外星居民（2021）

Resident Alien S01E02

Part 3 March 15, 2021, 9:06 a.m.

Who?
等等我不认识你
Wait a minute, I don't know you from school.
你说得对
You're right.
我是邮局工作人员
I'm a post office man.
我眼神很好我看到了那个外星人
I'm good with my eyes, and I saw that alien,
然后他走了
and he's gone.
如果你是个大人为什么是小孩的声音
If you're a man, why do you have a kid's voice?
三轮车事故
Tricycle accident.
如果你在邮局工作
If you work at the post office,
一张邮票要多少钱
how much does a stamp cost?
-一百美元 -我就知道
- $100. - I knew it!
-你就是他 -一千美元
- You're him! - $1,000.
我知道是你你猜怎么着外星人
I know it's you, and guess what, alien,
你不能杀我
you can't kill me.
我父母知道你盯上我了
My parents know you're after me,
如果我死了他们会知道是你干的
and if I die, they'll know you did it,
而且你很笨
and you're dumb.
邮票一张才30块笨蛋
Stamps are, like, 30 bucks each, stupid.
别叫我笨蛋
Don't call me stupid...
你个小狗屎
you little shit.
狗屎是脏话笨蛋
S-H-I-T is a bad word, stupid.
够了我要杀了他
That's it. I'm going to kill him.
你想怎样
What do you want?
我都不知道婴儿还有笑声开关
I didn't know babies had a laugh button.
你在这啊亲爱的
Oh, there you are, sweetheart.
哈里这是我表妹凯拉
Oh, Harry, this is my cousin, Kayla,
还有可爱的小家伙塞吉
and this cute little guy is Sage.
你好
Hi. How are you?
好的周末见
Okay, I'm gonna see you this weekend.
好的
Okay. Mwah.
再见
Bye.
走吧
Let's go.
杰伊你是不是有什么事
Oh, Jay, didn't you have something
想和万德斯本格医生说
you wanted to say to Dr. Vanderspeigle?
特瑞弗翠丝女士想让我向你道歉
Ms. Twelvetrees wanted me to apologize
我不应该叫你讨厌鬼
for calling you a douchebag.
我也很抱歉
And I apologize
你的胎记像只虫子
that your birthmark looks like a bug.
讨厌鬼
Douchebag.
好很高兴误会都讲清了
Yeah, glad we cleared that up.
好了哈里这是你的临时办公室
Okay, Harry, this is your temporary office.
能请你拿上哈里的东西
Can you please grab Harry's things
帮他在护士办公室安顿好吗
and set him up in the nurse's office?
我不想让别人用山姆的办公室
I don't want anyone in Sam's office.
没问题
Sure.
你还好吗你知道的山姆就这么走了
So how are you, you know, with Sam's death?
-我没事 -好吧
- I'm fine. - Okay.
我像你这么大的时候
When I was your age,
伤心的时候找不到人聊天倾诉
I didn't have anyone I could talk to when I was sad,
所以你要是有需要...
so if you ever need someone...
我说了我没事
I said I'm fine.
好吧
Okay.
你伤心的时候为什么不能聊天
Why couldn't you talk when you were sad?
不是我可以聊天我只是搬出去住了
Oh, no, I could talk. I just moved out.
我和我爸爸关系不太好
My father and I didn't get along very well.
那你为什么又搬回去了
Why did you move back?
我猜我想家了
I guess I missed home.
家
Home.
你知道吗我才意识到
You know what I just realized?
我一点也不了解你
I don't know anything about you.
你是哪里人
Where are you from?
我饿了
I'm hungry.
好吧
Okay.
这种人类形态让我很困惑
This human form is confusing to me.
我经常会感受到内心突如其来的空虚
I am often struck with a sharp emptiness inside me.
我会吃饭但这种空虚感还是挥之不去
I eat food, but the emptiness doesn't go away.
59酒吧
你好啊
Well, hello there.
你是和我一起跳舞的那个女人
Oh, you are the woman that I danced with.
没错你还记得
That's right. You remember.
我叫达茜顺便一提
I'm D'arcy, by the way.
打扰一下我想...
Excuse me, I just wanted--
干什么我们没有无线网
What? We don't have Wi-Fi.
我只是想要张纸巾
I just wanted a napkin.
潮男还想要纸巾
Oh, fancy man wants a napkin.
你貌似就穿着一张纸巾
It looks like you're wearing a napkin,
要不就用那个吧滚远点
so maybe use that. Get out of here.
走开
Go away.
你想来点什么吗
Do you want me to get you anything?
我本来很饿但我现在来到这...
I was hungry, but now that I am here...
不知道为什么就不饿了
for some reason, I'm not.
听起来是压力太大了
Sounds like stress.
我经常因为压力暴饮暴食
I'm a big stress eater.
我前几天吃掉了一整包玉米片
I ate a whole bag of Doritos the other day,
家庭装的
family size.
或许你想来点你最爱的本地威士忌
Maybe you want some of this local whiskey that you love.
不要
No.
不要
No.
上次喝了那个以后我差点杀了个人
Last time I drank that, I tried to kill someone.
真的吗
Really?
那是你第一次杀人
Well, was that your first murder
还是说你经常干这个
or is that something you do a lot?
不是第一次也不会是最后一次
Wasn't the first, won't be the last.
好吧
Okay, wow.
所以你喜欢刺杀还是...
So you, like, a knife guy or...?
我喜欢徒手
I like to use my hands.
我也是只不过不是去杀人
Me too, except not for murder as much.
不过总之如果你想四处谋杀
But, anyway, if you're gonna go around killing people,
至少也要制♥造♥成是意外的样子
you should at least make it look like an accident
因为你要是被抓走
'cause if you get arrested,
明天晚上就没办法带我去打保龄球了
you can't take me bowling tomorrow night.
杀那个小孩麦克斯的时候
When I kill that kid Max,
我可以制♥造♥成是一起意外
I can make it look like an accident.
那样我就不会被抓了
Then I won't get caught.
真是个好主意
That's a great idea.
好不错那这就算约会了
Great, yeah, it's a date.
我还没和谋杀犯一起打过保龄球呢
I've never gone bowling with a murderer before.
一直是我的人生目标
It's been a goal.
保龄球是什么
What is bowling?
我很高兴在家里有丈夫儿子陪伴
I'm glad my husband and son are here with me in my home.
-让我很满足 -我是你丈夫
- Makes me fulfilled. - I am your husband.
-这个饼干真是太棒了 -我也在呢
- This cookie is delightful. - I'm here too.
我是个年轻人
I'm a younger person.
让我来把炉灶打开
Let me turn on the cooking stove.
真有趣我只听到了嘶嘶的声音
It's funny. All I hear is a hissing noise.
我希望空气里不是丙烷的味道
I hope that smell in the air isn't propane gas.
爆♥炸♥是个不错的选择看起来像是意外
Explosion is a good option. It looks like an accident.
所以...
So, uh...
和真正关心你的人聊天感觉真好
You know, it is nice talking to someone who cares.
你知道吗
You know?
我喜欢你做记录这一点
And I love that you're writing things down.
以前山姆从来都不记笔记
You know, Sam, he didn't really ever take notes.
没人像我这么关心别人
Well, no one cares more about people than I do.
对山姆有些不错的建议
Yeah, Sam gave good advice,
但他并没有心理咨♥询♥资格
but he wasn't exactly qualified.
我们镇很幸运
This town is lucky
你是作为临床心理学家开始职业生涯的
you started your career as a clinical psychologist.
我也很幸运非常幸运
Lucky for me too... So lucky.
只是全部这些压力容易让人
It's just all this stress has a bit of a tendency...
累积不良情绪
to just build up.
有时候我幻想着重回童年
Sometimes I think about being a kid again.