含笑台上（2017）

I'm Dying Up Here S01E01

Part 8 May 7, 2021, 2:45 p.m.

You were friends with Clay?
是啊他他...
Yeah, he--he, uh,
有一次在我演出后给我买♥♥过披萨
bought me a slice of pizza after one of my sets.
所以你们有披萨情缘了
Oh, so you got the pizza connection?
恭喜了真是酷啊
Wow, congrats. That's really cool.
滚吧小子
Screw, kid.
我的天啊你在这里呢
Oh, my God! There you are.
-你看起来真不错 -我看起来怎样
- You look fabulous. - How do I look?
这小子不认识科雷他就是来蹭的
This kid doesn't know Clay. He's just here hustling.
如果你认为科雷会在意那你也不认识他
Neither do you if you think Clay would give a shit.
他是我的客人来吧
He's my guest. Come on.
你穿得就像是弗利普·威尔逊去了西尔斯百货
You look like Flip Wilson went to Sears.
-谢了老兄 -别客气
- Hey, thanks, man. - Man, forget it.
干这行只有一条准则
There's only one rule in this business,
但目前为止还没人搞明白
and so far nobody's figured out what it is yet.
欢迎来到狂野西部
Welcome to the wild, wild west.
去尝尝鸡蛋沙拉吧
Hey, enjoy the egg salad.
聪明大学文凭
Smart, college educated.
贝蒂呢我听说她会带"海鲜"来
Uh, where's Betty? I heard she's bringing seafood.
快闭嘴啦
Shut the fuck up.
她去找她妈挑新婴儿车去了
She's meeting her mother to pick out a new crib.
晚点会过来多谢关心
She's gonna come by a little later, thank you.
她内♥裤♥里那些小水虎鱼呢
What about all the little piranhas in her panties?
我跟她说我把他们都搞定了
I, uh, told her I got them at the Y.
严格来说的确是这样
Well, I mean, technically, you did.
你真该听听我当时是怎么说的
Man, you should have heard me.
我今天早上打电♥话♥骂了他们一顿
I'm blasting them on the phone this morning.
我说"你们这群人我老婆都怀孕了
I'm like, "You guys, my wife is pregnant;
"她可能都已经有了我要把
and she probably has them; and I'm gonna take
"青年基♥督♥教协会告上法庭"
the Young Man's Christian Association to court!"
我还用了全称来吓唬他们
I used the full name to intimidate them.
很管用的
It really worked well.
她就这么信了
And she bought all that?
是啊丝毫没有怀疑
Yeah. Hook, line, and sinker.
我甚至把会员都注销了
I even canceled my membership,
真是不爽我喜欢在这里工作
which sucks, 'cause I loved working out there.
这里又不贵而且老实说
It's inexpensive and, truth be told,
还很干净
it's very, very clean.
那些姑娘可坏了
I mean, these girls were bad, you know, so...
但科雷介绍了我们认识
But Clay, he introduces us.
她们就问我跟他是怎么认识的
And the--and the girls ask how we know each other.
科雷一脸正经地看着她们说
Clay looks at them with a straight face and says,
"我们是被强♥奸♥生出来的堂兄弟"
"We're cousins through rape."
接着呢
And then--and then,
接着他讲了个故事
and then he goes on to tell a story,
一段关于摩尔人为什么是黑人的历史
a history lesson about how the Moors were black
他们是如何入侵掠夺了西西里岛还强♥奸♥了岛上的人
and they invaded, raped, and pillaged Sicily.
但现在我们是一个幸福的大家庭了
But we are all one, big happy family now,
那都是过去的事了
it's all in the past.
那天晚上没一个女人愿意跟我们上♥床♥
Man, neither one of us got laid that night.
科雷是我的好兄弟真的
Clay was my man, I tell you that.
他是我的好兄弟
He was my man.
谢谢你
Thank you.
大家好
Hello, um,
我知道你们都没听说过我们
I know, uh, none of you know us,
我和我的朋友罗恩
me and my friend Ron. Um.
但我跟科雷在波士顿的时候
But, uh, I knew Clay from
就认识了那时候他还叫卡洛杰罗
back in Boston when his first name was still Calogero.
我们那时还小在罗梅洛店里做披萨
We were kids making pizzas at Romero's,
一家正宗的意大利餐馆
which was an authentic Italian restaurant
是我的犹太叔叔开的
that was owned by my Jewish uncle.
后来科雷在"丝♥袜♥熟♥女♥"找了份工作
Later, Clay got a job at, uh, Combat Zone,
在一家脱衣舞俱乐部说单口相声
doing comedy at a strip club.
我开车到波士顿去看他表演
And I'd drive into Boston and watch, and, uh...
我可能是那家店里唯一一个
...I mean, I was probably the one guy there
看科雷表演而不是看脱衣舞♥女♥的人
not to watch the strippers but to watch Clay perform.
他在台上说着笑话
And he'd be up there telling these jokes about,
关于他的家人还有在小镇的成长经历
about his family and growing up in a small town,
但那些其实...
but, you know, they-- they weren't--
其实并不是笑话而是...
they weren't jokes, they were these...
而是他自己的一些小秘密
...I don't know, these secrets about himself.
有一天俱乐部打烊后
And, uh, one night after closing,
我们去酒吧喝酒
we, uh, went to the bar for a beer.
我问他是怎么
And, uh, I asked him how does he
在一群醉鬼面前
get up in front of all these drunks
逗他们发笑
and, uh, make them laugh
还是用他自己
at the most
生活中最尴尬最丢脸
embarrassing, shameful,
最痛苦的经历作为笑料
painful moments of his life.
然后...
And, uh...
他说对他来说
...he said it was easier for him
在一群醉醺醺的陌生人面前
to confess the truth about himself
向他们坦白自己的糗事
to a room full of drunken strangers
比面对他爱的人要容易得多
than it was to the people he really loved.
他是个好人
He was beautiful.
安吉莉娜
Angelina.
-盖伊 -我们走吧
- Oh, Guy. - We're leaving.
你得留下来卡洛杰罗的那些事...
You have to stay in here. The stories about Calogero...
我们走
We're leaving.
阿普佐先生别这样
Mr. Appuzzo, please,
不跟我们一起坐坐吗
won't you join us, just a little while?
请坐吧请坐
Have--have a seat, please.
这...
The...
我儿子死了
My son is dead.
他还是个孩子
He was a child.
他一直都只是个孩子
He was always a child.
你们也是
You are children.
你们以为什么事都能拿来开玩笑
You think you can joke your way out of everything,
无论是痛苦心痛还是人生
pain, heartache, life!
那就开吧然后呢
Go ahead. Then what?
现实还是在等待着你们
It's all still there waiting for you,
等待着你们去解决
waiting to be dealt with.
你们都是闭着眼的孩子
You're children with your eyes closed,
以为没人会看到你们
thinking nobody can see you.
我看到了
I see you.
我看透了你们每一个人
I see right through all of you.
该死
Oh, shit!
亲爱的你在做什么医生说
Honey, what are you doing? The doctor said
生下孩子前不能破坏财物
no destruction of property until after the baby!
这是你买♥♥去虱膏的收据
It's the receipt from your crab lotion.
如果你是早上才知道的
If you found out about it this morning,
为什么收据是两天前的你个混♥蛋♥
then why is the receipt from two days ago, you son of a bitch?
别砸我的车
No, not on my car!
贝丝过来把棍子给我
Bess, come here, give me that--
能不能...不不不过来过来
Can we--no-no-no-no, please, come here, come-here,
过来别砸了
come here, stop, come on!
我还以为我已经没有阴虱了
Thought I got rid of those.
我都让你管好你的下半身了
Told you to keep your dick in your skirt, didn't I?
我能去喝杯酒吗
Mind if I grab a beer?
一起吧
I'll join you.
嗨戈尔迪你好吗
Hey, hey, Goldie. How you doing?
我是亚当亚当·普鲁托
I'm, uh, I'm Adam. Adam Proteau.
我知道你是谁
Yeah, I know who you are.
我知道现在不是说这个的好时机但是我...
Um, yeah, I know now is a bad time, but I was--
我说了我知道你是谁
I said I know who you are.
不如趁着最好的时候退出江湖吧
Why don't you quit while you're ahead, huh?
?If you can't be my master?
?I will do anything?
?There's nothing left alive?
?But a pair of glassy eyes?
?Raise my feelings one more time?
请进
Come in.
亲爱的你看起来很累
Oh, sweetie. Hey, you look tired.