金色年代

The Goldbergs S06E22

Part 1 Dec. 7, 2019, 2:09 p.m.

母亲节啊
Ah, Mother's Day.
大多数家庭只要做份早餐送到妈妈床上
For most families, all you'd have to do is make breakfast in bed,
但对金伯格一家而言
but for the Goldbergs,
"溺爱母亲节"是一年中最可怕的节日
"Smother's Day" was the most dreaded holiday of the year.
那是24小时不间断的抱抱节
It was a 24-hour, nonstop snuggle fest
我们年纪越大越糟糕
that got worse as we got older.
我的天这坨恶心的东西是什么
Oh, my God, what is this disgusting glop?
我逃离母亲节的单程票衰仔
My one-way ticket out of Mother's Day, sucka.
糟糕糟糕我彻底忘了
Oh balls, oh balls! I completely forgot!
你居然会忘记
How could you forget?
这是我们一年中最糟的一天
It's the worst day of our year,
可照片永远摆在那
but it's on display forever!
快看金伯格家的耻辱壁炉架
Behold the Goldberg mantel of shame.
我知道作为最小的我最惨
I know. As the baby, I'm the one who gets the worst of it!
还是说你忘了这个
Or have you forgotten this?
这个真的发生过
This...actually...happened.
是啊在这一屋子的扭曲照片之中
Yeah, in a house full of messed up photos,
那张绝对是最糟糕的
that is for sure the worst.
求你了早餐算我一份吧
Please, let me join in on your breakfast!
-我可以做烤吐司 -已经做了
- Here, I can make toast! - ?Already did.
不我只会做那个
No! That's all I'm capable of!
她来了
There she is!
猜猜今天是什么特别的日子美女
Guess what special day it is, pretty lady?
母亲节快乐
Happy Mother's Day!
母亲节到了我的节日
It's Mother's Day! For me!
看看我自己为你做了什么
Look what I alone made for you!
我的小甜心给我烧了比利时华夫饼焦炭
Aww, my Sugartush charred me a Belgian waffle
还在上面放了朵有毒的花
and put a poison flower on top.
我天不亮就起床以确保一切都很完美
I woke up at dawn just to make everything right
为了我亲爱的熊妈妈
for my wonderful mama-bear!
宝贝快回去睡觉
Aw, Schmoo. Go back to bed.
拜托不要我是说
Please no! I mean,
得带上他一起去母亲节合影环节
we need him for your Mother's Day photo session.
只有你和爱丽卡
Oh, my day will be plenty special
今天也会很特别的
with just you and Erica.
母亲节快乐
Happy Mother's Day.
抱歉可我鼻子不通气
Sorry, but so much sinus pressure.
不你的感冒加重了
Oh, no! Your cold got worse.
拜托她很明显是装的
Aw, come on! She's clearly faking!
你真丢人亚当
Shame on you, Adam!
我过去几周都在密切关注
For the past week, I have been closely monitoring
爱丽卡的咳嗽鼻塞嗓子酸痛
Erica's cough, sniffles, sore throat,
胃反酸和眼睛失控抽搐
sour tummy, and uncontrollable eye twitch.
瞧它自己乱抽因为不是装的
See? It does it on its own 'cause it's real.
我会在沙发上铺张毯子
Well, I'll go put some blankets on the couch
好让你躺着看电视
so you can lie down and watch TV.
想逃避为老妈庆祝这样做就对了
And that's how you get out of honoring your mother.
没错数周来我都在播种担忧的种子
That's right. For weeks, I've been planting seeds of worry.
今天咳嗽一声明天假装肌肉酸痛
A tiny cough here, a body ache there,
每一天每一步都经过计算直到此刻
every day a calculated move leading to this very moment.
你这混账天才
Bastard genius!
好了我在沙发上给爱丽卡搭好了窝
Okay, I built a nest for Erica on the couch
我把巴瑞的毯子用烘衣机烘过了
and I ran Barry's blanket through the dryer.
该去拍纪念照了亚当
Time for our big photo op, Adam!
准备好笑肌
Get your smile muscles ready!
好吧看来我得是那个
Ugh, fine! I guess I'll be the one
在母亲节陪老妈的人了
who spends Mother's Day with his mother.
我们速战速决
Let's just make it super fast
因为我今天和金戴夫有大计划
'cause I got big plans today with Dave Kim.
-计划什么计划 -《风云际会》
- Plans? What plans? - ?"Willow"!
乔治·卢卡斯
It's George Lucas'
继《星球大战》之后的又一部大♥片♥
blockbuster follow-up to "Star Wars"!
太自私了
Wow, it's like super selfish
居然把电影排在老妈前面
to pick some movie over your mom.
我甚至不知道该说什么
I don't even know what to say.
我知道
I do.
你这个儿子太糟糕了
You're a bad son.
我们速速去拍照片吧
Let's just go and take these photos super fast
因为《风云际会》
'cause "Willow"!
母亲节到了
It's Mother's Day.
金色年代第六季第二十二集
那是一九八几年的五月一日
It was May 1st, 1980-something,
我们正在和老爸共度优质时光
and we were spending some quality time with our dad
还有大卫·哈塞尔霍夫
and David Hasselhoff.
等等
Whoa, wait!
你们在看《霹雳游侠》
You guys are watching "Knight Rider"
却不叫我一起
and didn't even invite me?
往那边点
Scootch!
你去那边我已经坐在这了
You scootch. I'm already here.
那是沙发上最好的位置
That's the best spot on the couch
总是被你霸占着我受够了
and I'm sick of you always hogging it.
见鬼我听不到傲慢的车在说什么了
Damn it! I can't hear the snooty car talk.
要么坐下要么出去
Either sit down, or get out.
你当然会站在爱丽卡一边
Of course you take Erica's side.
又一次被遗忘的老二吃了亏
Once again, the forgotten middle child gets screwed!
又来这一套
Aw, not this crap.
又开始说你的疯狂理论
Here we go again with your crazy
中间的孩子阴谋论
middle child conspiracy theories.
是真实得疯狂
Crazy real!
作为家里的老二会不停吃亏
You're constantly boned when you're the middle child.
我只能坐沙发上不好的位置
I get the bad spot on the couch,
吃披萨里最小的那块
the runty piece of pizza,
甚至还要穿你不要的旧衣服
even your crappy hand-me-downs.
才没有
You do not!
老爸逼我穿你的小马睡衣
Dad made me wear your "My Little Pony" overalls
直到我九岁
'til I was nine!
那是因为老爸很抠门
It's 'cause Dad's cheap,
而不是因为你是家里的老二
not 'cause you're the middle child.
也因为很搞笑
Also 'cause it was funny.
是吗
That right?
我等不急搬去大学
Well, I cannot wait to move to college
好让我重生
so I can be born anew
不作为老二自♥由♥地生活
and live free as a non-middle child!
我这个破位置给你
Just take my stupid spot on the couch.
作为家里老二
For a middle child,
得到沙发座位是巨大胜利
getting the couch was an epic triumph,
而接下来发生的事
though what happened next
才是巴瑞的第一次真正胜利
was Barry's first real win.
停止交火所有人注意巴瑞
Stop your cross-fire! Everyone focus on Barry!
看宾州大寄来的厚信封
Look, a thick-ass envelope from Penn.
-宾州大的厚信封 -没错
- Thick from Penn? - You know it.
我要把这信封撕个粉身碎骨
I'm gonna rip the ass out of this envelope.
快撕
Yeah, go. ?
撕个粉身碎骨狠狠撕
Rip out the ass. Rip it but good.
巴瑞做到了
Barry did it!
巴瑞被录取了
Barry got in!
人人都想要巴瑞
Everyone wants Barry!
你被三所大学录取了
That makes three colleges!
但这所是最好的宝贝
But this is the one, baby!
东海岸最好的医学预科课程
Best pre-med program on the East Coast.
-最好的 -去死吧垃圾后备学校
- The best! - ?Screw you, garbage safety schools
伊萨卡和巴克内尔
Ithaca and Bucknell.
你们是垃圾我们不需要你们了
You're garbage. We don't need you now.
我没有信吗
Did I get any mail?
真典型
Classic.
因为我收到了特别好的信
'Cause I just some crazy-good mail,
现在你也想要
now you want some?
这次你不能像对待老二那样对待我
Well, you're not gonna middle child me this time,
因为我要上
'cause I'm going to --
-要上宾州大了 -什么
- Going to Penn! - What?!
杰夫我做到了我被录取了