瑞克和莫蒂（2013）

Rick and Morty S01E06

Part 1 Oct. 7, 2020, 2:26 p.m.

Principal Vagina here don't let the name fool you.
我是阴♥道♥校长别被我的名字骗了
I'm very much in charge reminding you
我在此提醒你们
that tonight is our annual flu season dance.
今晚是我们的年度流感舞会
I don't know how many times I have to say this,
我不知道这句话还要说几遍
but if you have the flu, stay home.
得了流感的同学请待在家里
Hey.
嗨
The flu season dance is about awareness, not celebration.
举办流感舞会是为了提高防范意识不是为了庆祝
you don't bring dead babies to passover.
不会有人带着死掉的婴儿过逾越节
okay. Here we go.
好吧加油
H-hey, Jessica. Uh...
嗨 Jessica
What's up, Morty?
怎么了 Morty
what are you doing?
你想干嘛
um...
呃
Wait, wait. Were you about to talk... to her?
慢着你不会是打算和她说话吧
well... I mean, I was thinking about it.
我是想来着
Dude, stay in your league.
哥们儿别瞎想了
Look at how hot she is.
瞧她多美
You don't see me going to a bigger school in a wealthier district
你也没见我跑到更有钱的片区里更大的学校
and hitting on their prettiest girl.
去泡那儿最漂亮的妹子吧
Gee, thanks, Brad.
噢谢谢 Brad
I throw balls far.
这些傻屌♥别想靠近你
You want good words? Date a languager.
想听好听的去谈个话家啊(并没有languaer这个词)
try not to worry about it, Morty.
别多想 Morty
You're a good kid, and there's not a premium on that right now,
你是个好孩子虽然现在还没有什么优势
but you'll be getting girls sometime after Brad's out of shape.
但等Brad发福以后你就也能找到妹子啦
You're missing the point, dad.
爸你搞错重点了
I don't want girls. I want Jessica.
我不要妹子我要Jessica
ah, well, I remember feeling that way about
我以前也对某个人有过这样的感觉呢
a young lady named "Your mom,"
这个人叫做"你妈"
And that's not an urban diss.
这不是在骂人啊
Your mom was my Jessica.
你妈妈就是我的Jessica
I remember the first time I saw her. I thought
我还记得我第一次看到她的时候我就在想
"I should get her pregnant, and then she'll have to marry me."
"把她搞怀孕她就得嫁给我了"
I beg your pardon, Rick inappropriate.
Rick 你这话不太合适吧
Sorry, please proceed with your story
抱歉请接着讲
about banging my daughter in high school.
你高中时候搞我女儿的事迹吧
I'm not sure you want to take romantic advice from this guy, Morty.
感情方面的事儿你最好别听他的 Morty
His marriage is hanging from a thread.
他的婚姻已经悬于一线了
My marriage is fine, thank you.
我的婚姻好的很谢谢你啊
Jerry, it's your house
Jerry 这儿是你家
whatever you say it is is how it is
你说是什么就是什么吧
but I think a blind man could see that
但我觉得瞎子都能看出来
Beth is looking for the door.
Beth想结束这段婚姻
I barely have a reason to care, and even I noticed.
这事儿我根本不在乎也都发现了
Come on, Rick! Don't talk about my parents like that.
Rick 别这样说我的父母啊
Listen, Morty, I hate to break it to you,
听着 Morty 我也不想这么直白地告诉你
but what people call "Love"
但所谓的爱情
Is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed.
不过是让动物繁衍后代的化学反应罢了
It hits hard, Morty, then it slowly fades,
开始时让人头昏脑热然后就慢慢消退
leaving you stranded in a failing marriage.
只留给你一段失败的婚姻
I did it.
我是这样
Your parents are gonna do it.
你父母也会是这样
Break the cycle, Morty.
别重蹈覆辙 Morty
Rise above. Focus on science.
升华自我专注科学
All right, well, I'm gonna go get dressed for the dance.
好吧我去换舞会的衣服了
Yeah, I'm just going to... check on your mom.
我去看看你妈妈
Morty, hand me that screwdriver, huh?
Morty 把螺丝刀递给我
I'm almost finished making my ionic defibulizer, Morty.
我的离子除颤器就要完成了
It's gonna be great.
会很棒的
Hey, listen, Rick.
那个 Rick
Y-y-you know how you said that,
你之前不是说
you know, love is a chemical and all that stuff from earlier?
爱情是一种化学反应什么的嘛
Well, I was thinking, you know,
我在想
w-w could you make some sort of chemical thing
你能不能让Jessica的脑子里
happen inside of Jessica's mind, you know,
起点什么化学反应
so where she falls in love with me and all that sort of thing?
让她爱上我什么的
You know, like, maybe make some sort of love potion or something?
比如什么爱情药水之类的东西
Morty, that's such a poor use of my time.
完全是浪费我的时间
It's beneath me.
我不屑做这种事
Hand me the screwdriver.
把螺丝刀递给我
you know what? No, Rick!
不 Rick
I'm not gonna hand you the screwdriver.
别想我把螺丝刀递给你
I-I'm not gonna hand you anything ever again, Rick!
别想我再给你递任何东西
I'm always helping you with this and that and the other thing.
我老是帮你做这个帮你做那个
W-w-w-w-w-what about me, Rick?
那那那那我呢 Rick
W-w-w-w-why can't you just help me out once once, for once?
你怎怎怎么就不能帮我一次呢就一次
You're growing up fast, Morty.
你还真是长大了啊 Morty
You're growing into a real big thorn straight up into my ass.
已经长成一个烦人的大♥麻♥烦了
listen, this is called oxytocin.
这个叫后叶催产素
I extracted it from a vole.
我从田鼠的身体里提取的
Do you know what a vole is, Morty?
知道田鼠吗 Morty
You know what a vole is?
知道不
It's a it's a rodent that mates for life, Morty.
一种会结为终生伴侣的啮齿动物
This is the chemical released in a mammal's brain, you know,
这是在哺乳动物大脑里分泌的一种激素
that makes it fall in love.
让它坠入爱河
All right, Morty, I just got to combine it with some of your DNA.
Morty 我只需要把它和你的DNA混合起来
oh, well, okay.
噢好的
a hair, Morty.
一根头发就行 Morty
I need one of your hairs.
就要一根头发
This isn't "Game of thrones."
又不是《权利的游戏》(大尺度剧集)
all right, Morty.
好了 Morty
Whoever you smear this stuff on
只要你把这个抹在别人身上
will fall in love with you, and only you, forever.
这人就会爱上你永远只爱你一个
Are you happy now, Morty?
开心了 Morty
heck, yeah!
恩
Thank you, grandpa Rick.
谢谢 Rick外公
Hey, there's no... dangers or anything, or side effects, right?
没有什么危险或者副作用吧
w-w-w-what am I, a hack?
你当我是什么二流科学家吗
Go nuts, Morty. It's foolproof.
放心吧 Morty 绝对安全
Eh, unless she has the flu.
除非她得了流感
Beth, do y-you still love me?
Beth 你还爱我吗
ugh, what kind of question is that?
这算是什么问题
the "Yes or no" kind?
"爱"或者"不爱"的问题
Jerry, do you want homeless people to have homes?
Jerry 你会想让流浪汉有房♥子住吗
yes.
想啊
Are you gonna build them?
那你会给他们修房♥子吗
no.
不会
Then what good was the "Yes"?
那一个肯定的回答又有什么意义呢
wait, I-is loving me the house or the homeless people?
等等 "爱我" 是房♥子还是流浪汉
loving you is work, Jerry.
"爱你"是辛苦的劳动
Hard work, like building a homeless shelter
是给流浪汉修收♥容♥所♥的过程
nobody wants to say no to doing it
没有人"想"说不
but some people put the work in.
但总有人要付出努力
So, what do you say?
所以你说呢
Do you see me working here?
你觉得我有在努力吗
Does this conversation seem tedious to me?
我觉得这对话无聊吗
Sort of.
算是吧
Then I obviously sort of love you, don't I?
那明显我也算是爱你的
So stop asking, and maybe I'll love you more.
所以别问了说不定我会更爱你一点
Crap, they need me at the horse hospital.
靠我得去趟马医院
Puh! This late?
都这个点了
The racetrack had a starlight derby.
赛马场搞了场夜间德比赛
There was a seven-horse collision,
有七匹马撞上了
and Davin's there alone.
Davin一个人在那儿
**Flu, yo*
*流感唷
**you got to be aware*
*小心哦
**aware of all the flu*
*流感哟
**up in the air*
*空气里的流感
**I'm-a get me a shot *
*给我一针
**and make the flu go away *
*让流感滚