含笑台上（2017）

I'm Dying Up Here S01E01

Part 5 May 7, 2021, 2:45 p.m.

凯茜
那不勒斯
?And why don't you follow?
什么样的神会做出那样的事
What kind of God does something like that?
拼命努力在《今夜秀》上嗨翻了全场
You work your ass off; you kill on The Tonight Show;
坐上了沙发
you get the fucking couch;
却在一个晚上被巴士给撞了
that very night, you're hit by a bus?
你兄弟是闯红灯的时候被车撞的
Your buddy got hit crossing against a green.
那可不是神干的那是进化论或者是百威[啤酒]的错
That's not God, that's Darwin or Budweiser.
你有时候真是嘴贱
Well, you're a real cunt sometimes.
"有时候"真是对我的侮辱
Hey, I find the word "sometimes" offensive.
打扰一下
Excuse me?
想上台表演应该找谁
Who do we talk to about stage time?
业余演员安排在周二晚上伙计们
Amateur night's Tuesday night, guys.
报名表在柜台边上
Sign-up sheet's by the register.
不不不
No, no, no, no, no, uh...
我们不做开麦夜我们是专业的
We--we don't do open mic. We're pros.
理查德·普莱尔周四晚上表演
I got, uh, Richard Pryor's going on Thursday night.
我可以把他拿下来
I can, uh, bump him if it means
好安排"专业"演员上台表演
that I can get some pros on stage.
他不是这个意思
Look, he didn't mean anything, okay?
我们之前在波士顿表演喜剧
We're working comics from Boston
来这边找一个朋友
and we came out to stay with a friend
他本该把我们安排在这里的
and he was gonna set us up out here,
但不幸的是
but unfortunately, he...
他昨晚过世了
he died last night, so...
科雷
科雷·阿普佐没错
Clay Appuzzo, yeah.
所以我们没地方落脚
Anyway, we got nowhere to crash,
光是来这里就花光了所有钱
and we spent everything just to get out here.
你能不能帮个忙安排我们上台表演
So if you could help us out and give us some stage time?
所以你俩像《罗恩马丁秀》一样咯
What, are you guys like a Rowan and Martin?
不我们分开表演的
No, separate acts.
好吧
Well,
我只能把你们安排在业余演员之夜
amateur night's the best I can do for you guys.
没有戈尔迪的同意你们就不能上主舞台表演
Can't play The Main Room without Goldie's blessing
哪怕是开麦夜也要等个三周
and even open mics are like a three-week wait.
操你奶奶个腿儿
Fuck, fucking suck a duck.
操♥他♥妈♥的
Fuck duck!
操操操操
Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
操
Fuck!
操
Fuck!
他是智障吗
He retarded?
大兄弟
Listen, man, um,
你...
if...
你能不能稍微帮帮我们
if there's anything you could do to help us out?
如果你俩在成名之前需要住处的话
Well, if you guys need a place to stay until you make it big,
我可以安排一下
I can set you up with something.
多丽你能不能把我很久以前
Hey, Dory, you think you could get that ketchup
点的番茄酱给我
that I asked for a long time ago, you know,
那时候你还没拿到社保号♥码
before your Social Security kicks in?
拿最好的拿最好的
The nicest. The nicest.
"那不勒斯"
"Fa Napoli."
下次直接寄来就行了
Next time just mail it.
这是明信片又不是电报
It's a postcard, not a telegram.
我觉得这是科雷的自杀遗书
I think it's a suicide note from Clay.
这怎么就是自杀遗书了
How is this a suicide note?
这是引用了歌♥德的话 "那不勒斯"
It's part of a Goethe quote. "Fa Napoli."
"见到那不勒斯死而无憾"
"See Naples and die."
科雷以前总挂在嘴边
Clay used to say it all the time.
意思就是一旦你见到了那不勒斯
It meant once you see Naples,
你什么都不会想做只想死
there was nothing left to do but die
因为没有什么能比得上那一瞬间
because nothing would ever compare to that moment.
这只是张明信片凯茜
It's a postcard, Cass.
他把它留在了日落塔酒店的床头柜上
That he left on the bedside table at the Sunset Tower Hotel.
他为什么要住酒店
Why was he even staying at a hotel
他家离那里只有两个街区远
when he lives two blocks away?
我不知道
I don't know.
你想玩推理可以
Look, you want to play Mod Squad, fine,
但你去找别人扯淡吧
but pull this shit with someone else.
扯什么淡
Pull what shit?
扯你给一个白上了你两年的家伙
The shit where you build a fucking shrine to a guy
造了圣坛的淡
who wiped his feet on your ass for two years.
我是以朋友的身份来的
I came here as a friend.
我懂
I understand.
科雷死了真♥他♥妈♥是个悲剧
Clay died. It's a fucking tragedy.
我明白
I get it.
是这种修正主义论的瞎掰
It's this fond revisionist bullshit
让我想吐
that makes me want to puke.
也会让科雷想吐的你知道吗
It'd make Clay puke too. And you know what?
你只是想坐在那儿把他做的丑事
You just want to sit there and sweep all his dick-ish qualities
都掩盖起来并奇迹般地
under the rug and--and magically turn the silent asshole
把他最后的名声书写成
at the end of his name into a
"再也不会有像他一样的人了"
"There'll never be another like him,"
那你就去做啊但你要想重写历史
then go for it, but you're gonna have to rewrite history
麻烦去找其他傻屌♥
with some other shithead.
去你♥妈♥的♥ 比尔
Go fuck yourself, Bill.
是他甩的你凯茜
He dumped you, Cass.
而我在这里我他妈的就在这里
I'm right here. I'm right fucking here!
他说得有道理
He makes a good point.
?It's your thing?
?Do what you want to do...?
这他妈就是胡扯米奇
That is fucking bullshit, Mitch.
?I can't tell you?
约翰尼喜欢你那小子
Johnny liked your boy.
-还让他坐上了沙发 -是啊
- Gave him the fucking couch. - Yeah.
可他却去撞巴士
Now this thing with the bus?
他可能是嗑药了
Drugs, possibly?
所以现在是谣言说什么就是什么了吗
So rumors are the rule of the day now?
他出去庆祝喝得有点醉
He went out to celebrate, got a little drunk,
跌倒在巴士前面了
fell in front of a bus.
卡森让他坐上了沙发
It--Carson gave him the couch.
谁会错过这个机会啊
Who wouldn't tie one on?
现场的人说他看到巴士了
People there say he saw the bus,
可他却径直走到了车前
walked right out in front of it.
警♥察♥还在调查
Police are still investigating.
所以约翰尼他妈的是准备惩罚我
Wha--so Johnny's fucking punishing me now?
是该死的赞助商
It's the fucking sponsors.
如果真要惩罚谁那一定是我们
If anyone's being punished, it's us.
听着约翰尼也很难过
Okay, look, Johnny feels bad.
但我觉得我们这段时间
But I just think we need to
需要再找一些已有名气的喜剧演员来表演
book some more established comics for a little while,
看看效果如何
see how it all shakes out.
"已有名气"
"Established"?
你准备帮红骷髅改头换面
What, are you gonna dry-clean Red Skeleton,
让他上台表演那我可真是祝你好运了
send him out there? Good fucking luck!
"这段时间"是多久
How long we talking?
大概四五个月
We're thinking four, five months.
到时我再让他们重新登台表演
Then I'll bring the kids right back in.
你想要整改随你的便
You want retreads? Be my guest.
"梅尔夫" "午夜特♥供♥"
Merv, Midnight Special,
他们可以试试我手下这些孩子
they can have first shot at my kids.
我的经纪人和制♥作♥人每晚都驻扎在这里
I got agents and producers packing this place every night,
因为要想等他们能够稳定发挥
because if you're waiting for them to act stable,
那你♥他♥妈♥的就等吧
you got a long fuckin' wait.
他们有的缺乏母爱有的缺乏父爱
I mean, they got mommy issues; they got daddy issues;
他们的稳定期就跟中东的停火协议似的
they're about as stable as a Middle East cease-fire.
那种反复无常那种痛苦
That volatility, that pain,
那种一小时前才在约翰尼·卡森的节目上
that willingness to walk out in front of a bus
博得满堂彩结果却甘愿被车撞死的心...
an hour after killing it on Johnny Carson--
-如果他真是自杀 -他就是那么做的
- if that's what he did-- - That's exactly what he--
这就是才华横溢的代价吧
Well, that's the price of fucking brilliance, isn't it?
正是这让你的数百万观众
That's what makes millions of your viewers
为了看到他们的表演