美式主妇

American Housewife S03E10

Part 2 Dec. 9, 2019, 7:57 p.m.

for the lead of "Little Shop of Horrors."
没有你我做不到
I couldn't have done it without you.
-准备去彩排吗 -我去拿剧本
- Ready to rehearse? - Let me just grab my script.
皮尔斯你想和我玩小马吗
Hey, Pierce, do you wanna play ponies with me?
-小马 -对
- Ponies? - Yeah.
我编了个游戏叫
I made up a game called
康州马娇妻
"Real Horsewives of Connecticut."
这是多纳泰拉·晨星
This is Donatella Morningstar.
她为新的马鞍系列举办发布会
She's having a launch party for her new saddle line,
但她没有邀请火花·奥唐纳修
but she didn't invite Sparkles O'Donahue,
所以她和贝瑟尼·托洛茨基吃午餐谈八卦
so she's having lunch with Bethany Trotsky to talk trash.
我不玩小马
Yeah, I don't do ponies.
告诉父母我们离开加入马戏团了
Tell Mom and Dad we're off to join the circus.
你突然想到的吗
Did you just come up with that off the top of your head?
你居然没参加即兴表演
Mm. ‭I can't believe you haven't done improv.
那小子的脑门欠踢
That boy needs a hard hoof to the head.
多纳泰拉你真坏
Ooo, Donatella, you are bad.
那女人对什么都不满意
Nothing was ever good enough for that woman.
你就这样放着吗
You have those just loose in there?
没有袋子吗
No bag?
这是口袋为什么还要袋子
It's a pocket. Why would I need a bag?
我知道她让你发疯
Listen, I get that she makes you nuts.
她也让我发疯
She makes me nuts.
但你能和凯瑟琳和平相处吗
But could you just make peace with Kathryn?
那就像
You see, that would be like
在连接处用水泥基灌浆
using a cement-based grout on a joint
而不是填缝
instead of caulk.
我是说不管用
I'm saying it wouldn't work.
我只是请你稍微表示一下
I'm just asking for a small gesture.
稍微示好穿上长裤
A peace offering. Put on a pair of pants.
我的腿温度高
My legs run hot!
凯蒂只想要一个
Listen, all Katie wants
没有压力的圣诞节
is a stress-free Christmas.
这是为了你的女儿和外孙
Do it for your daughter and your grandkids.
好吧我为了他们
All right. I'll do it for them.
苹果派
Apple pie?
为什么是热的
How is it warm?
我说了我温度高
I told you -- I run hot. ‭
他甚至不想和我玩康州马娇妻
He wouldn't even play "Real Horsewives" With me.
他傻啊那么好玩
That's crazy. It's so fun.
你跟他说了多纳泰拉·晨星吗
Did you offer him Donatella Morningstar?
她是整个秀的大明星
She's the breakout star of the whole show.
我根本没机会
I didn't even have a chance.
他走开了
He just walked away.
我对他的感觉不好
I get a bad feeling from that guy.
我也是
Me too.
你得振作起来
You need to get your act together
追回泰勒
and win Taylor back.
怎么做
How?
她非常生气不想和我说话
She's super mad. She won't talk to me.
这可是圣诞
It's Christmas.
在她的储物柜放上秘密圣诞老人礼物
Put a Secret Santa gift in her locker.
-好 -她不知道是你送的
- Okay. - ‭She won't know it's from you,
她喜欢礼物你跳出来
and when she loves it, you pop out
笑的非常帅气
and do your smiley handsome thing.
我笑起来的确很帅
I'm really good at smiley handsome.
也许是最帅的
Maybe the best there ever was.
我送什么给她
But what do I get her?
我恰好知道她想要
I happen to know she wants
蒂芙妮手镯
a Tiffany Infinity Bracelet.
好没问题
All right. I'm in.
我有一个问题
I just have one question. ‭
多纳泰拉·晨星发布了新的马鞍系列吗
Did Donatella Morningstar launch her new saddle line yet?
是的好多狗血
She did. And there was so much drama!
真不敢相信
I can't believe
我错过了
I missed it. ‭
看柜子修好了
Check it out -- the cabinet is fixed.
我和你♥爸♥谈了后
And after my little talk with your dad,
圣诞节也搞定了
so is Christmas.
我不敢确定
I wouldn't be so sure.
你听到他们吵架吗
Do you hear them fighting?
但他们可能削尖了拐杖糖
No, but they could have sharpened candy canes
互捅对方
and shivved each other.
妈
Mom?
看到我的鼠王面具吗
Have you seen my Mouse King mask?
我之前看到在办公室
I saw it in my office earlier.
我什么都搞定了
I'm fixing everything.
天啊
Oh, dear.
我的面具
My mask!
孩子对不起
Oh, yeah, uh, listen, kiddo, I'm sorry.
太激动压坏了
It kind of got all squished in the excitement.
给亲爱的
Oh. Here, honey.
但我可以修好
Yeah, uh, but I can fix it.
出什么事了
What is going on in there?
我的天你们两个做了什么
Oh, my God. What have you two done?
别回答
Don't answer that.
求你了别回答
Please! Don't answer that.
好我不回答
Fine, I won't answer.
反正发生的发生了两次
But whatever did happen here happened twice.
我让你分开他们
I told you to keep them apart.
他们反而在一起了格雷格
They are the opposite of apart, Greg!
我希望你拥有平静的圣诞
I wanted you to have a peaceful Christmas.
我只要求你♥爸♥穿上裤子
All I did was ask your dad to put some pants on! ‭
我穿了
And I did.
然后又脱下了
But then they came right back off again.
我感谢他的示好
I appreciated the gesture. ‭
我们开始回忆
You know, we just started reminiscing
美好的时光
about the good times,
一件事接着一件事
and one thing led to another.
又接着一件
And another.
顺理成章
And most of the way to another.
拜托别说了
Ugh. Please stop.
你母亲决定也许我们应该再试试
Your mother decided that maybe we should give it another go.
不
‭No.
这是一个非常可怕的主意
That is a terrible, terrible idea.
-对吗格雷格 -可怕
- Right, Greg? - ‭Terrible.
我们不会有事的
We'll be fine.
我们甚至在考虑同居
In fact, we're even thinking about moving in together.
不是一起搬进我的办公室吧
Wait, not moving in together in my office.
另外的地方
An off-site location?
我家
My place.
爱情万岁
Hooray for love!
我不知道我爸在想什么
I don't know what my dad was thinking
居然和我妈复合
getting back together with my mom.
他忘了她对他有多坏
He doesn't remember how awful she was to him.
我没忘
But I do.
所以我对格雷格很和气
That's why I'm so easygoing with Greg.
你对他的确比对其他人和气
Y-You are nicer to him than you are other people, I guess.
凯蒂他们都是成年人
Katie, they're both adults,
而且你摆脱了你妈有什么大不了的
and you get rid of your mom. What's the big deal?
因为一旦有更好的人出现
Because the minute someone better comes along,
她就会离开
she is going to take off
再次伤透我爸的心
and break my dad's heart all over again.
-太无情了 -你也是这样对你老婆的
- That's cold. - You did the same thing to your wife!
没错因为异性恋能做的
That's right, because a lesbian can do
同性恋一样可以做多瑞丝
anything a heterosexual can do, Doris.
我不能看着我爸又经历一次
I can't watch my dad go through it again.
我花了一年时间才让他振作
It took me a year to get him back on his feet.
所以我这么母爱泛滥
It's probably why I'm so nurturing.
你对自己的看法
Wow. You really see yourself differently
真的和其他人不同