无为大师（2015）

Master of None S01E06

Part 5 Sept. 6, 2020, 4:12 p.m.

晚安 Alfred
Good night, Alfred.
晚安小Justin
Good night, Baby Justin.
晚安考拉幽灵
Good night, Ghost Koala.
晚安 Rachel
Good night, Rachel.
刚刚是你说的么
Did you say that?
不是
No.
问他从哪里来的
Ask him where he's from.
考拉幽灵你从哪里来的
Ghost Koala, where are you from?
我从悉尼来
I'm from Sydney.
我在纳什维尔度假
I'm here in Nashville on holiday.
你玩得怎么样
How are you liking it?
很不错
It's nice.
我希望
I wish they had some
所有的烧烤餐厅都有桉树
eucalyptus at all these barbecue restaurants.
考拉幽灵你也是个素食主义者吗
Ghost Koala, are you a vegetarian, too?
是的
Yeah.
但是我爱章鱼
But I love octopus.
车来了
This is our car.
在去机场之前
Hey, before we go to the airport,
你介意我们顺路去一下Tickler烧烤店
you mind if we swing by Tickler's Barbecue
让我买♥♥点白烧烤酱回去吗
so I can grab some of that white barbecue sauce to go?
我不知道啊
I don't know.
那不是在城的另一个方向吗
It's kind of on the other side of town, no?
但是我在Waze上查了下交通情况
Yeah, but I looked up the traffic on Waze,
只需要12分钟
and it'll take us 12 minutes.
-我们时间多的是 -你确定吗
- We got plenty of time. - Are you sure?
我不喜欢赶着去机场
I really hate rushing to the airport,
我也不想错过飞机
and I don't want to miss our flight.
没事的
Yeah, we'll be fine.
对不起飞机舱门已经关闭
I'm sorry. The flight is closed.
我们不能让任何人登机
We can't let anyone on board.
我就不懂了
I just don't understand.
门就在那
I mean, the door's right there.
你就不能打开让我们进吗
Can't you just open it and let us in?
不行
We can't.
如果奥巴马在这想上飞机
So if Barack Obama was here and he wanted to get on the plane,
你也不会让他上去的吗
there's no way you could let him on?
先生奥巴马总统有自己的飞机
Sir, President Barack Obama has his own plane.
叫做空军一号♥
It's called Air Force One.
好吧
All right, well, it's
很明显这个假设情景不成立
obviously broken in this hypothetical scenario.
我们能赶上的下一趟航♥班♥是几点
What's the next flight that we can get on?
下一趟去纽约拉瓜迪亚的飞机在五小时后
The next flight to LaGuardia leaves in five hours.
-不是吧 -晚上七点二十五
- No. - At 7:25 p.M.
到达纽约是十点五十五
You'd land in New York at 10:55.
我想我们就改这一班
I guess we'll take that flight,
我会负责改签费等
and I'll cover all the changes and stuff.
我很抱歉
I'm really sorry.
软件说12分钟
Waze said 12 minutes.
它算上堵车了我不知道怎么了
It accounts for traffic. I don't know what happened.
操
Shit.
你侄女的独奏会在今晚对吧
Your niece's recital thing was tonight, right?
没错
Yeah.
我很抱歉
I'm really sorry.
靠要早知道这也能买♥♥到Tickler酱汁就好了
Man, I wish I knew about Tickler's-To-Go.
(BGM: Loretta Lynn - You're The Reason Our Kids Are Ugly)
他们没法把咱们的座位排在一起
They weren't able to seat us together,
但我给了你靠窗的座位
but I gave you the window.
挺贴心的
Sweet.
(BGM: Tom T.Hall - Homecoming)
不好意思先生
Excuse me, sire.
这是Rachel Tickler Tickler烧烤帝国的女继承人
This is Rachel Tickler, heiress to the Tickler's Barbecue empire.
我是她的首席财务官我们明天有个很重要的会议
I'm her CFO. We have a very big meeting tomorrow.
有可能跟你换一下座位
Is there any way I could switch seats with you
这样我们可以谈论工作上的事情吗
so we could talk barbecue business?
这会对我意义重大
It would mean the world to me.
怎么了
What's happening?
我就是想换到我朋友旁边和她说话
Um, I just wanted to switch seats to talk to my friend.
我坐在那边的靠走道座位
I'm sitting in that aisle seat over there.
可以
Sure.
谢谢
Thank you.
-嘿 -嘿
- Hey. - Hey.
我还是觉得很槽糕
I still feel very terrible about what's happened,
我想送你一个礼物表达我的歉意
and I wanted to get you a gift to say I'm sorry.
这有点难度因为我们现在在飞机上
And it was a little hard 'cause we were in an airport,
但我认为能找到可以把我
but I think I found something that really
现在旋风般的糟糕心情
takes this whirlwind of emotions that I'm feeling right now
表达出来的实际物品
and puts it into a physical object.
我希望你能喜欢
I hope you like it.
纳什维尔酷毙了
"Nashville rocks."
的确很酷
It does rock.
是的
It does.
你也很酷
And you rock.
我之前干的事一点也不酷
And I don't rock for what I did earlier.
但
But, um...
我希望你看见这件T恤能记起纳什维尔很酷
I hope you see this shirt and remember that Nashville rocks
还有我们一起做得很疯狂的事
and you'll remember the times we had together that did rock
忘掉那些不酷的事情
and forget about the brief amount of non-rocking time we had.
这是两个加大号♥ 我很确定不是你的号♥
It is a XXL, which I'm pretty sure is not your size,
但是百分百纯棉
but it is 100% cotton.
谢谢
Thank you.
我很喜欢
I love it.
我会永远珍藏
And I will cherish it forever,
而且我等不及
and I really cannot wait
要用它做抹布来擦狗屎
to use this as a rag to clean shit up with.
我很感动
That means a lot.
你很酷
You rock.
非常感谢
Thank you so much.
我玩得很开心
I had a really wonderful time.
我也是
Yeah, I did too.
这听起来可能很疯狂
This may sound crazy
因为我知道我们一起不间断
'cause I know we've been hanging out nonstop
玩了24小时
for the past 24 hours,
加上那七个小时的生气时间
plus those seven bonus angry hours,
但是你饿吗
but are you hungry?
你想吃点东西吗
You want to get some food?
我可以去吃点东西
Yeah, I could go get some food.
但是我对调味品很挑剔
But I'm really picky about my condiments.
等下
Wait.
你不会恰好有三大瓶
You don't happen to have three large bottles
Tickler白烧烤酱吧
of Tickler's white barbecue sauce, do you?
我有
I did,
但我在飞机上趁你上厕所的时候
but I drank all three bottles on the plane
全部喝完了
when you went to the bathroom.
太不幸了
Oh, that's too bad.
好吧很高兴见到你
Well, it was really nice seeing you.
-拜 -拜
- Bye. - Bye.
等一下我还有
Wait, I have some!
我来了我来了我来了
I'm coming. I'm coming. I'm coming. I'm coming.
我们要跟着一些丰满的人
So should we follow around some full-bodied people,
去找好地方吃饭吗
find a good place to eat?
(BGM: Townes Van Zandt - Be Here To Love Me)