壕滑人生（2017）

Loaded S01E03

Part 1 June 28, 2021, 12:39 p.m.

嘿 Casey马上就来了她将要
Hey, Casey will be with you in a moment, she's just...
我还是留点悬念好了
I'd just rather not say what she's doing.
感谢各位的到场关于新游戏
Thanks for coming. New game.
把你们的想法都丢出来 - 是这样的
Pitch me, go. - OK, well,
我们之前想过一个老点子
we had something in the vault, an old idea.
是的一个我们都为之兴奋的点子
Yeah, it's one we're really excited about it.
是个我们一直以来都想做的游戏
It is a game we've always wanted to make.
这是个赛车游戏赛道就是人体
It's a racing game, set inside the human body.
腔体赛车
Cavity Racers.
你扮演一个血细胞 - 或者说是酶
You're a blood cell... - Or an enzyme.
在动脉之中驰骋
And you're racing along the arteries,
或在主肺动脉之中
or the main pulmonary highways,
然后你进入腔体之中
and then you get into the cavities.
能开到膀胱吗
Would you race to the bladder?
哦好主意可以加入扩展包里
Oh, great idea. Could be an expansion pack.
装满尿的膀胱吗 - 有点恶心啊
Bladders full of piss? - It is a bit grim.
给我这个机会试试
Give me a chance to try
我新的实时3D流体颗粒渲染吧
out my real-time 3D fluid and particle rendering.
你都有能渲染写实尿液的物理引擎了吗
You've got a new physics engine that renders realistic piss?
我还真有 - 从大局来看
I really do, yes. - Big picture
这就是个讽刺性质的静脉卡丁车游戏
it's a satirical intravenous cart-style racing game
针对的人体内的法♥西♥斯♥主义
about body fascism.
适用于各年龄的小孩
For kids of all ages.
哇哦我觉得这真是个好主意啊
Wow, guys. I mean, that is a great idea.
听起来也很吸金
And it sounds really commercial.
嗯哼
Uh-huh.
怎么样我的英式反讽
How's it going, my whole British sarcasm thing?
是的你开始上手了
Yes, you are really getting the hang of it.
谢了 Watto 真心谢谢夸奖
Thanks, Watto, I really appreciate that.
我才没又一个反讽而已
I don't really, I was doing it again.
好了让我们回到猫工厂的规划中来
Anyway, we just got back The Cap Factory projections
从三四季度的效绩来看
from the third and fourth quarters,
就跟我高中最好的朋友Tania Devon一样
and like my best friend from high school, tania Devon,
都不怎么漂亮
they are not pretty.
所以我们准备裁个员
So. We're going to be making some cutbacks.
怎么弄 - 我们来审视一下
Like how? - We're going to be looking
工作效率做个全员员工审计
at efficiencies, doing a full personnel audit,
搞清楚每个人到底在公♥司♥做的什么
finding out what everyone in the company does.
好主意因为我们这有个叫小小Barney的家伙
That's a good idea because there's one bloke, Tiny Barney,
我都不知道他是干嘛的 - 小小Barney是谁
I have no idea what he does. - Who's Tiny Barney?
全员也包括你们
Including you guys.
我们我们也要吗
Us? We have to do it, too?
你的意思是我们还得重新应聘我们的工作
You mean we've got to reapply for our own jobs?
Naomi会带你们走一遍流程的就跟填个表一样
Naomi will walk you through it. It is a form you fill out.
真的只是行政流程
Really. It's just admin.
好了我得去别的地方了
OK, I've got somewhere to be.
虽然我都不知道是哪 Naomi
No idea where. Naomi!
"行政流程而已真的行政流程"
"It's just admin, really. It's just admin."
毛主席引发大饥荒时也是这么说的
Said Chairman Mao as he released the great famine.
我现在有点兴奋
Now, I'm quite excited
因为我很喜欢提问
about this because I love asking questions,
所以如果问的问题过火了请直接提出来
so if there's anything that crosses the line, just say.
抱歉我有点紧张
Sorry, a bit anxious,
看我指甲的状态就知道了
look at the state of those nails.
职位名
Job title?
官方点讲我的职位是吵吵程序猿
Officially, I am the code wrangling monkey boy.
事实上我的名片上也是这么写的
I've got it on my card, actually.
Leon为了搞个笑印的
Leon had these printed up for a bit of a joke.
第一个问题 Leon 轻松加写意你是做什么的
First question, Leon, nice and easy, what do you do?
什么意思 - 显然我知道你是做什么的
How do you mean? - Obviously, I know what you do.
是挺明显的但对于那些不了解的人来说呢
It is obvious, but if it was not obvious,
你会跟他们怎么说 - 业拓
what would you say it is? - Bus Dev.
业务拓展更重要的活是
Business development, more crucially
掌握大局观
had a vision.
我是掌局者 Josh负责处理细节
I'm the big picture guy, Josh is details.
如果迷失在沙漠中的话我这类人会说
Lost in the desert, I am like,
"我们来钻油井吧挣他个10亿的"
'Let's drill for oil, make $1 billion dollars.'
Josh的话就是 "大伙野餐要进沙子了"
And Josh is like, 'Guys, there's sand in the picnic.'
主设计师谋士创意之源
Lead designer, ideas man, head of creative.
我是让一切走上正轨的人
I'm the guy who keeps the train on the tracks.
没有我一切都无法运转
Without me, the wheels would fall off,
Watto还会把自己胡子点着
and Watto sets his beard on fire.
二者都是真实发生过的例子
Both of which are examples of things that have actually happened.
方圆之内的艺术家/办公室怪人/人形图腾
Artist in resident/office weirdo/human totem.
我是这儿的精神支柱
I'm the spirit of the place.
火种的掌管者 - 但你也写代码啊
Keeper of the flame. - But you do coding
死板的0啊1的 - 我不用做那个的不是我的本职
also? The old ones and zeros. - I don't need to, not my thing.
就像 Captain Birdseye真是个水手吗我可不清楚
It's like, is Captain Birdseye an actual sailor? I don't know,
但他做的炸鱼条真♥他♥妈♥的好吃
but he makes great fucking fish fingers.
所以是你在想点子是吗
So you come up with the ideas?
不 Josh负责点子不过那是很简单的部分
No, Josh is ideas, but that's the easy hit.
概述一下你在公♥司♥中的位置
How would you summarise your position within the company?
我就是大脑
I'm the brains.
大脑就是我 - 如果Leon也这么说
I'm the brains. - And if Leon answers otherwise,
他就是个骗子 - 他说你是打点细节的
he's a liar. - He said you are the details guy,
还说了些关于野餐的听不懂的话
and then something confusing about picnics.
他这么说吗
He said that?
Josh说他是大脑 - 好啊那我就是脸
Josh says that he's the brains. - Fine, I'm the face.
显然大脑控制着脸啊
Obviously, the brain controls the face.
不不不大脑可控制不了这张脸
No, no, not to this face,
我这脸是和大脑断开连接的
this face is disconnected from the brain,
我这脸可不是大脑让做啥就做啥
this face does not always do what the brain tells it to.
就像得了贝尔氏面瘫一样吗我奶奶就是
Like you have Bell's palsy? Like my Nan,
眼皮都是这样的呃 - 有点吧
with the eyelid, ugh. - I mean, kind of.
我是后背不是脊柱哈
I'm the back. Not the backbone,
我只是背部的肌肉
I'm just the flesh on the back.
从正面看都看不到但我一直都在
Can't see me from the front, but I'm always there,
就是一堆值得信赖的
just a giant dependable mound of...
背部肌肉
of back flesh.
其实更像是个流动的角色
It's more of a floating role, really.
比起雇员
I'm less of an employee
我更像是渗透这个空间的气体
and more like a gas that permeates the space,
更像是辐射
like radiation.
我确实是在做些
I definitely do something that
你们都看不到的事的
you can't see what it is that I do.
只不过我的工作不像辐射一样致癌
Except, I don't give people cancer. I don't do that.
业务拓展我所做的就是拓展业务
Business development. I develop the business.
叮叮叮抱歉我们的时间到了
Ding, ding, ding! Sorry, but that's all we've got time for,
感谢你的参与 Leon
thanks so much for playing, Leon.
不逗了还是谢谢你
No, but seriously, thanks.
我也干这个
I also do this.
噢
Aw.
喜欢的话可以留着 - 谢谢
You can keep that if you like. - Thanks.
我很喜欢你为办公室做的一切
And I really love what you've done to the office.
最后一个问题有趣一点的在文学作品中最喜欢的巫师是
Last one, bit of fun, favourite wizard in literature?
<碟形世界>中的Ponder Stibbons
Ponder Stibbons from the Discworld universe.
抱歉你说的是谁
Sorry, who?
<碟形世界>中的Ponder Stibbons啊
Ponder Stibbons from the Discworld universe.
不好意思但你为什么要问这个
I'm sorry, why would you need to know that?
别想多了是我就会选个甘道夫
Don't worry, I'll just put Gandalf.
别别用那个做答案太浅显了
No, don't put that, it's too obvious.
让我想想
Give me a minute.
不好意思快轮到下一个人了 - 就一下
Sorry, I have other people coming in. - Just give me a second.
普洛斯彼罗
Prospero.
好吧
Yeah,
用这个 - 好嘛
put that. - Yep.
嗨老爸也门怎么样
Hi, Dad. How's the Yemen?
等等什么什么意思
Wait, what? What do you mean?
我老爸刚打电♥话♥过来
That was my dad on the phone,
他们要提前两个月结束假期
they are back from holiday two months early.