瑞克和莫蒂（2013）

Rick and Morty S01E01

Part 3 Oct. 7, 2020, 2:25 p.m.

I don't even know what the hell it is!
这到底是啥鬼东西啊
We got to get out of here, morty!
快跑啊Morty
It's gonna kill us!
它会杀了我们的
We're gonna die!
我们要挂了
We're gonna die, morty!
我们要挂了
Oh, Morty, take a deep breath.
Morty 深呼吸
Breathe that, breathe that fresh air in, morty.
呼吸点新鲜空气
Y-you smell that?
闻到没
That's the smell of adventure, Morty.
充满了冒险气息啊 Morty
That's that's the smell of of of of a whole different evolutionary timeline.
一条完全不同的进化之路的味道
All right, Rick,
好了Rick
Look how much longer is this gonna be?
还要多久啊
Shouldn't I be back at school by now?
我是不是该回学校了
Are you joking me?
开什么玩笑
I mean, look at all the crazy crap surrounding us.
看看你周围这些鬼玩意儿
Look at that thing right there.
看那边那个
W-what the hell is that thing?
这是什么鬼
You think you're gonna see that kind of thing at school?
你觉得你在学校能看见
Look at it just lumbering around.
看它滚来滚去
It defies all logic that thing.
无法用逻辑理解
Yeah, Rick, I get it.
Rick 我明白
We're surrounded by monsters.
我们周围全是怪物
That's kind of the reason why I want to leave.
所以我才想走啊
Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta. Morty, you see this?
看见了吗 Morty
You see what we just stumbled upon, morty?
看见下面是什么了吗
Any idea what that is down there?
知道是啥吗
The mega trees?
奇异树吗
That's right, Morty
没错Morty
The mega trees with the mega fruit on them.
长着果子的奇异树
And that's what I'm talking about, morty. That's where my seeds are.
我要的就是这个呀 Morty 种子就在那儿
If we would have done what you wanted, I would have never have
如果我们按你说的来那就永远找不到了
Found them, because y because you're so in love with school.
因为你如此迷恋你的学校
All right, all right.
好吧好吧
So, what's so special about these seeds, anyways?
这些种子到底有什么特别的
You ask a lot of questions, Morty.
Morty 别问这么多问题
Not very charismatic.
这样不好
It makes you kind of an under underfoot figure.
很碍事的
Just take these shoes, Morty.
穿上这鞋子 Morty
They're sp special grappling shoes.
这是特制的吸附鞋
When you're wearing these things ba these babies,
只要穿着这宝贝儿
You can basically just walk on any surface you want, Morty
你想往哪儿走往哪儿走
Up, down, below, turn around to the left.
往上往下倒立转到左边
These things really bring it all together.
怎么都行
Aah!
啊
You have to turn them on, Morty!
Morty 你得先启动它们
The shoes have to be turned on!
先把鞋子的开关打开
I am not putting my father in a home!
我绝不会送我爸去养老院
He just came back into my life,
他才刚回到我的生活中
And you want to grab him and stuff him under a mattress
你就想这么把他塞床垫下面
like last month's victoria's secret?
跟上月的维多利亚的秘密产品目录为伍吗
I told you I was ordering you something for valentine's day.
我说了我是在给你订情人节礼物嘛
More importantly, your father is a horrible influence on our son.
而且你♥爸♥对我们的孩子有很不好的影响
Everything cool in here, Beth?
你们没问题吧 Beth
It's fine, Davin.
没事的 Davin
Okay, cool.
那就好
You know, we did something great today.
我们今天一起完成了一件伟大的事
There's nothing more noble and free than the heart of a horse.
没什么比马儿的心脏更高贵自♥由♥了
Since we're fighting,
既然我们在吵架
If you ever have an affair with that guy,
如果你跟那家伙有过什么
I will come to the hotel room and blow my brains out
我就去酒店房♥间吞子弹
all over your naked bodies.
把脑浆全崩到你的裸体上
Look, I appreciate the stress you're under,
我理解你承受的压力
but morty was having trouble in school way
但是Morty早在我爸搬进来前
Before my dad moved in,
学习就有问题了
and the only influence I can see rick having is that, for the first time in his life,
我唯一能看到Rick带来的影响就是这么久以来
Morty has a friend.
Morty第一次有了朋友
Well, maybe you're right.
或许你是对的
Uh, yeah, maybe I am.
或许是吧
I'm my father's daughter.
我是我爸的女儿
I'm smart.
我很聪明
Why do you think I'm a heart surgeon?
不然咋当上心外科医生的
Horse heart surgeon.
马心外科医生
Hello?
你好
Mrs. Smith?
Smith太太吗
This is principal Vagina no relation.
我是阴♥道♥校长别做联想
I wonder if you and morty's father might be able to have a
请问你和Morty的父亲今天下午能
Chat with me this afternoon?
过来谈谈吗
Morty, oh, you really d-did a number on your legs right now.
Morty你把你的腿弄得真惨
You know, you got to turn the shoes on, morty, for them to work.
你得把开关打开这鞋子才能用啊
Yeah, look I turned mine on.
看我的打开了
I had no problem getting down here.
我下来的多顺当
It was a leisurely breeze.
简直是轻松愉快
I'm in a lot of pain, rick.
我快疼死了 Rick
Yeah, I can see that.
嗯我看得出来
But do you think you'll still be able to help me collect my seeds, morty?
不过你应该还能帮我把种子采来的吧
Are you kidding me?!
开什么玩笑
That's it, Rick!
够了 Rick
That's the last straw!
我忍♥不了了
I can't believe this
简直不敢相信
I'm sitting here with both of my legs broken,
我两条腿都断了
and you're still asking me about getting those seeds?!
你还要我去帮你弄种子
Ooh! Ow! Oh!
嗷嗷嗷
Y-y-you're a monster.
你是个怪物
Y-you're like hitler, but but even hitler cared about Germany or something.
跟希♥特♥勒♥似的至少希♥特♥勒♥心里还装着德国
Okay, hold on just a second, morty.
好吧等我一下 Morty
Wow, Rick. That stuff just healed my broken legs instantly.
哇哦Rick 这个一下就治好了我的腿
I mean, I've never felt so good in my life.
这辈子没觉得这么好过
Thank you.
谢谢
Don't worry about it, Morty.
别管了 Morty
Just come help me get these seeds, all right, buddy?
快过来帮我弄种子
Sure thing, Rick.
没问题 Rick
Not that you asked,
虽然你没问
Morty, but what just happened there is I went into a future
不过刚才我去了一个未来的次元
Dimension with such advanced medicine
医学高度发达
that they had broken-leg serum at every corner drugstore.
治断腿的血清到处的药店都有卖♥♥的
The stuff was all over the place, morty.
这种东西满街都是
Wow, that's pretty crazy, Rick.
听上去好厉害啊 Rick
There's just one problem, Morty, one little hang-up.
就是有个小问题
The dimension I visited was so advanced,
我去的次元太发达了
they had also halted the aging process,
他们抑制了衰老
and everyone there was young, morty, and they had been forever.
那儿的每个人都很年轻也从未老过
I was the only old person there, morty.
我是那儿唯一的老人
It was like I was some sort of, you know, celebrity, walking around.
在那儿我就像一个名人般
I-I was fascinating to them.
他们觉得我可迷人了
There were a lot of attractive Women there, morty,
那边有很多美女
and they they they they all wanted time with me.
她们都想和我共度良宵
I had a lot of fun with a lot of young ladies,
我和很多美女玩得非常开心
but I spent so much time there, my interdimensional portal device
但我在那边待太久了次元传送装置它
it's got no charge left, Morty.
没有能量了
It's got no charge left.
没有能量了
What?!
啥
It's as good as garbage, morty.
它现在就是一废物
It's not gonna work anymore, morty.
已经没用了
Oh, geez, Rick, that's not good.
Rick 这可不妙
W-what are we gonna do?
那我们怎么办
I-I have to be back at school right now.
我现在得回学校了
How are we gonna get back home?
我们要怎么回家
There's ways to get back home, Morty.
有很多办法可以回家
It's just it's just gonna be a little bit of a hassle.
只是麻烦点而已
We're gonna have to go through interdimensional customs,
我们得去过空间海关