雷蒙·斯尼奇的不幸历险（2017）

A Series of Unfortunate Events S03E02

Part 2 July 20, 2020, 11:59 a.m.

but I need to get back to the city.
有烟必有火
Where there's smoke, there's fire, and...
-我看到了很多烟 -我年轻时是个雪童军
- I've seen a lot of smoke. - I was a Snow Scout in my youth,
即便我很快就退出了
and even a peewee-level dropout
也看得出以你现在的情况根本不能走下山去
can see that you're in no condition to walk down a mountain.
我打算滑雪
I'm planning to ski.
或许我可以随和地送你一程
Perhaps I could be accommodating and give you a ride.
-你有车吗 -我其实
- You have a car? - I was thinking of
也打算回城的
going to the city actually myself.
人说距离产生美
They say absence makes the heart grow fonder,
希望帖木儿先生也会是如此
and I hope that's true of Mr. Tamerlane.
我走时他可正生我气呢
He was very mad at me when I left.
你愿意不止搭个车吗
How would you like more than just a ride?
你想在金融界找份文职工作吗
How would you like a desk job in the financial sector?
-我更喜欢需要走路的工作 -我们有空缺
- I prefer to work on my feet. - We have an opening.
我的长♥期♥秘书最近回了温尼伯
My longtime secretary recently returned to Winnipeg.
她母亲似乎过世了
It seems that her mother passed away,
现在她继承了女公爵爵位
and now she's the duchess of something.
那会非常精彩的
It'll be plenty of excitement.
"有烟必有火"是个说法
"Where there's smoke, there's fire" is an expression
意为如果看上去不对劲一般就是不对劲
that means if something seems wrong, it usually is.
我可以向你保证办公室会忙得团团转
I can promise you the office will be buzzing with activity.
我现在就能听到嗡嗡声
I can hear it now.
我需要你快速安静地靠近我
I need you to move toward me very quickly and very quietly.
冰蜂蜜
Ice bees!
我可能需要搭你的车
I may need that ride.
很遗憾在忧虑山顶发生了
I'm sorry to say that there is a great deal of wrong
很多不该发生的事
at the top of Mount Fraught...
主要发生在珊妮·波德莱尔身上
mostly for Sunny Baudelaire.
这太不该了对我来说
This is a great deal of wrong, for me!
我应该站在世界之巅的
I am supposed to be at the top of the world,
但结果他们俩来了指责贬低我
but instead, those two show up, try and berate and belittle me.
你知道这感觉吗
Do you know how it feels
如此努力地取悦
to try so hard to please people
不能欣赏你才华的人
who fail to recognize your talent?
-完全不知道 -我需要根烟
- Not at all. - I need a cigarette,
不管这绿棒棒是什么
or whatever these green sticks are.
我自己来
I got it.
你似乎压力很大老大
You seem stressed, boss.
你该深呼吸几下或许散散步[宪法]
You should take some deep breaths. Maybe a short constitutional.
我才没功夫读一堆修正案呢
I don't have time to read a bunch of amendments!
我得想办法
I need to find a way
让我的导师觉得我非常成功
to have my mentors think I'm a raging success.
-或许我该演个节目 -这是好主意吗
- What if I put on a show? - Is that a good idea?
他们似乎不怎么欣赏艺术
They don't seem like they appreciate the arts.
不是个好主意是个好极了的主意
It's not a good idea. It's a stupendous idea!
一段歌♥舞
A little song, a little dance,
《驯悍记》《麦克白》
一段《驯麦克白记》的独白
a monologue from The Taming of Macbeth.
还有什么比晚餐剧院更受人喜爱的
What's more beloved than dinner theater?
这才早餐
It's breakfast.
那得等婴儿做好了的
It will be, once the baby cooks it.
这次最好是热的婴儿
And it better be hot this time, baby!
珊妮·波德莱尔有好几个需要解决的问题
Sunny Baudelaire had several problems she needed to solve.
她被坏人挟持在了山巅上
She was being held captive by villains on top of a mountain
得想办法逃跑
and needed an escape.
她还得为那些坏人做一顿热饭
She needed to cook a hot breakfast for those same villains
尽管她只有几条冷鲑鱼
with only a few cold salmon,
她还需要个办法给VFD的特工打信♥号♥♥
and she needed a way to signal to the V.F.D. agent
她才听说那人就在山上
she'd recently heard was on the mountain,
她希望那人能来救她
who she hoped might be able to rescue her.
什么样的婴儿都不会生火啊
What kind of baby doesn't know how to start a fire?
抽烟对你很不好的
Smoking is very, very bad for you.
所以只许用这个做饭
So only use this to cook with.
知道了吗
Got it?
快点我好饿
Hurry, I'm famished!
情况很糟糕
It was a terrible situation,
但珊妮曾多次看着哥哥姐姐
but Sunny had watched her siblings
靠聪明的点子从糟糕情况中脱身
escape many terrible situations with clever ideas.
所以当奥拉夫伯爵把那根奇怪的绿烟递给她后
So when Count Olaf gave her that odd, green cigarette,
她想到了一个能解决她问题的点子
it gave her an idea that could solve all of her problems.
你要用那根奇怪的绿烟来熏鲑鱼吗
You're gonna use that odd, green cigarette to smoke that salmon?
真是个聪明的点子
Hey, that's a clever idea.
看啊绿烟
Look, green smoke.
好奇怪
That's odd.
是从忧虑山上飘来的
It's coming from Mount Fraught.
那是绿色可燃装置
It's a Verdant Flammable Device.
我读到VFD用这个来发信♥号♥♥
I read that V.F.D. use them for sending signals.
那么上面可能是VFD的人
So it could be someone from V.F.D. up there.
也可能是珊妮
Or it could be Sunny.
-我们得上去 -到山顶很远的
- We have to get up there. - It's a long way to the top.
我们得通过方言锁门回去
We have to go back through the Vernacularly Fastened Door,
爬下垂直排烟道
down the Vertical Flame Diversion,
再跟雪童军走一样的山路
and hike the same road the Scouts--
还有通往山顶的更直接的路
There's a more direct way to the top.
不没有了看地图
No, there's not. Look at the map.
看瀑布
Look at the waterfall.
于是我说 "我知道了我们坐电梯吧"
So I said, "Oh, I know! We'll take the elevator,"
然后我就把他们推了下去
and I pushed them!
真优雅
How elegant.
-但低效 -他们可害怕了
- If ineffective. - They were certainly scared.
我以为他们的眼睛会从脑袋里蹦出来呢
I thought their eyes were going to pop out of their heads!
奥拉夫可以跟你学学亲爱的
Olaf could learn from you, my dear.
他太做作太戏精了
He's so flashy, so theatrical.
他总要把什么事都做得很夸张
He has to make everything a big production.
鼓点开幕来吧
Drumroll! Curtain! Toss it up.
拉下来
I mean, down curtain.
女...
La...
女士和先生
Lady and gentleman,
准备听到一个可怕的故事吧
prepare for a tale so horrifying
你们的头发都会竖起来的
it will make the hair on your head stand straight up.
糟糕
Ooh, no.
是掉落...
Uh, fall right out.
这也不...
Ooh, that's also not...
这个故事是关于纵火
It is a tale of arson...
和谋杀
and murder.
爬虫学家被自己的毒液毒死
The herpetologist, poisoned by his own venom.
成年女人被喂了成年水蛭
The fullygrown woman fed to fullygrown leeches.
志愿者在各种风景优美的地方
The volunteers murdered to death
被杀死
in various scenic locales.
但最重要的是
But most of all,
这个故事是关于
it is the tale...
我
of me.
因为我正是犯下了这些可怕行径的人
For I am the one who committed all of those terrible deeds.
我奥拉夫伯爵
Me, Count Olaf,
这世上最帅气最成功
the handsomest, most successful,
最理当获得肯定的人
most deserving-of-approval person alive!
我们直接开始歌♥舞吧
Maybe we should just move along to the production number.
一二
And a one, and a two,
三四五
and a three, four, five!
够了
Enough!
我们招募你时
When we recruited you,
是为了在各地纵火制♥造♥毁灭
it was to spread fire and destruction across the land.
不是让你跟一群没才华的傻瓜瞎蹦跶
Not to prance around with a bunch of talentless fools.
他们还敢自称演员
Who call themselves actors.
个人而言我才不会想演戏呢
Personally, I would never want to act.
我是做金融的
I'm in the financial sector.
本来一切顺利的直到你错过了节奏
It was all going swimmingly until you botched the cue!
说到游泳熏鲑鱼的味儿好香
Speaking of swimming, the smoked salmon smells great.
傻瓜
Fools!
烟灭了
The smoke went out.