oh, you mean Mrs. Bookshelf. No, I mean...
你是说书架女士不
Well, yeah, I suppose so. Though truth be told,
对不过说真的
she never married my father.
她没嫁给我爸
What was he like? Father...
他人怎么样父亲
He was a tune whistled by a Cape Town whore.
他常去开普敦招♥妓♥
Oh, yeah. Cape Town, over by the airport.
开普敦机场旁边那个
No, South Africa! Oh, South Africa...
不南非那个南非
over by the airport.
机场旁边那个
All right!
好吧
Danke. Kissing with you is like for me to kiss my uncle.
谢谢和你接吻就像和我叔叔一样
These girls are hot, but they smell like herring and dark bread.
这些姑娘很漂亮但闻上去像鲱鱼和黑面包
Okay, I guess it's my turn and I pick share.
到我了我选分享
What? You got to kiss somebody else
什么你得再亲一个
to get the dark bread taste out of your mouth.
才能去掉嘴里的黑面包味
No, let's keep sharing, it feels good.
不继续分享吧感觉不错
A good call in the share.
选分享很明智啊
Ask him what's the naughtiest ickiest thing he's ever done.
问他干过什么最色情的事
All right, buddy. What's the grossest thing you've ever done?
兄弟你干过什么最恶心的事
That's like asking a Beatle his favorite Beatles song.
这就像问甲壳虫成员最喜欢乐队的哪首歌♥
Uh, there's so many.
好多呢
Okay, this one's good. Okay.
好吧这个不错嗯
You'll like this. Waiting.
你会喜欢的说吧
It's gross, but it's good. Great, that's the question.
虽然恶心但很劲爆很切题
At your pool house... Sure.
在你泳池房♥里嗯
Your parents are making lunch, I go to the bathroom,
你父母在做午饭我去了卫生间
I see Leah's bathing suit there, right,
看到利亚的泳衣
so I get hard and I start masturbating to it. - What?
然后硬了就开始撸管什么
And then Leah.... Leah walks in on me.
然后利亚撞见了我
Bah, bah, bah! You know.
你懂吧
So you jerked off to my sister?
你对我姐撸过管
Well, to her bathing suit,
对她的泳衣
but yes, I guess it was... she had been in it.
嗯是的毕竟她穿过
So I was imagining her.
所以我在幻想她
We don't want to think of Leah that way, Andrew's bad.
我们可不想这么去想利亚安德鲁太坏了
The hell, Andrew? She's hot. What are we supposed to do?
搞什么安德鲁她很性感没办法啊
But you can take it as a compliment.
但你可以把这当成夸奖
What's the compliment? You do have the same bone structure.
什么夸奖你们骨骼是一样的
So it's like you're jerking off to me?
所以等于你对我撸了管
This dirty turtle jerked off in your house!
这个脏乌龟在你家撸过管
I bet he does it all the time! What the fuck are you doing?
他肯定老这样你在干什么
Have you masturbated in my house before?
你在我家撸过管吗
No, never! When you're in the room...
你在房♥间时没有过
unless you're sleeping.
除非你在睡觉
You jerk off next to him while he's asleep?
你趁他睡觉在他旁边撸过管
He really is like Uncle Bram.
他真的很像布朗姆叔叔
I wasn't thinking about you, okay? Jerk.
我想的不是你好吗混♥蛋♥
I was looking at your cat clock. My cat clock?
我在盯着你的猫钟猫钟
My grandmother gave me that clock. I know.
那是我祖母送我的我知道
Oh, that also turned you on?
这也能让你性奋
Looking at this in realistic way,
实际点看
all my thinking was pretty abstract.
我的幻想都很抽象
You're like a compulsive masturbator.
你就是撸管狂魔啊
I hate Andrew, I hate his spermy dick.
我讨厌安德鲁讨厌他的精♥液♥鸡鸡
He's jealous 'cause he can't jack it. Oh, yeah?
他是因为撸不了才嫉妒你的是吗
Well, Nick, you're just jealous 'cause you couldn't jerk off
尼克你这是嫉妒因为就算我花钱让你撸
if I paid you to.
你也撸不出来
He wants to pay the boy to masturbate.
他想花钱让这孩子撸管
Uncle Bram.
布朗姆叔叔
You're a gigantic jizz creep.
你就是个撸管狂魔
Well, you're a dickless little dwarf.
你就是没屌♥小侏儒
Guys, stop it.
住口
I hate you! That's convenient, 'cause I hate you too!
我讨厌你正好我也讨厌你
I'm outta here.
我走了
What kind of hormone monster are you, man?
你这荷尔蒙怪物怎么回事
Making your kid feel bad for jacking off?
让你的孩子因为撸管而羞耻
That's against the Jizzocratic Oath.
这违背了撸博拉底誓言
Which you signed in blood and semen.
你可是用血和精♥液♥签的
I remember, it looked like a cream cheese and jelly sandwich,
我记得就像奶油干酪和果冻三明治
and I ate the whole thing. Yum, yum, yummy.
我都吃了很好吃
Great, thanks a lot, now I'm starving.
谢了我现在好饿
Where is it? I know it's here.
哪呢我知道在这
There! See?
那里看见了吗
That's who I used to be. A person interested in social justice,
这才是原来的我对社会正义感兴趣
the kind of female warrior who empowered other women.
给其他女人力量的女战士
Wait, where are you going?
等等你要去哪
To be that person again.
找回自己
That's too vague. Hold up. You know what?
什么意思啊等等
What I'm gonna do is just follow you.
我还是跟着你吧
Oh, shit. My golf balls!
操我的高尔夫球
Dammit!
靠