熟女镇（2009）

Cougar Town S05E13

Part 2 Dec. 8, 2020, 10:54 p.m.

Part-time co-host of "Entertainment tonight,"
兼♥职♥《今晚娱乐》主持人
And on-again, off-again girlfriend of Ricardo Montalban.
里卡多·蒙特尔班分分合合的绯闻女友
Wait. That's it!
等等我就要这个
You and Trav can come in,
你和小崔一起来
pretend to be a rich couple who wants to invest with me!
假装是给我投资的土豪夫妇
Come on. Who's gonna believe us as rich?
算了吧谁会相信我俩很有钱
Because of the internet, most of today's millionaires
因为网络的出现如今很多富翁
are snot-nosed punks, just like you!
都好像是乳臭未干就你这个样子的
What do you say, babe?
宝贝你怎么看
Will you marry me and my millions of dollars?
你愿意嫁给我和我的巨额存款吗
Oh, Travis, yes!
崔维斯愿意
Yes, a thousand times yes!
我愿意百分之百
My career's hit bottom.
我的事业无下限了
I'm so glad my physical's done.
真开心身体♥检♥查完事了
Being healthy was rough.
保持健康太费劲了
You mean putting on gym clothes and eating half a salad?
你是说穿运动服和吃一半的沙拉吗
Yeah! It was terrible!
是啊太可怕了
Mm, there's my doc now.
我医生来电♥话♥了
What's up, doc?
医生什么事
I got the test results from your physical,
你的检查结果出来了
and everything looks good.
一切看起来还不错
No surprise there! I'm a total health nut.
毋庸置疑我身体好着呢
Uh, there is one thing, however,
只是有一个问题
And, uh, I was a little surprised to see it,
结果让我觉得很惊讶
so I re-tested and, uh, got the same result.
所以我重新化验了一下结果还是如此
Uh, thank you.
谢谢你
What is it? Is everything okay?
怎么了一切正常吗
I'm pregnant.
我怀孕了
You're not pregnant.
你没有怀孕
He wasn't testing your sample, remember?
他化验的不是你的尿样记得吗
Oh, my god! Wow.
我的天
That is such a relief!
真是吓我一跳啊
But...
但是
Laurie's pregnant!
是劳里怀孕了
Okay. Let's break this down.
好吧咱们分♥析♥一下
Laurie's pregnant.
劳里怀孕了
Trav knocked her up.
小崔播的种子
She's pregnant with Trav's child.
她怀的是小崔的孩子
Well, assuming it's his.
如果是他的话
Which, obviously, it is.
当然是他的
I mean, Laurie is a very classy girl.
我是说劳里是个很有品位的姑娘
Hold on to your honks, ladies.
先别说了女士们
We got big news.
我们有一个惊天大新闻
Bobby and I just -- get this --
我和鲍比听好了哦
Challenged a bunch of kids to a break-dance contest!
要和一帮孩子比试霹雳舞
But g-man here's teaching me.
但是小格要先教我
he was a member of a real, live breaking crew.
他曾经可真玩过霹雳舞
He -- he taught me how to robot.
他可教过我怎么扮机器人
Laurie and Travis are pregnant.
劳里有了小崔的孩子
You two look like a couple of asses right now.
你们俩现在看起来倒真像是一对傻帽
Whoa, Jules, you sure?
茱尔斯你确定吗
Yes. I had a container of Laurie's pee.
我有一罐劳里的尿液
That's not the point. Yes, I'm sure.
这不重要总之我确定
And Trav and Laurie have no idea,
小崔和劳里根本不知道这件事
and I have no idea how to tell them.
我也不知道怎么和他们说
We have to keep this quiet until I can tell them,
在我告诉他们之前你们谁都不许说
so only the four of us can know.
这件事只有咱们四个人知道
Tom?
汤姆
I can keep a secret.
我会保守秘密的
Thanks again for doing this.
再次感谢你们
I really need to convince my boss
我必须得让我老板相信
that I can bring in some big-time clients.
我带来了大客户
Let's talk about your characters.
咱们来说说你们的人物设定
In order for this to work,
为了确保一切顺利
you must believe you are these people.
你们必须相信自己是这两个人
Laurie, what's your name?
劳里你叫什么名字
I-I don't -- I just got this.
我不知道我才拿到这文件
That's no excuse! What's your name?
别找借口你叫什么名字
Brittany Huffington.
布兰妮·赫芬顿
From?
从哪里来
Toronto.
多伦多
Former?
曾经是什么
Beauty queen.
选美小姐
And? Weather girl.
还有天气预报女郎
Now?
现在干什么
Enjoys breeding yorkies and being a trophy wife.
养狗和亿万富翁的妻子
Travis. I am Tavis Crob.
崔维斯我叫塔维斯·克罗布
From? Florida.
从哪来佛罗里达
Spent all your time on hers, huh?
光顾着设计她的任务了是吗
Made millions from an iPhone app called Pancake Party?
卖♥♥一个叫薄饼派对的苹果应用程序发了家
What is that?
那是什么
I don't know, but the kids can't stop buying it.
我也不知道就知道孩子们都买♥♥
Well, that's good, 'cause it looks like
好吧因为这看起来
my wife could use a new pony!
能给我妻子买♥♥匹新马了
Oh, Tavis, you're so good to me.
塔维斯你对我太好了
Could you give me a moment alone with my wife? Thanks.
能让我和我妻子单独待一会儿吗谢了
Is this good news, or is it bad news?
这是好消息还是坏消息
How are they gonna take this? I have no idea!
他们会怎么看这件事我也不知道
I know Travis and Laurie care for each other,
我知道崔维斯和劳里两个人很好
but I don't know how much they've seriously considered a future together.
但是我不知道他们有没有考虑过未来
How do I break the news?
我要怎么告诉他们这件事
Break what news to who?
和谁说什么事
Mrs. Goldstein... that her husband is gay.
告诉戈尔斯坦夫人她丈夫是同性恋
Well, on a happier relationship note,
告诉你们一件好事
Laurie and I have taken a big step.
我和劳里又向前跨了一步
We decided to get pretend-married!
我们决定假装结婚
But pretend marriage is hard work, y'all!
但是假结婚好累呀
That's why we need to pound some serious grape.
所以我们需要喝点酒
Jules, what the f-train?
茱尔斯搞毛线啊
We're out of wine. That bottle's pretty much full.
没有酒了那瓶还挺多的啊
No, I spit in this one,
我在这瓶酒里吐口水了
you know, 'cause I do that sometimes.
你知道我经常这么做
Okay, really gross.
好吧太恶心了
Mom, we got to go raid your closet
妈我们俩要去洗劫你的衣柜
because we need to find a classy purse.
因为我们得找一个高大上的手包
Yean. All my purses are either dayglo
是啊我的手包不是颜色超亮
Or held up in a police-evidence locker, so...
或者是所在警方物证室所以
Shall we, my husband?
走吧老公
After you, my lovely wife. Thank you.
您先请老婆谢谢
Well, that's a great sign, right?
这是好事对吧
I mean, Laurie and Travis are pretend-married!
劳瑞和崔维斯假装结婚的事
Unfortunately, a real child born into a pretend marriage
不过就算是假装结婚有了真孩子的话
is still technically a bastard...
严格的说还是得算私生子
in case anyone was wondering.
如果有人想知道的话
I was mildly curious.
我很想知道的
You know what I just realized?
你知道吗
If Travis has a baby, that makes me a granddaddy.
要是崔维斯有了孩子我就是祖父了
And I'll be married to a grandma...
那我要娶的人还当了奶奶呢
which makes me a grandpa.
那我就是爷爷了
Look at you two -- a pair of sweet, old grandpappies!
看看你们俩一对甜蜜的老爷爷
Might I trouble one of you for a Werther's Original?
你俩谁能给我块太妃糖吗
Man, a few hours ago, we were about to throw down
天哪几小时前我们刚抛出一个
in a breaking competition, and now we're grandpas.
街舞挑战现在我们就成爷爷了
Grandpas don't belong in breaking battles.
爷爷才不会上街舞战场呢
They're fragile, and loud music frightens them.
他们腿脚不便而且害怕大声的音乐
Man, why is my neck so stiff? I'm so sore.
真是的我的脖子又硬又酸
That would be joint inflammation,
那肯定是关节炎
one of the common symptoms of growing really old --
年老体衰的重要标志
also, vision problems, loose bowels, turkey neck,
其它还有老花眼腹泻皮肤松弛
growing enlargement of the mons pubis...
阴♥阜♥增长异常等