瑞克和莫蒂（2013）
Rick and Morty S01E09
Part 2
Oct. 7, 2020, 2:27 p.m.
This serum should counteract the negative effects.
这种血清可以中和副作用
Holy cats!
天哪
Ladies, let's get out of here.
姑娘们 我们走吧
I haven't learned a thing!
我什么教训都没接受
Here. You can have this back.
你可以拿回去了
You didn't use it?
你没有用吗
Sure I did, to develop this.
我当然用了 用来开♥发♥了这个
It detects and catalogs all your "twilight zone," Ray Bradbury,
它能探测并分类你这些"阴阳魔界" "Ray Bradbury"
"friday the 13th:the series" voodoo crap magic.
"十三号♥星期五" 巫毒破烂玩意儿
I thought you might want it.
我觉得你说不定会想要
so you didn't accidentally sell anybody, say...
免得你不小心卖♥♥给谁 比如
A typewriter that generates best-selling murder mysteries
能创作出最畅销谋杀案
and then makes the murders happen in real life? Ooh.
并让它们真实发生的打字机
Be quiet.
安静点
Don't you want to make sure people know what they're getting?
你不想确保顾客都知道他们买♥♥了什么吗
You're not intentionally selling...
你不会是故意的吧 卖♥♥这种
Beauty cream that makes ugly ladies pretty but also makes them blind?
能让丑女人变美但会让她们失明的美容霜
I find this all quite preposterous.
真是荒谬之极
Oh, I say, good Sir. Oh, harrumph. Oh, oh.
哦 我说 好先生 哦 哼哼 哦 哦
That's beautiful.
真漂亮
You know it's gonna be wearing you in three hours?
你知道三小时后就变成它穿着你了吗
Do I need to call the police?
你是想让我报♥警♥吗
Here, you can use my phone.
拿去 你可以用我的电♥话♥
Don't worry.
别担心
It won't make you deaf because I'm not a hack.
它不会让你失聪的 我又不是黑心商
Hey, no!
嘿 别这样
You think you're [Bleep] so great, you stupid piece of [Bleep] shit. Stop it!
你以为自己多[哔]棒 你[哔]蠢蛋 住手
Stop! Hey! Hey! [Bleep] you, man.
住手 嘿 嘿 你丫[哔]
Stop it right now!
立刻住手
Grandpa Rick, I like working here.
Rick爷爷 我喜欢在这工作
You work for the devil.
你是在为魔鬼工作
So what?
那又怎么样
So what?
你说怎么样
Yes, so what if he's the devil, Rick?
是 就算他是魔鬼又怎样 Rick
At least the devil has a job.
至少魔鬼有份工作
At least he's active in the community.
至少他在社区很活跃
What do you do?
你干什么了
You eat our food and make gadgets.
你吃我们的 然后做些小玩意
Buh-bye.
走好不送
Wh...oops.
哎哟
I'm sorry, Mr. Needful.
真抱歉 所需先生
I'll clean that up.
我会清理干净的
I don't know what I can do about the ghost lady that came out of it, but...
我不知道怎么处理从里面跑出来的女鬼 但是
It's fine.
没关系
Summer, you know, your grandfather's right.
Summer 你爷爷说的没错
This store curses people.
这家商店诅咒人们
That's my business.
这就是我的生意
Well, yeah.
没错
Fast-food gives people diabetes,
快餐让人们患上糖尿病
and clothing stores have sweatshops.
服装店都有血汗工厂
Is there a company hiring teenagers that isn't evil?
雇佣青少年的公♥司♥有哪家不邪恶的吗
This is my first job.
这是我的第一份工作
You've been nice to me, Mr. Needful.
你对我很好 所需先生
You respect me.
你尊重我
Please, call me "the devil".
拜托了 叫我"魔鬼"
I'd rather not, actually. Yes, perhaps not during business hours.
还是算了吧 说得对 上班时间还是算了
I told you, I want to file a declaration that Pluto is a planet.
我说了 我要填写冥王星是行星的声明
Well, then my son's going to fail his science class,
那我儿子的科学课就要挂科了
and when that happens,
如果那样的话
I'm suing you first.
我第一个起诉的就是你们
I think I know what the "A" in NASA stands for.
我算明白NASA里的"A"是什么意思了
Dad, what's your endgame?
爸爸 你这游戏最后打算怎么办
Ain't no game, sucka.
这不是游戏 傻瓜
Why don't we just make the solar system with eight planets?
我就做一个八颗行星的太阳系不好吗
It's even easier.
不是还简单些吗
Sure, sure, and why don't we just burn Galileo at the stake
当然 那我们为什么不直接把伽利略烧死在刑柱上
for saying the sun is round?
因为他说太阳是圆的
Science isn't always easy, Morty.
科学并不总是那么简单的 Morty
Whoa! Whoa! What the hell?!
哇 哇 搞什么鬼
I'm King Flippy Nips, ruler of Pluto.
我是小疯疯国王 冥王星的统治者
We discovered you quite by accident during routine surveillance of your world.
我们在例行监视你们星球的时候偶然发现了你
You really gave it to those guys at NASA.
你真是给了航♥空♥航♥天♥局的人点颜色啊
I was...you know, sometimes science is about conviction.
我只是 你懂的 有时候科学有关信念
I'd like to introduce you to a few people that very much agree with you.
我要向你们介绍一些非常赞同你们的人
Oh, I...
哦 我
Plutonians.
冥王星的子民们
Jerry Smith is a scientist from earth,
Jerry Smith是地球来的科学家
where he's creating a model of our solar system.
他正在创造一个太阳系的模型
Jerry, tell Pluto about your decision.
Jerry 向冥王星宣布你的决定
Um...Pluto's a planet.
呃 冥王星是个行星
Pluto's a [beep] planet, bitch!
冥王星是个[哔]行星 贱♥人♥
Oh, man.
天哪
This is definitely gonna go to his head.
他的脑子绝对会被冲昏
If it's athletic prowess you desire, Principle Vagina,
如果你渴求的是矫健的身手 阴♥道♥校长
I might... I'll take it.
我可以 我收下了
B-but I haven't even...
但是我还没
Thank you very very much.
万分感谢
Great store. Great Place. Bye.
好商店 好地方 再见
Huh. Okay.
好吧
I must say, Summer, I thought your grandfather's outburst.
说实话 summer 我本以为你外公闹了一通以后
would have disrupted business,
会影响我的生意
But this is the best weekend I've had since Salem.
但这真是塞勒姆女巫审判以来我过得最好的周末了
Nice. "Wholesome Delight" for lunch?
真棒 那中午吃"美满康"怎么样
Is that the vegan place?
是那家素食店吗
Yeah, I love their soup.
没错 我爱死他家的汤了
I'm kind of soup-ed out.
我有点不宜喝汤来着
Mrs. Tate, is it? What do you desire?
Tate太太吗 你想要什么
Whoa, whoa, slow down, honey.
哇哦 哇 悠着点 亲爱的
Oh, is there a limit?
还有什么限制吗
Everything is free, right?
都是免费的 对吧
Let's just say you don't pay... with money.
这么说吧 你付的确实不是钱
That was perfect.
说得真好
You pay with the curses, right?
你会以被诅咒为代价 对吧
Um... I, well... but, Mrs. Tate why do you want cursed items?
呃 但 Tate太太你为何想要被诅咒的东西
Well, I'm going to get the curses removed at "Curse Purge Plus."
我会去"诅咒净"移除诅咒的
You know, the guy on TV?
就那个在电视上的家伙
What?
什么
Have you acquired creepy specific old stuff
你有从一家神秘的古董店或是
from a mysterious antique or thrift store
二手店收到些稀奇古怪的玩意吗
that gives you powers but [Bleep] you in unforeseeable ways?
这些东西可以给你神力但却以出乎预料的方式狠[哔]了你
Bring it to "Curse Purge Plus."
把东西带来"诅咒净"
I use science to un-curse the items for cash,
我靠科学收钱解咒
and you get to keep the powers.
然后你可以继续保有神力
This guys got mysterious sneaker to make him run faster, but guess what?
这家伙得了双可让他跑得飞快的神奇运动鞋
He would have to run until he died,making them worthless.
但他必须以跑至生命的尽头为代价 这就一文不值了
I remove the curse, making them worth, like,
我解了咒 让这鞋值
I don't know, 8 million dollars?
说不好 800万美元
See you at the olympics.
奥林匹克见
This eerily intelligent doll was theratening to murder its family.
这个有诡异智力的玩偶会威胁要杀死带走它的那家人
Now, it does their taxes.
现在 它可以为他们处理税务
Everything's deductible.
一切皆可减免
Don't pay for the cool stuff with your soul,
再不需要出♥卖♥♥♥灵魂来换取好东西
pay for it with money.
付钱就成
You konw, like how every other store in the world works.
就像这世界里其他的商店一样
We're located at first and main in old town.
本店坐落在老城第一主干道
Come on, come on down.
赶紧行动 机不可失
"First and..."
第一主...
Where you can get evil items for free!
免费的邪物也在这个地方
Diabolic son of a motherf...
这个该死的...
We're back on "Good moring, Pluto."
欢迎回到"早安 冥王星"
瑞克和莫蒂（2013）
Rick and Morty
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