凶宅处理专员（2021）

SurrealEstate S01E04

Part 2 Aug. 16, 2021, 10:44 a.m.

爱抱怨的完美主义者可真不少格雷格
That is a buttload of whiny perfectionists, Greg.
你到底帮不帮忙
So, can you help us out or not?
为什么找我们为什么现在
Why us? Why now?
是我老板
My boss.
他的太太迷恋水晶通灵会和瑜伽这类破事
His wife's into crystals and seances and yoga and shit.
她觉得这里的事情恐怕不止是
Thinks there's something more happening besides
建筑质量问题
bad construction.
老板问我的看法我就告诉他我认识个人
Boss asked me about it, told him I knew a guy.
把这些文档都发我
Send me those files.
投诉设计图
Complaints, the development plats,
平面图建模等等所有一切
the site plans, the model schematics -- everything.
我们会发挥专长有进展告诉你
We'll do what we do and we'll get back to you.
听着卢克
Look, Luke,
只要你能帮我摆平我
if you can help us out here now, we can
不会亏待你
make it worth your while.
就像你在巴尔莫勒尔农场那样吗
Like you did at Balmoral Farms?
有什么发现
You picking up anything?
这地方简直是北美最不闹鬼的区域了
This feels like the least haunted place in North America.
我们在一个毫无灵魂的地方寻找孤魂野鬼
We are looking for wandering souls in a soulless environment.
难以想象会有效果
Hardly seems productive.
所以我才喜欢多诺万的房♥子
That's why I like the Donovan place.
鬼屋就要有个鬼屋的样子对吧
It's a creepshow that dares to look like a creepshow, right?
怎么了
What?
有点不对劲
Something odd.
基兰蒂芙妮
Kieran! Tiffany!
来吃午饭
Lunch is ready.
好说到哪了第27项是
Okay, where were we? Items 27 forward are
连续重击声
incessant pounding noise;
灯开关质感奇怪
light switches have weird texture;
地板积水
water pooling on floors.
更准确说是"渗水"
More like "Seeps".
水就凭空出现不是我们洒上去的
Just appears--it's not like we're spilling it.
她明白邓肯
She knows, Duncan.
抱歉你告诉我要事无巨细
Well, I'm sorry, you asked me to be more thorough.
对但你解释积水的语气充满男人式颐指气使
Right, but you're mansplaining what pooling is.
你知道吗每次你说这个词
You know, it really hurts me
都让我觉得很不爽
when you just throw that term around.
有时候只是说明而已
Sometimes it's just explaining!
带着老二解释
With a penis.
两位我们回到正题好吗
Guys, let's just get through this, okay?
北极鸽白而不是云白色
Arctic Dove, not Cloud White
还有墙体颤动
and wobbly walls.
抱歉我...
Sorry, I...
可否请你详解一下颤动是什么意思
Ca-can you unpack that for me? Wobbly?
每次我走过某一面镜子它都好像在动
Every time I walk by this mirror, it's, like, moving.
楼上也这样
And it happens upstairs, too.
我的镜子要完美无缺我是个网红所以
I need mirrors to be impeccable. I'm an influencer, so--
索菲
Sophie,
那些镜子是你的
they're your mirrors.
它们在别处都很好
They work fine everywhere else.
所以问题肯定和墙有关
So the problem must be with the walls.
我会四周看看做些评估
Let me look around; take a few measurements.
找找色板然后我们再沟通
Check a few colour chips. And then let's talk.
好了现在有什么线索
So, we have what?
17所房♥子都出现自发破损
17 houses with spontaneous breakages
和系统故障菲尔那边呢
and system failures. Phil?
土质没问题
Dirt is clean.
没发现什么环境渊源
No sign of environmental engagement
也没有历史文化遗存问题
or histocultural plangency.
奥吉呢
Augie?
我们在四邻走了一圈
As we wandered through the neighborhood
我们进行的
there was a sudden spike
地表光敏分♥析♥探测到数据激增
in our Photoreactive Terraform Analysis.
在多处场所
Multiple locations.
它一出现就迅速消失了
It vanished as quickly as it appeared.
我们漏掉了什么
Well, we are missing something.
他们有多少种不同的样♥板♥房♥♥
How many different models do they have?
六种
Six.
全都以著名的堡垒命名
All named after famous forts.
哈利法克斯特拉华
The Halifax. The Delaware.
独♥立♥ 萨姆特
The Independence. The Sumter.
麦克亨利
The McHenry. The--
怎么了
What?
我以为你说的是著名的屁
I thought you said famous farts.
你能放一下天线地图吗
Can you put up the aerial plat?
所有出事的地方都用X标记了
All the places that stuff happened are marked with an X.
你能重叠一下不同样♥板♥房♥♥的位置吗
Can you overlay the location of different models?
萨默塞特地♥产♥
哈利法克斯
独♥立♥
特拉华
找到了
Bingo.
全是特拉华
They're all Delawares.
我会这么做
So, here's what I'm going to do:
有些问题我可以找承包商
some of these I can get a contractor out
马上解决
to fix right away.
今晚吗
As in tonight?
现在都...8点30了
It's... 8:30.
可能是明天吧
Tomorrow, probably.
其余问题我想跟我的团队谈谈
The rest, um, I'd like to bring to my team.
可能是房♥子本身有些古怪
It-it may be the property itself has some eccentricities.
我们会找专家来解决好吗
We'll get some experts to sort them all out, okay?
我们非常感谢
We'd really appreciate that.
因为我们仍在五天登记投诉期内
Because we're still within the five days to register complaints
所以如果没解决我们不想这么做
so if they're not fixed - we don't want to do this--
我们讨厌这样做
We'd hate to do this--
我会像小飞象的妈妈一样大哭
I would weep like Dumbo's mother.
但然后我们会擦干眼泪我会让银行
But, then we'd dry our tears and I'd have the bank
停止转账就像合同中写的那样
stop the transfer of your fees as specified in your contract.
好吧谢谢苏珊一路平安好吗
Okay. Thanks, Susie Q! Drive safe, okay?
梅根你真的在躲我吗
梅根你不觉得很讽刺吗
梅根你没看出是讽刺吗
卢克也许我疯了但
卢克我们需要谈谈
小梅你可真会选男人
Meg, you really know how to pick 'em.
然后"砰"的一声掉到沟里了
And bam! Into the ditch!
我不得不叫了辆拖车
I had to call a tow truck.
是一个骑着马的人吗
And it was a guy on a horse?
我们可以把它作为马术房♥出♥售♥
We could have sold it as an equestrian property.
提高价格
Upped the price.
这地方空了好多年了
Ah, this place was empty for years.
在杂草丛生的地方有座破败的小屋
Run-down cottage on an overgrown lot
景色十分迷人
with a killer view
在屋主最终决定翻新前没钱了
before the owner decided to finally renovate - cash out.
我们需要菲尔和奥古斯特去那里搞清
We need Phil and August up there to find out what--
那到底
really is...
是什么
what?
请让我们单独谈谈
Excuse us?
我记得你告诉过我菲尔和奥古斯特
Remember when you told me it was better for Phil and August
最好别去见客户
not to meet clients?
邓肯和索菲正是
Duncan and Sophie are literally the clients
你之前所说的客户
you were talking about.
好吧
Okay.
告诉他们去个不错地方住几天
Tell them to take a few days somewhere nice --
水疗中心酒店费用都算我们的
spa, hotel, whatever on us.
然后在他们离开期间我们做我们的事
And then we'll do our thing while they're gone.
顺便说一句我的车还在修车店
By the way, my car's in the shop.
佐伊今天是你的幸运日
Zooey! It is your lucky day.
你得开车送苏珊去海边
You get to drive Susan out to the coast.
把她留在那里等死对吗
And leave her for dead, right?
所以我们没有人事部门
This is why we don't have H.R.
公路旅行
Road trip!
公路旅行
Road trip.
事情是这样