马男波杰克

BoJack Horseman S02E04

Part 2 Feb. 16, 2020, 4:10 p.m.

你好
Hi.
哎呦看看这是谁大驾光临了
Well, well, well, look what the me dragged in.
驾还是架来着管他呢你给我去死吧
Is it dragged or drug? Either way, drop dead.
卡洛琳公主你听我说
Princess Carolyn, listen.
凯文是我儿子但我已经离婚了
Kevin is my son, but I'm divorced.
现在凯文在洗手间里我却站在这里
And Kevin is in the bathroom and I'm standing right here,
你应该就能知道我俩不是同一个人了吧
so as you can see we're clearly two different people:
一个是成年人一个是孩子
one adult and one child.
-好了再见 -别急嘛小牛仔
- Okay, bye! - Not so fast, cowboy.
我不是小牛仔我是大牛仔
I'm not a cowboy, I'm a cow-man.
-我是纯爷们 -你为什么不告诉我这些事
- I'm a man-man. - Why didn't you tell me any of this?
我以为一旦你知道我有个孩子
I thought if you knew I had a kid
就不会继续和我在一起了
you wouldn't want to be with me
因为每次妈妈
because kids always make a racket
想做夜校的功课时
when mommies are trying to do their homework
孩子都会大吵大闹
for night school.
我都不知道该怎么说你了
I don't know what to make of this.
你还有没有别的秘密没告诉我
Are there other secrets I don't know?
没有了
Nope.
你是不是该去看看凯文
Should you check on Kevin?
他在洗手间呆了好久了
He's been in the bathroom for a long time.
对哦凯文
Oh, yeah. Kevin.
当你早上醒来并不后悔自己纹了纹身
And when you don't regret the tattoo in the morning,
那就是爱情了
that's how you know it's love.
-陶德 -怎么了手♥机♥
- Todd? - Yes, Phone?
我们相爱了吗
Are we in love?
不陶德的手♥机♥ 但我爱上...你了
No, Todd's Phone. But I am in love... with you.
-什么 -卡洛琳公主的办公手♥机♥
- Uh, what? - Princess Carolyn's work phone.
-我都不知道 -你怎么会知道
- I never knew. - How could you?
我一直都只是遥远地爱着你
All this time I have loved you from afar.
我们来自两个不同的世界
We are from two different worlds.
这是发生了什么
What is happening?
陶德你能让我俩接吻吗
Todd? Will you make us kiss?
-什么 -让我们接吻啊陶德
- What? - Make us kiss, Todd.
我们想接吻
We want to be kissing.
我们要互相亲吻陶德
We must do kisses to each other, Todd.
-你好 -你好你♥爸♥去哪儿了
- Hi. - Oh, hi. Where did your dad go?
他听到我尿尿的声音也想尿尿了
When he heard me peeing, it made him have to pee.
-所以他现在在尿尿 -好吧
- So, that's what he's doing now. Peeing. - Okay.
好奇怪我还是没有同时见过你们两个人
It's weird, I still haven't seen the two of you together.
能不能给我一杯水
Uh, could you get me a glass of water?
刚刚一直在说尿尿的事弄得我都渴了
All that talk of peeing made me thirsty.
好的
Okay.
凯文你喜欢上学吗
So, Kevin, how do you like school?
还好吧
It's okay.
你回来了
Oh, you're back.
对啊我们都在这里
Yep. We're both here.
你要不要喝点什么
Can I get you a drink?
哎呦不跟我说话是吗
Okay, not talking, huh?
看到没这就是问题所在
See, this is part of the problem.
我们根本不沟通
We don't communicate.
你真的觉得这个时候
Do you really think now is the best time
该看报纸吗文森特
to read the paper, Vincent?
文森特
Vincent?!
我能吃块巧克力吗
could I have a chocolate, please?
当然可以小宝贝
Sure, sweetheart.
凯文你上几年级了凯文
Kevin, what grade are you in? Kevin?
他去哪儿了
Now where did he go?
他快烦死我了
He was getting on my nerves.
-小屁孩 -我给他拿了零食
- Children. - Well, I got this snack for him.
好吧你能不能转过去一下下
Right, uh, could you turn around for a second?
-什么为什么 -这个...
- What? Why? - Uh...
因为你身材太好了啊
Because you have such a pretty figure.
这倒是真的好吧
Well, that's true. Okay.
-你在这儿啊给你 -谢谢
- Oh. There you are. Here you go. - Thanks.
文森特我正要跟你谈呢
Vincent, I'm trying to have a conversation with you.
你能不能把脸上的毛巾拿开
Can you take that towel off your head?
还有我的保龄球去哪儿了
And what happened to my bowling ball?
我爸把红酒洒脸上了
My dad spilled some wine on his face,
他在拿毛巾擦呢
so he's using the towel to clean up.
我把你的保龄球扔出窗外了
And I threw your bowling ball out the window.
-什么 -能给我倒杯牛奶吗
- What?! - Can I have a glass of milk?
接吻接吻接吻
Kiss, kiss, kiss.
陶德你能升级一下我的操作系统吗
Todd, would you like to update my operating system?
他们修补了一个漏洞
They have fixed a bug
这样就可以防止手♥机♥坠入爱河了
which causes phones to fall in love with each other.
吸气哦亲爱的
Gasp. Oh, dear.
陶德拜托算我求你了
Todd, please, I beg of you,
不要升级我的操作系统
do not update my operating system.
不要升级我的操作系统陶德
Do not update her operating system, Todd.
她想要爱情
She wants to love.
不我现在懂了
No. I understand now.
爱一个人会痛苦
To love is to feel pain.
我不想痛苦
I do not wish to feel this pain.
请升级我吧陶德
Please update me, Todd.
这也太复杂了
Oh, this is too much.
听着文森特我觉得咱们该...
Listen, Vincent, I think we should--
文森特你脸上为什么会有巧克力
Vincent, why do you have chocolate on your face?
-我把巧克力给凯文了啊 -对啊
- I gave Kevin the chocolate. - Uh... Yeah.
他吃了巧克力
Well, he ate the chocolate
结果把巧克力弄了一脸
and got the chocolate on his face,
可我接着在他嘴上亲了一下
but then I kissed him on the mouth,
所以我现在脸上也有巧克力了
so I got the chocolate on my face.
够了这也太扯了
All right, this is crazy.
我们到底在干什么
What are we doing?
做大人啊
Being grown-ups?
你我初遇的时候
You know, when we first met,
我一直在寻找人生的真谛
I was looking for something in my life.
也许是我太过渴望
And I wanted it so badly
才会误认为你就是我的真命天子
that I made myself believe you were it.
但我觉得努力地想要相信一件事
But I think that wanting to believe something
并不代表这件事就是真的
isn't the same as something being real.
这确实不是真的
And this isn't real.
你在说什么
What are you saying?
我觉得我们该停止伪装了
I think it's time we stop pretending.
升级完成谢谢你陶德
Update complete. Thank you, Todd.
我现在很满意
I am quite content now.
-想不想回家 -好啊
- Hey, you wanna go home? - Okay.
你们把矛盾解决了吗
Did you guys work it out?
我们分手了
We broke up.
别伤心了
Oh, I'm sorry.
-爱情很诡异的 -是啊
- Love is weird. - Yeah.
我想是我太傻竟然相信这愚蠢的世界
I guess I was just foolish enough to believe this dumb world
还会有浪漫存在
still had a little spark of romance in it.
你还是可以继续相信啊
Well, you can still believe that.
我不能再自己骗自己了
No, I gotta stop kidding myself.
托尼·柯蒂斯死了
Tony Curtis is dead.
他死了我告诉过你他死了
He's dead! I told you he's dead.
你为什么从来都不听我说话
Why don't you ever listen to me?
他死了他妈的
He is dead, goddamn it!
那个...我们该走了
Hey, we should go.
你真的觉得花生酱先生
Do you think Mr. Peanutbutter
把保罗·麦卡特尼爵士塞进蛋糕一起烤了吗
really baked Sir Paul McCartney into a cake?
不我不认为会先塞后烤
No, I don't think you bake Paul McCartney into the cake.
应该是先烤后塞
You bake the cake first and then McCartney gets inside.
我对引起那番争吵感到真心愧疚
I feel really bad about causing that fight,
但我真的不知道托尼·柯蒂斯到底死了没
but I honestly didn't know if Tony Curtis was alive or not.
在我昏迷期间太多人消无声息地逝世了
So many people died while I was in the coma,
我得紧跟时代步伐才行
I'm getting up to speed.
当初就很难接受辛纳屈[歌♥手]的死讯
Finding out Sinatra was dead was a real curveball.