老爸有招

Man with a Plan S04E10

Part 2 July 7, 2020, 2:45 p.m.

you wanted to go to military school?
爸爸的眼睛瞪得像铜铃妈妈的嘴唇抖得像筛子
Dad's eyes got big and Mom's lip trembled.
太棒了
This is so great.
他们的花招全招呼在我身上了现在换我了
I fell for all their tricks and now I get payback.
接下来怎么办
So what's next?
没事了我们已经拆掉了他们最大的招数
Nothing. We just blew up their biggest move.
也许还会再试一两个新招不过挺不了多久
They might try one or two other things, but it won't last.
他们一天天地在变老体力越来越差
Every day they get a little older and a little tireder.
好的聪明孩子军事学校不去了
All right, smart guy, military school's off.
他们现在根本不严格
They weren't as strict as I wanted them to be.
居然允许学生微笑了
They started letting people smile.
在家我可以比他们更加严格
But I can straighten you out right here.
既然不愿意写作业就来工作吧
You won't do homework, you'll do work-work.
去车道等我准备出出汗亲爱的
Meet me in the driveway and get ready to sweat. Hi, honey.
工作这是打游戏的手不是过真实生活的手
Work? These are video game hands, not real-life hands.
放心我知道的怎么处理
Relax. I know how to deal with this.
他什么表情
How'd he look?
记得他以前骑自行车下山的时候
Remember when he was going down the hill on his bicycle
然后车把掉了
and the handlebars came off?
表情一模一样
He looked like that. u202d
好的你的工作就是把这些乱七八糟的砖块
Okay, your job is to take this messy pile of bricks over here
搬到那边在木架上码放整齐
and turn it into a neat stack of bricks on the pallet over there.
-听起来好难 -本来就难
- That sounds hard. - u202dBecause it is.
如果你不愿意做作业
If you can't be bothered to do homework,
以后到社会上人们会只让你做体力活
the only thing people are gonna trust you with is grunt work.
但做作业的孩子
And the kids who did homework
工作就轻松了舒服地在办公室里吃着免费的马芬蛋糕
will get nice, cushy office jobs with free muffins.
免费的马芬蛋糕泰迪想想你放弃了什么
Free muffins, Teddy. Think about what you're giving up.
所以我会成为一个砌砖工人
So I'm gonna be a bricklayer?
不不不傻孩子是搬砖工人
No, no, my friend, you're a brick mover.
你只比砖高级一点点
You're one step above the brick.
要是砖自己有腿也不需要你了
If the brick had legs, it wouldn't need you.
开始搬吧
Get cracking.
看看他在太阳下
Look at him out there in the sun,
满身大汗充满悔意
full of sweat and regret. u202d
刚刚把自己的脚砸了
He just dropped a brick on his foot.
这下太好了
This is going great. u202dYeah.
他真是做得乱七八糟
He's really... not doing that right.
看那些缝隙安迪砖块中间有空隙
Th-Th-There's gaps, Andi, gaps in the stack.
他才刚刚开始
Well, he's just getting started.
对但开始才是最重要的
Yeah, but the beginning is where you have to be perfect
否则到上面会全部塌掉
or everything else is out of whack.
看他垒的边惨不忍♥睹
Look at his edges-- they're all cattywampus.
泰迪这不是这么垒的
That's-that's-that's-that's not how you do it.
要是有空隙四个角就不是方的了
If you got gaps, your corners aren't square.
我谈砖的时候你的注意力在哪呢
Have you never paid attention to me when I talk about bricks?
我们得从头再摆
We'll just have to start this whole thing over.
看起来不错啊爸爸
Hmm? That looks good, Dad.
你觉得这就不错了等我摆好再夸吧
Oh, you think it looks good now, you just wait till I'm done.
你说得对
You were right.
开头就犯错接下来他会全都替我♥干♥了
I messed the first few up and he just took over.
我就是这么棒
Yup, I'm good.
要是给这方面打分我绝对能进哈佛
If they gave grades for this, I would get into Harvard.
看看这完美的砖阵
Look at that perfect stack of bricks.
今天我们完成了它
Now we accomplished something today.
是吗可泰迪根本不在这
Did we? 'Cause Teddy's not even here anymore.
很好因为他会拖慢我的速度
Good, he was slowing me down.
亚当我们应该教他道理
Adam, we were supposed to be teaching him a lesson,
结果你把工作都做完了
but instead you did all the work.
这是给我们自己上了一课
It's like he taught us a lesson.
你看到了啊他摆得有空隙
But you saw it, he had gaps.
泰迪看到这个他就懂了
When Teddy sees this, he will know.
他唯一能懂的就是如何逃掉搬砖的工作
The only thing he'll know is how to get out of stacking bricks.
等等你觉得他知道我会出手
Wait a minute, do you think he messed up on purpose,
所以是故意搞砸的吗
knowing I would take over?
那需要泰迪把一个想法
Ah, that would require Teddy taking one thought,
和另一个想法放到一起
putting it together with another thought,
然后想出新的办法
and making a new thought.
他做得到吗
Can he do that?
我是想说不能可我确实冲出来
I would have said no, but I'm the chump out here
现在满身是砖渣滓
covered in brick dust.
让孩子做作业是个没完没了的折磨
Getting kids to do homework is a never-ending struggle.
我的女儿们在学五年级的中文
My girls are in their fifth year of Chinese,
可口语还是像个四年级的
but they still speak like fourth-years,
于是我没收了她们的大提琴惩罚她们
so I punish them by taking away their cellos.
我们的孩子以后是给他的孩子打工的
Our kids are gonna be working for his kids.
惨的是她们
Joke's on them.
我们家娃不可能是好员工
Our kids'll be terrible employees.
泰迪要是不赶紧好好表现
If Teddy doesn't get his act together,
就得跟我一样暑假补课了
he's gonna wind up in summer school like I did.
我想起来了
Hey, that's right.
老唐要不你去劝劝泰迪吧
Don, maybe you could talk some sense into Teddy, huh?
你吃过亏
You learned your lesson.
那个夏天我所有朋友都去夏令营了
That summer, all my friends went to camp,
我却得一直跟枝老师待在图书馆
and I had to sit in the library with Mrs. Branch,
一位无聊到被以树来命名的女士
a lady so boring she was named after a tree.
这一招也许对泰迪管用
You know, that could work on Teddy.
他肯定不喜欢暑期补课
He'd hate the idea of summer school.
对你带他去吃个午饭老唐
Yeah. Take him to lunch, Don.
跟他讲讲你没好好做作业的时候发生了什么
Tell him what happened when you didn't do your homework.
他会听的不知道为什么他觉得你很酷
He'll listen to you. He thinks you're cool for some reason.
我确实很酷
I am cool.
我也不想说出来但是你老了而我没有
I hate to break it to you, but you got old and I didn't.
那你带我家女儿们去吃顿饭吧
Then take my girls to lunch.
也许你能搞清楚为什么她们
Maybe you can find out why they've fallen behind
在俄♥罗♥斯♥文学读书俱乐部表现不好
in their Russian literature book club.
洛厄尔要不这样吧你今天回家休息一天
You know what, Lowell? Just go home for the day.
米克酒馆
一个无聊到被以树命名的女人
A woman so boring she was named after a tree.
枝老师
Mrs. Branch.
没反应
Nothing?
好吧你也可能会这样
Anyway, that's what can happen to you.
是这样的老唐伯伯
See, the thing is, Uncle Don,
泰迪想要不同的生活
Teddy wants a different lifestyle.
没错我可不想因为那个男人的要求
Yeah. I'm not climbing the corporate ladder
在职场步步高升
just 'cause The Man wants me to.
那个男人我好讨厌他
The Man. I hate that guy.
但是你在为他工作
But you work for The Man.
你是他的爪牙
You're his stooge.
你收回这句话
You take that back.
如果你知道如何摆脱这个困境
If you know a way off this hamster wheel,
我愿意听听
I'm listening.
怎么样你说服泰迪了吗
So, did you get through to Teddy?
没有但是泰迪说服了我
No, but Teddy got through to me.
他看待问题的角度和我们不同
He's really zigging where the rest of us zag.
什么这是什么意思
What? What does that mean?
意思就是凯特和泰迪的哲学
Well, it means that Kate and Teddy's philosophy
让我产生了共鸣
really spoke to me.
所以我打算回家睡个午觉
So, I'm gonna zag on home and take a nap.
等等凯特也去了
Wait. Kate was there?
对我去接泰迪的时候她也上了车
Yeah. When I went to pick up Teddy, she hopped in the car.
她说午饭她来请所以我就没多问了
She said lunch was on her, so I stopped asking questions.
泰迪和凯特从来不一起玩
Teddy and Katie never hang out together.
为什么她会一起去吃饭
Why would she be at that lunch?
好问题
Good question.
你知道还有一个细节吗
And you know something else? u202dHmm?
昨天她也在他房♥间里
She was in his room yesterday.
自从上次她不小心撞见他对着镜子练电臀
She hasn't been in there since she caught him trying to twerk
她就再没进去过了
in front of his mirror.
肯定有情况
Something's up.
难道是...
You don't think...