壕滑人生（2017）

Loaded S01E02

Part 3 June 28, 2021, 12:39 p.m.

你们可以留着这些康加鼓
You can keep the congas.
实际上 - 好吧我带走总行了吧
Actually... - Fine! I'll take the congas!
天啊你住的能离直升机坪更远一点吗
Jesus Christ, could you live any further away from a helipad?
Leon
Leon.
Harper
Harper.
九年级的时候 - 你想干嘛
Year Nine. - What do you want?
我来做演讲啊小婊砸
I'm here to do an assembly, motherfucker.
那么本来想让你再猜猜的你还记得那会儿
So, no spoilers, but do you remember when you
你说我又懒又不专注吗
said I was lazy and lacked focus?
记不太清了但肯定是说过的
Not specifically, but, sure.
好这事现在有了点后文
Well, there's been a bit of an update on that front.
给你个提示吧跟"急僧鸡"押韵的一个词
I'll give you a clue. It rhymes with pelicopter.
那么有学位的举个手
So, hands up who has a degree.
很好拥有直升机的举个手
Good. Hands up who has a helicopter.
是我我有
Me. I do.
阿古斯塔的AW109 E款
Augusta AW109 E,
闪银色加红色条纹
metallic silver with the red stripe.
白色真皮内饰宽敞的空间
White leather interior, ample legroom.
你还好吧
Are you all right?
这么说吧
Put it this way.
有癌症的请举手
Hands up who has cancer.
我我有
Me. I do.
真的吗是
Really, like...?
哪种 - 你知道好的那种吗
Which one? - You know the good one?
长鸡鸡上让它变得巨大的那种
The one that gives you a giant dick?
我得的恰好是另一种
I have the other one.
那么请继续
But, please...
跟我把你的直升机好好说说吧
Tell me all about your helicopter.
洗耳恭听
I'm all ears.
她不能要求我们做个续集对吧
She can't make us do a sequel, can she?
一旦你完善了垂直下落的老鼠的物理模型之后
Once you've perfected the physics modelling of a plummeting mouse,
而我已经把这事做好了
and I have,
再要做一遍的话那就真的是惨无人道了
it does become a bit of an existential grind.
Ewan 我需要你现在去同步一下操控部分麻烦了
Ewan, I need you to sync the control version right now, if you please.
再来一遍喽从同步操控开始
Here we go again, syncing the control versions.
这是我的发泄口啊你明白的我的音乐
This is my one outlet, you know. My music.
你应该试试挤压减压法非常之畅快
You should try squash, it's very cathartic.
Watto 如果你想加入个乐队的话买♥♥一个就好了
Watto, if you want a band, just buy one.
买♥♥个乐队
Buy a band?
他说的没错
He's right,
你可能买♥♥不了Coldplay或者Counting Crows这种乐队
you probably couldn't buy Coldplay or the Counting Crows,
但Weezer乐队
but... Weezer,
Weezer这种我担♥保♥你买♥♥得起
I bet you could buy yourself Weezer.
炒掉鼓手接管他的位置
Sack the drummer, take over.
这还真是个实用而有趣的主意
That is actually a seriously hard-core, intriguing idea.
找到了
There he is.
Greg 他是Abi的新男友 - 哎呀
Greg. Abi's new boyfriend. - Crikey.
他骑遍了整个加拿大 - 是的千真万确
He cycled the whole of Canada! - Yeah, exactly.
什么样的屌♥人会干这事
What kind of wanker does that?
哦真正的慈善家就会有牛逼的自行车的那种
Oh, a really charitable one, with a great bike and...
还有双醉人的眼睛 - 好勒向Gregory先生脱帽致敬
... really quite soft eyes. - Well, much doffing of caps to Sir Gregory.
别脱了跟他脱什么鬼帽子啊 Ewan - 抱歉没想那么多
Don't doff! Don't doff to him, Ewan. - Sorry, didn't think.
不是听着我没嫉妒好吧我一点也不嫉妒他
No, look, I'm not jealous, all right? I'm not jealous.
而且你说的很多他确实很棒棒干得漂亮 Greg
And you're right, good on him. Well done, Greg.
看吧根本没有伤到我的心
You know, just to show there's no hard feelings.
6万磅
60 grand.
搞定
Done.
对的让他看看
Yeah, that will show him...
他睡了你还爱着的女人这件事根本没伤着你
For having sex with the girl you're still in love with.
哦 Josh 我在这边的时候
Oh, Josh, while I'm here.
我要暂时征用一下你的办公室
I'm going to be temporarily commandeering your office.
好的你这么做好吗 - 不知道啊你能阻止我吗
Right, can you do that? - I don't know, can you stop me?
呃不清楚感觉不能
Er, I'm not sure. I don't think so.
好吧我看也是这东西放这边
Well, then, looks like it. This goes in here.
Ewan 你这会儿在干嘛
Ewan, what are you doing right now?
我吗哦哦
Me? Oh, oh.
没干嘛 - 太好了
Nothing much. - Great.
那你就可以去帮Naomi布置好我的办公室了
Then you can help Naomi get my office all set up.
呃 Ewan 你不是该去同步好操控系统吗
Er, Ewan, weren't you supposed to synchronise the control version?
他说的对我确实有事要忙
He's right, I am doing something, actually.
那你刚干嘛说你没有 - 不知道
Then why did you say you weren't? - No idea.
我觉得只是条件反射
I think it's just a reflex.
"你在干嘛" "哦没事"
'What you doing?' 'Oh, nothing.'
就是不想显得太张扬就像是
Think I don't want to seem too braggy, like,
"哦看看我我多忙啊"
'Oh, get me, I'm so busy.'
妈了个休·格兰特的鸡 - 什么
Bedwetting Hugh Grant fuck. - Say again?
哦没没什么就这样吧 Bewan
Oh, no, no, nothing, it's fine, Bewan.
唔
Hmm.
感觉我在新领导面前
Doesn't feel like I'm making the greatest
没留下太好的第一印象啊
of first impressions on the new boss.
但幸好
But thankfully,
脑海中不同意的声音还是成功反驳了我这个想法
the chorus of dissenting voices has convinced me otherwise!
Bewan牛逼
Hooray for Bewan.
呃那至于飞行时间的话
Erm, well, in terms of flying times,
一个半小时之内就能飞到康沃尔
you can go to Cornwall in an hour 30.
这些钱你拿来干嘛的
Why have you got the money?
哦呃
Oh, erm...
演讲到最后我会拿出这5万现钞
At the end, I was going to take out 50 grand in cash.
拿出来干嘛
What are you going to do with it?
拿来
I was going to...
可能会拿来扇你的脸
Like, flop it around in your face.
那来吧 - 我不能这么做
Go on, then? - I can't do that.
你在可怜我吗小伙子
Are you taking pity on me, son?
不我只是做不到拿5万磅扇一个可怜人的脸
No, I'm just not flopping 50 grand in a poorly man's face.
来吧做个硬汉扇来看看吧
Come on, big man. Let's see it.
还是说你没这个胆你还是专注不下来吗
Or do you not have the bottle? Do you not have the focus?
那好吧
All right, OK.
来啊扇我
Come on, flop it around!
不是那么扇的我要的是耳光
Not like that. I want to feel it on my cheeks.
真下作啊
Disgusting.
拿票子扇一个将死之人的脸
Waving your cash in a dying man's face.
好吧算了吧 - 我开玩笑的啊天啊
You know what? Forget it. - I was kidding! Jesus.
就当把这中彩票换来的钱用在培养幽默感上嘛
Maybe spend some of that lottery money on a sense of humour.
我没中彩票好吧我挣来的我应得的
I didn't win the lottery, OK? I earned this, I deserve it.
哦是吗 - 你觉得我不配挣这些钱
Oh, is that right? - Well, you don't think I deserve it?
我可不清楚小伙子
I have no idea, son.
基于今天来说可能确实这么觉得
On the evidence of today, probably not.
哦好啊你跟我来
Well, that's it, you're coming with me.
我给你展示下我所成就的再备好下直升机
I'll show you what I've done. Re-scramble the chopper.
来吧
Come on!
这
This...
即是我所成之事
This is what I made.
这些人都在做你的撸猫游戏吗
And all these people are working on your little cat flaps game?
不是撸猫老兄工厂猫工厂
It's not about cat flaps, mate. Factory, Cat Factory.
获了奖的
Awards.
还有人为做猫游戏的设立奖项的吗
They have awards for people who make cat games?
我是说我最惊讶的是居然能挣这么多钱
I mean, what's so impressive to me is you can make
就靠做个这么无意冒犯
so much money out of something so... no offence...
陈腐的东西
Banal.
因为没有不敬的意思这可算不上索尔兹伯里大教堂
Because, no disrespect, it's hardly Salisbury Cathedral.
去他妈的索尔兹伯里大教堂
Fuck Salisbury Cathedral!
我都能买♥♥下那个教堂了
I could buy Salisbury Cathedral like that.
好吧小伙子
OK, son.
你可买♥♥不下索尔兹伯里大教堂
You couldn't buy Salisbury Cathedral.
你以为我买♥♥不下索尔兹伯里大教堂
You don't think I could buy Salisbury Cathedral?
是的买♥♥不下
No, I don't.
行我们就来看看买♥♥不买♥♥的下
OK, we'll see who can and can't buy Salisbury Cathedral.
看看就看看 - 好啊
Yes, we will. - All right, fine.
我现在就打给国民信托
I'll call the National Trust right now.
Josh
Josh!